It felt like there was a balloon in my chest. It inflated every time I was within fifty feet of Rachel and I was practically floating now. 

But when we walked back into my parents' empty house, it popped. "Where is he?" Claire spoke my thoughts aloud. 

"Bed," I grumbled, not even needing what Jonah and Gabe called my "scary twin sixth sense" to know that that was where my brother was now. Wrapped in a blanket - in spite of the warm June afternoon - and staring at the wall. 

Claire turned to look at me, cheeks white, "You want me to go?"

"I've got it." I was already climbing the stairs.

His door was shut all the way, latch though hopefully not locked. I knocked hesitantly, then called myself a pussy and knocked louder. "Yo, Finnegan. I've got news."

There was no reply, but I heard the sound of his bed creak, so I knew he was awake. "Hey, I'm coming in." I tested the handle. Not locked. I opened it slowly, giving him time to get used to the idea of me intruding. "How are you doing in here? Jesus." I paused and fanned the door. "It's hot as balls in here, how are you not sweating to death under those blankets like that?" I strode to the window and made to open it, but it was stuck. "Jeez, this is bad, why didn't you tell me? I could have fixed this for you, I think the wood must have swelled or something. All that rain last month." I couldn't seem to stop making stupid observations. He was my own twin brother, but his silence made me feel awkward as hell. "Hey, you know, when we have our own place, we can turn on the A/C without Dad having a coronary, wouldn't that be awesome?"

Finn gave me no sign that he was listening. His dull eyes were fixed intently - but disinterestedly - on the ceiling. 

His room it smelled... sad. The air was heavy and stale, and the faintly acrid odor let me know that he'd stopped showering, probably days ago. It hit me all at once that him coming downstairs and having breakfast with us was just him going through the motions. His laughter was false, his participation was just for show. Nothing was reaching him anymore, except...

I could. "Speaking of which. We found a house," I said, plopping myself at the foot of his bed. He obligingly shifted his feet to give me space, but he didn't say anything, not even when I started telling him all about the secluded place Claire and I had found. "It's so quiet there, Finnasaurus Rex. Exactly what you're looking for. It's even got this little fishing pond and I think we scared some ducks. There's definitely a frog, a loud little fucker too, so you most likely could hear him from the big wrap-around deck that overlooks his habitat."

"Cool."

One word. He didn't even lift his head. Gritting my teeth, I pressed on. "We can schedule a showing, but we should do it soon. I doubt a place like that is going to stay on the market for long. You're probably not the only pseudo-hermit in the Crown Creek area." I waited, giving him time to collect his thoughts, and as I did, I couldn't help but do a sweep of the room. Was he taking his meds and this was just a normal downturn? Did he need a higher dose? Should I be badgering him to go see his shrink? Oh Christ, there was another fight I'd have to gear up for. "Finn?" My brother was still silent, but I knew he was listening, I could feel his tension and knew that the only thing that was keeping him from bolting from this room was the heavy weight of his depression that kept him lying down. "So the only problem is that it's a bit out of our price range, but that's to be expected since it's a pretty kick-ass house." I swallowed and then nodded to myself. Yes. This was the right move. "But I know where we can get the money, man. Easy-peasy. I just have to make some phone calls. Sounds good, right?"

I waited in the deafening silence for him to give me something. Anything. Hell, even a sarcastic comment shooting me down would be preferable to this apathetic silence. "Finn, where are your meds?"

"Fuck off." My brother rolled back to the wall. 

I stood up. "You're taking them, right?"

"Fuck off, I said."

My chest tightened in a snarl of anger. I tried to push it back down again. This isn't him. "I'm going to schedule the showing though. So is there a time that's bad for you? Like maybe you have a doctor's appointment coming up?"

"Beau, I swear to God if you don't leave me the fuck alone I'm going to..."

He drifted off in mid-sentence, already bored with threatening me. I would have taken it. I was used to Finn's temper but this apathy...

I couldn't take it. I turned on my heel and stalked out of the room, burning with the need to move, to run. The tight bud of anger was blooming, and the rushing heat of my blood thudded in my ears. "So?" Claire was right in my path as I stomped into the kitchen, but I veered around her and made a beeline straight for the door off the kitchen that led into the garage.

I wasn't even fully aware of what I was doing or why I was grabbing the hand-axe until I was running full tilt through the yard and straight down to the creek. 

