Chapter Forty
Bailey
The air was crisp as Xander extended his hand to help me down the mountain.
“Snow’s coming,” he warned, looking up at the sky.
“Are you sure about this?” I questioned, wondering if he was truly ready to leave his seclusion.
“I’m more than ready,” he assured me with a warm smile.
I took his hand, carefully stepping down the jagged mountainside to the path just below. Once we made this trip into town, to my house, he may not be able to get back up this mountain once it was covered in snow and ice. This was a big move.
“It’ll be nice not having to hunt food all winter for a change,” he laughed.
His life in Molokai had to be much easier, so I knew the threat of people crowding him had sent him into the harsh environment of a Maine winter. The fact that he’d made so much progress over the last several months was amazing. Even his therapist was impressed.
Xander just laughed when she told him how he’d far exceeded her expectations. “I have good motivation,” he said, reaching for my hand.
Lila greeted us with a bundle of balloons and a bottle of wine when we pulled up in front of my house. Xander gave her a tight hug when she ran towards him. I loved seeing the friendship blooming between them. I knew it was good for Xander to start developing more relationships outside of his SEAL brothers.
“I’ll let you two get settled in,” Lila smiled, giving me a tight squeeze.
“Thank you for watching over the house,” I gushed, accepting the bottle of wine she handed to me.
“Not a problem,” she assured me and then waved as she rushed to her own house.
Inside, Xander immediately fell to the couch. He stared around the room, and then turned his attentions towards me.
“Come here,” he growled, extending his hands outward in my direction.
I walked over slowly, letting myself get caught in his grip and pulled onto his lap. I let out a squeal of excitement as my feet lifted from the floor, and my arms wrapped around his shoulders as his eyes buried deep into mine.
“Home sweet home,” he grinned.
“Home sweet home,” I agreed.
He stretched up, pushing his mouth towards mine. Our lips met, and a burst of excitement blasted through my entire body. I loved how he made me feel so alive with his kiss.
“How about I take you out for a nice dinner?” he suggested.
My heart sang with an overflow of emotion. Xander was here, in my house, not just for a night or two, but for the entire winter, and now he wanted to take me to dinner? These were things I never thought possible, at least not so soon. He’d come a long way with his counseling, and I couldn’t’ve been more proud.
“Yes,” I squealed.
He pulled me into him, lowering me to my back on the couch, and pinning me beneath him. I giggled as he delivered quick kisses to my neck, tickling me with his bearded face.
“Are you sure you don’t want me to shave?” he asked.
I shook my head as I stared up at him.
“I love the way it tickles me,” I admitted, reaching up to kiss his beautiful lips.
“Knock, knock,” the female voice pulled us apart and sat us up on the couch.
Mrs. Lemay stood at the screen door, waving at us from my front porch. I wasn’t expecting to see Xander’s therapist here, and from the expression on his face, neither was he.
“Come in,” I called to her, rushing to the door.
“I’m sorry to bother you, but I wanted to check to see how things were going,” she explained.
“They are great. We just got home,” Xander told her, extending his hand for a polite shake.
Home. I loved the way that sounded. When I stayed at the cabin, we called it home. Now here. Wherever we were, we were home.
“So, you are staying here for the winter?” she questioned, as if she didn’t already know the plan.
Xander had told her what we planned to do for weeks, and she’d been helping to ensure he was ready for the adjustment of living in town for so long.
“Any anxiety?” she asked, looking at Xander, and then to me.
“At first. Once we started packing and making the trip down the hill, my nerves settled,” he told her.
“Good,” she smiled.
I offered her something to drink, but she refused. I was glad, since I had no idea what was in the fridge, except maybe water.
“I just wanted to stop by since I saw your truck out front,” she patted Xander on the back and looked to have slipped him something that he quickly shoved into his pocket.
She looked towards me, her smile wide and her eyes curious, and then showed herself out.
“What was that about?” I questioned.
“What?” Xander tried to play coy.
“She gave you something,” I pointed towards his pocket.
His cheeks started to blush red, and his eyes became shifty.
“It’s nothing…just something I needed for tonight,” he sighed.
“You’re not gonna tell me?” I questioned curiously.
He grinned, his eyes danced, and he shook his head.
