Chapter 30

Aurora

Breathe in, tighten your core, and let it out in eight counts.

My Pilates instructor is being especially tough today, but I’m not going to argue, because I know that I need it. I’ve always used physical activity as a means of releasing all of the aggression and tension within my body.

Today is no different.

It’s been a few days since I had that intense, fucking magical experience with Jasper. And let me tell you—I want more. Being with him did nothing to quell my desire for sex.

Where once I was a timid virgin, the Grayson brothers are now opening me up to all manner of servitude…to them. I’d to be their little sex slave and never look back. I’d like to feel that giant cock of Jasper’s in me all the time, day and night.

He lit a fire within me that’s not going to be extinguished anytime soon. One taste of the Grayson brothers was enough to ignite the flames of desire within me for a lifetime.

Having another taste—first of Finn and now of Jasper—well, it’s made lust overwhelm my system, and while I savor the feeling, I need to have an outlet for release.

The way Jasper manhandled my body, the way he fucked me into oblivion, all of that is still fresh in my mind.

I want more of him. I want him every day. I want him to fuck me like that every day for the rest of my life.

So as the Pilates instructor tries to tell me to focus on my core, what’s really going through my mind is how to contain the electricity and fire within.

“Good job, Aurora, breathe out slowly,” he says, perfecting my alignment.

I let myself go into the moment and try to stay grounded.

That’s the only thing that can save me now.

Class ends, and I take a luxurious shower in the locker room. This is no ordinary locker room. It’s outfitted with all the amenities and luxuries a person could want.

I pay good money for access to this club, and so I expect to have John John hair products at my beck and call.

And a cool dipping pool to relax my tired muscles.

I take advantage of the steam shower, my favorite way to detox, and then I breathe in the fine mist and let it out. My stress melts away, and yet my heart is still beating fast, on constant high alert, because I fear I’m falling for two men.

Only an idiot would fall for the Grayson brothers, consummate players that they are, but I can’t shake them out of my mind.

Once I’m bathed, clean, and fresh, I put on my white work suit and blow-dry my hair.

I don’t go to work very often, but today, I have to. There’s just too much happening. I’m worried most of all about the accounts.

My driver picks me up in the town car, and I sink into the deep leather seats as the car winds its way through New York City. We arrive at my parent’s building. I know they died, but I will always think of this as their company.

They live on in my heart, and I guess that’s all that I can count on right now, or ever.

Once inside, Jeffrey, the head of marketing approaches me.

“Aurora, hi, thanks for coming in today. We’re having a hard time filing those orders from Belgium. There’s word going around the office that the company’s in trouble. And our manufacturers feel uncomfortable taking a risk on an unsteady company.”

He walks with me to my office.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me. This can’t happen, Jeffrey. We can’t have any stalling in our timeline. I have it all laid out perfectly, and we need to keep on schedule.”

“I know, I know. That’s what I tried to tell them, but people aren’t listening. Can I tell you the truth?”

I look at him, wondering what the hesitation is all about.

“Of course you can tell me the truth. I have to know everything, Jeffrey. Just tell me.”

He stares at me for a moment, like he’s afraid or something. I can tell that whatever’s on his mind isn’t something he feels like sharing with me.

“What is it?” I probe.

“The thing is, Aurora, people are starting to talk about your brother. They’re starting to say things.”

Oh, great. Anders is getting us in trouble once again. I’ve done my best to keep his addiction a secret, but I knew it couldn’t last forever.

“What kind of things?” I ask him, as though I don’t already know the answer.

“Let’s just say, he’s been seen around town, and he doesn’t look good. People are talking, saying he has a drug problem. Is it true, Aurora? Tell me it’s not true,” he says, pleading with me.

If only I could tell him such good news. I can’t tell him that Anders is okay, but I don’t have to tell him the extent of the problem. There’s no use in worrying him and everybody else in the office.

It’s bad enough that Belgium is starting to pull out of our manufacturing deal.

Where the fuck else am I supposed to get chocolates?

I look at him sincerely and say, “Let me just say that I have it covered, okay? You let me take care of Anders and just make sure Belgium gets back on board. Got it?”

He smiles at me, because he trusts me. He’s known me for a long time. At least, I’m good for my word if Anders isn’t.

Jeffrey remembers Anders the way most people do—when he was strong and vibrant and healthy. Also, I think he’s relieved to not have the weight of that secret on his shoulders anymore. Obviously, the entire office has been talking about it.

Jeffrey was probably the one nominated to tell me the news, to tell me what they’re all thinking. Little does he know that I’ve known about my brother’s problem for a long while. Little does he know how fucking worried I am all the time and that it’s much more serious than anyone else realizes.

Once inside my office, I determine it’s time to crunch the numbers.

I log into the account. It’s become my daily ritual and also the part of my day that I hate the most. Every day, we’re losing money.

That means Anders is doing it, and it also means he’s on god knows how many more drugs. The screen flashes all my account details, and I’m not surprised to see millions of dollars have gone missing...again. What the fuck is he doing out there to spend money like this?

Again, my thoughts go back to the only possible explanation, which is that he’s in bed with some very bad people, likely some very rich people. He’s probably out gambling while he’s high, making poor decisions. I don’t even want to know the details of how far off the mark my brother is.

I’d rather stay in the dark about how bad my brother’s situation is because the truth might break me.

I work throughout the day, and it’s good to have my mind occupied for once. Maybe I should come into the office more often. Maybe if Anders wasn’t pulling me down, I’d be here more often. I’m sick to death of worrying about him.

By the time I leave, the accounts—or what’s left of them—are in order, and our manufacturing is up and running. At least I’ve accomplished something today.

But I go home sad.

My driver goes to my apartment on Park. Inside of the car, I savor the moment, because I don’t know how much longer this can last. If Anders blows through our money, we’ll have to give up the apartment, the driver, the company, and everything else about our life. If he does that to me, I swear I’ll never forgive him.

Once I get to the apartment, I check around for Anders, but I know he’s not there. I don’t even know why I try anymore.

I run an extremely hot bath for myself, pouring in lots of bubbles.

I need a fucking break. The only way I can achieve that right now is through self-care. Someone has to take care of me if my brother won’t.

I sink back into the tub and think about only three things—the faces of the Grayson brothers.

Blue eyes.

Brown eyes.

Green eyes.

My eyes flicker open when I’m reminded that Declan hasn’t called. What is it about me that’s turning him off? Didn’t he have a good time taking my virginity?

Both his brothers have called me since for dates. Declan hasn’t.

The fact that I haven’t heard from him makes me antsy. I want him just as bad as the other two. And yet our relationship hasn’t even gotten off the ground.

I close my eyes and try to forget the situation. I would love to try to forget all of them. But the Grayson brothers are forever etched in my mind.

Thinking of them causes hot lust to pump through my body.

I’m aching and needy for some more of that giant cock, that’s for sure.