Chapter 12
Sarah
“Dinner wasn’t so bad, was it?” I asked Garrett as he stood next to me and helped me clean up the kitchen.
“It was nice.”
“I thought my father was going to totally convert you into a NASCAR fan.”
It had been wonderful to watch how excited my father got while talking to Garrett. I knew he had wanted a son and over the years I had tried to make him proud. He certainly didn’t make me feel like he didn’t want me, I just knew he always longed to have another man around the house that he could bond with.
As Garrett and I had gotten closer, Garrett was afraid my father would find out, but I actually thought my father wouldn’t mind at all. Garrett was a good man; he was one of the nicest men I had known. My father and he got along great and I saw how my father looked at him; he respected Garrett.
Sure, my father teased Garrett about staying away from me, but that was just what he did. If I told him I was head over heels falling for Garrett; he would be happy for me. I just didn’t fall head over heels for anyone so it would shock my parents if I actually admitted to them the feelings I was having.
When Garrett told me my parents had invited him to dinner, I couldn’t help but think it would be the perfect moment to tell them about the two of us. Just get it all out there on the table and not worry about it. They were my parents, they loved me and trusted me, and I just didn’t think they would have a problem with the two of us being together.
But I wasn’t going to force the announcement and it made Garrett very anxious to think about my father knowing what we were doing, so I didn’t tell them. I did enjoy our evening together though. It was so much fun to watch my father and Garrett talked about NASCAR and to hang out with my mother in the kitchen and make dinner. It felt like how I had always wished my significant other would get along with my parents.
Garrett wasn’t exactly my boyfriend; I wasn’t sure what label we should attach to our relationship. We worked together and hung out together during the day and in the nighttime, we made love and slept together. Outside of the ranch I would have considered him my boyfriend, but on the ranch, it seemed like something less than that. There was no future-planning going on between the two of us. We never mentioned living together or traveling the world; we just enjoyed the time we had with each other. No expectations and no plans.
“It was pretty exciting there in the end. I can see why he likes it so much. I hope your mom is all right with me kicking her out of the kitchen so I could help you with the dishes. I just wanted to talk to you. It was so weird sitting in there and not talking to you.”
“Yeah, I think she will survive.”
“You have a pretty cool family here.”
“Yeah, I love ‘em; I think I’ll keep them,” I laughed.
I didn’t know much about Garrett’s family except that his parents had died. He also mentions one time that his sister lived in Florida, but he didn’t really talk to her much. It was sad that his family was so small and he didn’t have the support I did. I could tell he longed for more close connections in his life and I hoped he would find it someday.
We continued to do the dishes and watched a storm off in the distance. It looked like it was building up some power and the closer it got to the ranch, I could see the trees blowing harder and harder in the wind. We didn’t get many storms in Montana, but when they did blow through, it was normally just some thunder and lightning. Luckily, we were far enough north that we didn’t get tornados or anything like that.
The animals always had a bit of a rough time when a thunderstorm rolled through. The lightning and noise from the thunder scared them and often had them so worked up they wouldn’t eat or drink for a day after the storm had passed.
“Hey, when you two are finished up in here will you go check on the horses. They might need some loving care to get through the storm,” my father said as he grabbed another beer from the fridge.
“Sure, Dad.”
I hated to watch how the scared the animals got in the storms. It was difficult to know they were afraid and not be able to calm them down in anyway. When I was away from the ranch I didn’t think anyone took as good of care of the horses as I did when I was home. Sure, my father and mother probably went out to the barn and checked on them; but there was so much more that went into making sure they felt safe. I didn’t mind even sleeping in the barn if I had to, just to make sure they all made it through the night all right and weren’t too scared.
“Of course, Mr. Miller,” Garrett said. “I bet Buckjoy will appreciate a little company once the thunder comes rolling through.”
I loved that Garrett got it. Right away, without hesitation, he knew that he horses would be scared. Garrett didn’t have a lot of experience, but he loved that horse and knew him well. Garrett had a big heart and that was just one of the things that I cherished about him.
“For God’s sake, kid, call me Sid,” my father grumbled under his breath as he went back into the living room.
