Lacey

I HAD AN IDEA the next day would be awkward, but I would not feel the slightest bit uncomfortable. I'd spent years training myself to shock and to rise above any embarrassment and it worked. I was the master of camouflage and very rarely was it that anyone knew how I truly felt... even my own best friend. Although she knew me well enough to know the opposite of what I usually portrayed was the truth. I was cunning, devious and adept at getting whatever I wanted. I should get an Oscar for getting through life, I was an actress. Feelings are powerful and private, that is what my mom always used to tell me when I broke down over some boy that didn’t want me. Hold those cards closer to your chest and be prepared to wait and then Lacey Belle, you’ll reap the rewards. At fourteen I thought she was crazy, at twenty-eight I knew she was a genius.

I went to the house as usual for breakfast and Alex couldn’t meet my eye. Probably a damn good job because as soon as I saw him, the things he had done to me last night replayed in my mind and I felt a little flush, which never happened. I saw his arms bursting out of his t-shirt and remembered how he’d hovered about me, flexing those biceps as he pounded into me. The dude may not have used many moves last night but the ones he did made me scream. I was used to guys that were toned from the gym, hard bodied and used to squats in a controlled environment. Alex was different to that. He was hard-bodied, tall and lean in the right places but due to hard work and not the gym. His arms were built from something, but I had no idea what... it wasn’t typing at his desk. His cock was huge, and he knew how to use it. I was glad he couldn’t catch my eye.

I grabbed a coffee from the kitchen, “Morning, hun.” Mabel said with a smile.

“Hey, Mabel, can we talk after breakfast? I’d like to float an idea with you,” I raised an eyebrow and she wiped her hands on a tea towel that was attached to the apron tied around her waist.

“Sure, sweety,” she smiled, “I’ll just make some more eggs and be with you when the craziness calms down.” I nodded, turned to walk outside and almost bumped into Alex.

“Hey,” he half spoke and half sighed, he coughed awkwardly and added in a deeper voice “morning!”

“Good morning, Alex.” I said cheerily with a calm and confident tone, although my heart was hammering in my chest. I was the master of disguise and camouflage and although the guy was pounding into me only twelve hours before, no one would know. He was acting a little sketchy though.

He nodded at me curtly then walked around me to get to the sink, Mabel was busy cooking at the island hob in the kitchen, and so I took my coffee and moved back outside. Sure, the sex had not been a great idea, but it was awesome and my whole dating history seemed to be checkered with less than ideal choices, so why change now?

I found Johnny and Juan sat next to each other at one of the benches and sat opposite them. “Hey, guys,” I smiled easily.

“Hey, boss lady,” Johnny returned my smile, “how’s Celebration Falls treating ya?”

“Well despite the lack of shoe stores and somewhere I can get my hair done and a mani-pedi, I’m okay,” I shrugged and sipped my coffee.

“My girlfriend gets all that stuff done a coupla towns over,” Juan told me. “You want me to get some details?” he asked.

“Sure, oh, Juan, that would be awesome, thanks.” I grinned widely at the thought of getting my hair dyed and trimmed. It needed to be preened or else I’d start to look like a crack whore who’d run out of bleach.

Just then Alex walked behind the guys and they turned, “Hey, Alex.” Johnny greeted him. “Sara acting up again?” he asked.

Alex glanced at me and I shrugged, I hadn’t said a word. Johnny looked between us and then to Juan, “I just noticed you drove them to the bus stop this morning, that only tends to happen when she’s being hard work.”

“Right,” he relaxed his stance a little, “just need to keep a tighter leash on her, she thinks she can date.” He snorted through his nose and shook his head.

“How old do girls need to be to date?” Johnny asked no one in particular but then looked round to me.

“Don’t ask me,” I held my hand up and pulled my bottom lip into my mouth, meeting Alex’s eye. “I dated at fourteen, but I guess I was a tearaway.” I widened my eyes, and the guys laughed.

“Well I dated in high school,” Juan added, “but I have no idea how old I was.”

“Anyway,” Alex cut through the talking, “she was wearing makeup and a short skirt,” he coughed awkwardly, “so she’s grounded until she starts communicating.”

“Oh, bro,” Johnny sighed, “you got your hands full with these kids, you need a night out man. Get a babysitter.”

“Mabel would do it,” Juan said, “or I could ask Anna?” He looked to me, “my wife.” He said to make sure I knew who he was referring to. “You deserve a beer.”

“I’m good,” he told them gruffly, “it’s good, I better get the staff meeting started.” He moved away from us and I smiled at the guys when they turned around to face me.

