Chapter 14

Gavin

“Good morning.” I smiled. Big, wide, real. Because for the first time in a long time, I had something to smile about. McKenna was in my bed.

“Thank you,” she whispered, taking me by surprise.

“For…?”

“Last night. For just listening to me. Nobody has done that for a long time.”

I reached over and touched her cheek, knowing what that was like. “Feeling’s mutual.”

Telling her what I had the night before had been a risk. But I’d never expected her to open up to me too—even the small amount that she did.

Slowly, she lowered her lips to my chest, kissing my skin, the spot over my racing heart. My cock jerked to attention. I swallowed hard, watching, curious what would happen next. I could have stopped her. No, I should have stopped her. But that would mean letting her go. And after last night, I wasn’t ready. Likely not ever now.

“This okay?” she asked, thick lashes batting against her cheeks.

“More than.” My voice cracked.

“Good.”

Her fingers joined in on the action, but they had a mind of their own, skimming down my stomach and landing at the top of my boxers. There, she hesitated for a second, waiting for my approval.

Hands shaking, I reached down and tugged my boxers to my knees. Her cheeks went pink as she watched, an adorable shade I wasn’t used to seeing on her face.

But the second she eyed my cock, her vixen ways were back. She inched her hand closer, wrapping it around the base, lips parting as she pressed them against my stomach.

I hissed through my teeth, watching as McKenna’s soft hand began to stroke. One long pull, another shorter one… A dribble of come spilled out of the tip, and that heavenly hand used its thumb to coat the head.

I hadn’t been given a hand job in at least five years. And fuck if I wasn’t suddenly fifteen again, feeling on top of the world.

Not wanting to disturb the beautiful blond on the giving end, I lay as still as possible, my eyes closed, curling my fists into the blanket. My thighs burned as I flexed them in place, but I refused to move. A low moan sounded from my throat though; I couldn’t help it. It felt so good. So tight. So warm. So real.

Jesus. Who was I kidding? This was very, very real.

“Kenna,” I finally said, reopening my eyes to look at her. More than anything, I had to know she was with me. This wasn’t what I’d intended today. Not that I wasn’t pleasantly surprised, believe me. But she’d been pushing me away for five weeks straight. I figured I’d have to take what I got.

Still, I hadn’t expected a good-morning hand job.

Unfortunately, it’d never be enough for me. Which is why I reached down to grab her wrist, stopping her. “No. This isn’t right. We shouldn’t…” I gritted my teeth, hating my morals. Hating how badly I wanted to forgo my need for security and control. To just let myself feel with this woman. To take what I could get.

“W-what’s wrong?” Her blue eyes searched my face when she leaned back.

I sucked in a breath to speak. “You can’t do this to me and expect me to walk when it’s all done. I can’t handle having you leave again.”

That bottom lip of hers puffed out into a frown, and more than anything, I wanted to pull it between my teeth. Still, I waited as patiently as I could, watching as a battle seemed to be waging behind her pretty stare. I held my breath, my chest going tight as I did. I didn’t take relationships with women lightly. Hell, I’d only had one one-night stand in my life, and that was two years ago.

Her hand loosened around my cock, but she didn’t let it go completely. Instead, she looked at me, unsure, waiting…confused most of all.

“What’re you gonna do, McKenna?” I asked, leaning forward to run one finger down her cheek, down her chin, down her neck, stopping right above her heart.

“I…”

“Tell me yes or tell me no. It’s that easy.”

Her lips parted as if she wanted to talk. But before she could, I sat up, leaned forward, kissed her once, and made the decision she obviously couldn’t—raging hard on be damned.

“Time to get up. I promised you breakfast this morning.”

* * *

She ate like a woman on a mission, shoving in food left and right. Bacon, eggs, hash browns, pancakes… And I couldn’t stop grinning across the table at her because of it. She was not just gorgeous; she was damn near glowing with every bite she took. As though it was the first meal she’d eaten in years, the best food of her life.

“You eat like you’re feeding an army.” I took a sip of my coffee. “I’m not going to take it from you.”

Mid-bite, fork still in the air, she froze, face paling. I leaned closer and pressed my hand against her wrist. She startled at the contact, and her fork fell against the plate with a clatter, eggs splattering all over the table.

“I need to use the restroom.” She jumped out of the booth and ran to the back of the restaurant.

It took me thirty seconds before I could take my head out of my ass. And then another thirty seconds to realize it was my job to go after her. I wasn’t good at this romance thing.

Just outside the door to the ladies’ room, I found her sitting on the floor, leaning back against the wall. Déjà vu hit me full force, only this time she wasn’t drunk. Fear had me dropping to my knee in front of her. I cupped her face between my hands.

