Shayna forced herself to close the curtains over the sliding doors that led to their small balcony. There was absolutely no reason to stand there watching Tristan drive away.
She hadn’t been too surprised that Timothy had fallen asleep in the car on the way home and then refused to wake up. It had been sweet of Tristan to carry Timothy up to his room. Though she used to do it herself, it was nearly impossible for her to lift his weight anymore. He wasn’t the biggest kid, but she wasn’t all that strong.
After making sure the townhouse was locked up, she walked back upstairs and went into Timothy’s room. She pulled a pair of pajama pants from the drawer and carefully removed his jeans and the jersey he’d apparently received at some point during the evening. He still had a T-shirt underneath it, so she left that on then tugged the pajama pants on before tucking him under his blankets.
She pressed a kiss to his forehead then stood for a moment looking down at his sleeping form, feeling her heart swell with love for him. No doubt he’d be crawling into her bed come morning, anxious to spill all the details of his evening with Tristan. She was sure that his night had been a lot more fun than hers.
As she left the room, she pulled the door partly shut behind her, then she headed to her room to get ready for bed. The memory of what had gone on during the hours Timothy had been with Tristan still weighed heavy on her. No matter how she crunched the numbers or tried to work her budget, there was no way she’d be able to stay in the townhouse. Especially now that she wasn’t able to take on extra shifts at work.
The co-op had a minimum income requirement, and together, she and Lisa had managed to meet that requirement. By herself, however, there was just no way she was going to be able to swing it. Even if they moved to a smaller unit, the minimum was still more than what she currently earned. Not that it mattered because when she’d asked if they had a two-bedroom place available, they’d told her there was none. No one-bedroom ones either.
So she was left with no choice except finding a new place to live. Of course, a higher paying job would have worked as well, but that wasn’t likely to happen. Back when she and Lorne had first gotten married and settled into their small one room apartment, they’d both had plans—big plans—to move on from their minimum wage jobs.
Lorne’s job in a factory had been steady, and his hard work had resulted in raises. She had worked herself up from bussing tables to being a waitress which meant she’d also been able to earn tips. It had been hard bussing tables while pregnant, but Timothy’s arrival in their lives had brought challenges they hadn’t really considered beforehand.
To minimize childcare costs, Lorne had worked from seven until three, and then she’d worked from four until eleven. It had been the only way they’d been able to afford to move to a two-bedroom apartment. In the midst of it all, she’d been working to get her high school diploma since she’d missed so much school while living on the streets.
She had hoped to go back to school at some point to get a degree that would enable her to earn a better income. She’d settled on nursing as the career she wanted, even though she knew it would be hard work. Unfortunately, Lorne’s death had forced her to abandon all those plans.
Now, she did everything possible to take care of Timothy, saving what she could to stave off financial ruin should the unexpected happen—such as needing a new apartment or a car repair. Without the extra shifts with their extra tips, money was tighter than ever.
It felt as if she’d wasted her solitary hours while Timothy had been with Tristan because, at the end of them, nothing had changed. All the numbers, all the sacrifices, all the bills. None of it changed anything. Except that on top of it all, Christmas loomed, and while just a few weeks ago she’d had high hopes for what she might buy for Timothy, that was all gone now.
As she lay in bed under her heavy blankets, Shayna felt her loneliness more acutely than ever. No Lorne. No Lisa. She was alone in ways she had thought she’d left behind when she’d finally gotten off the streets. Yes, she had Timothy, and he had to be enough.
“Are you awake, Maman?”
Shayna heard the soft whisper and felt the warm press of Timothy’s small body against her arm, his head on her shoulder. She didn’t need to look at the clock to know that it was nine o’clock. That was the time they’d agreed that he could wake her up on a Saturday morning if she hadn’t already woken up on her own.
“I’m awake.” She lifted her hand and ran it through Timothy’s hair. “How was your time at the hockey game?”
“It was amazing,” Timothy said, his body tense with excitement.
Together, they lay under the thick blanket as he recounted all that had happened. Detail by detail. Things like the fact that Tristan’s brother had once played in the NHL, and that two of his brothers were identical twins. And then there had been every detail about what he’d learned about the game itself. Anytime Timothy learned about something new, he soaked up the information like a sponge, and it was no different with hockey, even though it was a sport that he’d never had much interest in before.
Finally, his words ran out, and his focus shifted to his hunger. Together they crawled from beneath the warmth of the blanket and headed into the kitchen. Timothy helped Shayna gather the ingredients to make a small batch of pancakes. There would be no whipped cream, but he was happy to settle for syrup instead.
Between the two of them, they ate the six small pancakes as Timothy talked more about his evening and his hope that he could attend another game.
“Will you let me go?” he asked as he set his fork down on his empty plate. “If Tristan asks me to go again?”
“Depending on the night, we’ll see,” Shayna said as she stacked their plates.
Timothy got to his feet and carried their dishes to the sink. Though they had a dishwasher, when it was just the two of them, they would do the dishes together. Her washing and rinsing in hot water, him drying and putting away the ones whose spots he could reach.
“Should we work on your science project?” Shayna asked once the dishes were done.
Timothy nodded. “I’m still not sure which one I want to do.”
“Then let’s go over the rules again and make a list of options.” Though projects weren’t her favorite things, Timothy seemed to enjoy them. At one time, it was something she’d imagined Lorne doing with their son, but now that—along with every other thing pertaining to Timothy—fell on her shoulders.
