Chapter Two
Xia
I’m in trouble, thanks to the hazel-eyed blond who sees too much and has a deep, soulful voice that makes my knees weak. Most of my relationships have been casual; the only semi-serious one crashed and burned when he saw how much went into my work. It’s been a string of dating partners who don’t last more than three dates ever since.
None of these men affected me in the visceral way Shayne does. Despite his casual appearance, there’s an edge to him that makes him seem bigger than he is. If he thinks I’m hiding a personality, I’m not alone. It’s never smart to be involved with someone you work with. Just being related is hard enough. I can’t imagine how adding more volatile emotions into the mix would affect your work environment.
I shouldn’t even be thinking about him, but whether I like it or not he’s gotten under my skin. Striping off my clothes, I pitch them into the laundry bin, and step into a warm shower. I let the water beat down on my shoulders, unknotting my stiff muscles. Fridays are always insane, and training another person requires more mental power than usual.
In the end, I’m drained like a battery that needs to be placed on a recharge station. Shayne’s a fast learner, but there’s a vast range of things to teach. I sigh. Here I am, home, and still thinking about him. No more.
I focus on getting a lather with my mermaid tail soap and washing away the day. The hours have been grueling with everyone split between the current truck and the one to come. It sticks in my craw, and I hate that. I wish I could cut the bitter part out of me and turn it into a motivator, but there’s something unforgivable about family betrayal. After a life of being overlooked, patronized, and guilted into putting the greater good of the family before my own wants and needs. It’s a raw, bloody, infected wound I’m not sure will ever heal properly.
The recovery process can’t begin until I quit. Seeing everyone day in and day out is too much. It’s scary, preparing to leave everything behind, and stepping out completely on my own without support or backing. It’s now how Foleys do it. The water turns cold, chasing me from the stall and on to dressing. I’ve got a mini Death Note marathon planned with Jas and Andy. Real friends are the people you can wear your pajamas around.
At least that’s what I tell myself as I pull on my Lazy Bones T-shirt with matching Skull and Crossbones boxer shorts. Slipping my feet into black flip flops, I call it a day. I have no one to impress, and zero fucks left to give. I have to be back at the truck bright and early to start the training process all over again, and the only thing keeping me going is this mini reprieve tonight. A human isn’t meant to toil endlessly without breaks or things to look forward to. My goal remains achievable until I make major changes. It’s brought me down in a way I’ve never experienced before.
I always considered myself lucky to have a job I loved. Now that love is turning to hate, and my heart is hardening at an alarming rate. I’m sinking fast, and trying to bail enough water to keep me afloat while I wait for the raft I called in for a rescue to arrive. I leave the house, eager to escape the regret, and ghost taunting me for the decisions I’ve made over the years. My head is a loud echo chamber for drama right now. The state of being has me off kilter, and gloomy.
With my hair breaded around my head in a dark brown crown, I lock the door behind me and welcome the moonlit night and warm air.
***
“Why don’t you go get everything ready while we make the drinks?” Jas asks.
“It’s so sweet how you tell me to get lost without actually saying the words.” Andy kisses her on the cheek, and I laugh as he disappears from the kitchen.
“You look exhausted. Is everything okay?” Jas inquires the moment he clears the room.
“I am. Training slows everything down, so work takes twice as long, and Shayne is so cocky it makes me sick.”
Jas’s thin lips form an O.
“Jas, I’m telling you, he lives to get on my nerves. He always has something to say when we’re alone, which is most of the time.” I shake my head. “And why is he so cocky? It must be etched in his DNA. The way he stands, talks … hell, the way he smells. Can a man perspire Alpha pheromones?”
“Alpha is an interesting word to use,” Jas says coyly.
“Why?” I narrow my gaze at her.
“Well in the past minute alone you’ve mentioned pheromones and Alpha. I think the lady doth protest too much.”
“Ugh. No, Jas.”
“What?” she asks innocently.
“I’ve never liked Alpha-holes.”
She smirks. “Your mind not, but I think your body does. Hormones are biologically based, not psychological.”
“You’re supposed to be my friend.”
“Best friend, which means I’m your truth giver.”
I mumble as we pull out the ice, limes, mint, rum, and club soda. We work together chopping mint and limes as we measure out the liquid. By now we’ve got it down to a science.
“Are you going to stay mad at me, or think about what I said?”
“Ugh. I’m not mad.”
“Mmm hmm.”
“I’m frustrated with the entire situation. What I love is turning into the very thing I’m starting to hate, and it breaks my heart.”
