We both had a concussion and were admitted for the night. Thankfully, the staff here knew us well enough they didn’t even bother putting us in separate rooms. There were two beds in the one they put us in, but only one was going to be used.
Eddie had stitches in his head behind his ear. They had to shave off a patch of his dark curls to stitch the gash the witch had put there. The fact he was able to get up off the floor, with a split head and a concussion, steal a boat, and find in me in the center of the lake was a marvel to the police and the hospital staff.
He saved my life… I’d lost count how many times it was now. After tonight, there were more questions than answers, but I knew something that would never change. I would always be able to count on Eddie. And maybe the circumstances in which we met and fell in love were totally odd and a little unbelievable, but the love was real.
I didn’t have any stitches, but I had a knot on my head, various cuts and bruises, and my hand in a cast. One of the bones cracked when the widow crushed my hand with the oar.
The second we arrived at the hospital, everything was a blur. The doctors and nurses bustled around, took us both for CT scans, and made it a priority to get us warm. By the time we were moved into the private room, I was so tired I was dizzy. Or maybe that was just the head injury. Either way, I wanted to sleep.
We weren’t allowed of course. So instead, I lay in the bed with Eddie, beneath itchy hospital blankets, and relived the horrors that just occurred over and over again.
We hadn’t talked about it yet; there hadn’t been any time, and I felt so raw I wasn’t sure I was ready. Or if I ever would be.
“You remembered more, didn’t you?” Eddie murmured, holding me tight against his chest.
I nodded, tears instantly flooding my eyes. “Something she said triggered it,” I whispered. “It was horrible,” I rasped, hugging him more fiercely.
“I can’t believe old Widow West was behind this all these years,” he said, his voice flat and lifeless. “All this time… you were right here.”
“It wasn’t just her.” I began, pulling back to look into his face. There was a bruise on the side of his head where I figured she’d hit him the second time. On impulse, I leaned up, brushing my lips over the area.
He made a soft sound, covering my lips with his. I let myself sink right into his warmth and the softness of his kiss.
The door opened. Eddie drew back first, glancing up to see who was coming in. I was still watching him, his full lips, strong jaw…
“We have a lot of questions,” a man said, drawing my attention away. Glancing around, I saw several police officers, Dr. Beck, and Dr. Kline.
“Do we really need to do this now?” Eddie asked, surly. “She’s been through enough.”
“I’m afraid so,” the officer said, stepping forward. “We need all the information you can recall. The sooner the better.”
I sat up, still keeping my body against Eddie’s, and looked at the people in the room. “I remembered my name,” I announced. “It’s Sadie. I’m the girl who went missing eleven years ago. I didn’t drown. I was kidnapped.”
There were low gasps in the room, the ruffling of papers, and a concerned look on Dr. Kline’s face.
“Are you absolutely certain about this?” the officer asked.
I frowned. “Not absolutely, but it all makes sense.”
“And it was Mrs. West who kidnapped you all those years ago, and she’s been holding you hostage against your will ever since?” He went on.
“Yes,” I said. Then I faltered. “Well, I can’t remember.”
“Which is it, miss?” the officer asked, his pen pausing over the pad of paper.
“Watch your tone,” Eddie growled from beside me. “She’s been through enough.”
I patted his leg. “It’s fine,” I murmured over my shoulder.
“Like hell it is,” he muttered back.
“Please continue.” Another officer urged.
I nodded and went back to what I was saying. “Earlier tonight, Eddie and I were in bed sleeping when there was a loud knock at the door.”
“You and Eddie are in a relationship?” The officer cut in.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, Doug! You know we are!” Eddie snapped.
I winced. “He hit his head. They had to shave his hair. He’s had a bad night.”
A few people in the room snickered. Eddie growled.
“Anyway…” I went on before anyone else could make him angrier. “Eddie answered the door, and it was Mrs. West. She claimed she needed help, that she’d been trying for hours to get back out to her island.”
“We have witnesses that she was in town today at the general store.”
Eddie nodded.
“She came inside, and Eddie offered to help her. We left the room for a minute, and when we came back, she attacked us.”
“Knocked me out and kidnapped Am,” Eddie corroborated.
I nodded. “She knocked me out, too. Next thing I knew, I was on her not-damaged boat in the middle of the lake.”
