Chapter Seven
Xia
“I have exactly what you need.” Looking up from the carton of cookie dough ice cream I’m murdering, I stare at Jasmine. I love her optimistic attitude, but right now I’m not ready to be cheered up. She waves a white piece of paper like she’s in the front row of church with no air conditioner.
I grunt and shovel another ridiculous spoonful into my mouth. I’m not in the mood for cheering up. I feel like a bird with a broken wing, unable to fly and in desperate need of healing. The mucus and crying have upset my stomach, and irritation and lack of sleep have my eyes feeling like theirs glass in my retinas.
I focus my attention on picking out the big chunks of chocolaty goodness. The explosion of yumminess perks me up. Professor Lupin was right. Chocolate does make you feel better. Who knew it works for Dementors and professors.
“Xi.”
“Wha? I’m listening,” I say around a mouthful of melting happiness.
“I know you’re disappointed right now.”
I swallow. “That doesn’t even begin to cover it. My hand was played too soon. Ellis knows I’m looking for a way out. Now he’s hired help, that I’m training, and I feel like my neck is on the chopping block. I feel like a turtle flipped on its shell and unable to find balance. I can put everything on the line, finance myself and hope I make enough back to launch properly, or continue the same way I always have working and trying to save. Except, I’ve screwed up the work environment. The air in there is a thick as molasses. I’m always waiting for my world to explode.” I shake my head.
I feel empty. The loan didn’t go through. The longer I went with no word, the more I hoped for good news, now I’m in a weird limbo. I finished out my week with the boys and sank into a depression.
“I think there’s a reason this happened.”
I snicker. “Really? Are we still sticking with that universe has a plan line? ‘’Cause at this point I’m starting to wonder if God is telling me my father was right and I need to stay my behind right where I’m at.”
“I know you’re still reeling from the loan. I’m not trying to trivialize that. All I ask is that you look at this.” She flaps the paper again. “If you still feel the same way, I’ll yield. We’ll spend the rest of the weekend treating this like a breakup weekend.”
Unless that’s a letter from Ed McMann telling me he’s got a Publisher Clearing house check, I don’t see what difference it’ll make.
“Once I do, will you chill on the put-on-a-happy-face rhetoric?”
“I will until Monday.”
I nod my head. “Deal.” I don’t want to wallow in sorrow like a pig in the mud. I just need time to digest and regroup.
“Fine.” After stabbing my spoon into the ice cream, I hold out my hand and take the paper.
“Congratulations, Magical Munchies has been chosen to compete on Food Truck Wars?” I read the words out loud as I skim the email. “This says Magical Munchies has been accepted. I’ve never even heard of it before.”
“It’s a local contest being put on by Q109. Local teams go head to head for a month to compete for a chance at winning their own truck. When I heard about it nearly six months ago, I knew I had to enter you. I’d nearly forgotten about it, and then this came to the email we set up for the Magical Munchies website.”
Floored, I sit up straight on the couch. I’m being pummeled by a million emotions all headed in different directions. Choppy and slow, my brain glitches like a video being played on a server with crappy WIFI. It’s not over yet.
“You willful, meddling, amazing monster,” I whisper.
She cringes. “On a scale of one to ten, how angry are you at me?”
“How could I be mad?”
“I know this was pushing things, but damn it, you deserve this.”
“What do I need to do?”
“Sign the paper and send it back, and plan your final menu. We need to be prepared to slay this.”
My head spins. “Can we get everything together in time?”
“It already is. You have the social media sites set up, the shirts, the swag, and the family name. You’ll need to talk to your brothers though. You need a place to do a trial run for your recipes.”
She’s right. Going in blind would be setting myself up for failure. My hands shake. I can’t pass this up, but I’ll be throwing down the gauntlet. The minute my name is thrown into the ring, my family’s phones will ring off the hook. The downside of being connected in the industry—every move you make is noticed.
“I have to do this.”
“Yes, you do.” Jas grabs my hand and squeezes.
“Let’s look over the rules.”
My second wind hits as I grab the opportunity in front of me with both hands and vow to aim for the moon. I scan over the rules. They’ll provide the truck. If you’re chosen, each team gets a week to sell and accomplish tasks. It’s all about who makes the bigger profit and the biggest splash across social media. It’s a lot of money to invest, and they’ll want to be sure. I lace my fingers and push them forward, cracking my knuckles.
“Get me a pen.”
“There she is,” Jas whispers. “The woman, my best friend, has given herself permission to be.”