“In due time,” he replied.
“Let’s get a shower. I’m starving,” he slapped me playfully on the ass to herd me towards the bedroom.
We showered, as we’d grown accustomed, together. He was always so attentive, washing every inch of my body, and helping me with my hair. I loved how his fingers felt as they gently dug into my scalp, massaging the shampoo into my long red strands.
I was disappointed that he didn’t get frisky, but he told me he wanted tonight when we spent our first evening in the house to be explosive.
He teased me with gentle kisses, and of course took more time than needed to wash my breasts and in between my legs.
“A little teasing makes it fun,” he growled, biting into my neck as the soap rolled down my arm.
I dressed for dinner, staring at the pants he’d taken off and placed over the bed. I wanted desperately to take a peek at whatever it was he had in that pocket, but I didn’t want to invade his privacy. Why wouldn’t he tell me?
I was saddened at the thought it may be medication, an anti-anxiety pill to help him adjust. I knew how he felt about drugs and hated that he may have had to turn to them in order to please me.
Xander exited the bathroom, his beard and goatee nicely trimmed. My jaw fell open at the sight of him. Holy shit, he was more handsome than I even realized.
“Is this okay?” he asked nervously.
I nodded, unable to speak. His chiseled jawline and squared off chin were the focal points of his face now, not the scruff that grew in every direction. He looked groomed, sophisticated, and so very sexy.
“You look amazing,” I gushed.
“There’s still plenty to tickle you,” he pointed out, and moved closer.
He gripped the small of my waist and pulled me into his still damp chest. His mouth lowered to my neck, the small hairs still tickled at my skin as he delivered his sweet kisses. I giggled and then pushed him away playfully.
“That’s enough teasing, or you won’t get dinner,” I warned.
Xander didn’t seem bothered by the people in town staring as we walked down the street. He held my hand, glancing over at me fondly every so often, and ignored that the entire town was talking about the mountain man that finally came out of the woods.
The restaurant was amazing, a new place that just went up. It was romantic, high scale, and nothing like what I thought Xander would find comfortable. He ordered for both of us, selected a nice bottle of red wine, and seemed to be in his element.
As we walked out of the restaurant, an elderly man stopped us, introducing himself to Xander.
“I wanted to thank you for saving this young lady, you’re a true hero,” the man said gratefully, shaking Xander’s hand with a robust power.
“Sir, she is the one who saved me,” Xander responded with a smile, and then took my hand.
The night air was cool, but it wasn’t unbearable yet.
“You wanna walk for a bit?” he asked.
I bundled my arms into my coat and wrapped my scarf around my face as I nodded. We held hands, walking through town while Xander pointed out a few of the places he’d like to go. I was going to take him everywhere and let him experience everything.
Finally, he stopped beneath a row of tall trees, all filled with colorful leaves that warned of the change in seasons.
“Are you tired?” I questioned, knowing Xander never ran low on stamina.
He grinned wildly at me, and then reached in his pocket. I waited anxiously to see what it was, for him to explain what it was that he needed for tonight.
A small white box rested in his palm, and as he opened it, he dropped to one knee before me. A beautiful diamond ring glistened against the light from the street lamp, and my heart nearly exploded with happiness.
“Bailey, the day you literally fell into my life, I thought it was a nuisance, an interruption to my peaceful existence. But when you left, I found no peace without you by my side, and my existence was just that, an existence. You gave me life, you gave me love, and most of all, you gave me purpose. I can’t imagine going back to a simple existence ever again. I was life, love, purpose, I want you. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”
My mouth opened, but only a high-pitch shriek escaped. Xander chuckled, looking up at me nervously with his baby blues.
“Yes!” I finally exclaimed.
He stood, took my hand, and slid the ring onto my finger. I melted into his arms, right there on the street in front of anyone who cared to see. It didn’t matter where we were; it was just the two of us when we were together. The entire world just floated away.
STROKE IT
By Ivy Jordan
This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer's imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 2017 Ivy Jordan
Chapter One
Caleb
“Are you even listening to me, Caleb? Because your goddamn stance alone is making me absolutely crazy!”