“Sorry,” Garrett said with a strained face.
“He’s a bit of a drinker at night. I know you wouldn’t be able to tell it from how he acts during the day.”
“Oh, he’s fine. I hope that I have a wife and daughter that I can annoy with my drinking someday.”
We finished up in the kitchen and found some raincoats and boots in the hall closet before we headed out to the barn. I couldn’t imagine Garrett ever getting drunk. The few times that we had drank while at his cabin, Garrett always maintained total control and didn’t even seem tipsy.
One time we shared an entire bottle of red wine and I felt like I could hardly walk afterward, yet he was straight sober. It made me think that he had probably drank quite a bit in his history and a high tolerance for alcohol.
“We will be back in when the storm passes,” I told my parents.
“I’ll be sleeping,” my father said grumpily.
“We are both heading to bed shortly. Don’t stay out there too long, you two,” my mother said as she hugged us both and sent us on our way. “Stay safe. That wind looks pretty exciting.”
The wind was blowing hard as we pressed our way through it and out to the barn. All ten of the horses were anxious and making a lot of noise in their stalls. It was normal for them to be afraid when a big storm hit and whenever I was able to, I liked to come sit with them and try and calm them down. I was glad we had gotten out there early enough to try and keep them calm; it was much better than trying to get them calmed down when all heck had broken lose in the barn.
Garrett went straight over to Buckjoy and started petting his mane and talking to him and I took the time to turn on more lights and flipped the radio on. It was soothing to have the normal noises around them like we had going on during the day. Plus, I knew the radio station would give out warnings if there were need to take shelter. Not that it happened often, but you just never knew.
“Wow, they sure are worked up,” Garrett said as he took his raincoat off and started to go into the stall with Buckjoy.
“Don’t go in there,” I stopped him. “If a big thunder strike happens, you’re likely to get a pair of hooves to your chest. It’s better to stay outside the stall.”
I admired Garrett for wanting to calm his horse down, but he didn’t understand the dangers that a horse like that posed. Buckjoy wouldn’t purposely hurt Garrett, I knew this. But the horse could easily get so scared that he reacted in a way that put Garrett in danger.
“Can I give him some apples?”
“Sure, that would be good. I’m sure they will all enjoy a little snack. I know I love to eat when I’m scared.”
“I’ll remember that when I take you to a scary movie some time.”
It was the first-time Garrett had mentioned taking me anywhere. Usually we just talked about our day and a little about our dreams for the future, but he never talked about wanting to have me with him in those dreams. I had decided not to push things though. I was happy having him with me at the ranch and I felt prepared for the day that he told me he was ready to move on. Certainly, I would have a few weeks to prepare myself and maybe we would even try to keep in touch. I really didn’t know what it would look like, but I liked the idea of going to a movie with him someday.
“I look forward to going to a movie with you.”
We were both about to hand one of the horses an apple when a loud crack of lightning struck near the barn. I looked up as I heard a nearby tree branch snap and expected to see it falling through the roof of the building since it sounded like it was so close.
“Shit!” Garrett screamed as he dropped his apple and grabbed me.
He pulled me into the corner of the building and we both stayed there as we waited to see if anything was going to happen. It was a scary moment and I was happy I had Garrett there with his arms around me. His quick action would have certain of saved me if that branch had come flying through the roof of the barn, but luckily it didn’t break through.
“I bet that did some damage to the roof,” I laughed nervously.
“Yep. Hopefully not too bad.”
The horses were even more worked up than before and the storm seemed to be revving up to deliver quit a punch that night. It was going to be a long night of trying to calm them down. As much as I wanted to stay in that corner and play with Garrett a little bit, I knew the horses needed our attention more than we needed to be making out.
If the horses got too worked up they were liable to start kicking and causing damage to the barn. But more importantly, they could cause injury to themselves. I had seen a horse kick right through the side of a building when he was afraid. The wood cut a major artery in his leg and he ended up bleeding out before my father or I were able to stop the bleeding. Ever since then I always made a habit of staying with them until they calmed down and made it through the storm all right; well, at least I did when I was home. When I wasn’t home, my father and mother did their best to calm the animals but I knew they didn’t stay out in the barn with them through the storm.
