Fourteen

Lloyd drank in the sight of the Harkner homestead as they came over the rise. Below, the Harkners’ three homes were nestled against the foothills of the Rocky Mountains range. There should be more snow high in those mountains, but it had been a mild winter for Colorado and not enough rain this spring. Now they were headed for July, normally dry anyway.

He couldn’t worry about it today. It was just good to be home, especially good that his father was healing fast. The whole family had been through so much hell, and strangely, in spite of most of the trouble stemming from Jake Harkner’s past, Jake remained the hub around which the family circled. It was as though all the spokes that emanated from that hub would fall to pieces without that central strength. Jake would deny that, a man who had never accepted his worth. You’re just like your father, people often said to Lloyd. Some men might not take that as a compliment, considering. But Lloyd was proud.

He lit a cigarette and waited while everyone greeted Jake and fussed over him. Lloyd shook his head, remembering there was a time when he’d thought he hated the man—so many years…so many memories. Jake Harkner had a surprising capacity to love, mostly because he’d never known the meaning of the word as a boy growing up with Satan for a father. Lloyd supposed that was why Jake had been determined to be the best father a kid could ask for. It was his way of living over his boyhood in the way he would have liked it to be. Everything they’d been through only made the whole family stronger, knitted together in a way that they would never be pulled apart.

That’s why it had hurt so much to see Randy withering away. These last few months, he and Evie had feared they were watching their parents drift apart, something they never thought could happen, but there was hope in the fact that his mother actually seemed a little stronger on their trip home. Maybe it was just because she felt safer here, in familiar surroundings. Over the last couple of days he’d noticed more joy in her eyes, and she’d fussed over Jake all the way home, giving him orders for every move he made so he wouldn’t reinjure himself. They’d exchanged a few biting, teasing remarks, a rather comical exchange of barbs—something he hadn’t see them do in a long time.

Something had happened, but he wasn’t going to ask Jake about it. His father was a man who talked about something only when he wanted to. Better to just take comfort in what he’d observed and be glad that maybe—just maybe—his parents were finding their way back to each other. It just takes a lot of time. His sister had told him that once, and who knew better about things like that than Evie?

He kicked Strawberry into motion, riding at a faster gait to catch up with the entire procession of family and ranch hands as they made their way down the hill, the three boys peppering Jake and Randy with questions, Little Jake riding in circles around the buggy. Chickens squawked, and horses in an outer corral whinnied, as though even the animals were glad to see Jake return.

“You really okay, Grampa?” Little Jake asked when they finally reached the house. The boy suddenly looked ready to cry.

“I’m all right, Little Jake. Everybody come inside the house, and we’ll have the girls cook up a good meal for all of us. We’ll talk about everything then.”

“And no jumping all over Jake. He’s not healed yet,” Randy told them with an air of authority. Lloyd noticed his father move an arm around her when he climbed out of the buggy. Yes, something had certainly changed.

“Mommy! Mommy!” Tricia shouted as Katie ran down the steps to sweep her daughter into her arms and hug her tight. Lloyd thought it was a beautiful sight. Katie Donavan had come into his life when he needed her most. She was beautiful and loving, had helped him get over his first wife’s death, and was a good mother to his and Beth’s son Stephen. She’d given him Tricia and now another son, Donavan Patrick.

How amazing was it that the infamous Jake Harkner was responsible for this huge, loving family? And now he and Lloyd ran this ranch together, a glorious eighty-thousand acres. This spring hadn’t boded well for rain, but Lloyd had planned ahead and was saving grass for emergency feed in a vast valley called Evie’s Garden. Horse Creek ran through there and had never dried up, even when there had been years with little rain. Mountain snows fed it, but this year that could be a problem.

There followed two hours of sheer bedlam. The ranch hands surrounded Lloyd and Jake outside with questions about the fracas and reports on roundup and branding, while the women cooked inside the main house. Nothing felt better than the whole family being together, which was why Jake had insisted on keeping a big house with lots of bedrooms. Stephen and Little Tricia slept there practically as much as they slept at home. All the kids loved Randy’s cooking and being around Jake, whom they considered the toughest, most famous man on the face of the earth. Lloyd had to shake his head over that one.

