Andre
I feel out of place at the Pony Brooke Cafe, but when Kristel called me an hour ago, she almost sounded frantic. My arms folded across my chest, I sit there in one of the outdoor chairs with my biker boots propped up on the table while I scan the sidewalks and streets for Kristel. She always seemed so sure of herself at the bar, even among the boys. What could possibly have her so worked up now?
“Hello, sir. Can I ask you to take your shoes off the table?”
The waitress stands over me with her arms crossed. I tilt my head and look at her before I blow a bubble with my gum. After a few seconds, it pops. It’s immature, I know, but it usually gets the point across.
“I really don’t want to ask you to leave, sir. Shoes are very unsanitary, and –”
I tilt my head and glance over at her. “Bird shit’s not sanitary, either. Do you tell the birds not to do their business near the outdoor tables? What about the people who smoke and flick ash everywhere? I don’t see you telling them anything. Where are the signs?”
She purses her lips and looks undecided. After a moment, she rolls her eyes and walks back inside. I stare after her, then smirk and tilt my head back to stare up at the sky. “Come on, Kristel… where are you already?”
“Right here.” She leans over and looks down at me.
With a yelp, I jerk up to my feet and nearly head butt her in the process. “What the hell, woman?”
She giggles at me and plays with a long strand of blonde hair. Even though she’s smiling, I can tell something isn’t quite right. Her eyes have a strange haze to them, as though she’s sick or anxious. I can’t tell which.
“I made the big, bad Andre Zelnick sound like a girl. Do I get some kind of reward for that?”
I smile at her, but take her hand. “Enough with the tough girl act. What’s going on?”
Her shoulders slump, then roll back in what I can only assume is a shrug. She sits down at one of the chairs, and I can hardly stand the way she looks at me. I know something is wrong, but ever since that night at the bar, all I’ve wanted to do is ravage her until the only thing she knows how to say is my name.
“Why are you being so nice suddenly?” She looked down at my hand, which still has hers.
“I can be a nice guy.”
“I’m sure that waitress feels the same way.”
I offer her a tight little smile and slowly release her fingers. She clutches at my hand, though, and takes it in both of hers. “I have something really important to tell you, Andre.Really important. It’s not something you can just turn your back on or beat the hell out of if you want it to go away.”
A frown touches my lips, and I narrow my eyes on her. She’s scaring me with all this talk. “All right. Out with it then.”
“I’m pregnant.”
My jaw slackens, and I stare at her as though she’s just turned into an alien in front of me. No words come from my mouth. I honestly don’t think I can speak. She has got to be joking or out of her mind. There is absolutelyno way she’s pregnant.
When the words do finally come, they’re full of mockery and disbelief. “Is this a joke to get back at me for something I did way back when?”
“No.” Her voice is very soft. “I wouldn’t joke about this. It’s too big.” She swallows and looks away from me. “And I haven’t had sex with anyone except you since that night at your bar.” She traces her fingers across the top of the table before she moves to sit down next to me. Her eyes are on the table. She looks like she’s about to pass out.
“Waitress?” I call out to the woman who wanted my feet off the table. She gives me a nice, long glare, but walks over to us anyway.” What do you want?”
“A glass of water and a glass of apple juice.” I pause, then add, “please.”
“Fine.” She stares at me as though it’s supposed to scare me before she turns on her heel and walks inside.
“Okay, Kristel?” I look at her and give her hand a squeeze so I can get her attention. “Do you have proof you’re pregnant? How do you even know?”
Her nostrils flare as she draws in a deep breath. “I went to my parents’ house in the suburbs for dinner last night. They invited me because they hadn’t seen me in a while, so I went even though I didn’t want to. Everything was going really well until it was almost dinner. And then…” She looks at me. “I started throwing up. There was so much, I don’t even know how that could happen. I don’t throw up, ever. Or I haven’t in a really long time. I also missed my period this month, which hasnever happened before.” She uses one of the napkins on the table to wipe at her eyes. Is she crying? “Will also told me I’ve been moody lately. He didn’t really elaborate, but that’s the third thing.”
The evidence is piling up, and I don’t even look at the cranky waitress when she sets the water and the juice down at our table. “So you threw up, you missed your period this month, and you’ve been moody? Is that it?”
Kristelgives me the same kind of glare the waitress did earlier. “Are you actually for real? Don’t you knowanything? I’m sitting here, scared to death, and all you can ask me is, ‘is that it?’” She shakes her head and looks away from me. One of her hands swipes through her platinum hair, and I can see her jaw growing tighter. I honestly have no idea what to do, and that’s a very new feeling for me.
“About women, yes… about pregnancy, not really.” I figure now is as good a time as any to be honest.
When she looks at me, the glare is gone. “Neither do I.” She sounds defeated. One of her hands releases mine and lays across her flat stomach. She stares down at it and swallows. All I can think about is how much I want to taste the hollow of her throat or slide my face against that silky hair of hers.
“You look really nice today.” The words sound awkward. I’m not good at this at all, and I’d much rather have her pinned underneath me with my cock inside of her. It doesn’t matter where. For me, that’s always been the easiest option. There’s a reason I don’t commit to women; there’s a reason why relationships have no place in my world.