I looked back at my golf coach, Gabriel, with fire in his eyes. We had been working on my swing all morning, and even though I was an excellent golfer, I was falling apart all morning long, to the exasperation of my coach. He looked like he was ready to murder me, and I really couldn’t blame him. My head hurt from partying the night before, and the last thing I wanted to do at that moment was to hit a ball repeatedly with an ornery man barking behind me. It was enough to make anyone crazy.
The man was a legend, no doubt, in his forties with short dark hair and angry brown eyes that were staring me down. Gabriel had been to the majors a few times when he was in his glory days, and he never let me forget it. He was an amazing coach and had been working with me for most of my career on my swing.
I just wasn’t in the mood for it today. I had been getting a lot of pressure from my parents lately, and I just felt like I was going to blow.
“Move it, Caleb!”
I threw my driver across the driving range, to the surprise of the person next to me, and threw my hands up in the air. “Fuck it. Let’s call it a day.”
Gabriel shook his head. “Yeah, good call there, Caleb. With that kind of attitude, you will win the majors for sure.”
“Don’t start. I get enough of that from my parents.”
“Well, maybe you need to hear it just a little bit more there, guy. Today, you are doing shit, and you need to consider working on your bad days because if you wake up on the wrong side of the bed at the majors, guess what? You still have to find a way to make it a good day.”
I stared out across the driving range. We had already been there all morning, and at that point, all I wanted to do was grab a drink somewhere. Stress was mounting to the point where I could barely stand it.
I knew why Gabriel was riding me hard. I had made it to the majors a few times in my career, but I always choked when it mattered. I was a choker, and it was ruining my career. Nothing was worse than hearing all about it on the nightly news, as well. People were laughing at the fact that I couldn’t seem to get my shit together. Especially since my father was a legend in their eyes.
Why can’t I just be like my dad? I wondered. He never choked, not once; he was always so cool and collected. Never doubted himself, but he had all the doubt in the world for his son these days.
I didn’t know why I choked, but it happened every single time. I had to break the streak, or my career would be over; I knew that much. I just didn’t know how. I had the talent and skill. I certainly had all the resources to get me to the top. I just had to get over the fear, the ever-mounting fear that grasped onto my throat and threatened to kill me as soon as I got to the majors.
Maybe it was because my father was a PGA Tour multi-champion, and he had all the expectations in the world that his son would be, too. My parents had sunk a lot of money, never mind the time and energy, into my career, and in four years, I had screwed it up every single time.
It was essential to my career that I make it this time. Otherwise I could lose everything. Then I would have to listen to my father rant about what a failure I was. That was too much to bear.
I rubbed at my eyes, wishing I was anywhere but there.
“Gabriel, man, give me a break.”
He sighed. “Caleb, what the hell is going on with you today? We really need to work on that swing of yours.”
“Long night.”
“Partying? C’mon, man, at least come to practice with a straight head. I know you want this – the desire to win is practically leaking out of your pores.”
“I do want it. I’ve never wanted anything more.”
“Then, what the hell are you doing partying so much? Can’t you just leave the celebrations until after you win? You need your head straight at all times. The tournament is just three months away.”
“No, I need the freedom. Blowing off steam is the only way I don’t lose my mind at this point.”
He nodded his head slowly. “Is your father giving you a hard time?”
“When is he not giving me a hard time? It’s a daily event.”
“He just wants what’s best for you.”
“No, he just doesn’t want me to embarrass him. He can’t figure out why his only son can’t make it to the top like he did.”
I turned when I heard a phone ringing. I made my way to the cart to dig around in my bag. Pulling out my phone, I saw it was a call from my father. Speak of the devil, and he appears, I thought. I clicked on the green button and said hello.
“Caleb, how are you?”
“I’m good, Dad; how’s it going?”
“Are you out with Gabriel right now?”
“You know I am.”
“Good. That’s good to hear.”
“What can I do for you, Dad?” I looked over my shoulder at Gabriel, who was watching me intensely.
“I’m just calling to let you know I would like you here tomorrow for dinner at the house.”
I groaned inwardly; I wasn’t in the mood for any of it. “I don’t know if I can make it.”
“Caleb, I insist. The majors are right around the corner, and I would like to have a game plan ready. I want to make sure that you are preparing for it properly.”
