Chapter Eighteen
Tigger
Summer is starting to grow on me. Much more than I ever thought she would. I’m not sure how I should feel about that. On the one hand, I want to back away and run the other direction, but on the other, I want to stay and see where things go with her. I can’t seem to stay away from her. When she’s in the same room with me, I can’t help but put my hands on her. It’s not even all in a sexual way either, I actually want to spend time with her and get to know her. Figure out what makes her laugh and smile, and what makes her sad. Be the one to take away the pain in her eyes.
I’ve been protective of women since Emmy. Since my beautiful sister was taken away from me.
Now, I make all the girls be escorted out to their cars after dark and make sure all the women of my brothers are well cared for.
Even Kara.
That one has got to be the hardest. When I saw her with Dean outside of my office earlier, I wanted the ground to swallow me up whole. It doesn’t hurt as much as it used to, but the pain is still there. I hope one day it’ll be gone for good. I hate feeling weak and shit and pining for my brother’s girl.
Summer has helped some with that. Ever since I started spending time with her, it hurts less and less when I see Kara and Dean together. But tonight, I felt vulnerable. Between what happened with Clara being attacked outside the club and Clara attacking Summer, my emotions are all over the place.
I almost killed Clara when I saw her strangling Summer tonight. If she were a man, she wouldn’t have lived to see the light of day again. As it was, I couldn’t do that, so I did the next best thing, I picked Summer up and cared for her.
I wanted to. It was the strangest thing. Normally when a woman is hurt, I’ll get upset and call someone else in the care for them, but with Summer, I’m the only one that gets to touch her. None of my brothers are allowed anywhere near her. After what happened with Dean and Kara, I won’t lose her too. I’m not sure where things are going with Summer or even if they will ever go anywhere, but having one of my brothers steal her won’t be an option. I allowed it to happen once, it will never happen again.
That’s why I now find myself holding a bacon cheeseburger, and two orders of nacho cheese fries for us to eat in a bag and a cup holder with two chocolates shakes, and standing outside her room knocking on the door.
She doesn’t answer right away, and I start to worry that maybe she’s gone to sleep. But when she opens the door wearing a tiny pajama number, I almost drop what I’m holding. Her outfit is entirely pink, and she looks like she just got out of the shower. The smell of mint permeates the room around us, and I know that if I lean forward and sniff her hair, the smell is going to be all over her body.
Great, now I’m hard imagining her naked under her outfit.
Fuck.
“Hey Tigger, I didn’t think you were going to show up. I thought maybe you forgot about me,” she stands to the side so I can come inside and while her tone is teasing, her eyes tell me that she really thought I forget about her.
“I’d never forget about you,” I tell her, setting the food down next to the bed and turning to face her so I can wait for her to shut the door.
She stands there awkwardly after the door is closed, almost like she’s unsure what she should be doing now that we’re alone in here.
“What do you want to watch?” I ask her, nodding towards the TV and taking the food out of the bag at the same time.
The food seems to break her out of her trance, and she moves towards me, her eyes trained on the wrapped cheeseburger.
She licks her lips, and I chuckle when I hand her the burger, and she immediately climbs up the bed to the far corner and starts to unwrap it and flip through the channels. I’m pleased to find she’s like me and loves bacon cheeseburgers.
“Oh my god,” she moans, taking a giant bite out of the cheeseburger. “This has got to be the best thing I’ve ever tasted.”
I turn away from her trying in vain to control my cock that is now standing fully to attention. Her moan alone is all the motivation my manhood needs to take notice that she’s in the same room.
I quickly sit down next to her on the bed and hand her the shake and fries I got her and grab my own so she can’t see my giant erection poking out between my legs.
“Like action films?” she asks, gesturing to the screen between bites.
I look up to find Taken on the screen. I love that she wants to watch an action film, but I’d even watch a film in Italian right now as long as it meant I could be near her. I’ll take any chance I can get to be near her.
“Love this movie,” I comment digging into my food.