“Where was she taking you?” the officer asked.
“She said back to where I belong. She hates me.” My voice fell as I remembered the venom that spewed from her eyes. “She blames me for the injuries on her body and says someone forced her to come and get me. She said he wanted me back.”
The room fell silent as my words sank in. The entire situation was sick and twisted. “She was the one who attacked me at the hospital. She’s been watching me.”
“So you’re saying the people who kidnapped you and held you prisoner for eleven years wanted you back?”
I nodded.
“Why?”
“I don’t know,” I said. “I don’t remember.”
The officer shifted, glancing up at me. “What do you remember?”
I told them about the first memory I had when I fell in the shower, how I was certain I’d been physically assaulted and abused. I talked about my hair and what I’d done to it, and then finally, I told them about the night I’d somehow gotten away and ran into the hunter’s stand.
My voice trembled, my body shook, and horror made me want to vomit.
“And…” I said, stopping to take a deep breath, groping behind me for Eddie’s hand.
“We can be done,” he whispered, rubbing my back. “I’ll tell them to go.”
“No,” I said, shaking my head. “It’s been nearly twelve years of mystery. I don’t know much, but I can at least tell what I do.”
I felt the attention of every single person in the room. Everyone hung onto every horrendous word. Taking a deep, shuddering breath, I said it out loud. “That night Eddie found me, no one tried to drown me. I jumped off that platform. I tried to kill myself.”
Fat tears slid over my cheeks, and my shoulders shook as I began to cry. Eddie wrapped himself around me from behind, whispering in my ear it was going to be okay.
I felt everyone’s eyes avert, an uncomfortable wave going through the room. Everyone pitied me in that moment; no one knew what to say.
After a moment, the officer Eddie called Doug cleared his throat. “So you are claiming to be Sadie Gordon, the girl who went missing at the age of fourteen, over eleven years ago. You were kidnapped by Mrs. West, the widow of Rumor Island, and she held you hostage all those years there on her island. You were regularly abused, raped, and ultimately, in an attempt to get free, you tried to commit suicide. After being found here onshore by Mr. Donovan, you were in a coma for over two months, woke with amnesia, and have since been stalked by the widow until tonight. You were both attacked, and you were kidnapped again.”
It was unreal. If I hadn’t lived it, I wouldn’t even believe it myself.
“Yes,” I said. Then I faltered. “But I don’t know if she’s the one who kidnapped me all those years ago. I know she’s involved, but there is a man, someone she seems afraid of… but oddly loyal to.”
“You’re sure you were held on Rumor Island?” The officer pressed.
I nodded. Then realized I couldn’t be sure. I couldn’t be sure about anything. “I can’t be sure,” I said miserably. My eyes found Dr. Kline, who had been listening intently to this entire conversation. “You said my memories could be distorted, but these felt so real. Is it possible everything that’s come back to me is true?”
“It’s very possible. But as a professional, I can’t rule out the fact that not everything you remember should be taken as absolute. There are still large gaps in your memory, still a lot of information unknown.”
“So everything we know is basically speculation,” an officer said unhappily.
“Not everything,” Eddie said. “That witch attacked us, tried to kidnap her tonight. That alone proves a lot of the other stuff.”
“It’s definitely a lead.” The officer agreed pragmatically.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Eddie said. “Have you even questioned the widow?”
I perked up. I’d forgotten about her. I gasped. “Where is she?”
Doug was quick to tell me, “She’s been admitted as well, but not to worry. We have an officer posted at her door.”
Dr. Beck stepped forward. “She’s in rough shape as well. It’s still very early yet, but I can already say she’s suffered a lot of abuse.”
“But you questioned her, right?” I worried. “She told you who I was? She told you I’m Sadie.”
Dr. Beck frowned. “I’m afraid not.”
“What?” I gasped, trying to scramble off the bed. Eddie clutched me, trying to keep me from leaping forward. “Let me go!” I demanded.
He didn’t; instead, his arms wrapped a little tighter. “Calm down, Am. You have a concussion. Don’t make it worse.”
“She needs to tell everyone!” I wailed. “She’s known all this time!”
Dr. Beck came forward, as did Dr. Kline. “I think that’s enough for this evening,” he said.
The officer closed his notebook, a concerned look on his features.
