Chapter 7
Kathryn
“Hi,” I said, barely able to hear my own voice above the music and the noise of the crowd. I’d expected the volume but not so much the density of the crowd. I was glad I wasn’t claustrophobic, or I would have left almost as soon as I arrived. It didn’t help that Crystal found the eye candy so distracting she couldn’t stay with me. My anxiety had hit the roof, and I’d nearly given up on finding Alexander. I didn’t need to be here anyway, but with Crystal riding me and my curiosity about to explode, I’d caved and let my roommate drag me out of the apartment.
He grinned back, and I could barely look at him, that handsome face too much for me. I felt the shiver before it crawled up my spine, and the body heat building in the club increased with as the warmth of my attraction to him bathed me.
“You came,’ he said.
He didn’t make a move to touch me, didn’t step closer. I had stopped three feet in front of him, which probably created the largest gap between people in the entire club. In fact, three people squeezed between us as I stood there, and I had to move closer to talk to him. “You look good. Different.”
With his hair gelled back and sticking up in fashionable spikes, his green dress shirt and brown suede jacket rolled up at the sleeves, and his khakis topping off a pair of contemporary pointed leather loafers, he presented a persona that blended with the club goers here and denounced any association with the bartender I’d met at the Purple Dragon.
“Do you have multiple personalities?” I kidded, trying to draw him out. He seemed withdrawn, and it bothered me.
“No, just a chameleon when I need to be,” he answered casually, his eyes no longer on me. He scanned the action behind me, and I wondered if he acted as a bouncer and saw a situation. I looked over my shoulder and followed his gaze but saw nothing that raised any alarms.
I had no right to expect him to pay special attention to me. He probably invited women here all the time to drum up business. Men came to look for women, and women came looking for the good time Alexander promised. He probably got a bonus when they made a certain amount of money on a given night.
Still, I had only come because he issued the invitation to us, and I wanted at least a little more recognition for my effort, since it had gone against my better judgment. “So, as the best bartender I know, which bar should I hit to get the best this place has to offer?” It provided easy, engaging conversation I hoped he couldn’t refuse.
His eyes leveled on me again, and he seemed a bit more interested in my presence. The smile stuck and he gestured with his head toward a bar behind him, at the back of the club. “I’ll mix you up something delicious on the house.”
He didn’t take my hand, and I had to stay on his heels, doggedly pursuing him through the shoulder to shoulder crowd. I didn’t like it, and I started to tell him so, but as I approached the bar and squeezed between people already vying for drinks, he motioned for them to back up. “We’ll be right with you!” he hollered at them.
VIP treatment, I supposed, was a good sign. He leaned on the bar in front of me and asked, “Sweet or tart?”
I considered for a moment and replied, “Tart.” He nodded and went to work, and in the end, two Caribbean-blue drinks appeared. He cleared two stools for us and took a seat, motioning for me to take the other. This was more like it – I knew he had a job to do, though what exactly it entailed escaped my understanding. The fact that he would take the time to sit with me over a drink put a positive spin on the night.
“You look amazing,” he told me, motioning to my little black dress and matching pumps. I wore dresses a lot, but this was one I saved for the rare occasion when I really wanted to dress up.
I preened. “Thank you. You clean up pretty well yourself.”
He gave me a rueful grin of acknowledgement, and I toyed with my glass, turning it round and round on the counter without drinking. “So, what exactly is it you do here?”
He shrugged. “A little of everything. Greet people, work the bar, watch the door, and break up disturbances. I’m versatile.”
His answer was vague, and I narrowed my eyes at him. Maybe if I opened up to him, I could learn a little more. “The last time I hit a club this popular was in college. I went to LSU in New Orleans, and a few friends of mine took me to the Chris Owens Club. It was fun, but we wanted something a little busier, and we decided to go to the Dungeon after hours. It wasn’t this bright and glamorous, but it was definitely packed, and I got a little too drunk on the three-for-one mixed drinks. I don’t remember much after that, but I didn’t wake up until around four in the afternoon the next day.”
