Chapter Eight
Xia
“What’s up?” I ask, cradling the phone to my ear as I wash dishes.
“Calling to give you a heads up. Dad asked me why I was training so many new people today, and I told him to ask you.”
“Great.” I roll my r.
“Don’t shoot the messenger.”
“I won’t. I knew the time was coming. They’ll be announcing the competitors soon at the radio station. Did he say he was going to call?”
“No. Considering how big this is, he might stop by. So, if you don’t want him to know about Shayne yet, I suggest making sure you’re alone.”
I roll my eyes. “No, I’m done with hiding. Shayne’s an amazing guy, and he’s going to be pissed off either way.”
“This is true. Better to do it all in one fell swoop.”
“Thanks for having my back, big bro.”
“We got you. I’m just sorry it took us so long to see how lacking we were.”
“But you did, and that’s all that matters in the end. I expected to be going up against all of you, so having you on my side is a relief.” My phone beeps. “Crap. This is Dad. I’ll call you back later if we don’t kill each other.”
“What’s going on?” Shayne asks.
Shaking my head, I hold up my pointer finger.
“Hey, Dad.”
“Why are we hiring so many people. Do you have some new marketing planned that I don’t know about?” he asks.
“Dad, this isn’t a conversation to have on the phone. Do you think you could come over?”
“I don’t like the way this is sounding, pumpkin.”
“You probably won’t like the rest I have to say either.”
He sighs. “Are you pregnant?”
“What?” I cry.
“I’ll take that as a no.”
“Why would you even ask that?”
“You’ve been different lately ... moody, and not yourself.”
“Hah. I’m impressed you even noticed.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asks.
I sigh. “Just come over, Dad. We have a lot of things to discuss.”
“Fine. I’ll head over that way now.”
The final showdown is about to begin. At least it’ll be on my turf. Returning to the home where I grew up would’ve put me in the wrong head space for this talk. I need all the advantages I can get.
“Is your Dad on his way over here right now?”
I turn to face him and shove my hands into the pockets of my long black skirt. “He is, and I’d like you to stay.”
“This is your family. We can handle it however you want. I refuse to pretend we aren’t seeing each other. The omission is okay. Lying is a problem. Unless you’re ashamed of seeing me.”
“I never said that.”
“No, but I’m pretty damn sure I don’t fit your father’s dating criteria.”
Pushing away from the sink, I go over to fix the collar of his button down T-shirt. “Good thing you’re dating me and not him then, huh?” I tilt my head back and press a gentle kiss to his lips.
“You trying to distract me?” he asks against my lips.
“Trying to draw strength.” I nip his bottom lip and tug.
He growls. “Your Dad is on his way.”
“Then I guess you’d better make it quick.”
He lifts me up, and I squeal as I wrap my legs around his waist as he stumbles to the wall. Our lips move together while I sink my hands into his thick hair. I tilt my head, thrusting my tongue into his mouth as I sample everything he has to offer. My heart is pounding in my chest, and my panties are damp. All he has to do is use that certain tone, and I’m aching and needy. He has my body trained with his every touch, command, and request. I never thought I’d be into that kind of play, but with him, it works.
He shoves my skirt up and pushes my panties to the side. “So wet for me.”
“I’m always dripping when you’re around.” Propping me against the wall, he quickly removes his belt. With his pants around his thighs, he thrusts home.
I arch my back, digging my nails into his shoulders through his shirt, and we move together. I’m feeling the threat of being caught and the need for release and the feeling of freedom. Flexing my muscles, I contract around him as he stretches and fills me—physically, mentally and spiritually. Suddenly realizing how deep my emotions for him run, I explode around.
He follows shortly after, flooding me with warmth. Too full to speak, I bury my face in his neck, inhaling his musky ocean breeze scent as I cling to him. He smells like wind, sun, and man. I lower my shaky legs, and he tugs on my earlobe, fanning the flames of last minute aftershocks. I moan, wishing we had time for round two.
“We should clean up.”
He cages me in with arms on either side of my face. “You’re going to keep all that in like a good girl as a reminder. No matter where you are or who you’re with, you belong to me.”
“Oh, God.”
He chuckles.
“Don’t you dare say it,” I growl.
He clamps his mouth shut as we straighten up. “Don’t worry I’ll clean you up in the shower tonight before I put you to bed properly.” From others, I dated that would’ve been an euphemism. With Shayne, it’s a matter of fact. I’ve never had a man put a loving on me so good I can do little more than close my eyes and let sleep take me until now.