“What is it?” I asked. Her cheeks were red, her lips quivering. My heart thudded harder in my chest at the sight, the thumping beats reaching my ears. “Talk to me.”

“I…” She blinked, and tears slipped over my fingers.

“That was an asshole thing to say at the table. I’m sorry.”

“No.” She shook her head. “That’s not it.”

“What is it?”

She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth, holding a breath. Once she let it out, she whispered, “Gavin, I’m pr—”

My phone rang. “Damn. Hold that thought.” I reached into my pocket to mute it, but then I got a look at who it was. “I’m sorry. I gotta take this. It’s Collin.”

She wiped at her tears and nodded, pushing up off the floor. “Yes. Answer.” She smiled, but I could see the strain. I knew already which smiles were real and which weren’t. She pointed to the bathroom, one finger in the air. I nodded and waited outside as I answered the phone.

“What’s up, Colly?”

“At the airport. Got an early flight in. Can you come get me?”

“Yeah, of course. We’ll be there in twenty.”

“Who’s ‘we’?” he asked.

“McKenna and me,” I answered, no hesitation. From here on out, I’d make it known to the world what my intentions were with this woman. And I didn’t care what anyone thought or said. I wanted her, and I’d do anything to make her mine.

“That’s real good, Gav. She’s a sweet girl. Reminds me of you in a lotta ways.”

I smiled at his approval. “Yeah.”

Kenna came out of the ladies’ room just then, looking a little more composed. I reached for her hand, gave it a squeeze, then told Collin to hold tight. That we’d be there soon.

We walked back to the table and grabbed the bill, taking it to the register. Kenna stayed stuck to my side like glue but didn’t speak.

Whatever she’d been about to tell me before Collin called was obviously important. But the moment had passed, and the last thing I wanted to do was upset her again.

I’d told her where we were going, and she’d agreed to ride with me, but she was quiet along the way—not the same girl who’d lain in bed with me last night. She was closed off. And I hated it. I wondered if this was what it was like for people who hung around with me.

“Tomorrow morning, I go back to work, but I was hoping you’d go out with me tonight.”

She snorted, the sound loud and abrupt in the space of my SUV. I turned to look at her, frowning.

“You don’t need me. I’m pretty much a hot mess of dog shit.”

I wouldn’t take the bait. She was trying to push me away again. “Maybe I like the smell of dog shit.”

“If you liked the smell, you’d get a dog.”

“Can’t do that. I already have a cat.” I chuckled.

She rolled her eyes, which meant her sass was coming back. “Whatever. Take me out. Just know I am not the easiest person to please.”

I reached down to grab her hand again, this time pulling it to my mouth for a kiss. “Good thing I like a challenge.”

* * *

McKenna

I’m not sure when or how it happened, but somewhere along the way from the restaurant to the airport, and back to the hospital, I’d become a part of Gavin’s inner circle.

I sat in the passenger seat of his SUV, my hand in his as he drove us down the highway. Collin’s feet were kicked up between us on the console, and my elbow and Gavin’s were propped up in front of them. It was weird and awkward, but neither Gavin nor Collin made a big deal out of it, so I let it be, pretending I wasn’t drowning in a sea of testosterone.

“The doctor said her mom wasn’t gonna make it through the day. Addie’s handling it okay, but…shit, I wanted so bad to be there for her.” Collin sighed, and I immediately dug my phone out of my pocket, the pain for my best friend bringing tears to my eyes.

Addie may not have had the best relationship with her parents, but they were her parents. Losing her mom wouldn’t be easy, no matter the situation.

I texted her.

Me: You okay?

Addie: Hey. Yeah, I’m as good as I can be.

I swallowed the lump in my throat, wishing like hell I could be there to hug her.

Me: Text me if you need anything. I’m thinking about you.

Addie: Thx. And BTW? Will you officially be my maid of honor? =)

Me: WTH?

“What the hell?” I said it out loud as I typed it, then looked over my shoulder at Collin.

His eyes were bloodshot red, and there were dark shadows underneath. He didn’t look like a newly engaged man as he stared out his window. He looked like a worried father and boyfriend. Or should I say fiancé?

Gavin’s brows rose. “What’s wrong?”

I giggled, then nodded as I typed my reply, thankful for a little happiness when things were kind of messed up for both of us.

Me: You’re kidding, right?

Addie: Nope.

“Holy shit.” I might have been anti-relationship, but seriously. Holy. Shit. My best friend getting engaged was pretty much the most epic thing ever.

“What is it?” Gavin asked, his gaze bouncing back and forth between me and the road.

“Oh, I don’t know… Why don’t you ask Collin back there if he’s got any exciting news he’d like to share.”

