Chapter Nineteen

“So,” Jetty said, after the game, cornering Trevor as soon as he’d hit the showers. “Nick chose to wear your jersey, huh?”

Trevor’s hackles were immediately raised, and he frowned. “What’s your problem, man? He’s my nanny. Why wouldn’t he wear my jersey?”

Jetty was silent for a moment. So long that Trevor didn’t think he would answer, but then he sighed, leaning against the way. “Trevor, this isn’t meant to be an accusation, but you have to see how it looks.”

“And how exactly is that?” Trevor asked, an edge to his voice.

“You choose to reveal the fact that you have a daughter during a game but you don’t bring your mother as most people would expect given that this is you, but you bring a guy who looks entirely too comfortable with her.”

Trevor snorted, rolling his eyes. “You’re making more out of this than there needs to be. The press guys will release a statement that he’s my nanny. Which, if you’d bothered to ask, I would have told you.”

“The fact that you didn’t deny it,” Jetty said shrewdly, “Says more about that than your story.”

“I am not sleeping with Nick,” Trevor said, hating every word that fell out of his mouth. It was a lie, one that he didn’t relish having to tell. “Not that it should matter if I am!”

Jetty held up his hands, backing up a step. “I’m not saying that, man, come on.”

“Then why bring it up?” Trevor shoved past him, not caring who they drew into the argument. “Nobody should give a fuck who I sleep with as long as I’m posting points.”

Looking frustrated, Jetty followed him more sedately, glaring at anyone who seemed to be gearing up to get involved. “I’m trying to protect you man. He’s your nanny. You don’t wanna start that shit. Think about how it looks.”

“Everyone,” Trevor snapped, poking a finger in Jetty’s direction, “is always so interested in how it looks. Who the fuck cares? I already told you I wasn’t fucking him.”

There was a low murmur in the room and Trevor’s eyes snapped around to each and every one of his teammates. There would be time to freak out about this later, but right now he couldn’t keep his anger in check, couldn’t stop thinking about Nick and Gabrielle who were out there waiting for him. Fuck anyone if they thought they had any say about who Trevor chose to sleep with.

“If I was fucking him, it wouldn’t matter if I was putting points on the scoreboard and helping take this team to the championship. It’s nobody’s business, Jetty, and if you don’t understand that, back the hell off and leave me the fuck alone.”

“Trevor,” Pears said sharply. “Nobody is saying you can’t sleep with who you like–”

“Really?” Trevor threw his arms out, trying to encompass everyone in the room. “Because from where I’m standing, too many people are interested in whether or not I’m sleeping with my nanny.”

Pears colored, eyes darting around the room. “Does anyone here think that?”

Nobody moved.

Trevor snarled. “Come on, Jetty. You think that.”

“I didn’t mean that,” Jetty said, surprised by the vehemence of Trevor’s anger. Fuck that. Trevor didn’t have to stand around listening to his doubts, wondering why he’d brought Nick to the game.

“Let it go,” Trevor said, anger draining in favor of exhaustion. His back was up and he couldn’t let go of his irritation, but he chose to focus on Gabrielle instead. “If you think I would do anything to jeopardize my daughter and her relationships with those around her, fuck you.”

Without waiting to see what anyone would say, knowing that he would have to call Pears and Jetty eventually, even if it was only to apologize, Trevor grabbed his gear and hauled ass out of the locker room, managing to avoid the swell of media and the staff.

Gabrielle and Nick were waiting, Gabrielle clutching her puck to her chest, but pressing it into Nick’s hands when she saw Trevor. She raced across the compound, throwing herself into Trevor’s arms.

“You were so good, Daddy!”

“I was, huh?” The anger seemed to completely wash away in the face of Gabrielle’s happiness as she babbled a mile a minute about the game. When he could get a word in edgewise, Trevor poked her on the nose. “I’m glad you enjoyed yourself.”

“It was all right,” Nick interjected, lifting a shoulder. The smile on his face was soft and open and Trevor’s heart lurched painfully.

What did it matter how Nick had come into Trevor’s life? So what if he was Gabrielle’s nanny. It wasn’t as if Trevor was in a relationship and was letting a dalliance with his nanny interfere. Just because some people were assholes, didn’t mean Trevor had to be tarred with the same brush.

“What say we get home?” Trevor kissed Gabrielle’s temple as she looped her arms around his neck, burying her face against his shoulder.

