Chapter Five
Madison
I turn my purse upside down over the kitchen counter, dumping all its contents out. Bits of broken crackers tap on the hard surface and coins roll off the marble slab and onto the floor. No keys. I groan. Will there ever be a day where I get to where I’m going on time? Not likely. I have to get to work on time today. I’ve been late every day this week and so has Aiden. He has a hard time keeping up as it is and my tardiness isn’t helping him at all. No matter how early I wake up to get ready there is always something that seems to slow my progress.
“Mommy, you forgot…”
I raise my hand up to Aiden, quieting him before he has a chance to finish what he wants to say. Normally I’d let him talk, but I don’t the have time to go searching for something he’s lost when my keys are still missing. “Aiden, not now. I can’t find my keys and we were supposed to be on the road ten minutes ago.”
“But mom…”
“Aiden, I said not now okay.”
Running into the living room I dig between the couch cushions and feel around before lifting them and throwing them onto the floor. I am trashing the house even more than the kids have done this morning and I couldn’t care less at the moment. I don’t know why looking for my keys has become part of my everyday routine, but it has. Heaven forbid I put them in the same place where I can find them when I need them the next day. Unfortunately, with all the chaos that goes on around here, I get sidetracked quite often. Since I’m always trying to help Aiden be organized to make his daily activities easier, it’s difficult to keep my own things in order. It’s become so hectic, I may have to start making a list for myself. I wish I could be as diligent at home as I am at work. Everything would go much smoother.
The doorbell rings and I rise from my knees, abandoning the task of looking for my damn keys and stomp into the foyer. “Are you kidding me right now? Who the Hell would be at my door this early in the morning?” I freeze as my hand makes contact with the doorknob when I remember what I did last week. I’d been so distracted that night when I came home, I completely forgot to cancel the order I made. It had to be that delivery. Who else could it be at my door? The only person that ever visits me is Tyler and he wouldn’t ring the doorbell because he has a key. I peer out of the window by the door and catch a glimpse of a delivery uniform.
Panic creeps up my chest and into my throat thinking of Ryder being on the other side of the door. I put my hands up to my hair and notice I haven’t even brushed it since I got out of the shower this morning. My curls are knotted and damp, and I only have one shoe on. And if that wasn’t enough, I haven’t even applied any makeup to my face either. I was planning to put it on quickly once I dropped the boys off to save some time.
The chime of the bell echoes in my ears and my heart races nervously as I try to decide what I should do. I’m cemented to the floor. Maybe if I didn’t answer the door he would leave one of those little yellow ‘sorry we missed you’ notes; but that isn’t the brightest idea either because he’d have to come back and redeliver it anyway.
I bunch my hair in my hand and quickly twist it into a messy bun and kick my one shoe off in the corner. Hopefully I don’t look as bad as I think I do and he won’t go screaming for the hills at the sight of me. I gather up enough strength to turn the doorknob and swing the door open, only the man I was expecting to be standing there, isn’t. Instead of Ryder, a much shorter, much younger man with red hair is staring back at me. I don’t know whether to feel relieved or disappointed.
“Ms. Moore?” The young man asks as he looks at the box in his hands.
“Yes?”
"I just need you to sign for the package."
For some reason I feel like crying. My chest aches from holding back the tears that want to escape. I know it’s probably due to all the stress I’ve put myself through this morning, but deep down I was hoping Ryder would be the one standing in front of me and not this college aged kid who didn't make my heart skip a beat at all. In that one meeting with Ryder my whole body screamed for his touch and gentle words. He seemed sincere and I really should give him a proper thank you for saving Aiden from a serious head injury. But, I can’t do that now. Now I have to sign for a package I really didn’t need in the first place.
"Miss? Are you okay?"
I clear my throat. "Yes. I’m fine." I sign for the package, but curiosity gets the better of me. "Will you be working this route now?"
"No, I'm just filling in for the regular driver. I think he went on vacation for the week."
"Oh." I take the box and close the door behind me. I lean my head back against the door, staring up at the ceiling and inhale a deep breath. At least I didn’t have the opportunity to make a complete fool of myself. Dropping the box by the door, I make my way back over to the couch to search the rest of the cushions for my missing keys.
"Mom."
"What is it Aiden? I'm kind of busy right now."
He raises his hand, jingling the silver metal keys in front of my face. "You left the keys in my backpack yesterday when we came home."
"You had them the whole time? Why didn't you tell me?"
"You told me not now."
I grab the keys out of his hand, slip on my shoes, and usher the boys out of the house. I speed through traffic after dropping off the boys and make it to work only ten minutes late. Of course, Tyler is already here. He is never late. That is the one and only thing that really irritates me about him. Otherwise, he is absolutely perfect. I couldn’t have asked for a better friend.
“Well, you’re almost on time.”
“Ha ha. Can’t you ever be late once Ty? I’d love to look like somewhat of a responsible employee once in a while.”
“We all can’t be perfect darling.”
I huff out an aggravated breath. “That’s for sure.”
“What’s bothering you? The boys okay?”
I sigh. “The boys are fine. It’s just that...I did something last week that I regretted this morning.”
Tyler hops up on the desk. His eyes widen as he crosses his long legs. “You naughty thing. Spill it!”
“Don’t be ridiculous, it’s nothing that has to do with sex.”
His smile falters. “Oh, well then what is it?”
“I ordered a few toys online for the boys…”
“And that’s something you regret? How much did you spend?”
“It wasn’t the money, will you just let me finish already. I wasn’t even going to tell you anything in the first place.”
“Girl, who are you kidding?” You tell me everything.”
“True. Anyway, I didn’t order the toys for them. I bought them for my benefit.”
Tyler’s eyebrow shoots up and a playful smirk pulls at the corner of his mouth. “What kind of toys did you buy?”
“Can you please keep your mind out of the gutter for once please. I’m trying to be serious here.”
“Okay, I’m sorry go ahead.”
“The truth is I wanted to see Ryder again.” I nervously bite my bottom lip, waiting to see what his reaction is going to be. Although I kind of have an idea already.
“You mean that tall, hot, rough, tattooed delivery guy who could not keep his eyes off you the entire time he was in your house?”
“Yes, that guy.”
“I say go for it. He seemed like a decent enough man. He did take to the boys right away. Why would you regret doing something you obviously wanted to do?”
“Because Tyler, no matter how much I want to go out on a date with someone, I can’t.”
“Yes you can, you just don’t want to.”
“No I can’t Ty. I have the boys to think about. Their own father disappointed them and I can’t watch that happen to them again. It’s heartbreaking.”
He takes my hand in his. “Do you think it’s healthy for a young woman to be stuck alone for the rest of her life just because she’s too cowardly to take a chance?”
I snatch my hand away from him. “I am not a coward!”
“I know you’re not, so what are you going to do about it?”
I sigh. “Nothing, absolutely nothing.”