Zandra
Wiping down the bar, I waited for the new bartender, Ashley, to make my drink order. At ten on a Friday night, the club was busy, taking most of my attention. After the way things had been going, I felt very grateful for that.
Four days had passed since my brunch with Kane. Agreeing to take things nice and slow, we’d parted ways without even a kiss goodbye. I supposed both of us knew where that kiss would lead, so we’d avoided it.
I’d already called Fox for our nightly goodnight ritual. He asked me if I thought I could make time for him on Sunday, since he knew I would have the day off. I told him I was free but that it would be up to his father if we could spend time together or not.
I had the distinct impression that Kane wasn’t sure about me at all, other than the fact that he knew he wanted my body. And how could I blame him?
A whole week went by without my finding another job that paid as well as my position at Mynt. On top of that, I hadn’t found the time to see about trading my Mustang for something more suitable for a mother.
I knew Kane wasn’t pleased with the lack of change. And I knew that because he and I talked every day on his lunch break. He would ask me how the job search was going. I would tell him it wasn’t going well. He would ask me if I’d gotten down to any car dealerships to see about trading my car in, and I had to tell him that I hadn’t. He would ask when I thought I might find time to do those things and I would tell him I didn’t know. Then he’d sigh and wish me luck and we’d end the call. The same old conversation each day.
I knew it had only been a week, but that afternoon call was already becoming a thing I didn’t look forward to. Not because I didn’t love to hear his deep, smooth voice that had just the slightest hint of a southern accent, but because I could hear the disappointment in that sexy voice each time he asked a question and I had nothing positive to report.
Hell, I hadn’t even gone shopping to buy myself some appropriate “mom” clothes. I hadn’t done anything, other than sleep, eat, and go to work.
Working nights meant sleeping most of the day away. Generally, I worked until two in the morning. When I got off, I would usually go somewhere to eat with coworkers. That would take an hour or so. I would head home then and would need an hour or so to wind down before I’d finally be able to go to sleep. That meant it was usually around five in the morning when I finally made it to sleep.
My day would start around one in the afternoon, when Kane called me, waking me up. And that was another thing he didn’t seem to understand. Of course I sounded groggy from being woken up. He would ask if I’d been asleep, and I would say yes. Then he would sigh and ask me what time I had gone to bed.
Being a doctor, Kane had to let me know that staying up that late and sleeping all day wasn’t healthy. Fox deserved a mother who tried her best to stay healthy, he’d remind me. And I had to agree with him about that, but I didn’t have much choice in that, with the job I had. Not if I wanted to continue living where I was. The apartment was nice, and it did cost more than most of the apartments around town.
So, I faced the dilemma of whether I would stay where I was—job, apartment, and all—or move into something cheaper and get a job that paid less.
I seriously had no idea how single mothers did it. And I had no idea how I was going to do it, either.
“Handsome stranger at two o’clock, Zee,” Ashley said as her eyes looked over my shoulder.
Turning around, I saw that Kane had come to pay me a surprise visit. I couldn’t say I was exactly thrilled by that. “Hey,” I said as he came up to the bar, taking the tall stool next to me.
“Hey.” He took my hand, pulling me to him and kissing my cheek. “It’s Friday. I don’t have work tomorrow, so I thought I’d come out and spend some time with you.”
Despite my initial lack of enthusiasm about his visit, I couldn’t help how my body reacted to him. Wet heat pooled between my thighs and my head went light. “How sweet of you.” I kissed his cheek but wanted so much more than that. Some motherly instinct crept up inside of me. “And who’s with Fox?”
“Aunt Nancy came over to stay with him while I’m out. He was already asleep when I left.” He smiled at me, making my heart flip. “And I’m happy to hear you ask about him.”
And then I got a little mad about that. “I care about him, Kane.”
“I know.” He let my hand go and looked at Ashley, who seemed to be hanging onto our every word. “Can I have a rum and Coke, please?”
