Chapter Twelve
Keying in the last encoded link, Jeremy signed off the computer and stretched in his chair. After a fairly productive afternoon getting three case objectives checked off his upgrade list, he finally let his thoughts wander to Jade.
When he’d been in her apartment to fix the locks that morning he hadn’t noticed anything out of place. However, her apartment wasn’t an area he typically visited so he didn’t know what qualified as normal. Usually, people’s homes felt like the person. Her condo should have been warm, welcoming, cozy, and happy, but that wasn’t what he sensed.
The building had been eerily quiet. He wasn’t trying to be a stalker, but his protective nature insisted he check things out and take a tour.
A rinsed dish sat in the sink, her bed was unmade, and her clothing actually wore a fine layer of dust where they lay on the floor. The shower tiles were dry and a stale. Unlived-in scents masked her softer fragrance. Homes usually smelled like food, soap, cleaning products, or pets. Jade’s smelled … empty.
Her locks were shit, with a hairpin catch and loose hardware. He’d replaced it with an industrial deadbolt and an inner/outer key knob. He also tightened up the weather stripping and replaced the bolts on the hinges.
If she still wasn’t ready to go back, she could stay with him. He had no problem keeping her in his bed. But the real concern was with her vague explanations for her strange behavior lately.
Jade wasn’t a skittish woman and something had really scared her. Losing a debit card didn’t match the sort of anxiety she was showing.
Digging in his cabinets, he found a can of tomato soup and pulled out a pot, finding it sweet the way Jade left the lid right on top. It was odd having someone other than Mia in his house. He’d built it with only his daughter in mind. And every time he found a trace of Mia’s presence a sort of warmth filled him. Now he was finding traces of Jade and he liked that just as much.
Jade teased him about his decorating, which really couldn’t be considered decorating at all. If he saw something girlie, pink, and sporting a princess, he picked it up for Mia. Other than that, his color scheme was white and beige. Some walls weren’t painted with anything more than primer. His carpets were neutral and his furniture was selected with only necessity in mind.
Stirring the soup, he flipped his grilled cheese sandwich. He should probably get some more food in the fridge besides Mia’s snacks, mac ’n cheese, and cold cuts. What did girls eat?
Retrieving a beer, he examined the empty shelves. Girls liked healthy stuff. Next time he went to the store he’d grab some yogurt and produce so she didn’t think he was living off beer and takeout.
What would Mia think if she found out he and Jade were semi-dating? She’d go nuts. His daughter loved Jade and Jade loved Mia, yet something had him adamantly deciding to keep their relationship a secret from Mia for as long as possible.
People broke up because of dumb shit all the time. He couldn’t risk Mia getting attached and things falling through. He wanted something monogamous with Jade, but as far as longevity … he wasn’t sure they could make this work.
Biting into his sandwich, he let his mind drift to the future. Maybe it could work. Maybe she was The One.
They had something good. Real good. Their chemistry was off the charts. She was girlie as hell, but not overly sensitive—aside from her little outburst the other night. She usually rolled with the punches and he liked that.
Then there was her beauty. Green, mesmerizing eyes that clouded with lust when she was aroused and bounced with laughter when she broke his balls. He could stare into those eyes for days.
He frowned, recalling how devastated she’d been the night of the wedding. Her eyes had been so vacant that night, deep pain hidden in the simmering depths. He wished she’d confide in him a little more, but they were still new and he shouldn’t rush things.
Whatever had upset her, he understood it was a personal matter. Maybe something to do with her family? He wanted to protect her, fix whatever got her so worked up, but the most he could do was let her stay here, listen when she spoke, and replace her locks so she would feel safe in her home. It was a start.
For a guy who didn’t relish drama, he sure was a sucker for Jade in distress. So used to her boisterous independence, seeing her sad knocked the wind out of him. It made her more … human, less intimidating.
He hadn’t spent the night with a woman since returning from Iraq. It was too risky. But with Jade, he wanted more than a booty call. He wanted to hold her and wake up beside her. So long as he woke up like a normal guy and not some PTSD tragedy.
Gasping out of sleep in a cold sweat, muscles tense, ready to fucking kill someone was not the guy he wanted to show Jade. Scrambled fucking dreams were not something men cry about, especially not in front of a woman who never seemed to flinch when life took a swing.
But seeing that she had her own demons to fight—whatever they were—gave him the confidence to chance her seeing him in that unfavorable light. Who wasn’t a little broken at this stage of life? He had to remind himself that no one was perfect and if she did see the scars he hid inside, she might not flinch then either. He believed she wouldn’t.
Jade was tough, but not invincible. Her sarcasm kept people at a distance. Having her open up to him, show a bit of her vulnerability the other night, enhanced his desire tenfold. It made him feel special, important, knowing she didn’t share those sides of herself with just anyone. His protective instincts kicked in and the urge to shelter her from further distress hit hard.
Pushing his plate away, he looked at his watch. Only a few more hours until midnight. He liked having her in his home, in his bed. The house already seemed a little empty without her, but she’d be back soon.
His body hardened with anticipation. He needed to blow off some steam so he headed to the basement for a late night work out. Soon enough she’d be back, and for reasons he didn’t want to identify just yet, that made him incredibly happy. Locks fixed or not, he liked having her with him.