“No! Wait!” I exclaimed and stopped trying to struggle against Eddie. “I’m sorry. I’m fine. This is all just very frustrating.”
“Memory loss can be, especially when you’re remembering things and trying to make sense of what is real and what’s a distortion,” Dr. Kline said in her schmucky head-shrinker voice.
I wanted to poke her in the eye. How dare she be so calm and nonchalant? Hell, she was acting as if half the stuff I was saying wasn’t even real.
I knew real!
“You don’t think I’m Sadie?” I said, my voice low.
Everyone glanced at the head shrink. “I think it’s very likely you are. Frankly, I’m more concerned with you and your mental health.”
What a crock.
“Just ask her,” I pleaded with the police. “Just go in her room and ask.”
They all shifted uncomfortably.
“What aren’t you saying?” Eddie demanded.
Dr. Beck sighed. “Mrs. West is currently in a catatonic state. She is unresponsive to stimuli, her body is unmoving and rigid, and she is not currently able to speak.”
I fell back against Eddie, disappointment swelling within me. “What?” I cried. “Why?”
“I think it has a lot to do with what has happened. As I said, she shows signs of long-term abuse, and after hearing about the events of this evening, I’m prepared to say this has been brought on by a psychological illness.”
“So she’s insane.” Eddie deadpanned. “Shocker.”
“We won’t know more until she begins to respond,” Dr. Kline put in.
“But I need to know,” I said, desperation clinging to my words. “I need to know who I am. What they did to me all those years ago.”
“And you will, remember.” Dr. Kline reminded me. “But not all at once. And that’s okay.”
“I don’t want to remember.” My voice scraped out of my throat. “I don’t want to re-feel all those horrible things done to me. What I do remember is more than enough. I don’t want to be changed forever—damaged—over the past. I just want to live in the present, with a clean slate.”
Everyone stared at me; no one quite knew what to say.
“All I want is for her to admit that I’m Sadie, for her to tell everyone what they did. I want to know… but I don’t want to remember.”
“It doesn’t matter if you’re Sadie, Am,” Eddie said, brushing my hair over my shoulder and kissing the side of my ear. “I love you no matter what.”
My chest squeezed. Turning, my lips brushed his cheek. “I know, and I love you, too.”
Facing everyone else, I said, “But I need to know. For me.” For Sadie, the girl whose entire life was ripped away.
“As soon as we can, we’ll question her.” Officer Doug assured me.
“How long?” I asked, glancing at Dr. Beck.
He shook his head. “There is really just no telling. Could be hours. Could be days.”
“Weeks?” I pressed, feeling dread collecting inside me.
“In some cases.” He hedged.
More tears fell. I shoved them away and sat up. “I want to see her.”
“No, that’s not a good idea,” Dr. Kline said.
“Why?” I asked. “It’s not like she can do anything more than what’s already been done.”
“She really shouldn’t have any visitors,” Dr. Beck said.
I laughed. “Are you kidding me? She tortured me, kidnapped me, stole eleven years of my life! Eddie has stitches in his head, and I know nothing about who I used to be! She owes me!”
“Five minutes.” Dr. Beck said.
“The officer will remain at the door,” Doug added. “I think that’s all for tonight.” He continued. “If you think of anything else, call me immediately. Otherwise, we’ll be in touch.”
The officers left the room, leaving behind both doctors. “Are you sure you want to do this?” Dr. Kline said. “Facing someone who’s hurt you so much isn’t easy.”
“I’m sure.” I said, slipping out of the bed.
She nodded. “I’ll stay for a while. If you want to talk after, I’ll be here.”
“Thank you,” I said, feeling some of the frustration I held against her soften.
“I’ll be just outside,” Dr. Beck said. “I’ll take you to her room.”
When both doctors were gone, I turned and looked at Eddie. He was standing just behind me, his azure irises bouncing between mine.
“So now you know,” I told him, my stomach knotting.
His forehead wrinkled. “Know what?”
“That I tried to kill myself.” I glanced down at the floor, feeling oddly ashamed, even though I remembered how I felt in that moment. How ready I’d been to die. I whispered, “Does that change how you feel about me?”
Eddie was silent for long moments, longer than I expected.
Nervously, I found the courage to lift my chin, meet his eyes. “Does it?” I echoed.
He swallowed thickly, nodding once. “Yes.”