“You should get him to take a break, Lacey,” Johnny said, “tell him you need a tour of the town bars.” He grinned.

“Hey, he’s your buddy and from what I can tell... a hermit.”

Juan laughed, “how many twenty-five-year-olds you know run a farm and have two kids?” he blew out a breath, “the guy is maxed.”

“Morning everyone,” Alex started his morning team meeting, and I watched intently as his Adam's apple bobbed in his neck whilst he delivered his speech with authority and everyone was held captive by his words. He was the oldest twenty-five-year-old I’d ever met and after the night before I was now licking my lips imagining his body under his blue jeans and white t-shirt combo. It was ridiculous, I’d definitely had hotter, and maybe it was because he was the only offering around but I found him pretty damn sexy.

After the meeting I moved to the kitchen when everyone else dispersed. I found Mabel at the sink washing up the remaining cups and plates that has been left behind. “Another coffee?” she asked.

“Sure,” I nodded, “I’ll get them. You sit down.”

“Only a few more,” she grabbed the dish towel and finished putting cups away in the cupboard. I grabbed my mug, a fresh one for her and made us coffee from the pot that was freshly brewed on the counter top.

“So,” she smiled and sat at the table as I moved to sit next to her and slid the coffee over to her, “what did you want to talk about?” she asked. She sighed with a weariness that older people had and let out a little moan as she stretched out one of her legs.

“It’s just a business idea,” I shrugged with an easy smile, “you can totally say no.”

“Go on...” she leaned forward on the table.

“Well... I’ve been looking at ways to expand the business and I saw a little farm online who had a bakery and a farm shop, it would increase visitors and potentially our reach.”

Mabel smiled and lifted her mug to her lips, “And what does Alex think?” she asked before taking a sip.

“Hmmm,” I smirked, “he’s resistant to change.”

“I bet,” she nodded, “the Millers used to host all the townsfolk, and Alex’s grandparents, Theo and Natasha, used to host parties all the time. These days the Millers are a little more... private.”

I gave her a sympathetic smile, “I get why,” I sighed, “but I think it would be great to have a shop, maybe start small and that’s where you come in.”

“Yeah?”

“So,” I laid my folded arms on the table, “your beautiful pastry treats and muffins, we could sell them. People go mad for freshly baked goods.”

“They do?” she didn’t look so sure.

“Yeah, can you bake bread? We can hire someone to do different specialties but I think it would be a big draw and get people here, then we could expand and this place could boom.” I grinned.

“You don’t make enough from wheat?” she asked her brow furrowed in confusion.

“Sure, but I guess farming is steady and I’m looking to boom,” I grinned.

“I see you are the booming type, Lacey,” she patted my arm.

“Will you help? I mean are you on the payroll? Because I can add you.” I suggested earnestly.

“Lacey, I’m seventy years old,” she sighed, “coming here each morning gives me purpose. Me and Eric live here rent free and we have enough money.”

“I’ll pay you,” I told her seriously. “I just need help with the logistics, like where it should go, what we can bake and how to get people through the door.”

“Most folks would be up here in a flash just to see how the place has changed since Theo died,” she sighed, “small town gossip.”

“Let them come,” I said, sitting up straighter in my chair.

“Fine,” she grinned, “I’ll help but Lacey, I know you’re the boss here now, but I love Alex like he’s my own grandson so please make sure he’s okay with it all.”

“I’ll work on Alex,” I told her, and my body heated at the thought. She narrowed her eyes like for a fleeting second like she could see right through me and into my dirty thoughts.

“He’s had it tough, none of this was his doing and the guy could with a break.” She stood and took our empty cups with her.

“I know,” I stood too and nodded my agreement, “I’ll handle Alex.” I told her. “Let’s organize some time to discuss further.”

“Any time, honey.” She said with a smile.

 

I left the kitchen and decided to have a walk out to the stables to see the horses on my way back to the cottage to get some work done. I wanted to give my new home girl Crystal a rub and then had to get straight back to some of my clients who were in need of some new investments.  I also had more financials that Alex had loaded onto a USB for me to look into. They seemed to spend a hell of a lot on packaging that I thought could be refined. We’d see; how expensive could packaging be?

Just as I was walking away I heard my name, “Lacey!” I turned to see Alex walking quickly towards me. He was hatless today and so his dark hair was haphazardly wafting around as he walked. He was tall and strong as he strode and I had to rip my eyes away from the muscles evident under the white tee.