His eyes were on me—it was like he couldn’t stand to look past me anymore. This was better. I felt warm under his appreciative glance, almost like my little black dress was transparent and he could see every part of me…and he liked what he saw.
Instead of feeling vulnerable, I felt powerful.
Now that I had him, I asked him another question. “What made you decide to work at a club like this?”
He hesitated with a scowl, and I waited, hoping I hadn’t hit a sore spot.
He took a sip of his drink. “I grew up in San Antonio, and there wasn’t a lot of variety in the nightlife. You had a lot of Latino and Salsa clubs, and you had the regular dance clubs. When I got to Houston, they didn’t have much at all, and I had to search for a place to let loose. I came here and saw an opportunity, so I took it.”
I nodded with the story, hoping for more, but his eyes darted around before coming back to me.
“What do you think of it?” he asked.
I looked around at the crazy steampunk theme, the brilliant neon and fluorescence of the place. “It definitely energizes you to walk through the door. It’s not a place for people with social issues,” I joked, pointing toward the close quarters and the people smashed together. “It’s not the type of place I usually go anymore. I’ve settled down a lot since college, but I like this place—it’s fun and exciting.”
He didn’t say anything, and the conversation was feeling like too much work. He played with his cuffs and cleared his throat before he took a drink from his glass, and I picked up mine, tasting it. Delicious, of course, and I moaned as the tartness sparked on my tongue, the warmth of the liquor I could barely taste sliding down my throat and into my chest.
“What do you call this one?” I asked.
“Electric Blueberry.”
I waited for him to elaborate, to keep the conversation going, but he kept looking elsewhere like he was nervous. What was going on with him? Last night and the night before, he’d been so welcoming, and tonight, he seemed distracted. I got that this club was busier and the energy was more likely to produce a problem than the atmosphere at the Purple Dragon, but this was ridiculous. He ran hot and cold, and I needed to find the heat if I wanted to find my answers.
“It’s fabulous,” I told him, sipping a little more and hoping it didn’t turn my teeth blue. Maybe if I could get him interested in a topic he felt passionate about, I could turn on his charm. “Where did you go to school?”
But that seemed like the wrong thing to bring up, because that scowl returned, deeper this time. “Rice University. It’s what brought me to Houston to start with. I have a bachelor’s degree in business management.”
“That’s useful,” I said. “What made you choose a business major?”
Alexander shook his head. “I just wanted to have a degree so I had my options open. My mother’s first job was as a crowd tamer at the Alamo, and both my parents made their own way from nothing up to middle class. I wasn’t interested in starting at the bottom, so I went to school.”
“Maybe your mother’s past influenced you a little in deciding to start working in a social environment like this,” I suggested.
“Maybe,” he said, sounded infinitely disinterested.
“I know you don’t owe me anything, but it feels weird that you invited me here and you don’t want to talk. I guess I have the answers I came for.” I knew I sounded petty and irritated, but I couldn’t get a handle on his moods. I still felt the attraction between us, even though he was giving me a distant vibe, but I couldn’t handle the distance.
The muscle in his jaw twitched, and he gave me a sheepish look. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be so quiet. It’s a crazy night, and I have to watch what’s going on. What would you like to know?”
I hesitated, and he spread his arms as if welcoming an onslaught. “Come on, grill me. I’ll see if I can satisfy your curiosity.”
I read the mischief in his gaze and felt better. Adjusting in my seat and taking a drink to buy myself some time, I finally said, “I don’t even know your last name.”
“Ah, nobody does,” he laughed. “I tend to be Alexander, the Guy at the Club. What else?”
I tried something else. “What do your parents do for a living?”
“They were both real estate agents. My mom still is, but my dad passed away awhile ago.”
“I’m sorry about your dad,” I said simply, not wanting to press for details about a sensitive topic.
“Thanks,” he said quietly. “What about your parents?”
