Kane
The overwhelming emotion of Fox and Zandra’s reunion had helped ease my hard-on situation. With all the crying and heartfelt words, keeping a hard-on proved to be impossible.
The day had finally come. Zandra and Fox were together again.
I had to admit that I never saw it coming. I had never really thought that we would see her again.
My emotions had been mixed on that subject before seeing her again. Now, I knew I wanted her to be a part of Fox’s life, and mine. But I had to admit that I didn’t know the woman who now sat next to me.
I had to take things slow. For my son, I had to watch what I did and how much I let Zandra in. That same old lust that I’d always felt was still there, burning a hole in my pants. But I had a kid now. And that kid had to be my number one priority.
She’d accepted the date I’d offered her, so we would finally be getting to know each other on a level we’d had the chance to explore before. It was a great start, and one I hoped would end up with us being close enough to raise our son together.
And screw around, too.
My dick was hard for her. I knew that particular organ would get what it wanted eventually. But I didn’t know about my heart. About what it wanted, or what it would be getting.
For all I knew, Zandra could have some pretty nasty habits that I could never deal with. I already knew that I wasn’t thrilled about what she did for work. With that kind of career, she most likely drank and stayed out late into the night more often than I did. She did work at a bar, after all.
Her lifestyle would prove to get in our way, I knew that already. Were there any other things about our lives that would make us incompatible?
“So, Zandra, are you working at the bar while you’re going to college or in some kind of a program?”
Shaking her head, she ran her hand over Fox’s head as he laid it on her shoulder, looking comfy with her already. “No. I should be honest with you, Kane. I’ve never looked past waitressing. My life has been kind of … empty since I had this one here and had to give him up.”
So she hadn’t been in a good place since she’d had the baby. That also might’ve had something to do with how much of a negative spin her parents had put on the pregnancy, or how they’d taken her away from everyone she’d ever known, then made her give up the child who’d been a part of her for nine months.
Those circumstances could send anyone into a downward spiral. It was no surprise she’d felt a bit stunted after that.
“You should get therapy.” Reaching out, I ran my hand over her other shoulder, the one where Fox wasn’t leaning. “What you’ve gone through isn’t easy. I’ll make sure you get help.”
She blinked at me a few times. “I think I can handle it. And now that I’ve got Fox in my life again, I think I’ll be okay from here on out.”
So she wasn’t great at accepting help. That wouldn’t be easy for me to deal with, stubborn man that I was. “Okay. Well, let’s just take things nice and slow. And if you do feel like some therapy will help you, then don’t hesitate to ask me. I know lots of great therapists, and I don’t mind paying them to take care of you. As a matter of fact, Fox sees one once a month to talk about you.”
Her eyes narrowed at me. “You make him go to therapy?”
“Yup,” Fox answered for me, perking up again. “And I like Doc Parsons. He’s nice, and he and I talk about all kinds of things. I’ve known him pretty much my whole life.”
With Fox’s words, her narrowed eyes had opened back up and she went back to stroking him, running her hand over his back. I noticed that she couldn’t seem to stop touching him, and that made me so happy to see.
“Well, as long as you like doing it, then that’s good.” She looked at me. “As you can imagine, I don’t like it when parents make their kids do things against their will.”
Yes, I could already see that Zandra had been damaged by what her parents had done. Hearing more about how they’d handled the situation, I could only imagine that nothing about her childhood had been easy. Yet she wasn’t willing to get help to begin to mend things within her.
This may not be easy.
Fox laughed as he looked up at her. “Dad makes me do lots of things I don’t want to do. I’ve got to make my own bed even though we have a maid who comes in twice a week. I’ve got to take out the trash, too. And I’ve got to make good grades, or I have to go to after-school tutoring until I bring the grade up. I could go on and on about the things he makes me do.”
Thankfully, she laughed, then tousled his hair. “Yeah, I bet you could. But those sound like good dad things that he should definitely be making you do. I would have to agree with him about those kinds of things.” She looked at the floor. “But he’s the one you should be listening to, Fox, not me. I don’t know if I’m even considered your mother still, legally.”