Setting down the pitcher, she shakes her head. “No. What you hate is the way they try to put you in a box, and make you do things their way. Don’t let this setback ruin the joy and passion you have for Magical Munchies. I know you’ve been waiting a long time, and it’s disheartening, but I never had any doubt that you would make it. You’re in the home stretch here. Get Shayne trained, set your plans in motion, and let’s get it done.”
“You’re going to help me?”
“Of course, I am. You know my schedule is flexible. I can’t do it indefinitely, but I can hang tight until you train some reliable staff.”
I give her a spontaneous hug. “Thank you.”
“You have always been there for me. How could I do any differently?” Jas asks softly.
We separate, and I can’t help but smile as my spirits lift.
“Now about this mysterious Shayne, who I really need to see with my own eyes.”
“Jas.”
She tuts me. “Let me finish. Don’t take your anger at your family out on him.”
“I’m not.”
“Aren’t you?”
I examine her words. “I don’t think I am. He just rubs me the wrong way.”
“Or the right way.” She wiggles her eyebrows.
“Come on.”
“All I know is you light up when you talk about him. Have some hate sex, free up that tight kitty, and see how it loosens you up. You are wound so tight I might start calling you Cogsworth.”
“Listen, Lumiere. You know I don’t do casual sex,” I counter, referencing the randy candlestick from Beauty and the Beast. I made the mistake of attempting it once, and it didn’t sit well with me.
“Cogsworth, there’s a first time for everything, and if I’m reading this situation right, you’re in for a lot of new experiences.”
“No,” I protest. Once she gets a hold of an idea, she’s as stubborn as a dog with its favorite bone.
“Are the drinks ready, ladies?” Andy calls.
“Yep. We’re headed in now,” Jas replies as she lifts up the pitcher and I grab the tray with the glasses and lime wedges. “Enough worry. It’s time to relax and let the day remain behind us where it belongs.”
I nod my head. I’ve always admired and envied her ability to let things go. It’s been said one or a million times I beat a dead horse. I force myself to turn off my brain as I settle on the love seat diagonal from the couch with a fresh mojito.
“Are you ladies ready?” Andy asks.
“Yes, sir. Let her rip.”
Almost instantly, I’m drawn into the dark and mysterious world of the Shinigami, Gods of Death from the Japanese lore.
***
I scrub my face with my hands as I eyeball our stock. We’re running low on sides. I’m not sure why our sales have spiked recently, but I have a suspicion the dimpled blond is a huge factor in the longer than usual lines full of females. With our smoky, sweet, tangy, and hot sauces, our demographic tends to possess the Y chromosome more than the X.
I watch, amused as a petite blonde in her early-twenties bats her eyelashes and orders a pulled pork sandwich with Carolina-style sauce, coleslaw, and a side of mac and cheese done three ways. It’s amazing how much the mac and cheese flavor is elevated when you add more complex cheeses types.
He takes her money and makes change. He’s not cold, but his disinterest is clear. My thoughts go back to the conversations I’ve had with Jas. I’ve never seen him be receptive to a come on. Perhaps I was mistaken about him being non-selective. It causes waves in my belly. No. I can’t afford to let my stance shift on this. Damn you, Jas. Now that she’s put the thoughts in my head, I can’t stop my mind from wandering. He has strong hands. Big and capable with callouses that speak to hard work. I can’t fault his work ethic. Or how fine he is.
I return my attention to the order.
Maybe it’s time I get back on the horse. If I’m having daydreams about a man I don’t even like, I’m more sexually frustrated than I imagined.
“The girls love this one, don’t they?”
I smirk at Casp. As the younger of my brothers, he was automatically easier to deal with than Ellis. Big brother had the weight of the world placed on his shoulders and was often charged with caring for us and helping out Mom while Dad was working. If he ever resented that, he hid it well.
Meeting Casper’s sparkling, chocolate brown gaze, I nod my head in agreement. With his curly brown hair, oval-shaped face, olive skin, and lanky build, he’s the perfect blend of both my parents. In his skinny jeans and black rimmed glasses, he embodies the word hipster.
“It would appear so.”
“I’m not complaining. I like money as much as the next person,” he says with a shrug.
I laugh, and Ellis turns toward me.
“What?”
“Nothing. We’re going to run out of mac and cheese and coleslaw in the next hour if we don’t send people off for prep,” I reply.
“I know. This is insane for a week day.”
“It’s summer, and we’re good food on a budget for college kids trying to save up for their next semester,” I counter.
“Yeah, you’re right. Let me know when you want to head out, and Casp will take over on the register.”
