Chapter 12

Tessa

 

 

I am so over it already, and it’s still the first month of school. What the hell was I thinking?

“Rise and shine, sunshine!” Maria sang from outside my door.

“Go away,” I mumbled. “I don’t want to be an adult today.”

I could hear her laugh as she headed down the short hallway into the kitchen. It wasn’t long before I heard the whirring of the Keurig. Within seconds, it started up again. She was making me a cup of coffee, thank God. I felt like I needed a direct line to even get out of bed.

The door swung open and in walked Maria, carrying two cups of steaming coffee.

“Here, drink up. This will give you the little burst of energy you need to get your ass out of bed,” she said, handing me the cup.

I scooted around and sat up in bed, taking the first hot sip. As she promised, I could feel the coffee flowing down my throat, triggering little neurons or whatever and zapping them awake.

“You going to make it?” she asked, in a serious tone.

I nodded. “Yes, but I’m going to bitch about it the whole time. I’m exhausted.”

She slowly nodded her head. “I shouldn’t say I told you so, but, well, I did. You heaped too much shit on your plate, girl. I don’t know what you were thinking.”

“That I didn’t want to spend five years in school doing something that should only take four. I don’t want to spend money on stupid classes. I am ready to be done with school and get busy actually getting to work and making some money,” I reminded her.

She shook her head. “I know, I feel you there. I’m sorry, really. I know this is brutal for you.”

I smiled. “I can’t believe how much homework I have. I wasn’t anticipating that. Between my class schedule, the homework, and then the assistant position, I feel like I’m being pulled in a hundred different directions. I have no time to do anything. Eat, sleep, school, and sometimes, the first two have to take a back seat,” I grumbled.

“Maybe you should tell your hot professor to lighten up,” she replied.

“I can’t do that!” I said in horror. “His credit is the most important.”

Maria shrugged. “I think he could do some of his own grading at least. You aren’t supposed to be his slave. He’s getting paid to teach and that means grading papers and all the other crap you do. Don’t let him take advantage of you.”

I had this sudden need to defend Ian. “It isn’t like that. I like the grading and stuff, but the guy gives a LOT of quizzes. More than any other professor I’ve had.”

“Are you leaving after class on Friday?” she asked.

I nodded. “Yep. My flight leaves at 3:30. It’s cutting it close, but I’ll make it.”

“Good. I’m glad you’re going home for the weekend. It will do you good.”

I wasn’t quite so sure, but I needed to go back. I had to check on my mom, and I really needed to visit Talia. I hadn’t been able to go to her grave on her birthday. I owed her some flowers.

Maria nodded and took a drink of her coffee before patting my knee. “Okay, get moving. I need to go put my face on.”

“Thank you for my coffee delivery,” I said as she walked out the door. I allowed myself another minute of wallowing in bed drinking coffee before I forced myself to get up and get my butt moving.

“Only another eight months, Tessa, you can do this,” I muttered as I pulled open drawers and started grabbing clothes. Eight months felt like an eternity.

I managed to get to class about two minutes early. I knew Ian wouldn’t approve, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. I was tired.

“Hi,” he said when I came in. He actually smiled at me. It was a real smile, one that I had seen only on a few rare occasions.

It let down my guard. “Hi,” I said, a little hesitantly. I glanced around the room, expecting there to be a firing squad or something equally terrible.

“You okay?” he asked, with real concern in his voice.

Now, I was really convinced there was something going on. He had barely spoken more than a few words to me in the past three weeks, and now he was acting like we were buddies. I wasn’t in the mood.

“Am I fired?” I blurted out.

The look he gave me was a combination of horror and amusement. “Not that I’m aware of. Should you be?”

“No, but I’m late, and you’re being nice,” I said, not mincing words.

He threw his head back and laughed. “Have a seat, Tessa. You’re fine. You aren’t late, and I like to think I’m always nice.”

I gave him a look that expressed my opinion on that particular subject.

He smiled. “Okay, so maybe not nice all the time, but certainly not a tyrant, either.”

“Whatever,” I said, rolling my eyes, and quickly returned to my desk. I didn’t have it in me to play his weird games. He ran hot and cold, and it took far more energy to be his friend than I had to give. The guy had serious issues. I certainly had my own, but I wasn’t playing with his emotions. He seemed to think I was someone he could mess with. I was no such thing, and he was going to learn right away that I wasn’t some yo-yo. He didn’t get to pull me in and push me out. Head games had never been my thing, and I wasn’t about to start playing them now.