She finishes her food in record time and settles in to watch the movie while I slowly eat my fries. I’m not really hungry, the only reason I continue to eat is so that I have something to distract myself and so she can’t see how my body is reacting to being so close to her. She doesn’t know that my body knows her body like the back of my hand. As much as I want to tell her it’s me, scream it from the rooftop, I don’t know how she feels about me, and she might not want anything more than a casual fuck with me. I don’t think I can take the rejection from her. Especially right now since I’m just now starting to feel more like a human again.
Summer makes me want to be a better person. I don’t have this burning desire to kill Dean and I very rarely yell at the girls anymore. I only did it tonight because I was so upset with Clara’s decisions. I don’t want to admit it to myself, but I need Summer in my life to some capacity. She’s made life better for me, and I don’t feel like I want to kill myself anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I love my brothers and my life here, but before Summer came along, I’ve taken my gun out of my cut half a dozen times to end my life. What did I have left to live for? My dad was murdered, my sister is dead and buried, and who knows what Connoly did to my mother. She’s either a prostitute now, or she’s dead. Too bad I can’t go back to find out.
My attention is drawn to my right side when I feel Summer snuggling up against me. She looks like she’s seconds from dozing off and she’s trying to get comfortable, but can’t seem to figure out how. I quietly set my food down on the nightstand and put my arm around her so she can lean on me.
She takes the invitation, so I toe off my shoes and lower myself further on the bed so she can rest her head on my chest.
Within minutes she’s fast asleep.
I sit with her until the movie is over and for a little while after that, thinking and watching her sleep. I know I need to leave, but I can’t seem to bring myself to do it. I run my fingers through her hair and plant a kiss lightly on her forehead. I know I can’t stay here with her. She’d probably freak out if she woke up to find me here in the bed next to her.
I make sure she’s tucked in tight and turn off the light in the corner of the room so she can at least get a little more sleep. She looked exhausted earlier and probably needs the rest. I look at her one last time when I make it to the door and with a heavy sigh shut the door behind me and head back over to my room.
I sit in there for fifteen minutes on my bed staring at her closed door. I think about going over there and lying down next to her, but I can’t do that. I have too much to do right now. We all suspect the same thing that Lefty is the one who attacked Clara in the parking lot tonight at The Dragon. But there are two problems with that theory. The first is that it was too dark and he never removed his helmet for her to see his face and the second is that she has been officially excommunicated from the club after what she did to Summer. I was content with just sending her home for a week and calling it a night. But no, she had to let her jealousy get the best of her, and she ended up losing everything she had going here.
The other issue we have is the comment Clara made about the bouncers being busy inside the club when she went outside. I don’t believe in coincidences. Especially if that was Lefty that was outside the club tonight. Who knows who he is working with. Most of his club was killed the day we rescued Kara, and the rest are all in prison, so he has to be using someone from another club. That is if that was even him.
That’s not a chance we can take. I know the time is coming for me to face my past and tell my club who I really am. I’m not looking forward to that moment, but I’d rather I tell them than have Connoly tell them who I am to him. But I guess we’ll cross that bridge once we get there.
I put my shoes back on, place my cut back on my back, and place my gun inside my waistband. When I have everything in place, I exit my room and lock the door behind me. I have to do some research and see if Lefty is still in prison. That fucker Dean is probably off fucking his wife, and Thunder has his own problems at home with Bella. This is going to be left up to me to do alone this time.
I’m about to head down the hall when I hear a pained scream come from behind Summer’s closed door. Drag’s door flies open, gun drawn in my direction, a wild look in his eyes.
“I got it,” I tell him, gesturing for him to lower his piece.
He scrubs his hand down his face and nods once, going back into his room and slamming the door shut behind him.
I move over to Summer’s door and crack it open so I can peek inside. I find her thrashing around her bed violently, and it breaks my heart. Something is haunting her. I enter her room slamming the door shut behind me and kneel next to her on the bed and shake her. She sits up straight on the bed, her eyes flying open, and her entire body shaking. I’ve never been so scared in my entire life.