Though I was thrilled that Fox had his mother in his life, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to change anything legally just yet. “We’ll see how things go, Zandra. I don’t want to rush into anything. At least this is just between you and me. My aunt and uncle no longer have any paperwork tying him to them. He’s mine and mine alone. Well, you know what I mean. On paper he’s mine. Only mine.” I spoke quietly, trying to keep this just between Zandra and me. Unfortunately, Fox had great ears.
But he surprised me by standing up and looking at me with defiance in his eyes. “Dad! She’s my mom. I don’t want to see how things go. I want you to make her my mom for real!”
My kid didn’t get away with throwing tantrums, even if they were about important and valid topics. I stood up and pointed at the chair. “Over there, now.”
“Dad, I’m serious,” he said in a much quieter voice.
“So am I. Now, son.” I pointed at the chair and looked at it.
Reluctantly, he went to sit down, and I caught Zandra chewing on her lower lip. “Kane, please don’t be mad at him.”
“I’m not mad, Zandra.” Turning my attention to my son, I said, “Fox Colton Price, are you allowed to ever raise your voice in an ugly way to anyone?”
His arms crossed over his chest as he looked at the floor. “No, sir.”
“Eyes on me.” I made him look at me. “I understand that this is very important to you, and that you’re very excited about meeting your mother. That said, I am your father, and I decide what’s right for you. Do you understand me?”
His eyes grew big as he shook his head. “Not about her, I don’t. That’s my mom. And nothing you or anyone else does can change that.”
“Oh, Kane.” Zandra came up behind Fox, putting her arms around him as he sat in the chair. “I’m sure he didn’t mean to get so loud with you. Tell him you’re sorry, Fox. Tell him you won’t yell at him again.”
“Sorry, Dad.” He looked back at Zandra. “I’m sorry I yelled, but not sorry for what I said. No one can take you away from me. No one. Not even Dad.”
His words chilled my soul. I had no plans on keeping him from his mother, but that boy had always been mine. Just mine. Sure, my parents and aunt and uncle had helped raise him, but it’d always just been me and him. In name, he’d been mine alone since my aunt and uncle had turned over custody to me.
This didn’t feel good at all.
Fox had his mom now. A woman neither of us knew, really. And what I did know wasn’t exactly great, so far.
But I could see now that I would have to watch what I said in front of my son. And I’d seen a side of him I’d never seen before—a side that must’ve come from his mother, because my side of the family didn’t act that way.
Her parents had been real hard-asses after all. Could my son be capable of fighting just as hard as they had to keep him a secret?
The future had seemed so bright only minutes before, but now I was getting a glimpse of just how challenging it could be.
Zandra’s eyes met mine. “Kane, we’ve got a lot to take in. Maybe we should part ways now to let things sink in. I could use a drink, anyway.”
And there it was. She wanted to leave her son already to go have a drink. And it was only five in the evening, at that.
Well, I guessed five was about when most happy hours started, so I guessed the average person thought it was okay to partake in the cocktails at that time. But I couldn’t help feeling a little judgmental—she wasn’t just an average person; she was my son’s mother, and I’d do anything to protect him.
“Yeah, I guess you probably do need one.” I could concede that she’d had a harder day than normal, though.
“I bet you do too,” she teased as she made her way to the door.
“Nah.” I followed after her. “Hey, we need to exchange phone numbers. Give me your cell.”
“Oh, yeah.” She reached into her back pocket, taking it out then handing it to me.
Fox came up, wrapping himself around her again. “Don’t go. Please. I just got you. Please.”
She looked a little bewildered as she said, “Um, Fox, I can’t sit here in this office all night. I’ve got to get home.”
“How come?” he asked her, a pitiful look on his face.
Handing her phone back to her, I tried to make him understand things. “Because she probably has things at home that she needs to take care of.” Then I thought about something else I might want to have. “How about you give me your address, Zandra?”
“Oh, sure.” She went to the desk, found a blank piece of paper, and wrote it down. “Here you go.” Patting Fox on the back, she said, “I’m off tomorrow. If it’s okay with your dad, I can see you then.”
“I’ve got to go to school,” Fox said with a frown. He looked at me with a smile. “Can she take me to school, Dad?”
“Oh, I don’t know.” I looked at her. “Is that something you want to do, Zandra?”
“Um … I … don’t—” She had that deer-in-the-headlights look about her again.
“I think we’ve caught her a little off guard.” I chuckled and shook my head at my son. “I think we’ve got to give her time to get her bearings before something like that. Heck, we don’t even know if she’s got a car to take you to school in.”
