Fiona
I DECIDED THE WINE IN my hand would be my one and only glass. After the emotional rehearsal topped by walking down the aisle not once, but five times with my hand resting on Marty’s arm thanks to the perfection issues of the wedding director, I was done.
We hadn’t been that close in a long time. Being forced into it over and over again had been a tease. A reminder of what once was. What could have been. Marty had been so tense as I held his arm he seemed annoyed by it. I wanted to burry my head in his chest making this an entirely embarrassing situation for me.
Laughter, joy, and all I had hoped for Shay surrounded me. We had eaten our meal. Everyone was drinking and some were dancing. I made small talk and pretended to feel as joyous as the others. But twice my eyes had made contact with Marty and it shook me. Each time my heart slammed into my chest as my stomach fluttered.
I was staring into my wine glass thinking about how much longer I had to stay down here and when I was supposed to speak. Marty hadn’t made a move to speak either, and the video of the couple hadn’t played yet.
“We are all about to watch a video of moments and photos that capture the journey this couple has taken together so far,” Marty said into the microphone and my head snapped up to see he was now sanding in the front of the ballroom. “Not that I need to see it. I watched it play out right there in front of me. Every mushy, entertaining, often ridiculous moment of it.”
He paused and his eyes met mine. I wondered if he was thinking what I was. That it had been us in the beginning. Back when Shay and Mack fought and hated each other. It had been our romance then. Our story. But it had ended with theirs.
“Many people fall in love. It happens every day. But it’s a rare thing when someone finds that person who makes them want to be better. Whose smile changes your worst moods. Who when they’re happy so are you. I know what that feels like. I’ve been lucky enough to experience it myself. Seeing my brother not only find that kind of love but watching him get to promise forever to the woman he loves is amazing. And I’m as happy for him as I am envious. This kind of love doesn’t die. It doesn’t fade. It grows with time. It changes. But nothing can end it.” He stood there still looking at me. I was unable to tear my gaze from his. I was frozen. He’d openly just told everyone here how he felt about me. How he would always feel about me.
While I continued to say nothing. Do nothing. I hadn’t fought for us. Not the way Shay had been ready to fight for Mack. Maybe it was me that didn’t deserve Marty. Not the other way around.
The video started behind him and he put the microphone down and walked toward me. I could hear the music in the background. The music Shay had chosen for the memories. I knew every photo she had decided to show in the video. But I couldn’t look at it. I couldn’t look away from him.
When he reached me he held out his hand and I didn’t hesitate. I placed mine in his. He gently folded his larger hand over mine and led me back through the entrance and into the garden we’d been in earlier. It was empty now. Quiet.
I could wait for him to say something, but he already had. I hadn’t said anything and I’d refused to listen.
“I was scared. Of being hurt. Of loving too much. Loving the most. Of being left. I was scared of my heart being broken. Of being alone. Of how it would feel to lose the one person I had come to love more than any other. And that fear . . . it won. And I found that all those things I was scared of I had brought upon myself because I wasn’t brave enough to trust. I caused all my fears to come true.” I stopped. I needed to say more but my throat was thick with emotion.
“You’re wrong. At least about two things. You didn’t love the most. That fear you never made a reality. And Fiona, you left me. I didn’t leave you. I was never that strong. Even then I wanted to see you. Even when I couldn’t have you.”
The tears came again. I seemed to be full of them today. “I ruined it. Us. What could have been. I destroyed it all.”
Marty took a step closer to me. “Do you love me?”
“Yes.”
He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. When he opened them again, his gaze was warm. I could feel the heat from his gaze inside my chest. “Then nothing is ruined. It was delayed. But it’s not destroyed. You are my one. You always will be.”
“How can you just forget it all? I didn’t trust you. There is damage there, Marty. We can’t act like there isn’t.”
He slipped a hand around my waist and pulled me against him. “Without me telling you what happened with Mary Grace and Chantel, you’re willing to trust me?”
I nodded. I knew there was a story I had never heard, but even without him telling me I also knew I trusted him. His love had held on this long. How could I doubt him?
“Do you need an explanation to be us again? To spend forever with me?”
I didn’t even have to think it through. I knew the answer. “No. I don’t.”
He rested his forehead on mine. “Trust heals damage and you trust me. You trust my love. You weren’t ready before. You are now.”
“You loved me when I was broken,” I whispered.
“You weren’t broken. You were hurt too many times. But you’ve always been perfect. My perfect.”