“Thank you.” She glances at me, but she still looks scared. “There’s one more thing…” Her chest rises and falls beautifully with the deep breaths. “I took a pregnancy test this morning.”
My heart starts to pound. I lean toward her. “And?”
“And… it was positive. I have it in here… in my purse somewhere.”
As she pulls away to open her purse, I grab her by the wrist. “Kristel. Wait.” I feel her pause. “If it really is positive, what do you want to do?”
“I don’t know.” Her wrist pulls away, and I watch as she opens her bag and pulls out a paper towel; something is wrapped inside it. I barely breathe when the paper towel is opened to reveal the pregnancy stick.
The color, I’m sure, drains from my face; it’s positive. “Holy shit, you weren’t kidding.”
“No… I wasn’t.” She shifts into the back of her chair, and her hands fold protectively around her body. I’ve never seen her like this, but I can’t actually blame her.
“Are you going to give up the baby?” The question feels like a kick to my stomach, but I make sure to keep my face as neutral as possible.
“I really want to… but I don’t know if I’m ready. I’ve just started college, and I’m living on student loans. To be honest, I’ve never even considered if I wanted a child or not. I don’t even know what I want to do with my life. And I’ve just joined…” She catches herself. “I’m with you now. I’m part of your family. The last thing I want to be is a hindrance or someone who could compromise what you have.” There is a long break between her words, and I think she’s done talking until she asks me, “what do you want to do?”
I press both of my hands against the top of the table and look beyond Kristel into the café. People come and go from the little place; they have no idea about the immense conversation happening right next to them. “I don’t know. But Kristel… a baby?” I shrug and even cringe slightly.
Her hands rake through her hair again. She stares down at the table and grips the roots, and I can tell that she’s fighting hard not to cry. I don’t think she wants to show any weakness. “I know. I know. Getting rid of it seems like the most logical thing to do, but it’s a life. It’s growing inside me right now. You and I were once just like this.” Her hands go to her belly and splay there.
“Do we have to decide right now? Right this instant?”
“No. But we have to figure out something soon. My parents are going to be moving into their new house in a few days, right after the weekend. Their place is close to my college, so I won’t be able to keep this from them for long.”
“Isn’t that a good thing, though?” The lightbulb starts going on in my head. “You could just give the baby to them and they could raise it. You could keep going to school while you train with us.”
She smiles at me, but it’s far more sad than happy. “That sounds like something out of a dream, Andre. And it will never happen. If I have this baby, it will be on me to take care of it. You won’t be able to with everything that you have to do. I’ll have to give up everything. And I have no idea if it would be worth it.” She sits up taller and sips at her water. “I probably sound like the most horrible person in the world.”
“No, you don’t. But we have a few days to figure this out. And we’ll decide together. We can spend the weekend at my house. There’s no one else around for miles. It’s nice and quiet, and no one will bother us. Here’s my address.” I scribble my address and my phone number down on a piece of paper and hand it to her.
“And when my parents move into their new house after the weekend?” She raises both eyebrows at me as she takes the paper.
“We’ll talk about that, too.”
When Kristel stares at me, I can tell she’s not telling me something. In actuality, she’s probably not telling me a lot of things. “What?”
“It’s my dad…” Her hand is wrapped around the glass so tightly that I can see her knuckles. She doesn’t look scared, though.
“Okay… what about your dad? Is he going to come after me with a baseball bat or shoot at me with a shotgun because I knocked up his daughter?” I want to laugh, but I hold it back. “What is he, a cop?” My voice is playful and drenched with sarcasm.
She holds onto the glass tighter before slowly setting it down on the table. Her head tilts to one side, and she stares intently at me. “Yes. He’s a cop.”
I stare at her for a long time; I can’t seem to find the words.
“He’s a cop,” she repeats. Her shoulders are rolling back, and she sits up straight like she’s about to get yelled at; she could be right.
“What did you just say?”
She steels herself some more; even her eyes are narrowed. Kristel is ready for anything at this point; I can see it all over her face. “You heard me. Twice.”
“What. The. Fuck? Kristel, what the fuck?!” I’ve lost my cool in the blink of an eye, but I don’t care. “Your dad is acop?! You couldn’t have told me this a month ago when we met? I gave you my family and you repay me with this? What the fuck is wrong with you?”
People are starting to stare, and Kristel gets up. “There’s nothing wrong with me. Is there something wrong with you?”
I snort and let out a laugh; it sounds hollow. “Do not test me, Kristel. Not now.”
“How about later at your house then?”
I can’t even utter an answer before she gets up and storms off. After she turns around a corner, I look around at all the people who have their eyes on me. “Show’s fucking over.”
Un-fucking-believable. This whole time her father was a cop. I grind my teeth and haul myself to my feet. The glasses, just like everything else, piss me off just by being there. With a snarl, I smack them over. Water and juice flood across the table, and the two glasses clatter to the pavement. One of them cracks up the middle while the other one shatters into pieces. I have to decide, as I stare down at those broken glasses, which one I want the relationship with Kristel to be: the one that can be repaired or the one that shattered completely.