“Sure thing,” she said before her eyes shifted to mine. “Your drink order is ready, Zee.” Putting the tray on the bar, she winked at me. “He’s a cute little secret, isn’t he?”
My cheeks warmed as a blush covered them. “I suppose so.”
A look of disappointment came over his handsome face. “You haven’t told the people you work with about me? About us?”
Shaking my head, I picked up the tray. “No. Only Taylor knows. I’ve got to get these drinks out. Don’t think I’m ignoring you, Kane. It’s just a busy night, and I’ve got to keep working.”
“You go work. Just come back and say hi from time to time.” He smacked my ass as I walked away. “Be good.”
Although I wasn’t in the market for a boyfriend—I never really had been at any point in my life—the fact that Kane sometimes treated me like I belonged to him kind of made me angry. He hadn’t made anything official between us, after all. Yet there he was, watching me, touching me, telling me to be good. I didn’t understand him at all.
“Here’re your drinks, ladies.” I placed the cocktails in front of the women at my table who were out hoping to have a great night.
When I turned to go to my next table, I caught Taylor talking to Kane out of the corner of my eye. Jealousy shot right through me. But I didn’t have time for that, as I had to get the next table’s order.
“What can I get you guys?” I asked the three men who’d just sat down.
“Beers,” came one’s reply. “Anything you got on tap. And cheap, too. I lost a bet, and I’m buying the rounds tonight.”
“Got ya.” I left them and went to the next table, as that order would be easy to remember. “Hi, you two, what can I get for you this evening?” I asked the couple who’d sat down while I was at the bar.
“A gin and tonic for me,” the man said as he wrapped his arm around the woman at his side. “And she’ll have a martini, a dirty one, please.”
“Okie dokie,” I said before heading back to the bar.
Taylor, still chatting with Kane, spotted me and waited for me to get to them. “I hope you don’t mind. I wanted to properly introduce myself to Kane. The baby-daddy.”
Kane’s frown at that name let me know that he probably wasn’t a fan of hers so far. “I don’t think I like that title, Taylor.”
Giving her a stoic stare, I added, “Me neither.” Ashley came to get my order. “Three drafts, whatever’s the cheapest, a dirty martini, and a gin and tonic.”
Ashley nodded. “By the way, Rob came up and told me to let you girls know that he wants you to step it up. Do a little dancing on the bar, get some guys doing body-shots. Ramp up the atmosphere.” Then she set to work on the drinks.
Taylor winked at me. “Oh, goody! You get to show off your sexy moves, Zee.”
I did not want to show off any sexy moves with Kane watching me. “I’ll sit this one out.”
“The hell you will,” I heard Rob say from behind me. His gray eyes flashed to Kane. “Is this your boyfriend, Zee?”
Kane stood up, extending his hand. “Hello, I’m Dr. Kane Price. Zandra and I have a son together.”
“Is that so?” Rob asked as he shook Kane’s hand. “Well, she and I have a boss/employee relationship, and as her boss, I’m asking her to get on top of this bar and dance, and then allow men to drink shots out of her bellybutton. Are you opposed to that? Wait—I don’t care whether you are or not. This is her job, and she’ll do as I say or she can go find another one.”
Not liking the aggression in my boss’s voice, I interjected. “Rob, he’s not saying I can’t do it. I just don’t want to.” I looked him in the eyes. “Not right now.”
“You don’t want to because he’s here,” he said. And he was right about that.
But I didn’t want Kane to think that. “No. I just don’t feel like it right now.”
Kane took his seat, sipping on the drink he’d ordered, letting me fight my own battle. I liked that about him, but then again, it would’ve been nice of him to say something maybe.
I saw an opportunity for Kane to be my hero, my knight in shining armor. He could’ve told Rob that he would take care of me and that I could quit the damn job and go live with him and our son and we would have our happily ever after. Only he didn’t do that. He sat there, sipping on his drink, waiting to see what I would do for myself.
