Chapter 11
Kathryn
I had colorful dreams, very intense, but as I came awake Thursday morning – one of my rare weekdays off from the hospital – most of them faded from my memory. I felt disoriented, images of Christian and Alexander blending together, with the faces fading in and out on the same person across the table from me. I groaned as I remembered the night before, and I realized that was the source of my crazy, confused dreams.
As I zombie walked out of my room with my eyes half open, I yawned and rubbed my face, finding Crystal pretty much doing the same thing as she clomped off to the bathroom. Since she got there first, I had to wait, and I figured I would walk downstairs and grab our daily newspaper.
When I opened the door, I thought maybe I hadn’t quite finished waking up yet. The sun blinded me, but the reflection of the beams off what looked like an entire garden of lilies hurt even more. I frowned and counted what had to be seven different arrangements, and as I looked up, the delivery guy was bringing three more. He smiled. “There are two more in the truck. Give me a minute, okay?”
I was speechless. Twelve? Twelve dozen lilies? Who would send me that many flowers? Christian had bought me a single rose once, in a restaurant where a guy was practically hocking them and made any guy on a date who didn’t buy one look like a careless cheapskate. But I didn’t see him doing this.
“I’ll be right back,” I told the delivery guy, and I pounded up the stairs, wide awake now.
I practically ran into Crystal, who was still sleepy enough that she hadn’t noticed I already went downstairs and was halfway down the flight. “You have to see this,” I told her, and she frowned at me.
“See what?” she asked on another yawn.
Rather than answer her, I grabbed her hand and pulled her the rest of the way down, moving so fast she almost tripped and fell on her face. “Hey!” she protested, but I had her attention as I opened the door to the sight. “Oh my god!” she giggled.
I asked, “What did you do last night?” These had to be for her, some sort of obsessive suitor. “Are you going to have a stalker now? Because if that’s the case, I need you to sign for these and call the cops right now, before we both end up dead and buried with a couple of scream queens playing us in a ‘based on a true story’ movie.”
She shook her head, though. “I was home last night.” She giggled some more, jumping up and down in bare feet and a long shirt. She hadn’t put on any leggings yet. “I told you that dress was perfect! Christian must have loved it!”
“The delivery is for Kathryn Stark. I need a signature,” the delivery guy said, holding out his clipboard and a pen.
Crystal elbowed me, waggling her eyebrows, and I rolled my eyes. I scratched out some semblance of a signature, and the guy was on his way. I held my arms out in exasperation and bewilderment. “I guess we need to take them all upstairs.” Together – and carefully – we each carried two at a time, which meant only three trips up and down the stairs. It still wore on us, since we hadn’t had breakfast, and I desperately needed my coffee.
To my delight, Crystal started the pot brewing as I locked the door and started to arrange the lilies around the place. Our apartment was a good size, but finding a place for all of these wasn’t going to be easy by any means. They all had notes, but they were simply signed with a name.
Alexander.
I couldn’t believe this.
“These aren’t from Christian,” I mumbled as I set three of the arrangements across the kitchen counter.
“What?” Crystal asked, staring at me blankly.
I sighed and scrubbed a hand over my face. “They’re from Alexander.”
“What? But how does he even know where you live?”
I had no clue. That’s why I felt so strange. It was a lovely gesture, but I couldn’t imagine how – or why – he would have my address.
“I told you there was something strange going on!” she exclaimed, coming around the counter and smiling at me with that look I’d come to know. I prepared for her latest conspiracy theory. “He’s got to be undercover, some sort of CIA or FBI agent. Maybe he’s trying to bust someone at one of the bars for embezzlement or something. But he’s got to be a secret agent or a private investigator or something if he can find that kind of information on you.”
I certainly hadn’t given it to him, but I couldn’t buy into her crazy ideas. “No, he’s not the type.”
“This is an apology for the other night, isn’t it?” she asked, starting to look through the cards. But she looked disappointed. “There’s nothing but his name on these. Come on!” Now, she was talking to herself and on a mission, checking all the notes.
I groaned. “It’s not an apology for that.”
I hadn’t told her about last night, and she eyed me suspiciously, crouched down beside two of the arrangements.
“What are you talking about?” she asked.
I walked over to the couch and fell into the cushions, folding my legs under me and dropping my head in my hands. “I need coffee.”
Moments later, I could smell the steaming brew under my nose, and I gulped at it as Crystal took a seat beside me.
“What did you do?” she asked, her tone telling me she craved the gossip and wouldn’t let it go until I gave her an answer. She at least gave me a moment’s peace for the caffeine to hit my bloodstream, and for once, I agreed with her that I needed an IV to get it to my head faster.