“Hey,” I said easily although inside I felt anything but easy. This guy seemed to have me caught up like an awkward teenager, that so wasn’t me.

“Hey,” he reached me and I turned to carry on walking and he kept pace with me. “Look...” he started just as I spoke.

“Alex...” I began. “You go,” I told him.

“Last night,” he uttered quietly and my stomach flipped at the words and the assaulting memories. “Um, it was something that should never have happened, I crossed a line.” He grunted out.

“We both did,” I turned to look at him and he couldn’t meet my eye, “I was a willing participant, Alex.” I said with confidence.

He lowered his voice as if indicating that I should, “It can’t happen again.” He added.

“Don’t worry, honey,” I swatted his built arm and resisted giving it a squeeze, “I’m already married so I’m not planning our wedding or anything,” I teased.

“Lacey, I’m being serious.” He stopped walking, and I stopped too, turning to see his stoic face and his mouth pulled into a hard line. “Can we please just keep it between us and forget it happened?”

I narrowed my eyes, guys didn’t tell me they wanted to forget sleeping with me, guys begged me for repeats and I turned them down. I placed my hands on my hips, “I guess you didn’t have as good a time as I did.” I shook my head and gave him a teasing, easy smile that he had no idea was my pre-strike friendly face. “You don’t have to worry, Alex, your spectacular fuck will be my secret and I’ll take it to my grave.” I tightened my smile and stepped back away from him. He opened his mouth to speak, but I saved him the breath. I held my hand up, “you don’t need to worry, honey, I can get my fix from any number of guys and I’m pretty sure they’ll be begging me for repeats.”

“Lacey,” he sighed, stepping towards me and lowering his voice again, “this isn’t about not wanting a repeat but rather accepting that we should forget about it in order to build a professional relationship.”

“Yeah,” I nodded and turned to walk away to the stables, my heart beating rapidly from the adrenaline of his rejection and the venom he had made pump round my body, the venom that always made me fearless and dangerous at the same time, “you’re right, we both need to act more professional and that starts right now, Alex, no more moody behavior and bullshit tantrums. Later!” I yelled over my shoulder as I walked away. I didn’t look back, and I was very aware that he just made me act like some jilted girl who may as well have just yelled your momma!

 

I spent the day working and hiding myself away in the newly decorated cottage. Late afternoon I did some boxercise and yoga in the garden and contemplated when I would face up to my life and stop hiding in Montana. It was whilst I was musing this and drinking fruit tea that my mom called and asked the same questions.

“Lacey, Dad is worried, he thinks his only sane child is losing the plot,” I sighed and stretched my feet out from the old, wooden garden chair that had been left behind the cottage. There was no yard per se, it was more land as far as the eye could see and the cottage had been placed directly in the middle of it. 

“I’m fine,” I sighed. “I’m having a break.”

“Right,” she took a deep breath, “has Bryan called? Will you guys be giving things another go?”

“No, Mom.” I told her, bored with these questions. I hadn’t told her he was having a baby. It was none of her business and I knew she’d prattle on about how I should have given him a baby. Blah, blah, blah.  “Please accept that it’s over.”

“So, how about you come out to visit us if you need a break from the big city?” she asked excitedly.

“Maybe,” I tried not to get her hopes up, but I had no plans to go home any time soon, “I have stuff to do here, things are a little haphazard and I want to make a few changes.”

“Changes?” she sounded confused, “I thought you were just out there for a break and getting to know the place.”

“And increase the bottom line,” I said, hurt that she never listened intently enough.

“Oh yes sure, money, money, money,” she trilled, “but, how are you?” she labored that word and sounded really concerned. My mom loved me so much, I knew that, and this latest move had shocked and worried her.

“I’m good, Mom. It’s beautiful here. I feel relaxed and I’m not missing the city.” It was only a small lie. I missed the hustle and bustle and the fact I could go to an actual store, but I actually didn’t miss the twenty-hour days and the constant demands on my time. It was strangely liberating.

“I’m happy to hear you’re relaxed. Did you get that picture I sent of Rhodes?” her voice changed to prideful when she spoke of her only grandchild.

“Sure did, he’s a cutie. He looks so much like Ethan,” I told her.

“Right?” she bubbled with delight. “I love you, honey.” She finished with and I smiled.

“I love you too, Mom. Please don’t worry, I’m just trying to figure out where my life is now and I’m not sure it’s even in New York.” I sighed.

“Maybe it will be in Wisconsin?” she said with hope.

“Erm,” I laughed, “I think it’s more likely to be in Hawaii.”

