Quinn

You’re sure you want to do this?” Kade asks, taking my suitcase and tossing it in the back of his truck.

Want to, no.

Need to, yes.

I can’t be here right now. Everything reminds me of Zee, and I can’t think surrounded by his stuff. By the memories. And I need to think. Figure out what I’m going to do.

“I’ll only be gone a few weeks.”

Makena bought me a ticket to Ireland. I know it probably seems like I’m running. Doing the very same thing Zee did. Maybe I am. In a way, I get why he did it. Sometimes reality is just too hard to face.

Difference is, I’m not leaving for good. Not abandoning the people who love me.

“It just seems like a rash decision.” Kade shoves a hand in his pocket and rubs the back of his neck. “Especially considering...”

“It’s that reason I have to go.” I bite my bottom lip, trying to hold back the emotion that climbs up my throat.

Kade knows about the pregnancy, but I haven’t told my parents yet, or anyone else.

People always have opinions, and right now, I don’t need any more voices in my head.

“Okay,” Kade gives me a quick kiss on the forehead, then opens the truck door for me. “I just have to make one stop before I drive you to the airport.”

“Abbott said he’d take me if you’re busy,” I say when he gets in the driver’s side.

“No.” He gives me a funny look before starting the ignition, then says cryptically, “Abbott thinks he knows what’s best for you, but his head is too far up his own ass to see the truth.”

“I don’t want any advice,” I warn.

“Not giving you any.”

I hug my arms around myself as we start driving east towards LaGuardia. When Kade turns down a back road, I frown at him. “Where are we going?”

“Just a quick stop.”

I grunt as the road turns bumpy and have to close my eyes to stop my stomach from rolling. I’m starting to think the morning sickness alone is just another punishment for ever allowing myself to fall in love with Zee St. James.

When the truck finally pulls to a stop, I open my eyes.

“Where are we?” A large ranch-style house, that’s currently under construction, sits at the top of a cliff, overlooking the lake.

Kade’s expression remains stoic. “Get out and take a look.”

I frown back, but open the door, sucking in a breath when I see the familiar cove below.

This is Zee’s spot.

Our spot.

I glance back at the house, my head spinning. Where the hell did the house come from? It’s like it popped up overnight. But I guess it’s been weeks since I’ve been here. Maybe someone bought the land...I shake my head. It’s when I see Zee’s bike my brain starts to connect the pieces.

This is his place.

Kade places a hand on my shoulder. “Talk to him, before you leave.”

I shake my head. “I can’t.”

“You have time before your flight leaves.” He turns and starts back to his truck. “I’ll be back in an hour. You still want to go, I’ll take you.”

“That’s blackmail,” I mutter.

“Think of it as tough love.” He grins, then turns and walks away.

Part of me wants to chase after him, to get in the truck and demand he take me to the airport now. But my heart thumps wildly as I glance back at the house, and curiosity wins over fear.

One hour.

I can give Zee that.

As I start towards the house, I hear my brother’s truck pull away, and my heart races a little faster.

The front door is open when I walk up the large wrap around porch, so I walk in.

My breath catches when I get the first glimpse of floor to ceiling windows that look out on the lake. The floors and walls are still bare, just drywall and plywood, and there’s no furniture, but I can see the vision Zee has for the place.

A large double-sided fireplace separates the drop floor living room from the dining room. The entire house has been designed to give the best view of the lake from every angle.

A series of curses comes from down the long hall through one of the open doors. I know the voice, and the frustration I hear in it.

I follow the sound, trying my hardest to fortify my heart. This doesn’t mean anything. It’s just a house. It doesn’t mean he’s changed. He’ll still leave when it gets hard. It’s what he does.

Silently, I walk down the hall.

Bare chested, jeans hanging low on his hips, Zee leans with his palms flat on a makeshift desk in what looks like the master bedroom, mumbling to himself as he reads some type of directions.

The room is large, one wall pure glass with a view of the cove below. In the center of the room, with another fireplace behind it, is a mattress and box spring, white sheets tossed askew like he’d been sleeping there recently.

I swallow hard, and pull my gaze away from the bed, not liking where my thoughts go.

But glancing back at Zee is even more painful.

God, the man is beautiful.

He hasn’t shaved in a few days, and the scruff casts a dark shadow over his jaw.

As if sensing me, he looks over, and I see him take in a deep breath, then let it out slowly. “Quinn.”

“I...uh...the door was open.”

He straightens, his gaze dark, intense, hot, as his eyes roam down my body, then back to my face. That look alone has a whimper pulling from my throat.

Helpless.

That’s what I am.

One look and I’m trapped.

And he’s a predator, taking slow, cautious steps towards me.

“You...” I swallow over the lump in my throat. “You built this?”

His lips twitch. “I had some help, but yeah. It’s what I wanted to show you the other day.”

“You built a house.” I shake my head, still in shock.

“Do you like it?” He moves towards me.

“It’s incredible.”

He holds my gaze. “I’m glad you’re here.”

“I’m leaving in an hour,” I blurt out when he reaches out to brush his knuckles across my cheek.

I beg him with my eyes not to touch me.

“Okay.” His brows draw down, and he pulls back.

“Makena invited me to stay with her for a few weeks.”

“In Ireland?” His frown deepens.

I nod.