“Geez, Dad, I’m not a kid. Besides, Gabriel has it under control.”
“Oh, there is much more to it than just getting your swing ready. Be here at seven.”
I hung up the phone without another word. The man aggravated me to no end, but there was no point in dragging on the conversation longer than I had to. We both knew I would be at dinner the next evening whether I wanted to be or not. There was no point in arguing with my father – he got his way, no matter what.
I could just imagine the kind of plan he had in store for me. He was adamant that I was to go to the top at all costs. Maybe then he would be proud of me.
I sighed as I started walking back towards Gabriel. I was under a ton of pressure to perform in the majors, and if it didn’t go well for the fourth time, I wasn’t sure what I would do. I needed to get over the fear of failing; I just didn’t know how.
It came up on me so quickly, and no matter how much I wanted to win, I couldn’t get past the feeling. It seized me like a vice, and even though I knew I had the skill and talent to be the best, I would stand there frozen, unable to do exactly what I had been trained to do. It was the most helpless feeling in the world. When it was all said and done, I was just left with regrets, knowing I could have made the shot if I just didn’t choke on it.
That was my Achilles heel, and I didn’t know how to get past it. I would need to if I was ever going to win, however, and get a sense of accomplishment, not to mention make my father think he hadn’t wasted his time on me.
I was no hack – hell, no. I had led all the tournaments to greatness every single time. It was just the majors that killed me. It had been three years of embarrassments; three years that I could have seriously lived without.
This year had to go right. I wanted it so badly that I could feel it in my bones. The ache of wanting literally lived beneath my skin, and I needed this year to be different. I couldn’t stand any more embarrassments. I was not the “boy who choked.” Gabriel was right about one thing: I needed to get my head on straight and figure out why I was choking, what was stopping me from getting to the top.
I was rubbing my temples when I got back to where Gabriel stood.
“Was that your father?”
“How could you tell?” I said sarcastically.
Gabriel nodded; he knew what it was like to go to the top. The expectations involved, the stress. But he also knew how great it felt to win, to prove everyone wrong to stand there knowing that you were the best. I had no idea how that felt, despite all my accomplishments during tournaments.
Despite his barking, I was happy to have Gabriel at my side. He had been there with me from the beginning and genuinely wanted me to succeed. I wouldn’t be where I was in my career without him, and for that, I would always be grateful.
“I know your father can seem… Well, like a dick at times. But he loves you, Caleb; he just doesn’t have great ways of showing it.”
“Well, winning the majors would sure get him off my back.”
“Then that’s what we are going to do.”
I smiled. “Hey, Gabriel, why don’t you come out with me tonight? There’s a new club opening on the beach tonight, and it’s going to be one hell of a party. You would have a good time. Hey, you might even meet someone.”
He laughed. “Oh, I do pretty well for myself.”
“I bet you do. So, what do you say? Come; everyone is going to be there.”
“I’m not sure. Maybe. I’ll think about it. While we are talking about it, I should warn you to not get up to any shenanigans tonight. The closer we get to the majors, the more people will have their eye on you. If you are getting into anything nefarious, you could get yourself in some hot water – and not just with your dad.”
“C’mon, Gabriel, don’t lecture me after I invite you out.”
He chuckled. “I’m not. I just want you to protect your image, at least for the next three months. People are watching you, Caleb, whether you care or not.”
“I think you worry yourself too much.”
“Maybe. Maybe not. Let’s work on that swing for another thirty minutes, and I’ll think about your beach party.”
I smiled and got back into position. I could give Gabriel another thirty minutes of swinging if it meant I could have some freedom for the rest of the day. To hell with the people watching me. Who did they think they were, anyway?
I was in control of my own destiny; I was sure of it. I would get past my issues and win the majors. I had to. But I wasn’t about to let anything get in the way of feeling free and having my fun. It was the only thing that made me feel better these days, especially when people were talking about how I was going to play this year. They were all just sitting there waiting, wondering if I was going to choke again.
Well, they could talk all they want because this year was going to be different. It had to be; it just had to be.
I was going to go out that evening and not worry about anyone. Gabriel was way too overprotective. He could probably do with going out and having a good time. Fuck it all. They could watch me. In fact, I would let them watch me.