A good hour passed before the storm started to settle down and so did the horses. It was still raining pretty hard outside, but at least the worst of the lightning and thunder seemed to have passed. I looked over at Garrett and we both breathed a sigh of relief. The horses were still alert and moving around more than normal for that hour of the night, but I figured we were probably safe to make a run for our beds. Morning would be there before we knew it.
“I think I’ll stay out here and just make sure everything is all right until the storm totally passes,” Garrett said as he stood near Buckjoy.
“We could probably head in; I think the worst is over.”
As much as I worried about the horses, I was tired and desperate to get some sleep. Our night with my parents had left me totally exhausted.
“I know, but I just have a bad feeling. Why don’t we make ourselves a bed in the corner and campout?” Garrett suggested.
I wanted to say no to him. I was sleepy and just wanted to climb into bed and close my eyes, but the smile on his face was convincing me to stay with him. Plus, he was so enthusiastic and he thought it was a brilliant idea to campout in the horse barn. He obviously didn’t understand that field mice also loved to campout in the barn when it rained.
“I’m not sure I want little critters crawling all over me all night long,” I laughed.
“Hey, hey now. You said I was bigger than the average guy,” Garrett said as he thrust his hips playfully toward me.
“Oh, my God. Fine, I’ll stay out here with you, but I’m making us a better bed than a straw one.”
“Deal,” Garrett said as he turned back to petting Buckjoy and calming him. “I think I saw some blankets up the ladder in that loft area.”
“Blankets? Really? Why were you up in the loft? Hmmm…” I laughed.
The loft was old and rickety; I wouldn’t have considered going up there on any normal day. And I couldn’t imagine why Garrett would have gone up there. Perhaps he had been trying to find a spot to hide all his secrets.
“Yeah, why? Is it weird that there are blankets up there?”
“Sort of. I wonder who would have put them up there. I’ll go get them,” I said as I prepared myself to climb the old ladder.
I climbed up the rickety old ladder and found what looked like a makeshift bed. There were four, square bales of hay up there and a thick blanket over them. There was some hay filled in a sack as a pillow and a couple other blankets over the top. It was actually a pretty ingenious bed and for a moment I thought Garrett had been the one behind it. I had to laugh, but then I couldn’t help but wonder how the hell all the hay got up there. That ladder certainly wasn’t sturdy enough to hold a man carrying hay up it.
“How is it? Should I just come up there?” Garrett yelled as he stood at the bottom of the ladder.
“Did you do this?” I asked but then realized it had to be much older than when Garrett arrived. “We haven’t had square bales around here for at least ten years. I bet one of the old ranch hands made this place up and hid out here all day to avoid working,” I said almost under my breath.
“Sounds like a smart man,” Garrett said as he climbed up the ladder and joined me in admiring the makeshift bed. “Maybe I’ll use it as my secret napping area from now on.”
I knew Garrett was joking because he worked harder than I did. Garrett took pride in the work he did on the farm, as if he was part owner in the property or something. Neither my father or I ever had to tell Garrett to get things done, he naturally just worked. He always worked until late into the evening and seemed to be willing to work even longer than that if we needed him.
“Or maybe we can use it as our secret love nest,” I teased.
When I turned around Garrett was already taking off his shirt and looking at me with that familiar look that told me he was ready to take me. I loved that look in his eyes and I wasn’t opposed to having some fun in the hidden love nest we had found.
“Come here,” he beckoned me.
“Oh yes, sir,” I laughed as he pulled me close to him.
It was exciting to be in the barn during a thunderstorm. Garrett worked slowly and pulled off each piece of my clothing. He lingered on my raincoat buttons and licked his lips as he dropped the coat to the ground. Then he did the same thing as he worked to unbutton each of the buttons on my shirt. Before I knew it, we were both standing there naked with our skin pressed against each other and the cool breeze of the storm exciting us both.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and he lifted me up and gently set me back onto the makeshift bed. His eyes were locked with mine and I felt the love he had for me. Of course, I wouldn’t say the word love in front of Garrett, but I felt it and that was good enough for me. Nothing about our future together mattered to me in that moment, I was happy to have him there and delighted to be the woman who he was about to make love to.
