Jeff dropped to his knees in front of me and started to cry.

“Ari, please don’t do this to me. Please don’t leave me again . . . I beg of you!”

Oh, Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Fucking hell! My heart was breaking in two. I loved him so much, but I was so fucking pissed right now. I wanted nothing more than to get down on my knees and comfort him. But I couldn’t, I just couldn’t. He took something away from me tonight. Something I was never ever going to get back. The chance to give him his first child . . . The thought made me start to cry.

“I love you, Jeff, more than anything, but I can’t handle this right now. I need time. I need to be alone and away from you while you work this out. I’m not leaving you, I just . . . I just need to be away from you.”

“Ari, please. Tonight was supposed to change everything. Please.” Oh God, Jeff, please stop begging me, please!

“I’m going back to the cabin. Please do not come there. I’m going to ride home with Amanda and Brad tomorrow. Please just . . . just . . . just leave me alone for a while, Jeff. If you love me, you’ll just leave me alone.”

I turned and walked away from him . . . again. This time it was so much fucking harder. I knew he never meant for this to happen. It was both of our faults. Well, no, not really. It was that dickwad’s fault for not being able to tell me he loved me and then going on a three-month man-whore mission.

I couldn’t believe he was going to ask me to marry him tonight. Why didn’t my dad just wait to tell me about the fucking restraining order? Why?

Oh, that bitch was smart to get that fucking thing. I so wanted to go right that minute and . . . and . . . Well, I can’t say what I wanted to do ’cause the stupid bitch was pregnant!

That stupid motherfucking son of a bitch, stupid asswipe, dumb mother . . . Oh God . . .

I cried the whole way to the deer cabin. I almost hit two motherfucking deer on the way. Stupid animals. Oh God, I didn’t mean that! What the hell was wrong with me?

I wished Ellie were here. Oh, how I wished I could call her. I pulled up and saw a few small lights on. I was so tired all of a sudden. All I wanted to do was get into bed and sleep. I sat in the Jeep and thought about the first time Jeff and I made love.

It was the night of Brad and Amanda’s wedding. They got married at the Driskill Hotel, and Jeff had booked a room there that night and I didn’t know it. The way he couldn’t tear his eyes off me during the whole wedding ceremony should have been my first clue. Of course the slutty dresses Amanda had us all in, which showed nothing but our cleavage to the max, helped to spur his lust that night. Talk about not being able to breathe all night in that damn dress.

The room had been perfect. Simple but filled with LED votives and rose petals spread all over the bed. It was on the historical side of the hotel and had a balcony that overlooked Sixth Street. There were massage oils and lotions and chocolate-covered strawberries. Oh God, it was magical. It was magical because Jeff was so sweet and gentle. After talking to Ellie, I was not so nervous about my first time. She said it had hurt, but after a while it felt wonderful. She was not fucking kidding.

It was amazing.

I sighed as I got out of the Jeep. Amanda and Heather would probably be coming to get their stuff. I’m sure once they heard what happened they would want to check in on me. I just really wanted to get out of this dress and these boots and just sleep. I opened up the door and almost fell over.

Oh no! No! No! No! No! The whole room was covered with stargazer lilies. I mean the whole room was filled with them. There were bouquets of them in flower vases with blue bonnets mixed in. There were bouquets that had the stems wrapped in a light pink satin. Oh my God. One bouquet was so big it was sitting in an old bucket with other wildflower bouquets. The smell in the room was unbelievable.

It was perfect.

It would have been perfect. I was so mad at my father for ruining this for me. Oh God, Jeff! He must have spent a fortune on all of these flowers.

I started to slide down the door and cry. I put my head down on my knees and just sobbed. I slammed my head back into the door and just screamed as loud as I could.

“Motherfucker!” I ruined everything because I couldn’t just let him explain. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

I sat there and cried so hard I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Oh my God, Jeff. Oh God, why did I walk away and tell him not to come here? If I had only known. Argh! I was so stupid!

“Oh God, why? Why did this have to happen? WHY!” I screamed out. Then I heard a small knock on the door.

That must be Amanda and Heather. I slowly got up and opened the door.

I sucked in a breath of air as I saw the only man I would ever love standing there. He came for me. He didn’t walk away this time.

He came for me . . .