“Damn,” Collin groaned, shutting his eyes. “Addie just couldn’t wait, could she?” Still, I saw the smile on his lips.

“Someone mind filling me in?” Gavin grumbled, obviously annoyed with the secrecy. His grip on my hand tightened a little, and I set my phone on my lap before reaching over to brush my fingers along the back of his wrist. He instantly relaxed…and I couldn’t help but grin wider, knowing I’d been the one to do that for him.

In a way, I had power over Gavin, like he had power over me. And though I knew my confession could break that off in a heartbeat, I was selfish enough to enjoy that power for as long as I could.

“The question you should be asking is who Mr. Collin back there is going to be picking for a best man.”

“What the fuck?” Gavin barked.

I laughed so loudly at the noise that I choked.

He swerved the SUV, trying to reach in the back seat to swat at Collin’s knee, which made me laugh louder.

“So, she finally said yes?” Gavin got the question out through his wide smile. His eyes were squinted, and the corners turned up just as much as his lips did.

A truly happy Gavin was a stunning Gavin. The sight made my lungs squeeze.

“Yup.” Collin smirked, not offering the details a girl needed to know about an engagement. I’d get them from Addie sooner or later, I supposed. This was Gavin and Collin’s moment.

After dropping Collin off at the hospital to see Chloe, Gavin couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. Still, the last thing I expected was for him to ask if I’d be upset if he took me home.

A tiny part of me didn’t want to be left alone, because if I were, the negative thoughts inside my head would start haunting me again. Still, I didn’t want to come across as clingy.

“No problem. I’m probably going to take a nap or something.”

He winked at me, so incredibly playful for the man I had begun to think ran on only two levels in life: sad or broody. “Good. Because I need the afternoon to get some things in order. But I’ll bring your car to pick you up tonight, unless you’ve got somewhere to be today.”

In your arms is what I was stupidly thinking, but I immediately kicked that idea out of my head. God, what was wrong with me? One night in his bed, and it was Pisser Paul syndrome all over again.

Before I could contemplate what he was thinking when he looked at me—what could happen if I let him in the way I had sworn not to let another man in again—I needed to tell him the truth about the baby.

“Kenna.” He squeezed my hand again. “You good with this? Because I can come inside for a little while if you want me to.”

I nodded, turning away so he wouldn’t see the tears forming in my eyes. I had no idea why I was even crying. Hormones? Guilt? Fear?

Letting go of my fingers, he moved his hand to my leg. “Six okay tonight?” he asked, his thumb resting against my inner thigh, stroking.

Again, I nodded, just as he pulled into the lot of my apartment complex.

A few kids were outside, running to the small playground on the back of the grounds. A woman followed behind, hair plastered to her face and a flustered toddler flailing in her arms. I’d never seen her before, but I suddenly wanted to watch her, study her. Learn from her.

“You okay?” Gavin squeezed my thigh and I squeaked, jumping in place.

“Shit, I’m ticklish. Don’t do that.” I giggled, momentarily forgetting why I was upset.

“Yeah?” One dark eyebrow rose, and a teasing smile tugged up the side of his mouth. “Good to know.”

“Um, I don’t like to be tickled.” I pursed my lips. “Why would you need to know that when any further tickling could end with a junk-punch?”

Gavin dropped his head back against the seat. “Trust me, if I tickle you…” He licked his lips. “You’ll be begging me to never stop.”

I sucked in a breath, my fear of his tickling gone. In its place was curiosity, paired with desire and an undeniable warmth growing between my thighs. My already sensitive nipples tingled against my bra, and I secretly hoped we could start the tickle game right there in his car.

Apparently, pregnancy did weird things to my already active libido.

Gavin’s smirk faded into heat when he looked down at my chest. I squeezed my thighs together, trapping his hand in, totally not thinking about what it meant, just needing him to ease the building pressure, the ache that had been in place for weeks now. I’d missed this—missed what he could do for me.

And I was done waiting.

Forgetting all my internal battles, I lost myself to his touch, urging his hand up higher. “Please.” I shut my eyes, using the side of his palm to rub against the seam of my shorts.

“I’ll take care of you.” The edge of his palm slipped to where I craved it most, the calloused base just catching my zipper. “But you have to promise me you won’t run.” He applied a little pressure, just enough to send a flash of heat through my belly. “I need more than just this from you.”

I tipped my head back, refusing to think of the consequences to my answer before it slipped out. His coercion was everything I’d been denying myself.

“Yes, okay, yes. Anything.”

He moved his hand away, and I reopened my eyes on a protesting gasp. “What are you…”

The driver’s side door opened and shut in a flash. Throat dry, I watched him run around the front of his SUV, bopping the hood of his Suburban just once. He popped up on my side, a wide grin on his face through my window. I shook my head, grinning as my door opened with a bang.