I smile up at her. “Let’s do this.” We fire up our laptops and begin to spread the word. Within thirty minutes, the news is out on every social media venue I have. The pandering for votes has begun. Leaning back, I watch the shared numbers rocket. It’s a matter of time until this gets back to my family. I might be the one in charge of marketing, but they’re not completely disconnected. I’ve made a move that will launch World War III. Consequences be damned.
“I need to go see Ellis in person, which means I should probably change out of my pajamas.”
She laughs. “Yeah, it might help.”
“I can’t believe this is happening.”
“I can. This is going to be your year.”
“God, I hope so, Jas. You don’t have to hang around.”
“I don’t mind. I planned to be here all day, but now I’m sending you off with a pep talk.”
“I won’t be long. I don’t want to lose my nerve.” I dress in preparation for battle. The ripped black jeans and white T-shirt topped with a cropped leather biker vest are my armor. I choose my favorite bracelets for luck and black booties with a jewel studded heel for extra confidence and height.
I sink onto the vanity and study myself in the mirror. Despite recent stressful situations, I’m happier. I feel alive. Before I merely existed, stealing moments at a time where I truly lived. It was a half-life, a walking dream I couldn’t wake up from. This is better. Not easier, but worth it in the long run. I darken and sculpt my eyebrow with a brown pencil and move on to the foundation, choosing my colors carefully. I want to look untouchable, flawless, and fierce.
I use a golden highlighter, black eyeliner, and black lipstick. I feel like an Amazon warrior with a fierce glow, sharp cheekbones, and full lips. The woman staring back at me in the mirror is one to be reckoned with. I rise and make my way back into the living room.
“Feeling better? Because you look amazing.”
“Thanks, Jas. I’m done with the self-pity. Thank you for allowing me the time to work through it though.”
“I think a few days of sadness are entitled when a major plan falls through. Now you’re on to bigger and better things.”
I hook my arm in hers. “Shall we?”
“Why thank you, I think we should.” We exit the apartment, and I lock up. “How do you think he’ll take it?” she asks.
“I’m not even going to try to guess. He’s done all kinds of things I wouldn’t expect from him these past couple of weeks.”
“Good or bad?”
My brow furrows. “I can’t tell. Hiring more people would be the logical thing to do if you know you might lose one of your staff members.”
“This is true. You think he did it to be vindictive?”
“I want to say no.”
“I think you’re being paranoid. She shrugs. “I mean, he hasn’t told anyone else, right?”
“Not that we know of.”
“Trust me, your dad would’ve said something by now, and Casp has never been stealthy.”
“You’re right. Do you think I have a real shot at this?”
“Are you kidding me? You’re going to be the one to watch. You’re more than the face for Fresco or Smoke. You’re Xia Foley. The smart, funny girl who keeps them all in the loop and entertains them. You’ve built your own following. Think of Alton Brown. It’s his personality, flair, and knowledge that makes him so incredible. Not his actual skill. Half the time he outshines the cooks on his show. You may not realize it, but you have that. It’s why you’re so relatable to everyone.”
“Alton Brown is interesting. Me, not so much.”
“You’re an alternative black girl with green hair who wants to run her own unicorn themed food truck. You’re plenty interesting. You’re the Foley evolution, my friend. Your brothers follow in the footsteps of your father. In comparison, you are as different as it gets. The things you’ve got planned. The unique themes and cosplay specials are the ultimate blend of good food and pop culture. The folks in this town are going to eat it up.”
“Do you think so? I just figured it makes sense to incorporate the things I love in some way. I mean I’d have killed for a butter beer truck. Of course, I can’t call it that. But a Wizards’ food truck that appears every now and then with specialty drinks and meals. How could I not?”
“This is exactly why you’re going to succeed. You bring a new perspective to a crowded market.”
“Thank you for always believing in me. You keep my dreams going even when I can’t believe for myself.”
She smiles at me. “That’s what I’m here for.”
We reach my car and hug. “Wish me luck.”
“Luck.”
I linger outside the boys’ home. Now it’s my turn to show up unexpected late at night. I lucked out; Casp isn’t even at home. Stepping out, I make my way up the driveway. I ring the doorbell and wait.
The light turns on, and the door opens. Ellis blinks. “Holy crap … Xia?”
I hold out my arms and curtsey. “The one and only.”
“You look so different.”
“Is that a bad thing?”
“Huh? No, I just … I’m so used to seeing you in our uniform. I forget my baby sister is all grown up. I figured you were playing hooky today.” He steps back. “Come on in.”