Damn, he was already turning the conversation back to me. “My mother’s an elementary school teacher in a small, poor town in Louisiana. My dad’s a salesman in the same town, retail electronics and stuff. I always asked them if they had bigger dreams, but they said no. They were happy where they were, doing what they could to get by and help others at the same time.”
“My parents wanted to put me through college and see me succeed in life. I don’t think they really enjoyed their work,” he said quietly. “My mom is usually stressed out with it, now.”
There was something, I supposed. Maybe he didn’t feel the need to work for personal satisfaction, only to provide a future for himself and whatever family he had.
I offered, “Well, growing up with nothing helped me learn to manage with very little. I don’t go out and spend lavish amounts of money on things like partying, and I don’t need the best of everything to live comfortably. I’m actually pretty low maintenance. I’m sure you don’t come across that here very often.”
I was digging for his interest, trying to see if he actually had any interest in me. I probably sounded brash and needy. But I didn’t see any point in working this hard at conversation otherwise.
Instead of answering my question, he said, “You sound like you strive to be independent, in case someone ever leaves you hanging. Someone’s hurt you pretty bad, right?”
I blushed. I could walk away now and never discuss my past, but again, I thought if I shared my experience, he might do the same.
“I was engaged. We were together a long time, and I discovered six weeks before the wedding that he’d been cheating on me throughout most of our relationship.” That was short, sweet, and to the point, and I held it together, sounding maybe spiteful but not desolate. It was an improvement for me when it came to talking about Jarrett.
I couldn’t read the expression he wore, and I stared at him, bewildered. He had so many faces, and they all intrigued me. It made me wonder what sort of expression he wore in the height of pleasure.
I shoved that thought aside and took a long drink to cool off.
Finally, he said, “Did you love him?”
I blinked. The question wasn’t even close to the reaction I expected from him. But I answered honestly. “I thought so. But how do I really know? I mean, isn’t love a mutual feeling, something both parties have to feel for it to be real? And if he loved me, how could he go behind my back like that?”
I hadn’t shared that with anyone before, and I didn’t quite understand what made me spill it now.
I decided to blame the Electric Blueberry.
“Love is for dreamers,” he said.
My jaw went slack. I couldn’t believe he’d just discounted the possibility that I’d truly loved Jarrett without even knowing the person I was on a daily basis.
He continued, “You can love your family and your friends. I believe in platonic love. But when it comes to falling in love with someone, it’s an idea that’s been created by society to force people to settle down with a spouse. And business and commerce latched on and used that idea to create an entire industry based on love. Think about how much people spend on gifts and dinners and travel and even dating sites these days. It’s a commercial emotion, not a real one.”
Something about his adamant denial made me sad. I asked quietly, “Have you ever been in love?”
“No.” He practically spat the single word, and I flinched at the harsh inflection. But he smiled and flushed slightly. “I’m sorry. I just have very strong opinions about some things.”
I didn’t speak, still trying to process his explanation. If he didn’t believe in love, he certainly had no interest in a relationship of any kind.
But he backtracked a little. “That doesn’t mean I don’t believe two people can connect, form a bond stronger than a friendship. I see it all the time. My parents fought through a lot of hardships together, and because of the bond they forged a long time ago and always kept strong, they survived a lot of trials that would have shaken other people enough to break them apart.”
I needed to lighten the mood, and fast. With a bit of a teasing lilt, I asked, “So maybe you don’t believe in true love, but you do believe in soul mates?”
He laughed out loud. “Maybe. Who knows?”
We were back to short answers, and I had the feeling he wouldn’t open up the same way again. And with his refusal to consider the possibility of falling in love, I had better things to do with my time. I shouldn’t even have come, and I twisted in my seat, looking for Crystal. I found her at the other end of the bar, surrounded by about five men, doing shots with them. She fit in here, her printed t-shirt fitting her like a short dress over her blue jean style leggings. She’d played up her hair into a wild mess of curls around her face, and I knew the only reason she could even reach the bar was because she wore a pair of pink strappy heels that gave her nearly six extra inches. The shoes would have put me on my face three steps from the apartment, if I could have navigated the stairs in the first place.
