I make it back to my hotel room and plop down on the sofa. I need a bath, I feel sticky and gross. I didn’t have anything to wipe myself with, and Zander’s still between my legs. I get up and head towards the bedroom. The lamp is on, and I see a sleeping Kyle in my bed. I take Zander’s jacket off, laying it over a chair.

As I’m trying to figure out how to get the dress off, Kyle wakes up and shouts, “What the hell happened to your dress!?”

I look down at the rip and bite my lip. Kyle jumps up, grabbing my arms. “Did something happen? Are you okay?”

Oh, shit, he’s worried. Seeing the rip, he thinks someone did that to hurt me.

“No, Kyle, I’m fine. No one hurt me. I didn’t even talk to them.”

“Well, then what happened to your dress?”

I blush, and then I see it in his facial expression, he knows what happened. He releases my arms, backing up, crossing his arms across his chest as he begins to interrogate me.

“My, my, little Murphy, did you get laid?” I smile, and he swings his arms. “I knew it, I just knew it.”

He rips the rest of the dress off me and pushes me to the bathroom. “So, who is he, and was it worth it? Wait, was it Mark?”

I laugh and start running the water. “No, it wasn’t Mark.”

“You slut!”

“Hey, I’m not a slut. I’ve never done anything like this before.” I look down in shame. “I just wanted to forget for a little while, and besides, you told me I needed to get laid.”

“Okay, fine, so I did. I’m sorry. I know you’re not like that.”

“Apology accepted. How do you feel? Any better?”

I get into the tub and sit, soaking my sore muscles. Damn, if I’m this sore now, how the hell will I feel tomorrow? I wince, and Kyle gasps. “Don’t you dare try to change the subject. You just winced. Are you sore already?” I blush again, nodding my head. “Damn, that means it’s been a really long time, or he was really big.”

My blushing continues, and he puts his hand over his mouth as he gushes like a little girl.

“All right, all right. It has been a long time, but you knew that.”

“But I want to know, how big are we talking about?”

I laugh and say, “Big.” Then I raise my hands, clenched together, and then pull them apart. As they get further and further apart, Kyle’s mouth drops lower and lower.

“Wow! That big?”

“Yes, it’s wide, too.”

He lays his hand on his chest and says, “Does this dick have just as impressive an owner to go with it?”

I nod my head, then I decide to tell him, “Remember the guy in the lobby? The one that helped me from not falling flat on my face? It was him.”

Kyle puts his arm over his face and fakes passing out. “That man was gorgeous.”

“Yep, everywhere.”

“I can’t take it. Stop, you’re hurting my heart. Murph, that man can tear any dress he wants.”

“I didn’t mean for it to happen. He just…I don’t know, he was just the right mixture of sexy, domineering with a touch of tenderness. I’ve never met anyone like him before.”

“Murph, we need to check your temperature.”

“Why?”

“Because you have never responded or talked about a man like that before. You must have a fever.”

“Funny, asshole. I’m over it, okay? It was just a minor slip of judgment. I’ll probably never see him again, that’s more than likely why I did it. I don’t know I felt safe to be just Red and not Murphy for a night.”

“Red?”

“Yep, I didn’t even tell him my real name. Remember he called me Red in the lobby because of my hair color? I just let him keep calling me that.”

“Well, did you get his name?”

“Zander.”

“Zander, that’s hot.”

I nod my head again. “That’s why I didn’t meet with the Sterns. I was having the best sex of my life, and my dress was torn. I couldn’t meet them like that. So, I left. Zander wanted me to wait for him. He wanted us to continue our night, but I was so embarrassed with how I acted that when he left the room, I stole his jacket and ran for the door.”

“You’re making a habit of stealing things, Murph. Maybe you should slow down before you land yourself in jail.”

I throw my loofah at him, and he catches it, but not till he’s covered with bubbles.

He stands to leave but then turns to ask, “You’re okay, right?”

“I’m fine, just embarrassed.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Murph. You needed to let loose. You’re always so in control of everything, it’s nice to hear that someone took some of that away from you. You need to relax and just enjoy more.”

With that, he leaves the room and leaves me with my thoughts. I did give up control. Who was I? I never let someone take the lead.  What was it about him that I trusted? Because I did, I trusted him. I didn’t even make him wear a condom. That never happens. Whatever it was or whoever I was, it can’t ever happen again.