Once in the house, Jake insisted on holding the two babies for a while, little Donavan and Evie’s new baby girl, Esther Miranda. They let Tricia and her cousin, Sadie Mae, sit on his lap, while Randy constantly reminded the girls not to hug their grandfather too tightly or crawl all over him the way they usually did. Sadie Mae pulled his shirt up unexpectedly to see where Grampa had been shot, and then she started crying.

The women were all over her tears, and Lloyd wondered if there would ever be any semblance of order in the growing mob of brothers and sisters and cousins the family had become.

One thing that gave him the most joy was noticing how his parents kept glancing at each other. Things were definitely better, and Lloyd suspected they’d rather have some time alone, something they hadn’t had since they left for Boulder in the first place. Randy walked to where Jake sat in his favorite big chair near the fireplace and put out her hands. “Come to the table, Jake.”

Jake grasped her hands, and she helped him up, a rather comical sight with him so big and his mother so small. He watched them kiss, and his mother put an arm around Jake as he walked to the table.

They all took their seats, and Jake asked Evie to say grace. Evie looked at him in surprise. “Did I just hear my father ask me to pray?” she asked teasingly.

“Yes, you did.”

“You never ask me to pray.”

“First time for everything, baby girl. Your prayers are strong. Mine don’t hold water at all, so just say grace and don’t ask questions.”

Lloyd grinned. Typical Jake Harkner comment. Jake was feeling better, and it wasn’t just his side that was healing.

“And include a thank you that your mother is eating better and smiling more.”

“Jake, she doesn’t have to do that,” Randy protested.

Lloyd studied his mother closely. Was she actually blushing a little? He glanced at Evie, who just shrugged before offering the prayer. The whole family dived in then, and Randy filled her plate and ate as though truly hungry. Lloyd wondered if maybe the shooting had been good for his mother. It had forced her to be stronger.

As soon as they finished eating, the boys continued to insist Jake tell them the story about the bank robbery all over again. Little Jake was the most excited, using his fingers to mimic handguns as he yelled “Bang! Bang! Bang!” when Teresa retold what it was like to feel Jake’s bullets whizzing over her head.

Lloyd stepped outside to have a cigarette, and Evie followed him out. “Lloyd, did you see? Mother seems better.”

Lloyd drew on the cigarette and leaned against the porch railing. “Yeah, she does. I don’t know for sure what happened, mind you. She was still bad when we got to Boulder, and no better after that damn shoot-out—at least from what I could tell when we got there. She looked really bad. Pa was still concerned, and I could see him sliding backward, you know? He was about to do something crazy, I think, as if that shoot-out wasn’t bad enough. It’s probably a good thing he was injured. It kept him from… I don’t know. Something he probably would have regretted. You know how he is. He told me that before the shoot-out he got into it with Brady Fillmore over that stolen steer, but there was more to it than that. I think maybe Fillmore said something about Mom. It doesn’t take much of that kind of talk to set Pa off.”

“We all know how ornery he can be.”

Lloyd studied his sister, never quite able to stop worrying about her since her ordeal at Dune Hollow, even though it was almost five years ago. “How are you?”

“I’m okay. It just scares me to think of something happening to Daddy. I’m so relieved he seems to be recovering.” She sat down in a wicker chair. “Should I ask him about Mother?”

“Absolutely not. It’s something private, or Pa would have told me. Just leave them alone. God knows they’ve worked their way through enough other bad times that could have pulled them apart. If they can rise above this one and find each other again, there isn’t much else that could come between them. And don’t ask Mom. God knows, one wrong word might embarrass her or send her back to silence. She’s eating and talking, so let it be.”

“I know how hard something like that is, for the man and the woman. I couldn’t have survived without Brian’s love. He’s such a patient, caring man.”

Lloyd hated thinking about it. He’d shot a man in the back the day Evie was rescued, and he damn well deserved it for running from the law. Thank God he and Jake had been the law back in those days. They’d had a right to go after those bastards and blow them away. “Your husband is a real blessing,” he said aloud. “If you’d married a man who abused you or didn’t give you the proper love and attention, I’d have beat the shit out of him, but then I’d have to wait for Pa to do it first.”

Evie smiled shyly. “Pity the young men who come calling on Tricia or Sadie Mae.”