The knock on the door makes me jump at the sink. I quickly wash my hands and open the window above the sink.
“Use an air freshener, please.”
Laughing, he kneels and pulls out the fresh linen spray. The clean scent follows me out into the living room to the front door. I can’t deny I’m infinitely more relaxed. I open the door, and my father’s eyes widen as he takes in my black halter-style corset.
“Hey, Dad, come on in.”
He steps inside and takes in my apartment. “I haven’t been here in a long time.”
“No, you haven’t.”
He glances around. “It looks different.”
I bet it does. I didn’t Dad proof the house.
Shayne clears his throat behind me.
“Is this a work meeting?” Dad asks slowly. His lips turn down at the corners and his eyes darken as he stands up straight, on the offense.
“No, Dad. This is my boyfriend, Shayne.” I hold my breath, and wait for the fall out.
His nostrils flare. “You’re dating your employee?”
“I’m not his boss, Dad. Yes, I trained him, but he’s the one assisting me now.”
“Of all the people you could date, you choose one you work with?” he asks. His lips curl up in disgust and his eyes shine with disapproval.
“We both know that’s not how matters of the heart work.” I want him to see past his rigid rules.
He scoffs. “Is this why you called me here? Because I don’t see what this has to do with hiring new employees.”
“It doesn’t. He happened to be here when Ellis called to say you might stop by. I’m too old to be hiding my relationships from you.” I shift my weight. His quick dismissal stings.
“You know I don’t approve of mixing business with pleasure. Working with family is tricky enough.” He shakes his head.
“I know, Dad. But Shayne is worth the risk.”
“For your sake, I hope you’re right.” He fixes his stare on Shayne. “As you know by now, my daughter is as tough as nails. She doesn’t need me to fight her battles. That being said, if you do hurt her, I’ll be coming for you, and one thing I know how to do coming from Texas is shoot. You get my meaning?”
“Yes, sir.” He nods respectfully, and my admiration for him grows.
“Now you, little girl, need to start talking.”
“We’re training new employees because at the end of the month I’ll be leaving Smoke.”
“How long will the vacation be?”
Forever. “No, Dad, I’m resigning.”
“Are you still upset about that second truck?”
I shake my head. “This isn’t a tantrum or ploy to get you to change your mind, Dad. I’m just following my own route to my dream.”
“By doing what?”
“Entering Truck Wars.”
“Truck who?”
“It’s a contest. Five local crews are competing for a shot at winning their own truck in a month-long competition that Q109 is putting on. I’m really excited about it. I have a website and social media pages ready to go, along with a menu and a marketing plan.”
“Why are you doing this, Xia?” he whispers. The hurt and shock on his face would move me if it didn’t prove how long he hasn’t been listening to me.
“I already told you.”
“No. I refuse to believe that. Do you feel so slighted that you have to act out? Is this an attempt to get my attention? Because trust me, you have it now.”
“No. Does that even sound like something I would do?”
“Before today, I would’ve said no. But you, this,” he gestures to my outfit, “and this workplace relationship have me wondering what happened to my little girl.”
“She grew up and decided to stop trying so hard to please you because it only made her miserable.” I stand my ground.
“You were never treated badly!”
“I was treated differently,” I counter, refusing to give an inch.
“You are all very different people. Why would I treat you all the same?”
“This is not about personality. This is about archaic ideals and gender.”
“I didn’t want this for you. The ups and downs of trying to create a successful business. The instability and back breaking work. You’re my princess. Why do you want to crucify me for that?” he rants, bewildered.
“Because your princess grew up and decided to take care of herself. I am the dragon slayer, not the woman in the tower.”
Jaw set and chest heaving, he draws himself up to his full height. “I’m not pleased about this. I want you to know I don’t approve. I could talk until I’m blue in the face but I won’t. Instead, I’m going to leave before I blow up and say things I can’t take back. I know you’re looking for my blessing, but I can’t give it right now. You’re leaving a steady job for an up and coming truck to chase a pipe dream.”
“What’s life for if not to live?”
I beg him to understand with my eyes. This is why he set off on his own and left Texas. How can he not understand me? We should be bonding over this.
“I get you have to do what you feel is best, I do. I don’t agree.”
“I wasn’t asking you to.”
He grimaces as if in pain before he turns on his heels and walks away.
“Well, I guess the mighty king has spoken.” My lower lip trembles and my vision blurs. It went exactly how I suspected it might, but it doesn’t make it any easier. Shayne wraps his arms around me, and I let go as I sob into his chest.