Slowly he kissed down my body and my nipples hardened with the anticipation. There was a light breeze seeping through the rafters and it sent goose bumps throughout my body as well. The lights were still on down in the main barn, but it was just a glow of light up where we were. There was just enough light that I could see his face and watched him enjoying the taste of my body.
My heart was so full with Garrett there. He was a kind, hardworking man who treated me the way I had always wanted a man to treat me. It was like a fairytale, yet I knew it wouldn’t last forever. Never in all of my adult life had I thought I would be all right making love to a man that I knew I wouldn’t have a long-term relationship with. It just hadn’t been my thing, but there I was; enjoying every moment of my time with Garrett.
The thing that really surprised me was just how much I liked myself when I was with Garrett. I was nicer, happier, and enjoyed life so much more since I had met him. I could only hope I would be able to maintain this new view on life after Garrett decided it was time to move on. And secretly, I did have a tiny bit of hope that he would decide he liked it at the ranch and wanted to stick around. I knew it was wishful thinking and I didn’t care if it seemed illogical, I still held out hope.
If he did have to leave I hoped we would keep in touch. I hoped we would go on a real date to a movie someday. Perhaps even continue our romance long after he decided to leave the ranch, but I honestly was all right if we never got to move our relationship forward in that way. I was learning more about myself and my heart while I was with Garrett than I had learned in all my years as an adult. I knew that I deserved a man like him in my life, which was a huge lesson that had taken me many years to understand.
As Garrett’s lips moved up and down my body, I felt so relaxed. I felt his warmth as his lips touched my warmth and then quickly continued up my body. He thrust into me and I moaned out louder than I had expected. I surprised myself and instantly bit my bottom lip in an effort to prevent myself from making too much noise.
“Louder,” he beckoned me with a mischievous grin.
“I don’t want anyone to hear us,” I said.
“There’s a storm outside. If there was ever a time for some hot and noisy sex, it’s tonight.”
He was right, it was pouring down rain outside and we were in the loft of the barn. There was no way anyone would hear us up there. I got excited at the notion that I could scream out if I wanted to. There was something so naughty about the idea of being really noisy and not caring at all about it.
“Oh, you like it when I’m noisy?” I asked him.
“I fucking love it.”
“Game on,” I joked.
Garrett thrust hard into me and I delivered a loud scream that would have rivaled any porn star. It was a fake scream, just to tease him though. But instead of teasing him, my scream drew a powerful thrust from him. He really did like hearing my moans and thrust after thrust he delivered to me in an effort to make me scream louder and louder.
I liked pleasing him. In all of our time together, I liked that we could tell each other what we wanted to try and there was no judgment. We were having fun with each other and on that night, it was no different. Soon my moans weren’t fake at all. I was enjoying our rough sex and getting more turned on by the moment.
“Harder,” I moaned out as my fingers dug deep into his back.
His thrusts were pleasuring my body in a new way and it had me shaking with desire even before I had released in orgasm. I loved it. I held onto him as our thrusts shook the barn. It was a good thing there was a storm outside, or everyone on the ranch would have known just how much pleasure Garrett was giving to me.
“Yes,” he groaned deeply.
His eyes were closed and there were beads of sweat forming on his brow. He was enjoying himself just as much as I was. So, I closed my eyes and continued our little game of thrusting and screaming. It felt primal to thrust my hips against him and feel him deep inside of me.
I had had some rough sex with a boyfriend in my past, but it had just been an act. I wasn’t into it and he wasn’t good at it. But with Garrett, I felt a desire to have more and more from him. I loved watching his body as he put every effort into his thrusts. I wanted to see how much more he could give. How much harder he could thrust. I loved that we were experimenting and having fun with our night. It was certainly an evening I wouldn’t soon forget.