But taking a deep breath, I finally spilled my guts, from the plan to show Alexander how over him I was, all the way through the moment he decided to kiss me. I shook my head, refusing to look at her, knowing her rapt attention would produce a reaction I didn’t need to see yet. “After that, I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t function right, and I think Christian got annoyed. We stayed long enough for him to finish his drink and pay the tab, and I stayed quiet most of the time. Alexander kept looking at me, and I couldn’t take my eyes off him.”
“You are sprung, sister,” she said.
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not sprung.”
I turned to her, and she raised her eyebrows to her hairline. “Really? I bet you could tell me what he tasted like.”
Mint and something like allspice, but I didn’t say it out loud. “That’s not the point.”
“It most certainly is the point,” she insisted. “Did you dream about him?”
I knew I had, or I wouldn’t have awakened with such a fog and a confusing shapeshifter in my head.
“I don’t remember,” I said. “Look, let’s find the rest of the notes and see if there’s anything to read besides his name. Maybe you’ll think clearer with the coffee and an idea why he would go to this much trouble.”
I couldn’t think of anything better to do to resolve my problem, so I downed the rest of my coffee, took a minute to refill the cup, and sipped it as I started looking with her. I checked two more and stood again, finding nothing, to head to the next two. “Over here,” Crystal called, and I turned to see her standing with a tiny envelope in her hand, next to the arrangement beside my bedroom door.
I hurried over, intent on getting answers, and she handed it to me, unopened. I narrowed my eyes at her. “How do you know?”
She winked at me. “It’s the only one in an envelope, and I can see that there’s some writing on it through the paper.” She pointed, and sure enough, I couldn’t read it, but I could see ink on the inside. I tore it open and turned it over, admiring the beautiful penmanship of whoever had written the message for him before reading it.
Twelve dozen lilies, one for each time I’ve thought of kissing you since you left. Please meet me Saturday, at Hermann Park near the paddleboats. I’ll be there at noon. Don’t disappoint me, or yourself. – Alexander
I bit my lip as I read it, and then I handed it to Crystal to read, since I couldn’t quite bring myself to read it out loud. She looked up at me with a question in her eyes. “What are you going to do?” she asked quietly.
I didn’t have a good answer. I really wanted to go, but I wasn’t sure it was a good idea. “Are you working today?” I asked.
She shook her head. “No, Myra’s taking inventory and stuff. Since I’ve helped the last three quarters, she gave me the day off.” Myra owned the shop Crystal managed, and I was suddenly indebted to the older woman.
“Let’s make breakfast before I make any hasty decisions. You know I don’t think straight without my coffee and a full stomach.” Reluctantly, she agreed, and I could tell she was ripe to give me her opinion. So, as I scrambled the eggs and she put biscuits on a baking sheet, I asked, “What would you do?”
“You know what I would do, but we’re not cut from the same cloth, sister,” she said with a short chuckle. “What you want to know is what I think you should do.”
“So?” I asked expectantly.
“You want to meet him, so go. That’s what I say. But I also think you should call Christian first.”
I balked. “No way. Why would you even consider that?”
“Come on, Kitty-Kat. The guy already kissed you, and you haven’t even mentioned to your boyfriend that you snuck over to see him twice, at two different bars, and that he kissed you. With Christian a few steps away!” She sounded exasperated that she had to be the logical one here. “I don’t approve of you settling down with Mr. No Personality, but I also don’t think you’re being fair if you go on a date with a guy who just sent you over a hundred flowers and kissed you behind your boyfriend’s back.”
She had a good point, but I wasn’t going to back down. “I can’t just toss Christian back in the pond, not when I have no idea if anything is even going to come of this. Alexander is a big, fat question mark. Christian might not be an exclamation point, but he’s a period. I need to settle down and get married. Look, this is just a trial. I can go meet Alexander at the park, check him out away from the club and the bar, and see who he really is. Then, I can feel better about either sending him packing or, if by some chance, I really believe things will work out, letting Christian off the hook.”
Crystal scoffed. “I can’t believe you. You’re the one who always wants to play it safe. And you’re the one who keeps talking about honesty and predictability. But you want to sneak around to check out some other guy as a prospect and not even warn the guy you’ve been seeing for three months.”
She made me feel like a horrible person, and by the time breakfast was over, I didn’t know what to do. I stepped out for a walk, just a stroll down the street, and I ended up just outside of the main square downtown. I watched people walking by – some with their dogs, others holding hands. Happy couples smiling and laughing and playful. I wanted that. I’d had that, or at least, the lie that felt like it, with Jarrett, and I missed that feeling of the love always being brand new.
I didn’t think I’d ever feel that passionate with Christian, but who knew what could happen as time went on? At least I’d feel secure, in a way I never had before. We’d be stable.
But Alexander offered something more, something that would allow me to grow and discover something new. Safe was boring, and I thought I was okay with that.
Until he kissed me.