“Why me?”
“Because you’re prettier,” Ellis says.
Casp rolls his eyes.
“It’s true, Casp,” I tease.
“Screw both of you.”
Casp breathes through his nose. “Humph.”
Ellis nudges me with his elbow, and I laugh until my stomach aches. For a moment in time, we’re just three siblings, working at a job they love together. I hold the snapshot of time close to my heart, capturing it in a freeze frame and storing it in my memory. In a few weeks, they’ll be splitting their time between the new truck and here. I won’t see them nearly as much.
“I’ll go now. Let Casp switch over. I don’t want us to run out in the middle of a rush.”
As we leave the truck, I can’t help but shake the feeling that this is the beginning of the end.
***
Shayne
It’s strange how easy it is to slip into my new life. It feels good to work with my hands. I don’t mind dealing with the public in small doses now that I’ve learned to channel my charm into more than flirting. I’m actually enjoying learning the trade. One thing my dad handed down was his love for grilling. Off the top of my head, I can make at least five mean marinades and sauces. This reminds me of that time in my life when he was like Superman—we all did things as a family, and the future lay in front of us like an endless blacktop road that ran through sun-kissed California scenery.
There’s also a feeling of accomplishment I haven’t experienced in a long time.
I finish storing the sanitized equipment. It’s almost quitting time, and like most nights the brothers left earlier to attend to other things. I don’t think they mean to be dicks, but the effect is the same regardless. “Hail to the Chief” by Avenge Seven Fold blares from Xia’s pocket, and she sighs.
“Hey, Dad. … Yeah, we’re just about ready to close up for the night. … What? No. … Yeah, they’re long gone. … Do I have—” She rolls her eyes. “It’s awfully last minute, don’t you think?” She grits her teeth, and her eyes darken with anger. “Yeah. … Oh, I know. … Uh huh. Of course, I will. … Yep, you too.” I’d never heard a person pop a P and make it sound like a bullet until now.
I stand and take a step back. “Everything okay?”
“We’re being rewarded for all our hard work this month. A night out on the company dime.” Her words are tinged with annoyance. I’m not offended by her outward aversion to me when I see the longing in her gaze. It’s clear she’s used to living a life of denial. I’ve never been the type to curb anything.
It makes the pursuit a lesson in patience and real want. Lust is easy— a hot, quick burst of pleasure that’s forgotten when the moment passes. What I feel for Xia is a slow burn simmering beneath the surface. It’ll take more than a few nights to assuage myself of the ache in the pit of my stomach.
“Do you always do what your fathers asks you to?” I want to get inside of her head and see what makes her tick. Her life has been the polar opposite of mine, and any good hunter takes the time to learn about its prey.
“No.”
“Then why are you offering to take me out tonight? You’ve made it clear where we stand ... or have you changed your mind?”
“About?” she asks dryly. Her voice is even, but the slight tremor in her hand gives her away.
“This unexplained thing that exists between us.”
“Please, attraction is nothing but a biological response.”
“You’re wrong,” I say.
“I’m sure you own a mirror. We both know you’re easy on the eyes.”
She rolls her eyes. “Are you trying to tell me you think you’re ugly?”
“Am I?” I wink as she scoffs. “About attraction. It’s a precursor to a deeper level of compatibility.”
She licks her lips, and I step closer.
“I can see the want in your eyes, Xia. Why fight it?”
“Be-because mixing business with pleasure could be disastrous, and I don’t do casual sex.”
“Nothing about what will happen between us will be casual.” Tiny bumps cover her bare arms, and her eyes dilate. “We’ve spent the past month dancing around one another. If this thing was going to wane it would’ve.”
“You are the one who continues to feed it with those comments and those knowing eyes.” The accusatory tone and anger that flashes, darkening her eyes to a nearly black color, make my skin tingle.
I want to be on the receiving end of all that fire.
“Are you trying to convince yourself of that, or me? ’Cause I’m not buying it. This is a two-way street.”
She growls and her nostrils flare. “Cocky.”
“Confident and honest. Life’s too short to deny yourself the things you really want.” I break eye contact as the weight of the past year slams into me. The demon raises up inside of me. She’s right to resist. You don’t deserve a second glance. If she knew what I’d believed in the past and how I’d acted, she’d never speak to me again. I trace her full lips longingly with my eyes. She shivers, and her lips part like a flower in the sun. “You make it impossible to walk away,” I whisper. Stepping closer, I place a hand on either side of her body as I pin her to the counter with my bigger frame. “Do you really want me to leave you alone, Xia? Tell me you don’t like the things I say or the way I make you feel, and we’ll never have this problem again.”
