Chapter Sixteen
Trixie barked, springing off the bed. Jade was so weak the jostling sent fissures of pain shooting through her body. The dog bolted out of the room.
“Jade?”
She opened her eyes but made no move to uncover her face from the blankets and pillows. The mattress dipped. Turning stiffly, she found Kat looking at her with concern and Tyson standing tall behind her, appearing worried as well. The dog raced around the room, howling with excitement to have her people back.
“Are you sick?” Kat asked.
No matter how much she wanted to put her troubles aside and lose herself in her friends’ romantic adventures, there was no hiding the pain welling up inside of her. A tear escaped and rolled into her matted hair.
“Jade, honey, what’s wrong?”
When she tried to talk all that came out was a raw sob. Kat pulled her into a hug, rocking and soothing much like a mother does with for her child, and Jade cried in earnest.
“Jade, what’s happened? Do you need a doctor?” Easing her back, Kat looked into her eyes. “You’re pale and your eyes are puffy. You’re a wreck.”
“I’m so glad you’re home,” she bawled and Kat continued to hold her.
The thought of having so much to explain exhausted her before she spoke a single word. There was nothing Kat could do to change her circumstances, but having her near was the most comfort she’d felt in days.
As her cries dwindled to shivers and shuddered breaths, she shut her eyes and rested against her friend’s lap. It was a closeness she needed, one she couldn’t get from anyone else.
When she awoke again, it must’ve been in the middle of the night. Kat was sleeping in a chair next to the bed and Tyson was gone. Numbness set into her hip and she forced herself to sit up.
“You’re awake,” Kat whispered. Her grim expression showed in the shadows. Jade’s outburst had obviously scared her. “Do you want some water?”
She took the glass from Kat’s hand and greedily swallowed its contents. When she finished, it was too late. “Oh, God—”
Stumbling from the bed, she bolted for the bathroom. Her knees crashed down on the tile floor as she clung to the cool ceramic bowl and puked.
Minutes later, water was running and a cool damp cloth pressed to her brow as she rested her clammy face against the now warming seat of the toilet. She opened her eyes and found Kat kneeling beside her and Tyson standing at the door.
“Jade, I think you need to go to the hospital,” Kat whispered.
“No,” she rasped.
Kat looked at Tyson then back to her. “Ty, see if you can find some crackers and Ginger ale. See if we have tea, too. If we do, make a cup and add some of the soda to it.”
Once Tyson left, Kat helped her stand. Jade braced her palms on the vanity of the sink and winced at her reflection.
Her hair was a rat’s nest and her skin was paper white. Crescent shaped bruises hung like hammocks under her eyes and her cheeks were sunken in. No wonder Kat was so concerned. She looked half-dead and she smelled fully there.
“I need a shower,” she croaked, her throat raw. She hadn’t spoken more than a few words in days and her esophagus burned from bile.
Kat turned on the shower and adjusted the temperature. As the room filled with swirls of steam, Jade pulled off her pants. As she twisted her arm through the strap of her tank top she froze.
There, in the reflection on the mirror, was the stain of her predicament. The small, angry pucker was beginning to heal and she would be forever branded a victim.
She wanted to claw the mark from her flesh. Fucking motherless whore—cock sucking, scum bag… Her vocabulary failed her. There was no word vile enough to describe the monster that had done this to her.
The ever-present dip and swell that came with thinking of him turned her stomach. Like attempting to thread a needle when too blind to see the hole, she would never have the satisfaction of rightness again. There would be no closure, no justice.
She breathed through her teeth. No one could fix this. No one.
Kat held her arm as she stepped under the spray. Too exhausted to stand, she lowered herself to the floor. Kat adjusted the plug and switched the water flow to the bath faucet.
As the warm water filled the tub, Kat gently washed her hair, pouring a Cookie Monster cup over her shoulders and chest. When she rinsed the remainder of shampoo away she pulled Jade’s hair behind her shoulders and stilled.
Her fingers tentatively touched Jade’s shoulder and Jade flinched, her shoulders curling inward. A myriad of emotions played across Kat’s face as she ran her fingers gingerly over the abused tissue.
Shaking, Jade whispered, “Do you know what it means?”
As her best friend shook her head a crushing disappointment broke another part of her meager reserves. They finished her bath in utter silence.
A little while later, she sat at the kitchen table across from Kat while Tyson made coffee. It was time.
Jade took a deep breath and finally spoke the truth she’d been hiding from. “I don’t want you to tell anyone what I’m about to tell you. If you can’t give me your word, then I can’t confide in you.”
Kat nodded and looked at Tyson, who hesitated but also nodded.
“The night of your rehearsal dinner, Jeremy and I went to the Pink Lounge afterwards for a drink. I only had a few drinks that entire night and was by no means drunk. Jeremy left around nine o’clock, just after I got your text about picking up your ring. I was supposed to leave shortly after him, but I don’t remember getting home. I can’t remember anything after getting your text.”
Kat frowned. “How did you drive if you can’t remember getting to your car?”
“I don’t know. The next morning I woke up in my apartment and knew something wasn’t right. It didn’t take long to realize someone had broken into my home. My purse was dumped all over the floor and my wallet was totally empty.”
Tyson shifted closer to the table, his eyes as dark as storm clouds. “Did you call the cops?”
