Chapter 19
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Andrew
She didn’t ask for any details about tonight. Perfect.
I’m guessing it’s not on her mind, just another piece of her life that she’s blocked out. Marybeth has steered clear of the topic all day, and Chase confirmed it’s not something she’s talked about or even acknowledged the past two years.
Marybeth and I had our birthday just a few days before Tessa showed up out of the blue. So that means today marks her twenty-second birthday. Mom and I have been working non-stop with last-minute preparations while Beth’s job was to keep her away from the house.
I cherish the returned memory of the day we first met the most. How her eyes lit up when I gave her that slice of birthday cake. Now I understand how much that simple act must have meant to her. My desire to make her smile has strengthened over the years. Hidden away in our castle, I would tell her a story or a joke, then hold my breath until her face lit up with joy and laughter.
A slice of cake and a book showed her time and time again there was someone who loved her, someone who truly saw her.
After my accident, the universe twisted and warped that day for her into something to be hated—forgotten. I know the bits and pieces Chase has been willing to share, which was not much.
Her birthday is going to be something I give back to her, the feeling of joy on a day that should be celebrated, not feared.
I’m going to give her back a piece of herself.
Stepping into my parent’s house, I find Mom right away, bustling around the kitchen. There’s half empty mixing bowls scattered everywhere and about eight different types of frosting and sprinkles on the counter. She’s covered in a thin film of flour, humming to herself as she works. Spotting me, she waves her spatula in a “hello” before returning her attention to the baking disaster laid out before her.
Walking further into the house, I see Dad outside setting up the backyard. I join him, and we work side by side in silence for a few peaceful moments.
“Lot of work to put in for just a girl.” He looks over with a raised eyebrow.
“She’s not just a girl,” I state matter-of-factly.
He nods with a trace of a smile on his lips before he glances down to the fading bruise across my knuckles. “How is that anger of yours coming along?”
“Would it surprise you to learn that it’s getting better?”
He chuckles. “No son, it would not.”
“I still feel it though. Like it’s just waiting to get out. I’m afraid it’s something I’m always going to struggle with.” I sigh.
He places a hand on my arm and squares his shoulders to me. “I think you’re right, but you’ve always been a fighter, Drew. You’re human, you will make mistakes, but I’m very proud of the man you’ve become.” His eyes mist up, and my chest swells with pride.
I nod, but to my surprise he’s not finished talking. “That girl is gonna test you. She’s gonna drive you crazy and push all your buttons. I know that because she reminds me a lot of your mother when I first met her. A little spitfire.” He grins as he remembers something fondly. “I won’t pretend to understand your relationship, but when she looks at you, son, it’s like nothing else in this world matters. You take good care of her.”
With a wink, he turns and goes into the house. My father’s words tumble around my head for the next few hours as the finishing touches on the party are completed. When everything is perfect, and all the guests have arrived, I clean up and set to the miserable task of waiting for Tessa to arrive.
“Sweetheart, you’re gonna wear a hole into my nice wood flooring if you’re not careful.”
I stop pacing long enough to cut her an icy look. She laughs and comes over to give my arms a gentle squeeze. “Everything is beautiful, she’s gonna love it. Stop worrying so much.”
I groan and lay my head on her shoulder. “She’s gonna freak out, this was a terrible idea.”
She chuckles. “Probably a little at first, but I stand by what I said, she’s gonna love it.”
“Shh, quit being a girl, I think I hear them,” Chase whisper yells from the living room. He arrived about an hour ago to “help” by drinking beer and watching TV.
Sure enough there’s a car door being shut and my sister’s obnoxious voice ringing out.
“Why is it so dark? I guess nobody’s home.” Beth and Tessa are on the front porch, the sound of the key in the lock sends a burst of adrenaline through my veins.
“Let’s watch something while we wait for Drew to pick you up for your date,” Beth says as she closes the front door behind them.
“Sounds good,” is Tessa’s happy response.
She flicks on the light in the living room, and everyone springs to action yelling “SURPRISE.”