“We should …” Her voice trails off.
“That’s not what I asked you.”
Her lids close halfway. “I don’t—”
“Give me tonight. One evening without road blocks or opposition. Let me show you how it could be between us.”
“Shayne—”
“What do you have to lose?”
She shakes her head.
“All I need is one word. Aren’t you tired of bottling it all up? I see you when no one else around us does. You hide in plain sight with those fake smiles and that compliant behavior. Happiness never reaches your eyes. I want to spend a day with the mysterious woman I see lurking in those dark eyes. I want an entire evening with the real Xia.”
“Okay,” she whispers.
It’s a Herculean effort not to close the small distance between us and brush her plump lips. I push away from her. What’s between us deserves more than a rush job. I will take my time and build up instead of tear down. I’m a man on a quest, not just to win the fair maiden, but to prove I’m worthy of good things. I came close to the edge; steps away from being a complete monster. After so much destruction, I long to create.
“I’ll plan everything. You relax for once.”
“But I know the city.”
“I’m a resourceful man.”
She studies me for a moment. “I’m not the only one who hides. I see you, too … hidden behind the seemingly harmless façade you exude, there’s something hungry.”
***
I try not to swallow my tongue as she steps out onto her front porch and I take in the deep cut black dress with a tiny gold pattern. I can see the swell of her breasts and a long, graceful neck. Who knew a neck could be this damn sexy? Unlike some of the girls who hang around the club, her face isn’t shellacked with makeup, but she’s been transformed from the woman I work with. Her lips look like they’re coated with the juice from a dark berry. I want to lick them to see if they taste as good as they look.
I clear my throat. “You look amazing.”
She smiles up at me. “So do you.”
It’s the only date I can ever remember making an effort for. In a pair of dark jeans and a black button down shirt, I feel like I should be headed to a wedding. We don’t throw on duds like these unless we’re trying to stay out of jail or getting hitched. Sometimes, not even then.
“Thanks. Have you ever been on a motorcycle before?”
“I have. And,” lifting her dress, she sticks out her tennis shoe clad foot, “I’m prepared.”
I laugh, and the ice is broken. It’s a whole different experience. She’s relaxed and open. It’s like a light has been turned on from inside because I can only describe her as radiant. She hands me a large black wallet with cat’s ears and whiskers. My lips twitch.
“What? I like cats.”
“I said nothing.” I store it in my saddle bag. She climbs on behind me with confidence that assures me she’s not going to do anything stupid while I’m on the highway. “You have done this before.”
“One of my best friends, Andy, has a bike. I was there for his obsession and love fest from about fourteen on.”
“I hope he graduated to something decent now.”
“Oh, yeah. He’s got a Harley. He and his wife love to go for rides.”
“Are you friends with her?”
“Actually, yeah. They’re high school sweethearts, and the best friends I’ve hung on to from childhood. Having a front row seat to their blossoming romance was interesting to say the least, and stressful as hell until they figured it out.”
I laugh as I pull out of the drive and hit the highway. I like the feel of her thighs wrapped around me and her arms around my waist. Her breasts are firm and large where they’re pressed against my back.
When we arrive at our destination, I find parking and help her off the motorcycle.
“I hope you’re feeling adventurous.”
We make our way over to Chinatown, and she cranes that swan-like neck to take in the round, red paper lanterns hung on strings above our heads, and the ornate decorations on the buildings.
“I think we should get food, and take our photos first. From what I read, those two things become harder as the night goes on.”
“I can’t remember the last time I went to Chinatown Summer Nights. Probably a few years ago for research.”
“No work talk tonight,” I remind her.
“You like giving orders, don’t you?”
I shrug. “I prefer to call them gentle suggestions. I’m used to running things back home.”
“Yeah, I’m not.”
“I disagree. You could give a drill sergeant a run for his money on the food truck.”
“I meant in taking orders.”
“You haven’t been handled by the right person.” When she curls up her lips, I ignore her skepticism. It’ll be my pleasure to show her how well she can take orders. “I hope you like lobster.”
“Depends on the source.”
“I knew you’d be a food snob. That’s why I checked Yelp. We’re headed to the Lobsta Truck.”
“You chose well, but since we’re on the company dime, I plan on stuffing myself with sweets. Remember, you wanted this.” I tilt my head to the side, and she laughs. “The full Xia experience. I’m a candy-aholic.”
“I’ll keep that in mind. What are some of your favorites?”