She laughed too, “Okay, sweety, well Dad and I will Skype at the weekend, okay? What are you doing for the fourth? Have you decided yet?”

“Well Jessa is pushing for me to fly out to the Hamptons with the Devereuxs,” I sighed, “but I’ll be a spare part.”

“You will not, just go!” she practically yelled.

“I might do, it’s two weeks away yet so if I do, it’ll just be a few days.”

“Go,” Mom pushed, “maybe Jessa can help my baby get back to normal.”

“I’m fine, Mom, God.” I whined like a surly daughter, “I better go, bye.”

I sighed after our conversation, she wasn’t hard work, she wasn’t too intrusive but when she was worried, she made a point of calling me more. I knew I should be grateful I had my mom—my best friend Jessa had lost her mom two and half years ago. We’d been best friends since elementary school and so losing Tessa Jenson had been like losing my second Mom. I was heartbroken for them all. Tessa never did meet Jessa’s son, Monty. The Devereuxs were having a huge celebration for the fourth in the Hamptons with her husband’s two brothers, their partners and all the parents. Will and his brothers were raised by their grandpa so he would be there too. I guessed I would go, just to get back to civilization for a nano-second and to see my awesome best friend. It was also Monty’s second birthday, so it would be nice to celebrate with them. Also, the Devereux brothers were sinfully gorgeous and seeing them in swimwear would be an added bonus. Jessa had teased me about visiting but it had never happened so I needed to see them all.

I walked back inside, started to run a bath and then decide what I would eat for dinner. My cell vibrated with a message and I sighed as I saw who it was from.

Bryan: I miss you.

Give up dude. It’s worse than over, it’s dead and I won’t ever be calling.

I ate three-minute noodles for dinner as I had zero energy or desire to cook for one, then I'd retired to the veranda with a book Jessa had leant me when I heard an approaching vehicle. Out in the wilds you didn’t hear many vehicles, especially going past my place so I wasn’t surprised that it was a truck I recognized, you had to be pretty determined to drive this way. It was Grayson.

“Hey,” he smiled broadly as he hopped down from the truck. I only wore sweats and a vest to and no makeup but he still seemed pleased to see me.

“Hey yourself,” I said.

“You up for another bar night?” he asked. I watched as he walked up the veranda and the guy I’d seen before, the good looking charmer was still there but compared to Alex he just wasn’t a good guy. Don’t get me wrong, I loved a bad guy as much as the next person, but it felt a little disingenuous even spending time with this guy when I knew he’d fucked Alex’s girlfriend and also I’d fucked Alex. Whoa.

“Sorry, Grayson, I’ve had a super busy day,” I lied, “and I just want some alone time.” Translated: I’d go to a bar but not with you.

“Oh,” he looked crestfallen, “how about I get your number and then I can see when you want to go out?”

I sighed, “Yeah, sorry, Grayson, I’m here to work so I better just pass. I’ll be gone in a few weeks anyway.”

“Gone?” he covered his heart with his hand dramatically and widened his eyes, “do not tell me that the only breath of fresh air to breeze through this town in years is taking off?”

I gave him an apologetic smirk, “I have to get back to my life.” I trilled.

“So, you never did say what brings you here? The Millers renting out the cottage to tourists?” he raised an eyebrow. I wasn’t about to divulge my business to this guy, in fact the more time I spent with him the more he irritated me.

“I just caught a really bad bout of syphilis in the city and needed to recover. My parents know Mabel and Eric so they offered me this place. I’ll be back on my feet soon enough. Then back in the saddle,” I winked. I watched as my information filtered through to his Neanderthal brain.

He narrowed his eyes and was serious for a second then burst into laughter, “I got ya.” He laughed some more and I smiled a little. “So not tonight then, huh?”

“I could have syphilis,” I told him.

“You could but you don’t need a holiday to recover,” he winked at me and I thought touché, maybe the guy did have a sense of humor after all.

“I just need a quiet night, Grayson, but I’ll see you around, hey?”

“Okay, I’ll count on it. Night.” He climbed back into his truck, waved and drove away.

Grayson could have been my type. I had no idea what my type was, but I was sure that I was getting too old for bullshit. I didn’t want some out and out nice guy who pandered to my every whim and I didn’t want to be someone’s asswipe. In fact, I wasn’t sure in that moment if I wanted anyone at all... ever. Hook ups were fine, I never wanted kids anyway and so having a full-time man just held me back. So Grayson could have been a hook up? He certainly wasn’t offering anything more but deep down I had an allegiance with the Millers and he was not a friend of the Millers and hence no friend of mine.