Her eyes widen in shock, then travel to the banner strung up on the wall that reads “Happy Birthday Tessa!” Her eyes flick from face to face in disbelief. She’s frozen in place, like a deer trapped in headlights, panic is scrawled across her face. I take a step toward her, but with a flash of dark hair, she’s gone. I cringe when the front door slams shut behind her.
With one hand on my hip, I run my fingers through my hair. “Shit.”
“You owe me twenty bucks, MB,” Chase shouts across the room.
My sister pops out from around the corner with a frown. “Damn it.” She sighs.
I look back and forth between them in exasperation. “Seriously guys? You took fucking bets on this?”
“Bro, what are you waiting for? Go get your girl.” Chase laughs as he pops a chip in his mouth.
I lurch toward the front door. It doesn’t take long to find her sitting on the front porch swing, knees pulled to her chest. She looks away when I drop down beside her.
“Please, Andrew, I just can’t.” I take one of her hands and place it between mine, she’s trembling.
“Look at me.” Reluctantly, she turns to face me. “I know your birthdays have been hard, Tess, that you think you’re cursed or something, but that ends now.”
She scoffs. “Hard? They have been the worst days of my life. When I close my eyes, I can still see the blood pooling around your head. I can still feel my body being ripped into two when that monster raped me. I didn’t just have a few bad fucking hair days, Andrew.” She’s choking on her words.
I pull her into me and with a sag of her shoulders, she sinks into my embrace. I left her, forgot her, and in my absence the world broke her.
Beat her.
Raped her.
Shattered her.
The images of her suffering flood into my mind and light my fury. I grip her closer, feeling the red consume me. I’m shaking, itching to send my fist through the concrete wall behind us.
“I c—can’t believe I was off god knows where, doing god knows what and t—that was happening to you. I will find him, and I will f—fucking destroy him. Rip him limb from limb until he’s begging me to end his miserable fucking existence. T—tell me who. I swear to f—fucking God, you need to tell me.”
She angles her face up toward me, her frantic lips press against mine, and the roaring in my mind ceases. The red fades to a dull roar. My clenched muscles relax, and I throw myself into returning her sweet kiss. When she pulls back, we’re both breathless and flushed.
That’s never happened before, my eyebrows knit in confusion. When the anger starts, it can’t be snuffed out, even with the numerous strategies the doctor gave me, not a single one could shut it down that fast.
Tessa Kinsley thinks she’s cursed, but this girl is my blessing.
“Thank you.”
She sighs. “Don’t thank me. I can see it in your eyes, I made you feel guilty and I hate that. Don’t you ever feel guilty for what you had no control over. I just. . . I can’t handle this day. I don’t want to talk about what happened, and I can’t celebrate the worst days of my life. Please understand.”
“What day did we meet, Tessa?”
She throws me an irritated look. “That’s not what I’m talk—”
“What day?” I interrupt.
She sighs. “My eighth birthday.
“That’s right, making it the best day of my life. I’ve missed so many of your birthdays. I wasn’t able to bring you cake, to see your eyes light up when you unwrapped a new book. I couldn’t bring a smile to your lips or protect you from the horrors you would face. So if not for yourself, do this for me. I can’t rewrite history, but I can start replacing the bad memories with good ones. Not just your birthday either, but every damn day your heart still beats, I’m gonna be here putting you back together.”
A smile tugs at the corner of her mouth as she blinks back tears. “Were you always this much of a cheeseball?” she teases.
“Nah, Mom fucked me up.” I tap my temple a few times, making her laugh.
“Fine, how can I even argue with that? Looks like I’m gonna have a. . . birthday party.” She shudders and her nose crinkles in displeasure.
I stand and hold my hand out to hers, she looks up at me hesitantly. Her eyes of sapphire sparkle with love, but there’s still an undercurrent of worry and fear.
I encourage her with a reassuring smile.
With a deep breath, she accepts my hand and lets me lead her into the house. The chatter cuts out when Tessa enters the living room. All eyes shift to her, uncertain what to say or do.
She shrugs and gives a shy smile to the guests. “So, you guys ready to party or what?”
The tension dissipates as she’s met with cheers and raised glasses.