“She was tiring during the third,” Nick said, grabbing the keys from Trevor’s outstretched hand. “Until you scored, that is.”

“It was pretty awesome,” Trevor said, flashing Nick a grin.

Nick laughed, eyes crinkled at the corners, and fuck, he looked good. Trevor didn’t want to have to give it up, even if certain members of his team had a problem with it. Nick climbed into the driver’s seat as Trevor buckled Gabrielle into her car seat. He couldn’t bring himself to argue, glad to be rid of the effort of having to pay attention to the drive home. There was a headache blossoming at the base of his skull and as he dropped into the passenger seat, he let his head roll against the back of the headrest.

“All right?” Nick asked quietly, pulling out of the parking lot. As usual, there were a lot of fans waiting out on the concourse, but Nick had taken the back way.

“How did you know to do that?”

Nick gave him an incredulous look. “You think I wouldn’t have figured out the best way out of here without you being mobbed?”

Trevor didn’t know what to say, staring at Nick and feeling nothing but love bleed through his body. It was on the tip of his tongue to say it, to put some words to what he had been thinking this whole time, but nothing was coming out like his throat was too tight with emotion and indecision.

Thankfully, Nick didn’t seem to need any words. He turned back to the road. Trevor let himself stare, Nick’s profile intoxicating. He was concentrating on driving, but Trevor could tell from the pink of his cheeks that he knew Trevor was looking.

“Stop it,” Nick said, lips curved up into a smile.

“Why?” Trevor tucked his elbow into the frame of the window and rested his head on his hand. “Maybe I just wanna stare at you.”

“I’m trying to drive,” Nick protested half-heartedly. “Gabrielle’s in the back.”

Trevor stared back at her. She was asleep, her head tucked into the side of her car seat, hands lax in her lap. “You’d never hurt her,” he said eventually, certainty coloring his tone.

“Trevor.” Nick’s voice was wrecked, and as they pulled through the gates of the parking lot, he looked over, eyes darting to Trevor’s lips, before focusing on the road.

Knowing they had to have that conversation he’d promised, Trevor almost wanted to ignore it and drag Nick up to bed with him. He still hadn’t managed to get Nick to fuck him, and he realized that he wanted it desperately, especially after the game and the aftermath.

Shutting off the car, Nick shifted in his seat, turning to face Trevor head-on. He lifted a hand to Trevor’s face, brushing a thumb against his cheek. Trevor didn’t know how to react to the softness with his emotions in such a state, torn between pulling away and leaning into it. His need for comfort won out and he turned his face into Nick’s hand, kissing the warm palm beneath his lips.

“Wanna tell me what’s up with you?” Nick said.

Trevor’s eyes darted to Gabrielle, who was still fast asleep, and his chest tightened painfully. “I want to tell you about Clara. Gabrielle’s mom,” he amended at the confusion on Nick’s face. “I just don’t know where to start.”

Nick’s expression was neutral as he stared at Trevor as if he couldn’t work out whether Trevor was telling him the truth. Trevor just let himself relax into Nick’s touch, looking as tired as he felt, and hoped that Nick bought it. “So let it come naturally.”

Laughing a little, strained, Trevor shifted forward, drawing Nick into a soft kiss. “Not sure that’s possible.”

“I mean,” Nick continued, thumb resting against Trevor’s bottom lip. “If it doesn’t feel natural to tell me now, wait until it is.”

Trevor wanted to; hiding behind an excuse would make everything better in his mind. He didn’t want to revisit Clara, didn’t want to think about Gabrielle and why she’s so clingy. Didn’t want to contemplate a world in which someone would willingly give Gabrielle away. There was another part of him that knew telling Nick would lift a weight from his shoulders, as keeping secrets from someone you want a relationship with isn’t a solid foundation.

Tired and with residual anger from the game, Trevor didn’t have to keep it in for much longer; maybe after a good sleep, Nick at his side, he could make the words come.

“All right,” he agreed. “In the morning.”

Nick’s smile was soft, and he pressed another kiss to Trevor’s lips before gesturing to Gabrielle in the back. “Let’s get her into bed. Then we can get you into bed.”

“Only if you’re there too,” Trevor said immediately.

Smile widening into a blinding grin, Nick’s shrug was easy. “There’s nowhere else I would rather be.”

His words held such certainty that Trevor’s heart lurched painfully, but not unwanted.