I woke up with a startle. It took me a second to realize I was still on the sofa. Oh, man . . . my neck was killing me! I must have fallen asleep watching the movie. The movie was over, and it was just replaying the title screen over and over.

Gunner? Gunner, don’t go! No! He does, you’re wrong . . . you’re wrong! Gunnerrrrr!

What the hell? I looked over and Ellie was dreaming, if you could call it that. She was calling out my name in her dream. Holy shit! She sounded scared to death. I jumped up, careful not to knock her off the sofa. I pushed the coffee table a little out of the way, knelt down next to her, and started to stroke her hair.

“Ellie, sweetheart, wake up. Ellie, wake up . . . sweetheart, please wake up.”

Fuck! My heart was pounding a mile a minute. What the fuck was she dreaming about and where the fuck was I going? I would never leave her . . . ever.

“Ellie, sweetheart, wake up.” Ellie’s eyes opened suddenly and she looked right at me. Next thing I knew she started to cry and sat up and threw herself into my arms. She was crying hysterically and I was really fucking freaked out. I was going to kick my ass if I hurt her in a dream. I couldn’t possibly fuck this up in a goddamn dream . . . could I?

“Oh my God! Gunner . . .” Ellie cried out in between sobs.

“Shhh, Ellie, it’s okay, everything is okay, I’m here, sweetheart, and I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”

Just then Ellie pulled back and looked at me. Her eyes were filled with tears, and she looked so goddamned confused. She shook her head no for a second and just stared at me.

“No one will ever want me, Gunner, or stay with me . . . ever,” she whispered.

What the hell? My God, what did her mother do to her?

“Ellie, sweetheart, that’s just not true.”

I pushed a lock of her hair behind her ear. My God, she was even beautiful when she was crying. The only thing I wanted to do at that moment was take away her fear and doubts. To show her how much she was wanted. I looked down to her soft, tear-soaked lips and licked my own lips. I started to lean in to kiss her and I heard the front door unlock. Ellie must have heard it also because she quickly pulled out of my embrace and sat back just staring at me with this lost look on her face.

Jeff walked in and surveyed what he saw.

“What’s going on? Ellie? Are you okay? Did you hurt your hand again?” Jeff said as he looked back and forth between the two of us.

“No . . . um . . . no,” Ellie struggled to talk and was shaking her head as if trying to erase a memory. She quickly wiped away her tears and looked up at Jeff. He looked back at her and snapped his head over to me.

“What the fuck did you do to her, Gunner?”

Wait, what?

I quickly stood up and turned to Jeff. “I didn’t do a damn thing! We fell asleep watching a movie and she just woke up crying out from a dream. She literally just woke up crying.”

I left out the part where she was crying out my name. I mean, I was not in the mood to get my ass kicked for hurting her in a fucking dream.

“Jefferson! Gunner has been nothing but a gentleman to me all day and night. I can’t even believe you would think he would do something to make me cry.” Ellie was sobbing even more now. Jeff looked at Ellie and back at me.

“Dude, man, I know you would never, it’s just I walked in here and she’s crying and . . . fuck,” Jeff said as he knelt down at the edge of the sofa. I pushed the coffee table back out of the way.

“Ellie, honey, what is going on? Why are you so upset? Is this about Ryan?” Jeff asked as he moved to sit down next to Ellie on the sofa. Ellie’s face flew up to meet mine. She looked so confused and upset. My stomach was in my throat, and for some reason I felt like I was going to be sick. I needed to go outside and get some air.

“I’m going to step outside a minute and get some fresh air,” I said as I moved to the front door.

“No!” Ellie shouted, stopping me in my tracks.

“This is not about Ryan. I haven’t even thought about him hardly all day. It was just, it was just . . . I guess it was just a nightmare. I . . . I . . . really don’t even remember. I just remember waking up being scared that I was all alone and I lost . . . I lost . . .” She looked back up to me again and her tears started to flow again.

“What did you lose, honey?” Jeff asked as he held a sobbing Ellie in his arms.

She was looking at me with such sad eyes. What the fuck was going on in her head?

“I don’t remember, Jefferson. I just want to take a pain pill and go back to sleep. Maybe that’s why I had the weird dream . . . it was the pain medicine,” Ellie said as she settled down a bit.

“Gunner, can you grab her medicine in the kitchen?” Jeff asked as he looked up at me with a sad look on his face.

“Sure, no problem.”

I walked over and grabbed the old bottle of water I had brought out earlier tonight. I looked up and saw Jeff walking Ellie back to his bedroom. He was saying something to her that I couldn’t make out. She just kept nodding her head in agreement. I would give my life to know what they were talking about.

Holy fuck. What the hell was she dreaming about? When I said I was going to step outside, she just about freaked out. Should I ask her what the dream was about? Maybe I should. I mean she was calling out my name after all. What if I was a prick in the dream? Now I needed to shake my head to clear my thoughts. I walked over to the sofa and grabbed the pillow and blanket I had brought out earlier. I started to walk back toward Jeff’s bedroom. I stopped at the door when I heard Jeff’s voice talking slow and calm.

“Ellie, you cannot let something our mother said to you when you were little dictate your entire life, honey. It was bullshit. She is a miserable person who just wants those around her to be just as miserable. You do deserve happiness, honey, and you will find it. Trust me,” Jefferson said as he leaned down to give Ellie a kiss on the forehead.

A surge of jealousy zipped through me. I would give anything to be the one who was comforting her right now. Fuck . . . I was jealous of my own best friend? The pain I was feeling because she was hurting was killing me. I just didn’t understand it. I had just met this girl. How could I already feel so protective of her? Jeff got up and started to head out of the room but not before he stopped and gave me a slap on the back and a wink.

