Once again, I found myself alone in my room, lying back on my bed. My phone was lying beside me, and I didn’t have any music playing this time, though. I’d already gone through my music playlist and was getting sick of listening to the music.

Fuck. I miss Stacey.

It was all I could think about. It had been too long since I saw her, and I was missing her like crazy.

More than a week had gone by since the funeral. I hadn't been back to school yet, and from what I knew, she hadn't gone back, either.

Why the fuck did I ever ask her for space?

She’d had something to talk to me about, the day of the funeral, but she hadn't gotten back to me after that. And when I’d seen her there…

Admittedly, it wasn’t the best of times. Our parents had gotten into a fight—or, technically just her parents, but it was still over my mom—and the whole town had been ready to back up her mom, because to them, she wasn’t in the wrong. I’d hoped Stacey would said something…but that would have been cruel of me to ask. They were her parents. She probably hated what was going on with them. I shouldn’t have expected her to do anything about it. If anything, I should have been the one to come out and say something.

Instead, I moved away and went to hide somewhere. The fight ended, the procession went on, and my best friend got buried.

Mom had left me alone in the house. She and Paul had gone to stay over at my aunt’s up in the mountains. They both wanted to get away from town, Paul especially after his very public fight with his wife at his son’s funeral. In the end, he and my mom couldn’t stick around for it. With the town at Carol’s back, and it being his son’s funeral, he’d decided, in the end, to withdraw instead of dragging things too far. I’d noticed Stacey’s expression when he did. She might not have moved to stop her mom, but she was still unhappy that her dad left.

I knew Paul was hurt, for one thing about Rod dying, and the part he had played in it. And not being able to bury him on top of that. As much as I didn’t like the fact that he had been sleeping with my mom and making life difficult for my best friend, I could feel a bit of sympathy for him.

After the whole funeral fiasco, neither of them wanted to be in town, and especially with the rumors spreading like wildfire. That was just fine with me. What wasn’t, was going outside the house and getting a bunch of looks from people. I’d expected it, but it was still annoying.

So I’d holed myself up in my room again. And then, all I could think about was how Stacey had looked when I saw her at the funeral. In her black dress, with her hair and make-up done up, she’d looked beautiful. Also, incredibly sad. It was to be expected, considering the circumstances. But then I’d remembered what she’d come to say to me at my house, and when she’d called me, and I’d been cold to her.

Why the ever loving fuck did I do that… I’m supposed to be there for her no matter what.

And not just because she was my girlfriend. But, because her brother had passed away, and now that she didn’t have him anymore, it was my job to look after her. Rod and I always joked about it, but it had come true; he wasn’t there, and Stacey was alone. If ever there was something Rod had always been worried about, it was that his sister would be unhappy. He was closer to their mom than she was, and while she and their dad were pretty close, too, he’d told me once that she felt like an outsider in their family. So, even with her dad out of the house, being left with only her mom wouldn’t be relaxing for her.

But, because I was a fucking coward, I couldn’t bring myself to try and contact her first or try to go to her house. Besides, she’d wanted to talk about something important, right? I’d been so sure she’d try to contact me quickly.

I was getting tired of waiting.

Grow a pair and get on with it, I thought to myself, closing my eyes. Only for them to snap right back open when I thought I heard something. Then, I heard it again. It took me a second to recognize it as knocking, fast, hard and impatient, like whoever it was had been knocking for a while.

I frowned. Who could be at my door at this kind of time? I checked my phone, and it was the middle of the night, not far off from midnight.

What the fuck?

There was more knocking, and I feared whoever it was would be loud enough to wake up the neighbors. I got up, picking up my phone and using the flashlight to go through the dark house, turning on the lights as I went so I could shove my cell phone in my pants pocket. Once the living room light came on, the knocking stopped.

When I opened the door, I gaped at who was on the other side of it.

“Stacey,” I choked out. “The fuck are you doing here this late…”

She wasn’t even dressed properly, just in a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. She had her arms wrapped around herself, and she was frowning. Her expression cleared, though, as I opened the door. She pushed inside, ignoring my confused words, and I closed the door behind her.

“I know my dad, and your mom are out of town, my mom told me.”

I would have wondered how she even found out, but I had something much more important standing right in front of me. Suddenly, nothing else mattered. I wasn’t worried about what she was doing at my house so late at night, what mattered more than anything was that Stacey was right in front of me, after so long. And, she didn’t look like she was there to chew me out again.

My body moved on its own. I wrapped my arms around her waist to drag her body to mine. My head ducked down so I could press a kiss to her lips. She didn’t stop me, and that just fueled me more. I pushed her back against my front door as I ravaged her mouth. Her arms rose to wrap around my neck and hold onto me tightly as she kissed me back just as roughly.

After a while, I had to pull back so we could both catch our breath. I looked at her. Her eyes weren’t as red as when I saw her last. Her face wasn’t as pale, either, though the light pink on her cheeks and the tip of her nose might have been more from the cold than anything else. She felt somewhat thinner in my arms, and that was slightly alarming.

But, she still looked beautiful to me.

“I missed you, Stacey,” I whispered, pressing my forehead against hers. “So fucking much.”

“I missed you, too,” she admitted, pushing on her tiptoes to kiss me some more.