“Well, I said do it, Zee,” came Rob’s reply.
Knowing Kane was watching me to see how I would handle this situation, probably analyzing my every word to see how I would handle similar things when it came to Fox, I squared my shoulders and prepared to do battle with my boss. “I said no. Now move, so I can take these orders to my customers.”
I didn’t know if there was a fire in my eyes, or what the hell had happened, but Rob stepped to one side. “Fine.”
I won!
Or had I?
Rob’s expression was hard. I had a sinking feeling he wasn’t exactly letting me win. But for now, it looked that way. Being in front of Kane, I didn’t let it get to me too much.
Taking the tray, I went to serve the drinks, feeling the weight of Rob’s stare on my back. “Fucking asshole,” I muttered underneath my breath.
For the next hour, I worked my ass off, barely getting the chance to say a single word to Kane, who still sat at the bar nursing the one drink. Everything was going well until a rowdy group of college boys came into the club, sitting at one of my tables. I quickly became the center of their attention.
“What can I get you guys?” I asked the group. There were eight of them in total. They were all pretty big, and the testosterone filled the air around them.
One burly guy got up, picked me up without a word, and sat me on the table. “Body-shots. On your sexy little body, baby.”
To my horror, another waitress, Jerrie, came up to the table with a bottle of Captain Morgan in her hand. “I’ve got ya, Zee.”
“But I don’t—” that’s all I got out before the big guy pushed me back on the table and Jerrie filled up my bellybutton with the first shot.
She smiled as she poured the cool liquid. “Loosen up, Zee. Have some fun.”
Any other time, I could’ve totally let go and gone with the flow. But this time Kane was there. Watching me. Judging me. Finding me guilty of not being the kind of mother he wanted for our son.
I tried not to worry as the guys took turns doing their shots. In the end, the big guy helped me up then placed a hundred in my hand. “Thanks, baby.”
Shame filled me for the first time in a very long time as I placed that bill into my bra. “Yeah.” Ducking my head, I had to go back to my locker to put some of my tips away before they overflowed.
Making sure to take the long way around to avoid Kane, I went into the back. I tried my hardest to sneak past Rob’s office, but he heard me. “Come in here.”
“Fuck!” I pushed the door the rest of the way open. “Look, Rob, I can’t do this right now. I’m a fucking mess. I know you don’t get it or even care to, but I’m a wreck right now.”
“Yeah, I know that.” he pointed at the chair. “Take a seat.”
I didn’t want to take a seat. What I really wanted to do was just grab the rest of my tips, head out the back door, and run away from everyone—Kane included. But his stern look had me sitting down. “’K.”
“You need to tell that man not to come back here,” he said. “He’s affecting your work.”
“I can’t tell him not to come here, Rob.” I looked at him with pleading eyes. “I’m trying to be a part of our son’s life. I’m trying to become what I need to be for my son.”
“And I’m trying to run a fun and profitable nightclub. So what you’re trying to do and what I’m trying to do isn’t meshing. Tell him to leave and not to come back or I will. End of discussion.” He pointed at the door. “That’s all. Get back to work.”
Getting up, I had no idea what to do. I couldn’t tell Kane to go away. I went to my locker, put the cash away, and then headed back out. Kane was no longer at the bar, and I didn’t know if I felt relief or panic.
Ashley came up to me. “He left.”
“Did he ask you to tell me anything?” I asked, hoping he would’ve at least told her to tell me goodbye or something.
She shook her head. “He didn’t say a thing. He put a twenty on the bar then left.” She pulled the money out of her pocket. “I assume he wanted you to have it.”
Shaking my head, I said, “You keep it. I don’t want it.” I had to see if he’d gotten out of the club yet. “I’m taking a few minutes, Ash.”
“’K,” she said, looking like she understood.
I headed to the exit to see if I could catch him, though I highly doubted I would. And even if I did, I didn’t know what I would even say to him.
This will never work.