***
“You’re both so damn stubborn,” my mother says exasperatedly.
The outburst would be funny coming from the woman who so rarely swears or says an unkind word if the situation wasn’t so bleak.
“Are you actually going to place blame on me for this?”
“No, honey, I’m just stating a fact. My only wish was that you had done this earlier. I could sense you weren’t truly happy. I contributed to that with my silence. I regret that.”
I shake my head. “No, Mom. That’s on me, not you. I needed a wake-up call. Smoke II did that. I saw my years ticking down without any progression. Dad giving the boys a second truck was the last straw.”
She sighs. “I’ll work on him.”
I bite back the skeptical comments ready to dive off the tip of my tongue.
“You don’t think I have the power to change his mind?” she asks.
“I think if anyone does, it’s you. The problem is you shouldn’t have to. Seeing him walk out on me like that, when I need all the support I can get, changed the way I see him. We’re not puppets. We’re people with our desires and plans.”
“I know. He thinks he’s helping you.”
“By alienating me?” I snort.
“No, by guiding you toward what he truly feels is the right answer.”
“We live in a democracy, not a dictatorship.”
“He’s not used to being ignored. It’s my fault. I let him get away with too much over the years, and for that, I apologize. You came along with his personality and determination and turned him on his ear.” Shaking her head, she takes a sip of her rose hip tea. The tea house reminds me of my childhood. We’d slip away for high tea and girl time. It was always one of my favorite things to do.
I swirl my Earl Grey and nibble at a cucumber sandwich. The fresh taste explodes on my tongue as I chew and choose my words carefully. “Mom, this isn’t on you.”
“Yes, it is. I set the precedent for how things would go. I was too meek and accommodating, but he worked so hard to provide for us. It felt petty to complain or correct. The last thing I wanted to do was give him a hard time. It felt ungrateful.”
“Mom, you raised us. It’s not like you were sitting at home eating bonbons and watching daytime television. You played with us, taught us, supported every sport, music lesson, and dance class. Without you, this family would be in shambles. You have to know that.”
She glances away. “I worried that I failed you all somehow. I know I didn’t make up for his absence.”
Setting my teacup down, I reach over to grab her hand. “Mom, you’re an amazing woman. We are blessed to have you. You did the very best you could with a difficult situation. Dad loves his job and the limelight. He tried to balance both, but he couldn’t. You stayed behind with us. You could’ve traveled the world alongside him and hired a nanny.”
“The three of you are my precious jewels. All I truly wanted was to be a mother and raise a family. I never wanted all the perks that came with your father’s job. They were an added bonus that allowed me to create amazing memories with the people who mattered most.”
It’s refreshing seeing my mother speak on her point of view. She’s so soft spoken, Southern, and old-fashioned it’s rare to hear her speak an unkind word.
“I saw how he treated the three of you. It was normal for me. That’s how I was raised. I know it’s the twentieth century, but small towns in the South maintain that old way of thinking. I’ve seen how it’s gotten between you and your brothers the past few years. If I had spoken on it then, we might not be here.”
“And maybe we would,” I say, countering her comments.
“Regardless, I’ll see this set right. Now let’s talk about Shayne.”
I sigh. “I knew you were going to go there.”
“Well, of course, it’s been a long time since you had a steady beau. He’s certainly easy on the eyes.”
“I know it seems fast. The thing is, Shayne has been with me every step of the way. He doesn’t complain when I work long hours or get annoyed with my plans for the contest. When we do go out, we have so much fun. He’s always up for trying new things, and he gets me.”
“This sounds serious, baby.”
“It is. I wouldn’t have risked ruining the workplace for anything short of that.”
“What happens when it’s time for him to go home?” she asks quietly.
“I don’t know. We haven’t talked about it.”
“You need to before you get in any deeper. Make sure you’re both on the same page. Stalling will only make things harder.”
“Mom, I don’t think I could handle anything else right now.”
“After your contest then.” She gives me the stern gaze that would stop me in my tracks as a child.
“I’ll do it then.”
“Good. Now tell me all about this contest! How can I help?”
The conversation turns to lighter things, and I can almost forget about the uncertainty nagging me.
***
Shayne
I study Xia over the rim of my mug as we finish up breakfast. The melancholy mode that clings to her persistently shows in her eyes for a moment before she forces a smile. The curtain lowers, and I’m left with the false store front she’s pitching to everyone else. A twinge of irritation runs through me.
“Don’t do that. Hide from me.”
She blinks rapidly, and her eyes turn glassy.
