Chapter 3
Zane
After nearly an hour of trying to get into Sam’s computer, I finally gave up.
I was searching the fridge, trying to decide between the delicious dishes the cook had left, when I heard the front door open. I winced. Sam never came home for lunch, and my dreams of having a peaceful day faded.
I ignored her arrival until she came into the kitchen. I kept my head in the fridge, hoping she’d ignore me and go upstairs.
“Did you sleep well?” she asked.
Slowly, I straightened, and when I turned to look at her, I was confused. Sam didn’t look angry or impatient, and she wasn’t gloating about anything. In fact, she looked much like I remembered her in the past – passive and stoic. She didn’t have a scowl on her face or look of disgust in her eyes.
“I don’t know how well I slept, but at least I slept late,” I said, suspicious. I didn’t care if her almost cheerful demeanor was real or feigned; it was still too unusual for me not to be concerned. “What are you doing home?”
She smiled brightly. “I came for you. I thought we should talk about that job for you in the oil business.”
She was relentless, and I scoffed. “You’re kidding me, right? You think I want to what, work with your dad and his buddies? Are you high?”
“No, I’m not.” I couldn’t believe Sam didn’t turn into the demon that had come to reside inside her when I made comments like that. Her face didn’t change, and even her eyes didn’t spark with irritation. But I knew it was only a matter of time. “And I am serious. I think it would be good for us anyway. You’d have something in common with my dad.”
I shook my head and laughed. “Sam, your dad and I have never had anything in common. And I don’t particularly want to try to create that sort of bond now, either. And there’s nothing you can do that’s going to convince your ass of a father to trust you or hand over his business to you. I’m sorry about that, but it’s just the way things are.”
She stood there, and I could see her hiding that forlorn reaction she didn’t want me to see. Deep down inside, Sam knew very well that I was being completely honest and that I was right on all counts. But she was determined, and she screwed up her face into a glare that didn’t even begin to scare me, considering the sadness that still shone through. “And what happens when they take the money away?”
I shrugged. “Then you’ll figure something else out. You always do. And you’ll be free to be with whoever you want, whenever you want. So will I.” All of a sudden, I had an idea, and I had to jump on it while Sam was showing a little vulnerability, or it would never work. “Hey, I’ve been waiting on something to come through my email about the club. It’s a business contract and some other mumbo jumbo I’m supposed to read for changes to city ordinances. But I haven’t seen it come in, and I should have had it a couple days ago at least. I think it might have come into your email account by mistake. Could I get your password so I can check?”
Her suspicion was instantaneous, and she narrowed her eyes. I turned casually and took what looked like chicken enchilada casserole out of the fridge and read the label taped to the top. Remove cover, place napkin over dish. Heat in microwave six minutes or until warm all the way through. I started working on it as if I didn’t care if she gave me the information I wanted or not.
With her hands on her hips, she spoke slowly. “First of all, that doesn’t make any sense. How would anyone involved in your club business get my email and then proceed to mix it up with yours, the man who owns the place?”
“It’s not that hard to mistype it, even without knowing your address. I mean, Z and S are pretty close together on the keyboard, and those letters are the only difference in our emails.” It was the best I could come up with on the fly.
She shook her head, crossing her arms and then dropping them to her sides. She crossed them again and said, “Even if I believed that was a concern, which I don’t, you don’t need to get into my computer or my email. I may rule with a tight fist, but I’m not mean, Zane. If I got an email related to club business, I would tell you about it or forward it to you. Why do you really want to get into my email?”
I sighed. “I told you already. Believe me or don’t. I have no reason to lie at this point. You already think I’m a cheater.”
She laughed sarcastically. “Oh, that’s right. I meant to tell you about it. I know for a fact you’re a cheater, Zane.”
I scowled but didn’t look at her. I stared at the dish in the microwave, turning round and round as the timer counted down. What new proof did she have? My heart pounded as I waited for her to throw her evidence in my face.
I could hear the smile of triumph in her voice as she said, “I paid your girlfriend a visit this morning.”
I froze. The microwave beeped as the timer hit zero, and I heard the click of Sam’s heels as she stepped closer to me.
“That’s right, Zane. I know where she lives, and I went to see her. I told her to stay away from you or she would regret it. And if you keep making things difficult for me, I can keep paying her visits.”
I heard the threat in her voice, and I was nauseated. I was too sick to be livid. Instead, I slowly went about my business of grabbing the plate and taking it to the island. I pulled a bar stool up and grabbed a fork from the drawer. I wasn’t hungry anymore, but I knew I had to eat. And having something to do with my hands would keep me from choking Sam to death.
“You don’t have anything to say now, do you?” she gloated.
“Actually, I do,” I replied, keeping my voice calm and even, despite the fear and rage in me. They were coming together to make me truly ill. “What happened to us? To you and me? I remember what it was like ten years ago, when we got married. Don’t you?”
She shrugged, fidgeting with her arms and tapping her foot impatiently. She wouldn’t meet my gaze. “Sort of.”
I shook my head and felt sad for some reason. “Come on, Sam, you know how we were. We never loved each other, but back then, we were almost friends. We had a good time together. We could drink together, go out and party together, see a movie or go to a Texans game together.”
“Sure, but that was just like any other couple on a honeymoon. We were just happy to have that money. It was all a lie from the start, Zane. It didn’t matter what we did. We just wanted to have a little fun while we were young.”