“In a hurry?” I teased, regardless of my own urges.

“Up.” He nodded at me with his chin.

“Up?” I squirmed in my seat, needing him to get back in here and finish what he’d started.

“I won’t do this in broad daylight with you. The last thing I want is for a few random kids to freak out if they hear a woman screaming from my truck.”

“Who says I’ll scream?” My lips twitched. “You must have some serious confidence in your skills if that’s the—”

He cut me off with his lips, his hand at the nape of my neck, his mouth overpowering mine. As I rose to my feet, our chests were crushed together. Gavin kissed me with the sort of strength that had me sinking into him and all he had to offer.

I curled my fingers in his long hair as the delicious sting of his beard rubbed my cheeks almost raw. With his tongue, he begged for entrance, pushing aside my lips with a feral growl.

My mind whirled with sensations, needs, wants. Hard and powerful, that’s how this man kissed me—as if he could coax the orgasm out of my body with his talented mouth alone. Before I could beg for what I needed again, his hands were on my ass, yanking me hard against his erection with a low groan. “You seem to forget about our night together.”

I smiled against his mouth. “I remember everything about that night.”

The way he’d felt inside me.

The way he’d pulled at my hair when he fucked me briefly from behind.

And the thing I remembered the most? How sore my throat had been in the morning when I woke. Because yes, I’d screamed really loud that night.

And it had everything to do with Gavin’s ability to fuck me.

“Hmm” was his only response. Again, the man of few words.

Giggling to myself, I latched my legs around his waist and kissed his cheek, then his ear, only to squeak when he pinched my ass.

“Where are your keys?” he asked as he walked me toward the front of my apartment, not letting me go. Not even pausing to catch his breath, other than when he spoke.

“They’re in my pocket.” I sighed, then leaned my forehead against his shoulder. One part of me was embarrassed because another person walked by, but the other part wished he’d just given me what I needed in his SUV.

“Well, fuck.”

I laughed again, but it fast turned into a moan as he slowly undid my legs from around his body and let me slide down the front of his hardness. My breasts ached from loss of contact with his chest when he nudged me away to dig in my pockets. Thankfully, it lasted only a few seconds.

He quickly unlocked the building’s door, only stopping to hike me up around his waist again. “I like you like this.”

I shuddered as fingers crept beneath the line of my shorts. “Like what?”

“Against me.” He nuzzled his nose against my cheek, then kissed me gently there. Intimate and sweet—nothing like the broody man I’d come to know.

As he carried me down the hall, the cold air from inside the complex brushed against the back of my neck. I shivered, tightening my arms around his neck.

Sensing my discomfort, he stroked a heavy hand up and down my spine. “Apartment number one-seventeen, right?”

I nodded, my body suddenly too heavy and lax for words. I was already sated in his arms, a comfort I hadn’t felt from a man—or even another human—in so long.

I counted fifteen steps before we arrived in front of my apartment door. He’d gone quiet again, as had I, neither of us saying a word when he unlocked my door and shoved it open. Five long steps after that, we were in my kitchen—Gavin placing me on the edge of the counter, merciless toward my poor, unsuspecting dishes.

Several plates fell to the floor with a crash, shattering over his shoes. “Shit.” He stumbled back a bit, eyes narrowed at the mess. He looked so much like a guilty, little boy, his eyes filled with fear and sadness as they shifted from the floor to my face. “I’m sorry.”

I touched his cheek, not giving a damn about a set of garage-sale dishes. “It’s fine.”

He shut his eyes, blew out a breath, then nodded, moving a step closer again. “I’ll buy you new ones.”

I shrugged, then reached for the button of my shorts. “Or you can pay me back in other ways.”

He grinned, leaning over me, only to reach the button first. “So demanding.”

I arched my back, allowing him the access he needed to get the shorts off. “Needy is what I am.”

His grin was smug as he dropped to his knees between my bare thighs. “As you should be.”

With gentle hands, he pressed his palms to my knees, then slipped them up and over my thighs. At the edge of my panties, he stopped, eyes flaring, breaths ragged at the same time. I looked down, frowning.

“Everything…okay?” I gulped, suddenly remembering the truth as I took in the small bulge just above my pubic bone. He couldn’t tell that I was pregnant, this I knew, but Jesus, I could. My belly wasn’t flat anymore. It was like I’d overeaten during a meal.

“Better than okay.” His eyes flashed up at me as he slowly slid the panties down my leg. Mischief lit the green, and I shuddered for a different reason all together. Then with a teasing grin still on his face, he whispered, “Now’s the time when you say ‘please,’ beautiful.”