Over and over again he pressed into me and I moaned out. The storm outside was still causing plenty of noise so I stopped worrying about anyone hearing us. We were going to screw ourselves right into passing out from exhaustion and I treasured it.
“More,” I breathed as our bodies started to sweat and stick together. “I want more.”
Garrett opened his eyes for a moment to look into mine and then he leaned down to kiss me. His lips stayed on mine just for a moment and then he took a deep breath before delivering his final symphony of thrusts that finished both me and him off for the night. I felt the sweat dripping from his chest as my hands ran up and down him and encouraged his movements. I wanted him to know I was enjoying every last moment of our night together.
As Garrett collapsed next to me, my legs shook from the exertion. It was a good thing we had already decided to sleep in the barn, because there was no way I was going to make it down the ladder, my whole body was exhausted. I really didn’t know if I’d be able to make it down the ladder by morning, I hadn’t had that good of a workout in months.
“Now that was fun,” Garrett said as his sweat soaked body heaved up and down.
He took in some deep breaths as he tried to calm himself and I couldn’t help but lean my sweaty body up next to his. It was at that moment that I felt totally at peace. I didn’t feel judged by Garrett. I didn’t feel like he wanted anything more from me than I wanted to give him. There was no agenda between us, no worrying about who wanted something from the other person. We didn’t have friends or social circles that we had to worry about. There was nothing else to our relationship than just the two of us and it was a wonderful partnership so far.
“What time is it?” I asked as I looked at his watch.
“Two o’clock.”
I laughed at his watch and examined it a little bit. That watch was such a running joke between all the ranch hands that I couldn’t help but think about the new guy my father had finally hired.
“Didn’t my father finally hire a new guy this week?”
“Yes, some young kid who had been hitchhiking I think. It’s good to have some fresh blood. I think the guys were getting tired of shoveling horse crap.”
“Yeah, I couldn’t believe he went so long without hiring someone. We were getting pretty damn shorthanded. Have you all told him how to wake up in the mornings yet?”
“Oh, no way. They tortured me for weeks with that. I’m not going to give in that easily. He’s got at least another week of missing breakfast before we get him a watch.”
Because all of the ranch hands had the same joke pulled on them, it seemed like new hires had to spend longer and longer periods of time not knowing how to wake up. If it had been up to me, I’d have just put an alarm clock in the bunkhouse and been done with it, but my father said it was a bonding thing with the men and to stay out of it.
“You guys are so mean to each other. It’s a wonder you can keep any new hires at all.”
We both laughed as we cuddled up together and listened to the rain. I was joking with Garrett about the new hires. I knew that since Garrett had become the lead ranch hand we had actually kept almost all of the old workers. Our rate of men leaving had declined rapidly and I blamed it all on Garrett. He got along well with the men and they respected him. Garrett worked just as hard, or harder, than the other ranch hands and that gave them the perfect example of what to work towards.
When Garrett decided he wanted to leave, it would be a sad day for all of us. My father loved him, my mother adored him, and I was falling in love with him. He was a great leader to the other men and he did a really damn good job at running the ranch. If he did stay around I bet my father would eventually even give him a piece of land from the ranch so he could start his own family and ranch. Although, that didn’t seem like something that was in the future for Garrett.
“We aren’t mean to each other. It’s just how men are.”
“So men just like to keep other men from eating breakfast?” I laughed.
“No, we just like to make sure the men we are around understand who the boss is. That new kid will certainly understand his place in the pecking order by the time we get him his watch. I know I did.”
“Yeah, I remember when you first started. Wow, that seems so long ago.”
“I know,” Garrett said as he yawned. “But I’ve loved every minute of it.”
“Me too. I’m so glad I got fired and forced to move back home with my family. I mean, the sweat, hard work, no pay; it’s so much fun,” I joked.
“You love it and you know it. Don’t even pretend like you’re not happy here.”
“You’re right. I’m happier than I’ve ever been,” I said as I closed my eyes and cuddled close to Garrett.
As we fell asleep, I could tell the storm was calming down and I couldn’t wait until morning. We were likely going to have quiet the mess on our hands from broken tree limbs and other debris from the storm.