“Trust me, you wouldn’t have wanted me there today. I was a mess. I didn’t get the loan. Go ahead and gloat.”
Frowning, he scrubs a hand over his face. “Xi, don’t be like that. I’m not happy that the loan didn’t go through. I don’t take pleasure in your sadness. That you think I would, tells me things are seriously off with us. I took your suggestion to heart. Casp and I have been acting like entitled, spoiled dicks. I get that. I failed at my big brother gig, and for that I’m sorry. I’ve always viewed you and Casp as mine. That comes with the age difference. When you were first born, I called you my baby. I’m sorry we’ve gotten so far away from that.”
“Did you really do that?”
He chuckles. “Oh yeah. I was proud and possessive. You’ve heard mom tell the stories.”
“Yeah, but I wasn’t sure if you remembered it.”
“I was almost five when you came alone, I absolutely remember.”
His words warm me as I follow him inside, taking note of his black T-shirt and plaid pajamas pants. “Are you dressed for bed?”
“It’s been long days lately. Come on, let’s go to the kitchen. I’ll make you hot cocoa just the way you like it.”
“And a snack?” I ask hopefully. My brother is no slouch when it comes to baking.
He smiles.“And a snack. I have fresh spice cake.”
I climb onto the stool, and he busies himself preparing our snacks. I’m brought back to school days. He always made us snacks when we got home if Mom wasn’t there.
“Casp and I bought into all the hype and got really self-centered. You going after the loan and telling me about myself grounded me. I’ve been thinking about the way things run in our family. I haven’t liked everything, so I’m changing what I can.”
“But what about Mandy?”
“I hired her to ease the transition period when you got your loan or give you more time to go after your own goals if you didn’t.”
I misjudged him. “Ellis,” I whisper, ashamed.
“An apology can never make up for the past few years, but I can promise to be your ally.”
“Why the change of heart?”
“I never realized we were the ones holding you back. You were always there helping, planning, and inventing new ways to forward Smoke. Sure, you’d mentioned wanting your own truck, but you never made moves toward it. I figured you were too timid to run a truck on your own. It takes boldness and aggression to get a business going and maintain it. Those aren’t qualities I felt like you had an abundance of.”
“How could I ever have a chance to develop that when how I should be was constantly shoved down my throat? I was trapped by societal conventions and parental expectation. You two were a victim of the same. Only it worked in your favor.” I take a healthy bite of the slice of cake he plated for me and turn to face him.
He takes a sip of his drink. “Hmm. In some ways.”
The sadness in his voice struck me. “What do you mean?”
“I think we’ve all felt the relentless crush of being held up to the standards of Chef Richard Foley. Everything he’s touched turned to gold, so why wouldn’t he expect the same of us? I mean, did we ever get a moment to think about what we might like or were we simply pushed into the family business? I like what I do, but there were other things I wanted to explore and didn’t.”
“Like what?” I ask, fascinated by this new side of Ellis I’m discovering.
“Baking. I love to bake and decorate more than I ever dared let on. Cake, pastries, and dessert are my jam. Yes, I’m lucky enough to cook well, but it doesn’t feed my soul. I love running Smoke with Casp, but I do wonder what if often.”
“Ellis, why didn’t you go to school for baking?” I say stunned by his revelation.
“You have your crosses to bear, and I have mine. I wanted Dad to be proud. As the eldest, I’ve always been expected to continue the legacy in some way. For me, the food truck was an escape. It allowed me to avoid culinary school. It’s not where my heart lies.”
“Ellis, that really sucks.” I know the pain of hiding the important bits and pieces of yourself away.
“I admire you, little sister. For going after your dreams. Perhaps after I get things settled with the new food truck, I’ll do the same.”
“So you’re behind me on this?”
“One-hundred percent. I’m sure Casp will be, too. As the middle child, I think he’s gotten the best gig. Seems to me he floats around blissfully unaware of things.”
“He’s got the bug like Dad. As long as he’s cooking and creating he’s fine. I would’ve been more stunned if he hadn’t done to culinary school,” I say.
“It’s true. I think that’s why it didn’t bother Dad that I went to school for finances and customer service. Casp has always been a mini him when it comes to food,” Ellis replies with a shrug.
“Since you’re down with this … would you be willing to let me borrow your truck?”
“What’s going on?”
“So, Jas signed me up to be on Truck Wars.”
“Truck what?”
“Q109 is running a competition where teams compete with different tasks for a chance to win their own truck. I’m chosen as one of the five teams,” I reply.
“Damn! Go, Xi. Why do you need the truck?”