“Of course I have a car, Kane.” She looked a little miffed. “I’m actually doing pretty well financially, now that I work at Mynt. I can take him. What time do I need to pick you up, Fox? And from what address?”
It occurred to me suddenly that the school had rules about who could pick up the kids and drop them off. “I forgot, Fox. She’s not on the list. We’ll have to get her on the list first.”
“Can you do it tomorrow?” he asked as he looked at me with droopy eyes. “I really want her to take me sometimes, and even pick me up sometimes too.”
How could I tell my kid that I had no idea if his mother was in any way capable of taking on such a big responsibility yet? How could I let him know that I had no idea about her moral character, or if she would even be fit to do things like pick him up or take him to school?
And how could I do it with her standing right there?
“Tell you what, Fox. Let me hammer out all these details with the school this evening, and I’ll call your mom to work things out with her too.”
That should work for now.
“Okay, thanks, Dad.” He wiggled his finger at Zandra. “Can I have a kiss on the cheek before you go, Mom?”
She laughed then leaned down to kiss his cheek. “You’ll make a mother out of me yet, won’t you?”
“I will.” He beamed at her, looking so proud of himself as he opened the door for her. “I’ll walk with you out to your car. I don’t want anything to happen to you, Mom.”
“I’ll join you two.” I came up on the other side of her as Fox took her hand. “It seems he’s taken a shine to you, Zandra,” I whispered over his head.
I had to admit to myself that my son’s behavior was a little bothersome to me. Could I really be feeling jealous that he’d taken so well to his mom?
I shook the feeling off. We would work out all the kinks in this new thing we’d all fallen into. I had to keep in mind that Zandra had been completely caught off guard, much more so than either Fox or me.
Hell, she’d had no clue that I had the boy or that I even knew he existed. This had to be knocking her out of the water. It would’ve done the same to me if the shoe were on the other foot.
As we went outside, she pointed at a shiny red Mustang. “That’s me over there.”
“The sports car?” Fox asked. When she nodded, he added, “So cool! My mom’s gonna be one of those cool moms.” He pumped his fist in the air. “Yes!”
As a doctor, that wasn’t exactly the kind of mother I wanted for my son. I wanted her to be one of the respectable moms—one of the responsible ones. A cool mom wasn’t something I had ever dreamt of for him.
Her long legs bent gracefully as she sat in the low-profile car. “Thank you, boys, for walking me out.” She put on a pair of Ray-Bans, making her look even more beautiful, and yes, I could admit, cooler too. “I look forward to hearing from you later on tonight, Kane.”
“I’ll call you when I’ve got my ducks in a row. It’ll be after nine, after I’ve put Fox to bed.” I closed the door for her, and she gave us a little wave.
Fox looked up at me as he knocked on her darkly tinted window. “Hey, wait.”
“What are you doing now?” I asked him as I put my hand on his shoulder.
“You’ll see.” He looked at his mother as she rolled the window down.
“Yes?” she asked him.
“Why don’t you just come over to our house and Dad can cook for us out on the grill?” He looked up at me. “She could stay the night, and we can all go to school together, and you can get her put on the list first thing in the morning. Please, Dad.”
“Um … I—” He’d put me in one hell of a hard place with that.
She looked at me too, but the dark sunglasses hid her expression from me. I had no idea where she stood on this.
But I knew, as a responsible father, that you didn’t go bringing strangers into your home. And you didn’t let them spend the night. And that was that.
“Dad, why are you taking so long to answer me?” Fox pushed further. “Just say yes already. Please.”
“I’ve got to say no on this one, buddy. Zandra has a lot to take in, after all. Let’s give her some space. Sorry.” The way he looked at me crushed me. Well, almost crushed me. I was a dad, and dads didn’t crush all that easily.
One day he would be a dad, and then he would understand. But until then he was just a little boy who’d finally gotten a mom, and he wasn’t happy with my decision.
“Fine!” He stalked back into the hospital.
“Whoa,” Zandra said. “Well. I’ll talk to you later then.”
She backed up at what I thought was too fast a speed. Her tires spun a bit as she left the parking lot, and I both adored her as a man and didn’t much like her as a father.
What the hell have I gotten into here?