“It was definitely a win-win situation. You came to me because you saw an opportunity, and we didn’t have this mutual hatred of each other. We went into this deal with respect. I wanted to see you happy. I wanted to be that pristine husband your parents expected so that you could get your hands on your money. You seemed so confident when we first met, and that’s part of the reason I was attracted to you. I mean, you were gorgeous and rich and had a wild side, and all of that made you look like the perfect date.”
I saw the hint of a smile, the closest she ever came to really letting her lips curl up at the edges, and I continued, “But when you came to me later and proposed the deal, there was something desperate in you, and it had broken your confidence. When you told me about your father and the trust fund, I wanted to see the son of a bitch eat his words. I wanted you to get that confidence back because, in my opinion, that’s what made you truly sexy. I knew you’d find a great man for you some day, if I could just help you get the money you needed to be independent from your father.”
Sam snorted. “And here I thought you were in it for the club and your sweet little mother. For the love of god, Zane, stop trying to turn yourself into some sort of gallant savior.”
“That’s not the point,” I told her. “And yes, money for the club and the allowance for my mom sweetened the deal. And that proves the point I was actually trying to make, Sam. When we started this, the agreement was that it wouldn’t last forever. We’ve already taken it further than I think either of us intended. But your father is never going to be happy with anything you do, and I know I keep saying it. But it’s true, and I’m going to say it until you actually admit it to yourself.”
Her face was expressionless. “Are you done?”
I sighed and rubbed my eyes. “What I’m trying to say is that, in the beginning, we were friends, or at least allies. We were in this together. It was a team effort, and we operated as partners. I gave you the appearance of a perfect, stable, mature life, and you gave me the money for the club, and a generous allowance to help get my mom out of debt.”
And that was exactly how I’d landed myself in this situation. Not only had I wanted the club, but when my father fell ill and died, the cost of healthcare for him had left my mother up to her eyeballs in debt.
I’d hoped my father’s life insurance would help with that, but the measly fund had barely covered the funeral expenses, much less paid off the house and medical bills that piled up. Marrying Sam meant getting the club, and being able to get my hands on enough money to start paying off that debt for my mother so she could move on with her life and not end up in the hole after all the hard work she’d done to make something of herself. I didn’t want her working far into her sixties and seventies.
But the benefits had dwindled quickly, and now, Sam had become impossible to handle. She was everything I hated about women – controlling, insecure, high-maintenance, and too attached to her father.
She glanced at me and then looked down at her toe, tapping wildly on the floor.
I was tired of this conversation, of trying to go easy on her. “When exactly did that change? When did you become a warden that held me prisoner?”
“Oh, please, spare me the melodrama, Zane. You act like I’m some sadist who beats you when you do something I don’t like.” She rolled her eyes, but she still fidgeted nervously. Or maybe, finally, out of guilt.
I laughed sarcastically. “I honestly don’t know why you haven’t. What happened to you, Sam? There’s got to be something left of the Sam I knew ten years ago, the Sam I wanted to help.”
Her expression changed. I could see the single wrinkle in her perfect nose that registered the disgust she was trying to hide. And that disgust wasn’t meant for me, or she would have sneered at me. She was disgusted with something else – herself or the circumstances, or maybe even her father.
“Look, I had dreams and aspirations, too, and I thought this would be over easy as 1-2-3. But the conditions of having access to my trust fund are ongoing. I hadn’t counted on that any more than you did. But that’s the fact of the matter. If either one of us steps out of line, it’s cut off faster than you can blink. My father doesn’t play games, and he doesn’t give second chances. I’m not going to let you screw it up, and if that means I have to lean hard on you and keep the pressure on, then that’s what I’m going to do.”
I stood and moved to stand directly in front of her until there were only inches between us. “So what if he cuts it off?” I said. “I’m making money at the club. You’re making money at…what you do.”
“So?” she challenged. “What’s your point?”
I couldn’t believe she didn’t see it. “We don’t need your father’s money now. We could go our separate ways, have our freedom, and be happy. We can support ourselves. We have more than enough to keep up our lifestyles.”
Sam met my gaze for a few seconds and then looked away, scratching the back of her neck. It was another nervous habit she had, and I knew she was about to tell me something I didn’t want to hear. “It’s not as much as you think, Zane.”
“It’s plenty, and it’s still coming in,” I argued. “The profits from the Machine add up fast, Sam, and if you need me to, I can kick a little extra to you when we part ways. I hate my life. And I think you hate yours, too.”
She stepped back and glared at me with a defiant attitude. “You’re right, Zane. The money comes in fast. But we’re losing it just as fast as it’s coming in.”
I stared at her in shock, unwilling to believe what she was telling me. But it was true. The expression on her face—part defiant, part devil-may-care—said it all. All this time, I thought she’d at least been making money, even if I didn’t agree with how she was going about it. Now, I felt like I’d fallen for a lie. I didn’t even know how much was there and how much had been lost. There was no way to know, without tracking down bank records I didn’t have access to.
I was so angry I couldn’t even speak. I don’t know how long I stood there, but I gave up. In a huff, I stormed out of the kitchen, my food forgotten and my appetite so far gone I wasn’t sure I would ever find it again.
I didn’t care about anything anymore. I just wanted to be left alone to live my life. To be with Kathryn.