“I love the sour sweet things, like sour cherries, Sour Patch Kids, gummy bears, and Swedish Fish.”
The conversation is light as we weave through the crowd and grab our lobster rolls, Cape Cod potato chips, and freshly squeezed lemonade. I never put much thought into food before. Now I’m savoring flavors and thinking about the prep work that went into what I’m eating. It’s a culture shock as we travel the streets full of people.
I can hear a few different languages being spoken, and skin tones and styles are a hodgepodge. I’m impressed by the diversity they’ve managed to cram into one sector. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before. This is the difference between San Mateo and Los Angeles. They don’t call it a melting pot for nothing.
We make our way to a station where the renowned artist, Nori Shirasu, is creating nothing short of magic with a paint brush. This is way more than I was expecting when I read an artist would be here.
I thought of the cheesy Sanskrit names we used to see done at the local fair. I’m out of my depth here. I peer at Xia out of the corner of my eye. She’s enraptured by the man kneeling on what appears to be a mat. His setup is simplistic. A throwback to days gone by with his brown glazed bowls full of ink, ink pads, paint brushes, and tools that are foreign to me.
He holds himself like a warrior—one arm out in front of him, poised to strike—only he creates instead of destroys. Hip hop comes from a speaker as he sets fire to an empty canvas, turning the blank space into art.
I fast realize how small my world has been even with the travel for the club. As the sun sets, the lanterns are turned on. Neon lights molded against the sharply pointed ends of the buildings reminiscent of pagodas from Asia create a unique accent.
“Do you have anything like this where you’re from?”
“In San Mateo? No, it’s a small city outside of San Diego, which has a completely different vibe than Los Angeles.”
“How are you liking it here?”
“It’s as good as any place. This is the first chance I’m getting to experience the city since I arrived.” I’ve been in L.A. for business before for the club, and the last thing on my mind at the time was sight-seeing.
We pass a booth that features pastries and sweets, and I pause. “Sweet stop?”
The smile she gives me is genuine and blinding. I feel like I’ve been sucker punched. I thought she was beautiful before, but now she’s stunning. It’s not the dress or the makeup, it’s her essence.
I wait patiently as she picks out a few pastries.
“You should never hide yourself away.”
She glances up at me. “You’re the only one who thinks that. My family is very close-minded, conservative, and overbearing. It used to be my mission to get things changed, but I can see now I’ve gone about it the wrong way.” She shakes her head.
“Why?”
“Because I’m not what they want me to be. I never was, and they think magically after so many years that’ll change.”
“And what is it you want?”
“To have my own truck and be myself. I’m really not that complicated.”
I can’t find any fault in what’s she said. It’s a decent desire. “Why is that a problem?”
“Because in my family, women tend to stay in the background, and fit the Southern bell mode.” She shoves another bun into her mouth, ending the talk. “Look, a photo booth! Let’s get pictures.”
She grabs my hand and pulls me inside. A jolt of electricity sparks between us. Our gazes met as we step inside the tiny rectangle. Sitting on the stool, I pat my lap. When she lowers herself to perch on my knee, I wrap an arm around her waist and pull her back to my front. She squirms.
“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” I whisper into her ear.
She shivers. The screen counts down, and we pose. The bulb flashes. I wrap my hand around her neck.
“Xia.”
She turns her body toward me, eyes half-lidded and lips parted. I move in slowly, and our lips brush. Whoosh. The curtain opens. We jerk apart.
“Sorry.” The teenage couple laughs as they replace the curtain and rush away. With the moment ruined, we force our attention back to the remaining two photos. The rest of the evening is less eventful but revealing.
I’m almost sad when it’s time to say goodbye and I return her home. “Tonight was fun, but getting in deeper would be a mistake. I have a lot going on right now. It wouldn’t be fair to either of us.” She’s a queen holding court—beautiful, regal, and trying so hard to be aloof.
“You worried about protecting my feelings? That’s sweet. I think I can handle it though.”
“Let’s just leave tonight where it belongs … in the past.”
Gripping the door frame, I lean in, meeting her steady gaze. I see the heat burning there for me. I can slow it down, but I have no intention of stopping it.
“What are you so afraid of?”
Her eyes soften. “Everything, which is exactly why I’m going to say goodnight,” she whispers.
“Good night, Xia,” I say as I step back and she closes the door. I feel like I’m leaving her in a tower of solitude. The woman I’d spent the evening with disappeared before my eyes. She slipped through my fingers like sand. I’ll bide my time. I’m a patient man. A good hunter is well acquainted with waiting.