“That was the least of my concerns at the time. I knew someone had been there. My door was wide open and…” She took a deep breath, her voice seizing. “And … I could … I could feel them … on me. In me. And then… They marked me.”
Kat’s head snapped up, her eyes lit with stark fear. If her friend said anything she’d lose her nerve to finish and she still had more to say, so she quickly continued.
“My only thought was to get clean. I didn’t even think about … about going to the hospital until it was too late. The day after your wedding I finally saw Dr. Bishop and had some lab work done. Luckily, all my results came back negative. They took a sample of my hair, as well, and found Rohypnol in my system, which explains why I can’t remember anything.”
“Jesus,” Tyson hissed.
“In the meantime, Jeremy put a new lock on my door, but I only told him I was robbed. The funny thing is they only took what was in my wallet. They didn’t touch anything else. It was like … like they wanted a souvenir.”
“Oh, Jade,” Kat breathed, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears.
“I’m not finished.” Jade took a shaky breath. “I thought… I thought if I was alive and I replaced all my credit cards, I could get over it like it never happened. I even spent time with Jeremy. I felt safer with him and memories of the … attack faded when he was nearby, but my awareness of what happened never disappeared and it turns out I’m much more fucked up than I ever imagined possible. Aside from the mark on my shoulder, there’s no real proof of it, certainly not in my memory at least. But my thinking is totally damaged. I’m not right. I don’t know if I’ll ever be right again.”
“Oh, Jade…” Twin tears fell down Kat’s cheeks.
“What mark?” Tyson’s scowl pressed deep crevasses into his face.
Jade pulled her collar aside and he cursed.
“Is that a fucking burn?”
“You don’t remember anything?” Kat overrode Tyson’s question.
“I can’t remember one single detail after Jeremy left and, believe me, I tried. I thought I could beat it, but I was wrong. Last time I was at work, Lily ran some more tests. All my blood work came back good, but she noticed something else. It turns out … I…”
Jade couldn’t get the words out. Trembling, tears ran unchecked down her face.
Kat took her hands in hers and squeezed. “Honey, whatever it is, we’re here for you.”
Letting the last of her boundaries fall, she whispered, “I’m … pregnant.”
Stunned, her friend’s confidence visibly faltered. She pulled her into a fierce hug as they wept together.
“What am I going to do?” Jade whimpered.
Kat smoothed her hand over her hair and whispered, “It hasn’t even been two weeks. Maybe it was a false positive.”
“No, I saw my lab work. It’s early, but I’m definitely pregnant.”
“You don’t have to keep it,” Tyson said softly. “You have a choice in this, Jade.”
“I have so much going through my head right now. I don’t even know how I feel about that option.” She wiped her eyes with the heel of her palm. The soft skin surrounding her lashes was chafed from crying so much.
“Did your doctor talk to you about your options?” Kat asked.
“She may have. I was in shock. I can’t really remember what she said past me being pregnant. After that, I came here and went to bed. I’ve been sleeping for days.”
“You haven’t been out of bed since you found out? You should’ve called me.”
“And what, ruin your honeymoon? No, this is my problem.”
“That’s bullshit.” Kat swearing meant she was seriously upset. “We’re your closest friends. We’ll do whatever you need us to do. For starters, you can stay here as long as you need. Right, Ty?”
“Right. Did you tell Jeremy any of this?”
“No.” The horrible empty feeling in her chest exploded as the last words he said to her echoed through her mind.
“Is it…” Tyson hesitated. “Is it possible the baby could be his?”
“No. We never slept together. Besides, Jeremy has nothing to do with this. After I came here we had a huge fight and broke up. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t care about my problems or me anymore. He made that quite clear before he left.”
Kat sighed. “I’m sure that’s not true. Why don’t you give Tyson your keys so he can pick up some of your things before he gets Mia? You can wear my clothes, but I’m sure you want your own. In the meantime, you have to try to eat something.”
After forcing down a cup of broth and some crackers, Jade headed back upstairs. Kat insisted she use their room until she made up the guest room. As she walked the steps she paused and listened as Kat and Ty discreetly whispered.
“Jesus Christ,” Tyson hissed. “The fucker drugged her, raped her, robbed her, and then felt the need to brand her? What kind of twisted fuck does that? Kat, you have to convince her to go to the police and talk her into getting an abortion.”
“I am not going to press her, Tyson. About anything. It’s her body and that baby is as much hers as it is the father’s. Yes, how it got there is despicable and ugly, but I’m not going to try to convince her to do anything that’ll add to the weight on her shoulders, including going to the police. Do you know how unlikely it is they’ll ever find this guy? It’ll just upset her more and she already looks like she’s a tear away from a total breakdown. When she’s ready, she’ll go. But, right now, I’m not going to tell her what to do.”
“She knows nothing about the father except the fact that he’s a criminal and a predator.”
“I don’t care,” Kat snapped. “When I was pregnant with Mia, Jade was the only person who respected my right to make up my own mind in the time frame I needed to decide. She deserves the same, and I, for one, will not take that away from her. Besides, she’s been through enough. Ending a pregnancy is not a simple solution. It’s complicated and extremely emotional. I’m not sure she could bear such consequences after everything else she’s been through. I’ve never seen her like this before.”
Tyson sighed and Jade couldn’t listen to any more. She needed silence. Silence from their opinions. Silence from her thoughts. The only way to find that sort of quiet was through sleep. She trudged quietly up the stairs.