Still, putting aside the looming housing situation, there was nothing more she’d rather do on a cold Saturday morning than hang out with Timothy, doing whatever he needed or wanted to do.
Timothy beamed up at Tristan as they entered the classroom along with the other boys. Tristan hoped that the boy remembered the brief conversation they’d had on Friday night over pancakes and a burger. He hadn’t wanted Timothy to come to the class, sharing all the details of their time at the hockey game. In no way did he want the other boys to know, to accuse him of playing favorites even though that was clearly what he had done.
In the class, they talked about Noah, and Timothy didn’t say a word about the game, even when a couple of the other boys mentioned having been there. Tristan wasn’t sure how Timothy kept from spilling the beans about having also watched the Jets play—from a boxed seat, no less—but he did, and Tristan was proud of him.
When he followed the boys back into the gym after class, Tristan found himself looking forward—perhaps more than he should have—to seeing Shayna again. When she showed up shortly after the end of the service, Tristan could still see the tension on her face, even as she smiled briefly at him before turning a broader smile at Timothy. She wore a pair of black slacks and a white sweater over which she’d draped a light blue paisley scarf.
“Would you come to my science fair?” Timothy asked as Shayna handed him his coat.
Tristan glanced at Shayna, but she didn’t object to his question, so he asked, “When is it?”
“Not until the end of January,” Shayna said, tugging Timothy’s knit cap over his dark hair.
“I should be able to make it. You’ll have to give me more information on the date and time so I can make sure to put it on my calendar.”
Timothy smiled. “We will. I still haven’t decided what I’m going to do, but Maman and I have some ideas.”
“I’m sure whatever you decide on will be great.”
As Timothy concentrated on doing up his jacket, Tristan turned to Shayna. “Can I give you a call later?”
Normally, he wouldn’t ask a woman permission to call her, but somehow, something in Tristan’s gut told him to do it with Shayna. Each time he saw her, each time they talked, Tristan felt as if more and more was at risk. He didn’t want her to shut him out of their lives for doing or saying the wrong thing.
He understood why she would be leery of strangers. He understood why she felt so responsible for Timothy. He just hoped that some day soon she’d realize he was in their lives as a friend, not a threat.
Her brows drew together for a moment before she gave a quick nod.
“Good. I’ll talk to you later than.”
Once they’d left, Tristan went to find Danica and Sierra. He’d given them both a ride to church earlier, and now the three of them would be joining the rest of the family out at their parents’ home for dinner. The two of them had moved into the two-bedroom apartment across the landing from Tristan’s. They were both attending university—Danica planning to be a music teacher, and Sierra studying to be a nurse.
“So are you going to come with us?” Hannah asked Tristan a short time later as they sat around the large family table. “I’m sure Jason would love to have you join him in the car as we tour the lights.”
“I’m not sure if I’ll be taking up space in your car or not, but I think I’ll probably be there in my own car.” Tristan took a piece of roast from the platter Hannah handed him and put it on his plate alongside the mashed potatoes and vegetables already there. “I might have some company that would require me to have a vehicle of my own.”
“Oh ho,” Hannah said with a grin. “So it’s like that, is it?”
“No, it’s not like that,” Tristan replied, keeping his tone calm. He hoped to avoid protesting too much. That would only raise suspicion on the part of his siblings. “I thought the little boy I took to the hockey game on Friday night might enjoy seeing the lights. I haven’t asked his mom yet, though. She might still say no.”
“That’s the son of the man who was killed a few years back?” Hannah asked. At his nod, she said, “I remember Ryan sharing about it shortly after it happened. How did you meet him?”
As they ate, Tristan shared how his life had intersected not once, but twice, before he had made an overture of friendship to Timothy and then his mother. He kept his voice low, not necessarily wanting—or needing—the input of the rest of his family on the situation. Sharing the details of what had transpired between him and the Caron family with Hannah seemed easy since he’d already spoken to Ryan about it.
Later, after returning to the apartment building with Danica and Sierra, Tristan placed the call to Shayna. He had no expectations that she would agree to what Tristan planned to ask, but he had nothing to lose.
“What can I do for you?” Shayna asked after she answered his call.
“I wanted to know if Timothy—and you, too—would like to go with me to view the Christmas light display this evening.”
“The one out at the Downs?”
“Yes. A bunch of my family is going, and I thought maybe you and Timothy might like to ride along with me.”
“It’s a school night,” Shayna said, hesitation clear in her voice.
“Yes, but we’ll go early enough that you should be home before seven-thirty.” Tristan wanted—as always—to keep from pressuring Shayna, so he added, “Why don’t you think about it then let me know? I’d need to pick you up around five-thirty, if you’d like to go.”
“And you want me to go along too? Not just Timothy?”
Tristan felt as if there was a trap in her question. “I thought you might like to see the lights as well, but if you’d rather have a bit of alone time, I’m happy to have Timothy come along by himself.”
“Okay. I’ll get back to you in a bit.”
“Great. Talk to you later.”
He was a bit disappointed that she hadn’t readily agreed to his invitation. Disappointed but not surprised. Shayna had yet to be completely at ease with him, but he hoped that in time, it would come.
Though he knew it wasn’t wise, he found himself captivated by Shayna Caron. She appeared to have a bit of a prickly outer shell, but he could see through the little cracks in that shell to a softer person beneath. Those cracks usually showed most when she was around her son. That was why he wanted her there to view the lights. Maybe there would be more cracks, or maybe the ones he’d already seen would widen.