I managed to get some of my own work done while he taught, which made me feel a little better. I didn’t feel as if I was completely buried, but I knew by the end of the day, I would be right back to square one.

The second class was nearly over when I finally finished the last of my homework. I quietly tucked away the evidence, hoping he hadn’t noticed that I hadn’t been paying all that much attention to his lecture. As usual, I waited until the students left before I gathered my own things to leave.

“Tessa?” He stopped me when I was almost to the door. I cringed, expecting a warning for doing my homework in his class.

“Yes, Professor Dunlap?” I meant to say it in a sweet, congenial tone, but the way it came out made me sound more like a smartass. I instantly regretted it.

He smiled. “Want to grab some coffee?”

I stared at him. Blinked, opened my mouth to say something—anything, but nothing came out.

“What?” I managed to get out.

“Coffee. Would you like to go get some coffee? On me?” he added.

An image popped into my mind that had no business being there. I quickly banished it and focused on the first half of his sentence. “Uh, sure,” I said, wondering if this is the part where he fired me from my duties.

We walked to the cafeteria, the same one we had gone to once before, forever ago it seemed. The memory made me smile. He had been so kind back then, but suddenly a couple days later, he switched off. He turned into a complete robot, and we had barely spoken since. I’m sure this coffee date would probably result in another banishment, but I didn’t care. A girl didn’t turn down a free coffee, no matter who the company was. Okay, yes, I did have some standards, but Ian was hot, and I did like to talk to him when he was normal Ian and not stuffy Professor Dunlap.

“Looks like it’s going to rain,” he said, as we got in line. “Do you also sit outside to drink coffee in the rain?”

I knew he was joking. “Nope, I only dance in the rain. You want me to find us a table inside?”

He nodded. “Sure, I’ll grab the coffees and find you.”

I left in search of the perfect table that would provide us with some privacy. This was a big student hang out, and the last thing I wanted to do was get any rumors started. I found one tucked away in a corner behind a garbage can and quickly claimed it.

“There you are,” he said, handing me my coffee. “I thought maybe you changed your mind and left.”

I laughed. “No, but I figured it would probably be better if we didn’t advertise our friendship in the student cafeteria.”

He nodded. “Good thinking. How’ve you been, Tessa?” he asked it in a way that made me feel all warm and gooey inside.

I nodded. “Good.” That’s what you’re supposed to say, right? I couldn’t very well tell him that he’d been a cold fish for three weeks and I was stressed out about classes and his workload.

He took a sip of his coffee, and I find myself watching his mouth—his lips, really.

“What are your plans for the weekend?” he asked, drawing my eyes back to his own.

I sighed. “I’m going home for a few days. You?”

He rolled his eyes. “My brother is dragging me to a barbecue with a bunch of our old friends.”

I had to chuckle, he said dragged, but I could tell by the way his eyes lit up that he was actually excited to be going. I couldn’t resist teasing him a bit.

“That sounds dreadful. Will there be food and beer and all that other horrible stuff one finds at a barbecue?”

He laughed. “Actually, yes. And the food will be prepared by a professional chef, so you can imagine how bad it will be.”

“That does sound bad. Whatever you do, don’t let them force you to take home any leftovers,” I said in a hushed tone.

Another laugh and I found myself actually having a good time. Why can’t he be like this all the time? I like this guy. Ian is fun. Professor Dunlap is a bit of a dick.

“Class seems to be going well, don’t you think?” he asked, steering the conversation back to the professional side of things.

I nodded. “Yes, I think the students are trusting you more. It’s going very well. Don’t worry, you’re doing fine,” I assured him.

“Thank you. Some days I feel like I’m talking to the wall,” he replied.

We talked about the upcoming trip down to one of the beaches and what he hoped to accomplish. I checked the time and realized I had to get going.

“Thanks for the coffee,” I told him, standing and preparing to leave. He reached out and grabbed my hand, taking me by surprise. I questioned him with my eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he says.

Nothing more. I had no idea what he was apologizing for and didn’t have a lot of time to get into a conversation about it.

“Okay,” I said, pulling my hand away. “I’ll see you tomorrow. I really need to get home and get some stuff done before my roommate kicks me out.”

He gazed at me for a long second before looking away. I hurried out the door and made my way to my car. I needed to study for a test and make a real dinner. It was my night. Maria would be late, and I owed it to her. She had been taking care of me for way too long. 

As I went about making dinner, I couldn’t help but think back to Ian and what he had said. What was he apologizing for? He had seemed very sincere, and I believed him. I just didn’t know what exactly he meant.