It feels good to speak to him openly and get his take on things.
“I need to perfect my menu.”
“As long as you have it ready to go in the morning, you can knock yourself out.”
Setting my mug down, I throw myself at him. He wraps his arms around me and kisses the top of my head. “I love you, Xi. I want to see you happy. I’m sorry I ever made you feel otherwise. Whatever you need to kick ass in the competition, I got your back.”
I sniff. “I love you, too.”
He pulls back. “Now let’s talk about this thing with Shayne.”
I laugh. New beginnings are sprouting up everywhere like spring flowers. Having him at my back when I know Dad is going to hit the roof is a blessing I never saw coming. It means I’m no long completely alone against him.
“Promise you’ll help me break this to Dad, and I’ll talk about Shayne and I.”
‘You drive a hard bargain, but I’m willing to risk it. No more going it alone … okay, short stuff?”
“Okay.” I snuggle into his chest. I always looked up to my big brother. Regaining our closeness is important to me.
***
Shayne
“Holy Honeydukes,” Xia whispers, referencing the candy shop from Harry Potter. I smile pleased. I made the right choice. Sweet Hollywood is the best candy shop in the area, and some would argue the country or the world. I’d skimmed over the reviews, but we’re here for the make your own candy option. We step inside, and my eyes are immediately assaulted by bright colors. Encased in uniquely shaped glass containers, themed displays, and art, candy surrounds me on every side. The inner child in me awakes from a long slumber.
This store has controlled chaos down. The areas are separated by smartly themed sections.
“You’re officially my favorite person,”
“Oh, was candy all it took?”
“Other things are involved, but that did play a part in my final decision.”
Wrapping my arm around her waist, I pull her to me. “You haven’t heard the best part yet. We get to build our own candy bar. That’s what brought me here. I had no clue it was going to be a universe all in itself.”
“You know we’re not leaving here any time soon, right?” she asks, wide-eyed.
“Oh, I came fully prepared to spend all night. You get your sugar fix now, and I’ll get mine later. I’ve got a craving only you can help me with.” I wink.
“You want me to cook for you?” she says innocently.
I bend down, brushing her ear with my lips. “What I want is to bring you to the edge over and over until you beg me to let you come.”
She shivers, and I pull back. She catches my collar and pulls me in for a sweet kiss that only leaves us both longing for more. “Later. Where do you want to go first?”
“You get first pick.”
My eyes return to the red car in the middle of the shop.
“I do want to figure out why they have a Ferrari in the middle of the store.”
“Let’s investigate.” I take her hand, twining our fingers, linking us. Every moment with her feels like a gift. Seeing the brothers popped my bubble. I forgot myself. This time is temporary unless I decide to leave my world behind. I’m no closer to making a call on that.
“It’s a gumball machine!”
Her words pull me back into the present. There are tracks winding their way around and into the car.
“You race them,” a worker says politely. “The starting point is just over there.”
Without warning, Xia drops my hand and power walks toward the start.
“Cheater.” I overtake her, easily lifting her off the ground as she laughs. I missed that sound. The rejection of her loan request took her legs out from under her, but the acceptance to the contest gave her wings. In this place, I’m a twelve-year-old boy on his first date. We race behind our blue and pink gumballs, following them around the curves. In the end, she wins, cheering as we collect the gum and pop them in our mouths. The outside world disappears as we immerse ourselves in the sugar coated drug of her choice.
I like sweets, but it’s her happiness I’m addicted to. I never realized how much you gained from caring for a woman deeply. All the things I once did to get into some girls pants is taking on new meaning. We wander through the M&M’s and Jelly Belly’s section before we end up in the Yucky Department.
“So gross,” she whispers, peering up at the flashing light sign depicting a person getting sick.
“No, this is awesome.” Mock urinals and candy-coated bugs and worms deliver on the disgustingly delicious tagline on the wall. “I would’ve killed for this when I was growing up. It’s a dream come true. The most disgusting candy one could think of. It’s everything I never knew I was waiting my whole life to find.”
She holds up a red rectangular box. “Okay, I’ve heard of chocolate-covered crickets, but worms?” She wrinkles her nose, and I chuckle.
“This is the first time I’ve seen you be super girly.”
“Well as the only girl, I’m not squeamish about too much.”
“Feeling like a game of truth or dare?” I ask.
“My candy love only extends so far.”
I grab a few boxes of crickets. “I’m sending this to my brother. He’ll get a kick out of them.”
“Who says boys ever really grow up?”
“What? You didn’t want to follow Peter Pan to Neverland at some point?” I ask.