“It’s his loss, Xi. One day he’s going to look back on this and realize he missed out. The regret will be his.”
“I get that. I do. Logically the ball is in his court. But emotionally it feels so wrong to be closing in on my dream and have him be absent. I knew he might be upset with me over taking a leap of faith. But I didn’t expect him to shun me.” Her voice shakes.
Anger pools in my belly hot and stifling. The urge to make her father feel a fraction of what she’s experiencing is strong. I’m not used to playing the politically correct role. Another drawback to the civilian lifestyle.
“You still have the rest of your family firmly in your corner. Their support is huge.”
“It is.”
I spent a lifetime working to please my old man. I’ll be damned if I allow her to make the same mistake. “I know it hurts, but the line you’re drawing is an important one for both of you. You have to discern how much you can bend before you break, or you’ll end up with a lifetime worth of regret that will haunt you.”
“Shayne?” she whispers.
I glance away, unable to look at her. What would she say if she knew I was a once a rampant racist?
“My father wasn’t a nice man, and not too long ago I spent all of my time and energy emulating him, losing myself, becoming an unrecognizable asshole. I was a vapid excuse for a human being, so used to following orders, I couldn’t think for myself.”
She flinches. “Shayne, don’t—”
“No. it’s not a defendable offense, Trust me.” I ball my fists. The truth is on the tip of my tongue, burning a hole through the pink muscle. “That’s why I can’t sit here and watch you doubt yourself or your decisions. It’s a slippery slope living under someone else’s standards.”
“What did he do to you?” she whispers.
“Turned me into a fucking monster.”
She gasps. “Jesus. What—”
“Don’t,” I say sharper than I intended.
She jerks back.
“Don’t ask me that unless you’re prepared to hear the answer.”
She licks her lips. “After the contest.”
“Yes, we’ll talk then.” Her lower lip trembles. Moving closer, I cup the back of her neck. “Enough of that. You have to be off to work soon, and I can’t let you leave like this.”
She sniffs. “You’re right. I don’t want to ruin your day with your uncles either.”
“Don’t worry about me. I’m fine.”
“I wish I could be there with you to meet them.”
“Me too. It was last minute though. We’re all a bit nomadic that way. We can never resist a chance for a ride on the bike.”
“All of you have them?”
“It’s pretty much a birth right.”
“Huh. That’s unique.”
I snicker. “That’s a good word to describe my family.”
“They aren’t like your father?”
“No. Every family has its broken branch, my old man happened to be a particularly gnarled and twisted one.”
I see the concern in her gaze. “I’m good. You go kick ass at work, and I’ll clear my mind with the ride to my uncles.”
As far as she knows I’m spending my day with family, which isn’t a total lie. I wish it was for pleasure. The ruling on the presidency is coming down the pipeline, and it’s all hands on deck. Big Mike has never been the type of guy to accept defeat. A great quality to have when you’re leading. A dangerous one when you’re being ousted from a position of power. He has a few loyal, hot-headed brothers we anticipate will pop off as well.
“Give me something sweet before you leave.”
She smirks. “You want me to get some of the candy we have left over from Sweet Hollywood?”
“Shut it.”
She leans closer, and I devour her lips. She tastes like coffee and sweetness. I can’t get enough. I tilt my head, deepening the kiss as I circle her tongue with my own. Pulling back, I kiss her forehead. “If we keep it up, you’ll be late.”
“You’re right.”
I walk her to the door, marveling at the lessons she’s taught me without knowing it.
***
The club is deserted when I pull into the parking lot. No one gets up here earlier than they have to, and the clock is just hitting eight. Working a nine-to-five, torture for night owls. After parking, I knock on the door, and a groggy looking prospect answers. He steps back, blinking his bloodshot eyes, and I walk in and see Knuckles at the bar with a bottle of whiskey.
“You know it’s bad when you’re awake and drinking before noon,” I say as I approach.
“I appreciate you coming in.”
“I do what the powers that be tell me to. You know how it is.”
He laughs. “Yeah, I’m about to be up close and personal with it.”
“Stone here already?” I ask.
He nods. “He got in last night. I caught him taking a cup of coffee into his dorm room a little bit ago.” Sighing, he hangs his head. “I never imagined it would come to this. Mike taught me everything I know. He was a good, solid leader for a long time.”
“We know better than anyone, nothing lasts forever,” I say.
“Ain’t that the truth.” The gravelly bass gets me on my feet. I turn and see Stone walking toward me. He’s still larger than life despite the silver streaks starting to thread through his hair. Barrel chested, muscular, and cunning, he’s always held my respect.
