I checked my phone. Dammit. I stepped up my pace. There was an ovulation chart to take into consideration, and I’d promised Casey I’d be back in three hours. Unfortunately, there’d been label bigwigs in attendance, and I was expected to kiss their asses for a reasonable amount of time after the concert, so by the time I was able to leave the venue, it was already pushing four hours, and Casey’s window of opportunity was closing… according to her, not science.

Casey was probably already lying in bed waiting impatiently for me to deposit my seed. She’d expect me to be locked and loaded the minute I walked through the door. I sighed. There was nothing sexy about baby making, at least not the way we were doing it. But failure was not an option. I had to put a baby in her stomach, or all hell would break loose.

Cringing, I thought about our earlier encounter. I hated arguing with her. Usually I was able to hold my tongue, knowing she didn’t really mean the things she said these days. But sometimes Casey just got to me, like when she tried to coerce me into making a baby an hour before I was set to perform. Snapping at her the way I did only made things worse, though. It brought on another one of her marathon crying sessions – which I hated even more than the arguing.

As much as I didn’t want a baby, I hoped to god she got pregnant sooner rather than later because I knew she wasn’t capable of withstanding the myriad emotions that went along with one failed conception after another. After all, this was the woman who’d begun an ovulation chart the same month we started trying. She was leaving nothing to chance, which meant if things didn’t go her way, the progress we’d made in the last couple months would be all for naught.

Believe it or not, this was progress. After her brother died, Casey stayed behind with her family as I continued on with the tour. I was making plans to cancel the whole thing when Linda talked me out of it. There was no point in me sitting around miserable, she’d said, when I could be on the stage making other people happy. It was what both she and Casey wanted, so after a two-week hiatus, I returned to the tour.

Casey joined me a couple weeks later – a broken woman. She floundered for weeks before hitting upon her plan for a baby. Initially I’d been reluctant, but after we began trying, her mood improved, so I jumped onto the baby train feet first. No matter that I had a deep fear of being a father; my issues had long since taken a backseat to hers, and I gladly focused my energy on her recovery instead. Still, I hated that she was questioning my loyalty. I had never once given her any reason to doubt it. Giving up on her was not an option.

My phone buzzed in my pocket. I purposely ignored it at first because I assumed it was one of the crew with a problem, and I wasn’t turning back around. But then I worried it might be Casey, so I pulled it out of my pocket and checked the screen. Luke. Fuck! Why was he calling me? He only dialed my number when things had gone to shit and he wanted me to relate the information.

I drew in a sharp, ragged breath before forcing myself to answer. “Hey, Luke.”

“Hey. Is Casey with you?”

“No. I’m just walking back to the bus. Do you want me to get her?”

“No, that’s why I called you.”

I could hear the stress in his voice and instantly sensed trouble. Tension settled in my shoulders.

“Why? What’s wrong?”

Luke hesitated.

“Luke, what’s wrong?”

“Okay, so…Mom’s in the hospital.”

I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me. My thoughts shifted straight to Casey. She couldn’t take much more. “Why? What happened?”

“Doctors think it might be a mild heart attack. With her high blood pressure and all the stress of the past few months, it’s taken its toll on her.”

“Jesus,” I exhaled. “Is she going to be all right?”

“Yeah, she’s doing okay. The doctors aren’t even sure if it was actually a heart attack yet. It’s possible she just had a panic attack. They’re running more tests. But Jake, regardless of what they show, Mom’s really run down. She needs a break, and I know that Casey’s not doing great herself, and you guys are on tour and everything” – Luke’s voice wavered – “but I think I’m really going to need her.”

“Yeah, of course, but…” I hesitated, knowing Casey didn’t want her family worrying about her. “She’s pretty fragile herself.”

“I know but she has to be more help than Dad. He has zero patience with Sydney.”

“Okay, let me talk to Casey. I’ll get her on a plane.”

“Thanks, Jake. Sorry to keep dumping all this on you. It’s more than you signed up for.”

“No, it’s not. I’ll call you back soon.”

“Thanks, man.”

* * *

Casey took the news about as well as could be expected. Of course, she wanted to get to her mother right away, but she would have to wait a few hours for flights into Arizona. I’d been making plans to go with her when Luke called back to let us know Linda hadn’t had a heart attack but was suffering with an acute case of heartburn that simulated chest pains. She was expected to remain in the hospital a few days to undergo further testing.

I held Casey as we waited for her to board the plane. I’d brought along a small army of bodyguards with me today because I wanted to protect Casey from any further stress, and to be honest, I was in no mood myself to deal with a fan encounter.

“Sorry I didn’t get home sooner last night. We never had a chance to make a baby.”

“I know. Bart will just have to wait another month.”

“Bart will have to wait a lifetime because I’m never naming my kid that.”

We laughed at our shared joke before her face took a turn for the serious.

“Jake, I don’t know when I’m coming back. If my mom needs help, I might have to stay.”

I nodded solemnly. I knew it was coming, but hearing it from her made it more real. It’s not that I didn’t want her to help out her family; it was that so much distance between us probably wasn’t the best thing for our relationship right now.

“What’s that look?” she asked, running her fingers along my face.

“Look?” I asked, adopting an air of innocence. “I don’t have a look.”

Casey touched the space between my brows. “Liar. I can always tell when something’s bothering you by the crinkled ridge that forms here.”

“You’re scarily perceptive,” I replied, with the hint of a grin.

Wrapping her arms around my neck, she gave my lips a lingering kiss. “I’m going to come back.”

I placed my hands on her hips and stared deeply into her brown eyes. “I know you will.” Though in the back of my mind, I wasn’t so sure.