I didn’t quite feel so comfortable, especially now that I was uncertain of Alexander’s intentions. He wouldn’t give me a last name, he didn’t divulge much information even when he claimed he would answer my questions, and he seemed entirely disinterested in any subject I brought up. Why had he even invited me? Why had he stopped to share a drink if he really had too much on his mind to pay any real attention to me?
I thought of Christian in that moment, how he doted on me every chance he got, and I felt ungrateful. Maybe he wasn’t the sexy, mysterious type, and maybe I wasn’t nearly as attracted to him as I was to Alexander, but I’d been through this before. I’d chased the handsome, suave guy, the charismatic enigma, and I’d practically been left at the altar. With Christian, I knew exactly where I stood, what to expect, and the future we could build together. That was the reason I’d chosen him and wanted to pursue our lives together.
I needed to get the hell away from Alexander. Everything about him spelled danger.
I said, “Look, if you have other things you need to do, go ahead. I have no idea what those things might be, but don’t let me interrupt your very important work.”
“Don’t be like that,” he said, his eyes lined and apologetic. “I’m not myself tonight. I’m sorry. I wanted you to come so I could get to know you better when it wasn’t so crazy.”
That, at least, meant something, though I didn’t quite know what. He wanted to get to know me better. Did he want friendship? Was he just looking to get in my pants and put another notch on his belt? Or was there something serious riding beneath the surface?
“And why do you want to get to know me?” I asked, my tone still harsh.
“I like you. I just have a lot on my mind.”
I scoffed. “Don’t we all?” I finished my drink and stood. “Look, thanks for the invitation and the drink. I like the club, but I’m leaving. Have a good night and a nice life.”
I turned and marched toward the door, zeroing in on Crystal, who had started dancing with a guy who looked like a giant next to her, towering at least a foot and a half taller. I shoved my way through the crowd and bumped into people, but I didn’t care. My rage overwhelmed me.
But just before I hit the dance floor to collect my roommate, I felt a hand on my shoulder, and Alexander whirled me around to face him. “Wait. Don’t leave.”
I glared at him, and he let go of me. His shoulders slumped, and he said, “I’m sorry. Like I said, I’m not myself right now. I don’t mean to be rude.”
I didn’t buy it. He’d issued the invitation and made the first move. If anything was ‘complicated’, it was my situation, not his. I could only think of one reason why he would act so nervous and fail to take any further initiative. Throwing my hands up in exasperation, I gave him one last chance. “What’s complicated, Alexander? Honestly, what could be so difficult for you? Do you have a girlfriend?”
He winced, and I expected him to say yes. I prepared to rail at him for lying and pretending he gave a damn when he already had someone, but he surprised me. “Well, no. I don’t.”
“Then, I can’t see what could possibly make this complicated.” Without giving him a chance to respond, I pivoted on my heel and shoved to the middle of the dance floor. I grabbed Crystal, startling her, and shouted, “We’re leaving.”
“But I’m…” she started to protest, but I already had her arm and started dragging her away from her tall, lanky interest. “Kathryn! Wait!”
“No.” I was done. I wanted to go home, and I wouldn’t let her convince me otherwise. And I sure as hell didn’t want to leave her here and risk her going home with some crazy guy she’d just met. It was one thing to bring someone home where we could watch out for each other, but I wouldn’t leave her alone in a club. “Sorry, but I need to get out of here.”
Finally outside, I took a deep breath of humid night air and felt a little more settled. My fury still consumed me, but I could handle it now, without raging hormones filling the air to distract me and a handsome but stubborn man facing me and trying to lead me on. I ignored Crystal’s whining and questioning as I pulled out my phone to dial a cab. I didn’t feel like walking tonight.