Last month's flood had left our yard a mess that my father was only just starting to tackle. The tangled mass of branches and debris was dry now thanks to the string of warm, sunny June days.

And that made it easy to start hacking. 

The first thud of the axe into one of the branches unleashed something. I blinked away the sudden blurriness in my eyes and then grunted as I split the log in two. "Fuck!" Yanking and heaving, I wrestled the unruly mass back up the hill to the fire pit. I wiped the sweat out of my eye and then went back in again. 

Thunk. Yank. Thunk. Yank. The rhythmic sound of the axe and the hard labor went a long way toward soothing my soul and letting me think clearly again. Clearly enough for the both of us since my brother was in no shape to be making decisions at the moment. It would be up to me to find a way to get the money together. I could do it.

I just had to make a few phone calls. 

As I hacked away at the fallen underbrush, the plan solidified in my brain. One appearance. That was all we needed. Call it a King Brothers Family Reunion, yeah, that had a nice ring to it. Maybe a festival or a one-night only event down in New York City. That was all we needed. It would kickstart our sales, start the royalties flowing again. 

Re-fill Finn's checking account and get him on his feet again. 

The pile in the fire-pit was getting bigger now. I paused, and wiped my forehead again, wishing I had thought to bring out a glass of water. The brush was nearly clear, and the banks of the creek were visible again. I only needed to cut up a few more branches. 

As I split the last big, sprawling oak branch, I tried to keep my misgivings away. This was a good plan, a solid one. And it didn't matter if I actually hated playing pop music. 

Yeah. There it was. My dirty secret.

I hated playing pop music. I loved classical, the swooping grandeur, the meaningful silences.  But I had never said a word because being in a pop band was how I spent time with my brothers, how I kept a watchful eye on Finn. I had sucked it up, believing that it was better that three people were happy and one person was unhappy, rather than make all three of them unhappy just for my sake. When we'd broken up, I'd been sad about losing that closeness, but I hadn't mourned the loss of the music at all. Those simplistic little songs did nothing for me. 

But they paid the bills. And that's what I needed them to do again. 

With one final heave, I sent the last of the branches up to the top of the pile. I paused and massaged the stitch in my side. I definitely needed water now, I'd damned near sweated myself into mummification, but it was hard to pull myself away from the mindless, comforting toil and head back into the house. I knew what I would find there. A worried sister and an uncommunicative brother. And me back in the middle again, trying to make everything right. 

As I trudged back up to the house, my steps got lighter before my brain registered the reason why. 

Music. The sound of my piano drifting out of the house, a simple little chord progression and then—

My heart quickened. "Rachel?" 

I ran full-tilt - not even sparing a thought for my aching muscles - up the sloped lawn. The door off the back deck was closer to the living room where the piano sat, so that was the one I burst through just in time to hear Rachel belt out a perfect high C. She turned at the noise of the door slamming shut, and the corner of her mouth quirked ever so slightly as a happy blush spread over her face. 

I pressed my fingers to my lips. I wasn't going to interrupt. Not this. Claire was working on scales, taking Rachel through a series of warm-up exercises. It was nothing I hadn't heard a million times before, but somehow the silly little "ah ah ahs" and "ee ee ees" sounded like something rare and beautiful when they came from her mouth. She closed her eyes and tilted her chin up as if she were singing right up to the angels she sounded like. The tips of her fingers grazed the top of my piano and I resolved never to polish it again. 

I swore I was only standing there for a minute, maybe two, when Claire closed her book. "We'll leave off there. I don't want your vocal cords to get fatigued."

"Okay," Rachel said, kneeling down to gather her things. 

"Stay!" I blurted, like the biggest, lamest asshole in the world. 

The two of them looked at me, Claire scoffing, Rachel confused. "What for?" my sister asked, and I wanted to smack her. 

"We're having a bonfire."

"We are?”

"Yep. To celebrate the beginning of summer."

"We are?"

I glared at my sister, sending her silent 'not helping!' vibes with my eyes. She widened hers dramatically - and completely obviously. "Oh! Yes! We are! Definitely, yes, we are definitely having a bonfire to celebrate the beginning of summer. As we do. It's a thing that we do."

"You're invited," I said, raising my voice over Claire's fumbling. "We'd love to have you."

The pink was still there in her cheeks, the dreamy expression. I would be kissing her right now if my sister weren't standing there, I knew it. My fingers itched to hold her. I wasn't above begging. "Please say yes."

She licked her lips. "Yes."