He pulls me into a hug and pats my back. “It’s good to see you, brother. Take a walk with me.” I follow him toward the office.
“I figured now would be a good time to get an update since I’m in town.”
“I didn’t realize you planned to be here when you first told me.”
“Last minute decision. I want to make sure this is handled properly. We’ve been gathering intel for some time. I think we got a handle on the ones who can’t get with the new program. I know it’s a change from the founding fathers’ concepts, but this is a new world, and we have to adapt or die.”
“I think the newer generation understands and respects that. I know I do.”
“Yeah? How’s that shadowing job going?”
“Real good. I’m actually helping train a few new people now. I had something I wanted to talk to you about, though.”
He strokes his chin. “Should I be worried?”
“Naw, it’s small. Remember the woman I was telling you about? Xia?”
“The boss’s daughter?” He narrows his gaze.
“Yeah her. Well, shit’s gotten a lot more serious, and I need permission to tell her about K.O.C.”
“You thinking about making her an Old Lady or something?”
“Maybe. I want the option, and I can’t do that while she remains in the dark.”
He smirks. “Told you it came on fast. You think she can hold water? ’Cause you need to be sure she’s not going to jeopardize anything we’ve got going on.”
“She’s trustworthy. That’s not what I’m unsure of.”
“Run it by me then.”
“She doesn’t know about my past yet.”
“Why do you have to tell her at all? None of us are saints. If she can handle the M.C. issue, that shouldn’t be a problem.”
“I might agree with that, except she’s black.”
His eyes bulge. “Damn.”
“Yeah.” I rub the back of my neck sheepishly.
His gaze narrows. “How long have you two been together?”
“’Bout six months now?”
He whistles. “Long time to keep something like this under wraps. You got a hole six feet deep to pull yourself out of.”
I bow my head. “I know.”
“Make sure she’s worth it.”
“Her being worth it isn’t the problem.”
“How long are you going to crucify yourself for mistakes? If you don’t move past them, your father wins. He’s controlling you from beyond the grave. I’ve noticed the changes. You’re withdrawn and despondent. Do I need to be worrying about you? You get too soft, you get distracted and maybe even start thinking the grass might be greener on the other side.”
Unsure what to say, I remain silent.
“We’ve all been there. You can love the life, but not be in love with everything that comes with it. If this is for you, it’ll pass. If it continues, you need to figure out your next move. Why do you think I sent you down here for this?”
“Because I volunteered and I’m good with people?” I ask tentatively.
“Partially. You also needed a change of pace, some fresh air, and time away from us to get your priorities in order. What I want to know is, if you’ve done that.”
“I’m still working on it,” I say honestly.
“When you come back I want you committed with your head in the game. You can’t be half in and half out.”
“I understand.”
“Good. You have my permission to tell your woman whatever you need to. But I’m holding you responsible for what she does with that information.”
“I’ll be sure she keeps everything to herself.”
“I believe you. Now I need to get a refill. It’s going to be a long day.”
A few hours later we’re all seated at the thick wooden table in church.
“So that’s it? After fifteen years of my life, I’m out because I don’t agree with the direction you’re going in?” Mike snarls.
“The only thing keeping me from putting a bullet in your brain it those years. You were warned. You did fuck all to enforce the rules I laid out, Wizard enforced, and a good majority of the brothers here followed. You figured once Wizard came back home you could go back. You should’ve known better. I don’t do loose ends.”
“You’re going to find getting me out of here more difficult than you thought. You’re not the only one who takes notice of things.”
“You threatening him?” Wizard growls.
The sound of shouting comes through the walls.
“What the hell is going out there?” Knuckles barks.
“A challenge of power.”
Chairs tumble to the ground behind us as we jump to our feet and open the door to a rapidly growing bar fight. Chairs, swears, and fists fly as brother turns against brother.
The sound of flesh meeting flesh draws my attention. My jaw drops as Stone lays into Big like he’s Rocky Balboa. A bottle shatters near my head. I jump. I’m shoved as the fight expands, and I raise my hands, ready to defend myself. My head jerks back as a punch is delivered. The blood rushes in my ears, and I respond with two punches to the gut of Mutt, a known Big lackey. He steps back, and I follow him with a one-two combo. His counter punch to my side makes me grunt.
Pain explodes in my head. I stumble. Liquid runs down the side of my face. I reach up to the back of my head, and my hands come away with blood. My head pounds and my stomach sours.