Lloyd kept the cigarette between his lips. “I don’t even want to think about that.”

Evie rose, folding her arms. “Well, speaking of giving a woman the proper love and attention, dear brother, I should tell you that you need to work on your own husbandry.”

Lloyd frowned, taking the cigarette from his lips. “What are you talking about?”

“Katie is hiding it, but she’s been depressed about gaining weight. She thinks it bothers you.”

Lloyd tossed the cigarette. “That’s ridiculous! I don’t care about things like that. Hell, she just had a baby five months ago, a healthy new son. I couldn’t be happier about that. And Katie is beautiful no matter what. Her mother is a stout woman too, but all I ever saw was a lovely woman who had an incredibly big heart and generous nature.”

Evie smiled slyly. “Honestly, Lloyd, sometimes a man just needs to be hit over the head to see straight. You do realize how handsome you are, don’t you? I mean, you see yourself in the mirror when you shave.”

Lloyd let out a little gasp of exasperation. “Jesus, Evie, I don’t think about things like that. Who the hell cares?”

“Katie cares. And at that cookout a month ago at the Holmeses’, you talked often with little Lori Holmes. She’s sixteen and a beautiful girl, and anyone can tell she’s infatuated with you.”

“For crying out loud, she’s close to half my age! I was just being friendly.”

“And being the block-headed man you can be sometimes, you have no idea how it feels to a woman who is worn out from running after kids and from constantly nursing and feeling hard on herself to see her handsome husband being friendly with a little girl gone all starry-eyed. It hurt her, Lloyd. She finally told me just a couple of days ago. We had a long talk, and I told her I think I know you well enough that it meant nothing to you, but she needs to hear it from you, not me.”

Lloyd grasped his long hair and pulled it behind his back. “That really bothered her?”

Evie sighed in exasperation. “Honestly, men can be so dense! Lloyd, sometimes women get depressed after having a baby, and I know it’s been almost six months, but with all of you men being so busy this spring rebuilding the barn that burned, and then roundup and branding, Katie says you haven’t paid her a whole lot of attention. Then came the cookout and that pretty young girl. Put it all together, big brother. Your wife needs some extra attention the next couple of weeks. And if I were you, I’d bring back something really nice for her when you come home from the Denver cattle drive. She needs to know you still fancy her.”

“Of course I’m attracted to her! But I also love her enough to realize how hard it would be on her if she got pregnant again. I’ve been deliberately staying away from her, because that’s the last thing she needs right now.”

“Then you need to explain that to her. Listen to me, Lloyd. This is a woman who understands, so take my advice. And let her make the decision about more babies. If you stay away from each other because she wants it, she’ll understand. But this way, she just thinks you’ve got your eye on someone younger and prettier.”

“Evie, I had my share of women before I married Beth. When I lost her, Katie filled a void I never thought could be filled. I couldn’t love her more. As far as someone younger and prettier, hell, look at Katie. Women don’t get much prettier than her…present company excluded, of course.”

Evie waved him off. “Don’t take it for granted Katie understands that. Women have to hear from their husband’s lips how pretty they are. And quit worrying about getting her pregnant. All children are a wonderful gift, and if God means for you to have more, you’ll have more. Take my advice and give her some extra attention. I have no doubt you have plenty of charm in that department. I can take Tricia and Stephen with us tonight if you want. Tricia likes to play with Sadie Mae anyway, and it might help Tricia forget about that awful gunfight. It must have been terrifying for her.”

Lloyd sighed with frustration. “I’ll see what I can do. It’s pretty bad when your own sister has to tell you how to handle your wife. I can’t believe I didn’t see this.”

“You’ve been so busy, Lloyd, and I know you’ve been worried about Mother.” She walked up to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. “Come back inside and have some pie. We shouldn’t stay out here too long, or Katie will think I’m telling you all this, which I promised her I wouldn’t.”

Evie walked back inside, and Lloyd followed. He sat down and watched his wife cut up pies for everyone. She glanced at Lloyd, and it was the first time he’d realized something was wrong, other than the too-quick kiss they’d shared when he first arrived. How could he not have seen it? He smiled at her, deciding he was going to take her out of here sooner than later. He’d damn well make sure she knew how much he loved her.