His jaw bunches and tenses, but then he nods. “Whatever you need.”

What I need is you, my heart screams.

What I need is to get out of here before I fall back under his spell, my head argues.

Too late for that.

“Before you go, let me show you something?” It’s a question and he waits for me to nod before taking my hand, his large one engulfing mine, then leads me to the room next to it.

It’s bare, nothing special, just a smaller version of the one we’d just left.

“There are six bedrooms,” he says, not releasing my hand. He looks nervous when he says, “I thought this one would be good for the nursery.”

Helpless.

“Zee—”

“Let me talk.” He cups my jaw with both hands and leans into me. “I know I’m a fuck up. Know I’ve done things that are unforgivable. That I don’t deserve you. But if you give me one more chance to prove myself, I’ll do everything in my power to make you happy. I’ll fight for you Quinn. Fight for us.”

Hope mixes with fear. The dreams I’d tried to banish suddenly real. I want to believe him. Desperate to. And, at the same time, desperate not to.

I’ve wanted this, him, for so long, it’s terrifying to believe that he really loves me, that he’s willing to stay and fight.

I blink back tears. “How can you make me happy, when you’re not happy?”

He breathes out roughly. “You’re right. I didn’t know what happiness even looked like until you showed me. That’s why I built the house here. Our spot, Quinn. I want this to be a home.” His expression is strained, pleading, desperate. “I know this house doesn’t fix the past, but it could be our future.”

Like everything Zee is, his words, the house, it’s too much.

His forehead rests against mine, his lips so close, his breath warm against my own.

“I’m sober, Quinn. I fucked up that night. But I haven’t had a drink since. And I won’t ever again. The only drug I want is you. Every day, every night, for the rest of my life.”

Undone.

I never stood a chance.

“I want you too,” I whisper.

He lets out a rough breath, then his lips cover mine, and the emotion that fills the kiss, steals the oxygen from my lungs.

I’m incapable of thinking when his mouth is on mine, when his hands roam across my body and hunger rises inside me like an inferno.

“God, Quinn, I’ve missed you,” his voice is pure agony, like he’s desperate for me.

His lips consume me, teeth nipping, catching my lower lip, before trailing down my neck, the warmth of his mouth searing my flesh.

My hands take on a life of their own and I run my hands over his bare chest, my fingers finding warm, hard flesh.

I whimper as he hurriedly undresses me, our clothes dealt with quickly, until they’re forgotten on the floor. Hands gripping my ass, he lifts me, pressing my back against the wall, secure in the strength of his arms.

Overwhelmed.

Intoxicated.

His fingers stroke across my breasts and our joint moans fill the air.

“Mine,” he growls against my lips. “You’re mine, Quinn.”

I whimper in agreement. I’ve always belonged to him.

“Not fucking you against the wall,” he says roughly, like it’s taking everything in his strength to hold back.

“I want you,” I whimper. Need him, despite the lingering fear that this will all come crashing down on me.

“First time in our home, I want you in our bed.”

Our home. Our bed. It’s too much to hope for.

Secure in his arms, legs still wrapped around his hips, he carries me down the hall, to the room he’d been working in. He lays me down in the middle of the mattress, and I suck in a breath at the tender possessiveness I see in his eyes when he looks down at me.

He spreads my thighs with his knees, positioning himself above me.

“Marry me.” His tone is tight, guttural, emotions flashing in his eyes. His soul bared, open, and this time he doesn’t close the doors. “Marry me, Quinn. Not because we’re having a baby. Marry me because I love you.”

I swallow hard, tears gathering in my eyes. I want to believe him. “You can’t leave when it gets hard.”

“I promise I’ll never walk away from us, ever again. I’m yours, Quinn. Even if you need time. I’m here. I’m not leaving. You want to go to Ireland, then I’ll wait.” He rests his forehead against mine. “I’ll wait as long as it takes for you to fall in love with me again.”

“Stupid man. You think I ever stopped loving you?” I choke on the words. “It’s not possible.”

He kisses my eyelids, then my cheeks, his lips wet with my tears when he presses his mouth against mine.

“Then say yes.” He grips my chin, forcing me to hold his gaze. “Be my wife.”

On a shaky breath, I say, “Yes.”

His mouth crashes back on mine.

“Say it again,” he demands, his voice heavy with hunger.

“Yes,” I say again, and as I do, he sinks inside of me.

The thick width of his cock stretches me, until I’m filled completely with his length, and left gasping. Pleasure ripples, heat spreads, moans rise as he begins to move within me.

He cups my knee, lifting my leg high, penetrating me deeper as he holds my gaze. “Love you, Quinn.”

Pleasure races through me and I cry out with it, “I love you too.”

“Can’t be without you,” he groans.

I know the agony in his words. Being without Zee was the worst torment of all.

Holding onto him, I lose myself in the sensation, and in his eyes, in the promises I see there.

We come together, bodies trembling, souls uniting, and I push past all fear, and believe in the dream he wants to give me. I cry out, lacing my fingers with him as our orgasms rip through the barricades we’d both put up.

My heart cries out. Mine. Mine. Mine.

Body limp and heavy on top of me, Zee whispers in my ear as if he heard my heart’s cry, “You own every piece of me, Quinn.”

And when he lifts up slightly, holding my gaze, I know that I do.