She rolls her eyes. “No, because there were no lost girls. I thought of being Tiger Lily a time or two. I definitely played a game of pretend with Ellis and Casp.”
“I’m glad you talked things out with him.”
“I am, too. Family is important. Our talk the other day reminded me of that. I hadn’t realized the resentment I was holding on to was eating away at our bond. I had it in my head that he had a perfect life. I was so wrong.”
“We get used to believing the imagery everyone works so hard to portray.”
“Sad that things have become that way. We’re all empty on the inside with pretty exteriors.”
“That’s why fitting in is the biggest lie there is. That’s one of the few things I’m grateful my father taught me.”
We browse through Tinsel Town and Route 66 where they feature older candies. She selects a few for her parents, and I try to imagine her upbringing. What would it be like to have the two loving parents? It’s a rarity in the club. Like finding a unicorn. After an extended stay in the Marshmallow Room, we head to the Chocolate Lab.
“You’re going to spoil me if you keep this up,” she says as we wait for our chocolate bars to be wrapped.
“What? Feeding you candy?” I lift an eyebrow.
“Being such a good boyfriend. You get me. I haven’t allowed myself to be understood in a long time.”
“Good. That means you’ll remain by my side where you belong.”
I wish I was half the man she thinks I am. It’d make everything a hell of a lot easier. How am I ever going to let you go? I admire her open face. There’s no pretense. There’s a purity in that. An innocence I lost long before I understood how priceless and fleeting it was.
“What are you thinking about?”
How much I don’t want to lose you. “How different life here in L.A. is proving to be.”
“Is that a good thing or a bad one?”
It’s a question I can’t answer for myself.
“Anything with you is good, Xi.” You have to find a way to make her stay, the desperate voice inside of me demands. Bind her to you. Make her need you enough to stay. I’m a master manipulator. It’s part of my charm and upbringing, but I can’t bring myself to use any of those skills on Xia. Having her means making hard choices I’m not sure I’m ready for. Leaving K.O.C., or bringing her into the life. Both choices come with huge risks and a high chance of failure.
If I was naïve, I could see her running a truck for K.O.C. I can’t introduce her when I don’t know how I feel about the club. It’s a hard life with big demands. It’s the only life I’ve known, and it’s nearly torn my soul to shreds. Like that’s the worst thing I have to tell her. The day is suddenly marred by the black mark on my past. I continue to go through the emotions as my chest gets tight. It’s like being a former Death Eater and never telling your spouse. Jesus, she has me referencing Harry Potter. I have to tell her. And I will … soon. I won’t jeopardize her future now by distracting her at such an important time in her life. She needs backup.
Later, after the contest, I’ll come clean completely. If I can get Stone’s permission. The web of deceit is getting stickier by the second.
***
“I didn’t think this could get any tastier, but you’re proving me wrong.” I drizzle the melted milk chocolate around her breasts and down the valley between them. Bending down, I lap at the path I created. “So sweet, inside and out.”
“I-I thought I was the one with the sweet tooth,” she says shakily.
I flick her stiff nipples with my tongue, and she moans. “What can I say? You’ve converted me.” I bite her peak gently, and she arches her back, coming off the bed as she rubs her thighs together. I circle her mounds, as the chocolate melts on my tongue and the flavor of her skin fills my mouth. It’s intoxicating. Once she’s clean, I grip her breast, sucking and massaging as she writhes beneath me.
“I could make you come like this.”
She whimpers. “Yes.”
“I won’t.” She groans. “But I could.” I kiss my way down her sternum to her belly, circling her belly button. I dip my tongue inside. She shivers, and I trail my fingertips down her thighs. Bumps raise on her skin. Sensitive to a light touch, she’s easy to tease. I nip my way down to her belly.
“Open for me.” She parts her legs, and I run my fingers down her inner thighs, massaging as I admire her glistening lips. I brush my thumb over her clit.
“Shayne.”
“It’s like music when you cry out for me.” I slip two fingers inside and slowly stroke her walls. Fisting the sheets, she digs her heels into the bed as she pushes up.
“Ah ah.” I pause in mid-stroke. “You take what I give you, greedy girl.”
A whimper spills from her kiss swollen lips.
She stills her thrusts, and I resume my motion. I stroke her with my other hand while I pump her with my fingers. A fine tremor shakes her body, and her breath comes in small pants. I like seeing the woman who runs the show during the day out of control and ready for the pleasure I can bring her. Her walls constrict, and I moan.
“I think I have something better for you than my fingers.”