“Hey, here is your pain pill and a fresh bottle of water, Ellie.”

Ellie looked over at me and gave me a smile that just about brought me to my knees . . . again. Okay . . . when were these feelings going to stop taking over me like this?

“Thank you so much, Gunner. I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me when I woke up. Um, did I say anything while I was asleep?”

Shit, do I tell her what she called out or act like I didn’t hear her calling out my name? “Yes, sweetheart, you did. You kept calling out my name and something about someone being wrong, but that’s all you said.”

I watched her face as I told her what she had said in her sleep. She frowned and looked away toward the window.

“Oh, well, um . . . I’m sure it was probably just because you had been so attentive this evening. I don’t really even remember what I was dreaming about so . . .” She looked back over at me, and I swear I saw tears building in her eyes.

Bullshit. I knew damn well she remembered her dream. Why wouldn’t she tell me? What the hell was she afraid of?

“Well, it doesn’t matter, Ellie. You need to get some rest, sweetheart. Do you need something to prop up your hand? Or need anything else?” I asked her while I shuffled my feet back and forth like I was five years old again. She smiled at me and just shook her head no.

“Thank you again, Gunner, for everything, but I think I’m fine. I really do appreciate it. I’m sorry to keep you up so late at night. I’m just going to try and get back to sleep. I’m so glad seniors have off tomorrow!” she said with a giggle.

I walked over and turned off the bed-side light. “Well, um, good night, Ellie.”

I started toward the door. I turned one last time to see her close her eyes, pull her blanket up, and tuck it under her chin. She was so adorable . . . and I was so fucked.

I walked out and saw Jeff sitting on the sofa holding one beer up to his lips, from which he was taking a long drink, and another beer in his other hand.

“Must have been some date for you to bust out two of ’em,” I said with a small laugh.

“This one is for you. I thought you might want one before heading off to bed.”

I reached over and took the beer out of his hand, sank down in the sofa, and took a drink.

“I have to ask you Jeff, what the fuck did your mother say to Ellie?”

“I always thought it was her story to tell, Gunner, but I’m beginning to think it has affected her more than I thought. When she was seven, my mom was really drunk one night. I wasn’t home so Ellie was there to take the brunt of it. Funny thing was I was spending the night at a friend’s house, which I never did. I just had to get away from her. I mean, I was always trying to get in between her and Ellie. Protect Ellie from our mom’s hurtful words she lashed out all the fucking time. When I left, she was sober . . . was not even drinking a drop of alcohol. I thought things would be okay. She talked about taking Ellie to the park even.”

Jeff ran his hand through his hair and spoke something under his breath. I was pretty sure he had said fuck.

“When I got home the next morning, Ellie was sitting in the corner of the kitchen . . . asleep. Still wearing the clothes she had on the day before. My mother was passed out at the kitchen table. I ran up to Ellie and woke her up. She just started crying as soon as she saw me. She started rambling off how our mother didn’t want her anymore, how hungry she was, how Mommy told her no one would ever love her . . . ever.”

Jeff stopped and put his head back on the sofa. His body started shaking.

“Fuck! If I had only just stayed home that night, it would have never have happened, and Ellie wouldn’t have this messed up idea in her head that she will never be good enough for a guy. She thinks her fate is to be alone. Like my mother.”

Jeff took another swig of beer and looked at me. Tears filled his eyes and I was stunned. In the three years I had known this man I had never once saw him cry, even when he got hurt on the football field.

“Jeff, man, you cannot possibly blame yourself for what your mother did or said. You were ten years old, for Christ’s sake. That is not your fault. You couldn’t save her from every little thing,” I said as a part of me just wanted to go and have a few words with their mother.

“Gunner, be patient with her. I see how she looks at you and how you look at her. I think she is confused by what she is feeling for you. She told me tonight she is scared. She said she is having feelings for you that she never felt for Ryan, and she barely even knows you.”

Holy shit, my heart was pounding. She admitted to Jeff she had feelings for me? Okay, where should I go with this? I felt like I was about to get sick to my stomach so I took another sip of my beer.

“Gun, I see the panic on your face, dude!” Jeff said with a small laugh.

“I’m so glad you think this is funny, asshole,” I took the last swig of my beer and set it on the coffee table. Shit . . . how do I even begin this with him?

“Jeff, I have these crazy feelings for Ellie. I mean, shit. I have never felt this way before in my life. First I thought it was just because, you know . . . it was your sister. You know . . . you want what you can’t have and all. I mean, I literally wanted to beat the shit out of that boyfriend of hers five minutes after I met her. I kept thinking I would do anything to take away her pain while sitting in the urgent care room. I have this insane desire to take care of her. What the fuck is this?” I said as I sat back on the sofa and threw my hands into my hair.

Jeff let out a laugh. “Dude, if I could tell you, I would. I know that feeling of wanting something so bad . . .” Jeff just stopped and stared off into space.

“What’s going on, Jeff? Do you have feelings for Ari?”

“What? What the fuck makes you think that? Ari is like a little sister to me. I mean, she is, she is . . . um, she is annoying as hell. She talks too fucking much, and she drives me nuts. The only feelings I have for that girl are feelings of annoyance!” Jeff said as he got up and took the two empty bottles of beer to the kitchen garbage.

“Okay, ’cause I was a bit surprised at how much you two were going at each other all day. I just got the feeling there was some um . . . tension there,” I said as I wiggled my eyebrows up and down.

“Fuck you, dude. I had a shitty night, and I’m going to sleep,” Jeff said as he headed to the bathroom.

“What? Was Rebecca not her normal, bubbly cheerleader-self tonight?” I called after him. All I got in return was a middle finger shot in my direction.