The next morning, I drop Kaylee off at school.

I think about her every break in my day.

By my last appointment, I'm chomping at the bit.

"What was it like?" Dean moves into my suite. Leans against the wall. "As good as you imagined?"

"Fuck off. I'm working." I try to add irritation to my voice, but it won't happen. I love that Dean is desperate for details. There's so much I want to say about her. I'm bursting at the seams.

Too bad this client is a mutual friend. And an old friend. One of our oldest and most loyal clients.

Joel lives and dies for this kind of conversation.

I can't use him as an excuse.

Shit, I better—

"Don't hold back for me. I want to hear," Joel says. His voice has that effortless breeziness. Like Walker's, but brighter. Richer. More famous. "Sounds dirty."

"Very." Dean chuckles. "Sex in an alley. That's a hell of a way to lose it."

"Why do you ruin everything beautiful?" Damn, I'm smiling. I can't help it. Life is too fucking good right now. And I'm about to see Kay. One more line and this thing is done.

"You can't know light without darkness," Dean says.

Joel's wavy hair whips his cheeks as he shakes his head. He looks every bit the effortless playboy rock star. He even has the let's not talk about my band shrug down pat.

I didn't know shit about Dangerous Noise until Emma decided it was her favorite band. She's had a few choice posters up on her bedroom walls. Men on beds, stripping out of their clothes, shooting come hither looks.

Joel looks to me. "You buy this shit?"

"Does anyone?" There. I set the gun down. Examine the work.

He turns to the ink. "Fuck, no wonder I keep coming back here. You do good shit."

"And you live four blocks away," I offer.

"Take more credit." His green eyes light up as he laughs. They're lighter than Kaylee's. Greyer.

Hers are more blue.

But it still sends all my thoughts racing back to her—

The way she groaned my name.

Those blue nails sinking into my skin.

The need filling her eyes.

Fuck, I need to get ahold of myself or I'm not going to survive this conversation.

"If it was me, the bragging would never end." He smiles that effortless, casual smile. "This alley girl the one you've been pining over?"

"I don't pine," I say.

Dean scoffs.

Joel too.

"Yeah. He's been pussy free for months now. More even." Dean shakes his head. "I don't know how you do it. One woman. Forever."

"She's the right woman." He holds up his left hand like his wedding ring is an Olympic medal. "You'd get it if any woman could tolerate you for more than—"

"Three minutes," I offer.

"That's cruel. Three minutes?" Joel looks to Dean. "Tell me you do better than that."

Dean laughs. "You make a woman come, she forgets how obnoxious you are."

"Not sure about that." Joel shakes his head. "Not in your case." He turns back to me. "She's the one who was hanging at the counter last time? Blond hair. Librarian look. Fuck, I love the librarian look."

"Watch it. He'll punch you," Dean says

"On my wife." Joel lets out a dreamy sigh.

"Yeah, 'cause a married man has never looked elsewhere," Dean says.

"I'll hit you." Joel curls his hands into fists, but his smile is too wide for him to sell it. "Not as hard as I'd like to, but I will hit you. We're recording shit tomorrow."

"How many times you mention that to Brendon?" Dean asks.

"I didn't know we could be talking about deflowering virgins in alleys." Joel turns to me. "You offering details? As disgusting as possible, preferably."

"If I'm not offering this asshole details, you think you have a good chance?" I ask.

He nods. "I'm only half as obnoxious."

I'm not sure about that.

I've never been one to brag, but fuck, the chance to replay Kaylee under my command... "She was mine."

Joel nods. "Go on."

"That's it," I say.

"Fuck. Maybe Dean is right. Maybe you aren't any fun," Joel teases.

I'm fine with that label. But I did make Kay a promise. "You have any upcoming shows?"

"Always. Why?" he asks.

"Get me tickets and I'll spill."

"Fuck, I'll get you whatever you want. Bella is gonna flip when she sees this." He stares at his new ink. "She'll want one."

"I'll squeeze her in whenever," I say.

He shakes his head. "I don't want you touching her now that I know you have a thing for chicks with glasses."

"You want someone else here touching her?" I ask.

"Good point. There really aren't enough female artists. It's sexist bullshit." Joel turns to Dean. "How come you guys only hire dicks?"

"Nepotism," Dean says.

"It makes the world go round." Joel looks to me. "I'll send over your shit tomorrow. Any date, any venue you want."

"Anything here?"

"Fuck, nobody tells me the details. You think they keep me around for my brains?" Joel laughs.

"Nobody thinks that," Dean agrees.

Joel laughs. "Right back at you."

Dean nods. "It hurts, being this beautiful. Doesn't it?"

"It's our cross to bear." Joel's shrug is playful. Joyful. He's that kind of guy. One who always cracks a joke. "I'm sure we've got something coming up." He lowers his voice. "Now. Tell me... was it good dirty alley sex? Or fucking amazing dirty alley sex?"

My head fills with every detail. "It was perfect."

* * *

Kaylee sets her backpack on the passenger side floor as she slides into the car.

Her eyes light up as they meet mine. "You look like a tool with your sunglasses hanging in your t-shirt."

"This better?" I slide them on and offer her my best cocky smile.

"Much better." She pulls the door closed. Clicks her seatbelt. "First name dropping. Then designer sunglasses—"

"Em gave me these for my birthday."

"I remember."

"That doesn't buy me anything?"

"Not a thing." She smiles as she plays with her seatbelt. "Where are we going?"

"Somewhere you love."

"Which is..."

I put the car in park and pull onto the street. "A surprise."

Kaylee's laugh fills the car. "How long will it take to get there."

"Depends on traffic."

"Hmm. That's not the best hint."

"What if I tell you something else?"

"If it's something good."

"I got tickets to a show."

"Oh, tell me, Brendon the name dropper. Who are we going to see?"

"Hey, if you don't want backstage passes—"

Her eyes light up. "Really?"

"And I'm the celebrity obsessed one?"

She nods.

"Dangerous Noise."

"What?" Her eyes go wide. Her jaw drops. She stammers something incomprehensible.

Kay is actually speechless.

Fuck, it's adorable.

Slowly, she presses her lips together. Nods. "Really?"

"Yeah."

Her voice jumps higher than I've ever heard it. "Me, you, and Em?"

"If it works for her schedule."

"That's so... Oh my God. I can't even... When?"

"In a few weeks."

She nods. "I just... I need to get tickets to Jersey. So I'll make sure it's not the same dates. You can tell me when I buy them. Tonight, I think."

"You want to talk about it?"

"No. This is good. And we... you... I want to think about happy things for a while."

I want to ask about her Grandma. To know how that's going. To help her work through all the messy shit in her head.

But this is good.

And shit's been hard for Kay.

If she needs a break, I'm more than happy to distract her from every other fucking thing in the world.

"I might have mentioned you to Joel." Or replayed every second of her coming on my hand. Same difference.

"Really?" Her expression gets hazy. Starstruck. "What about me?"

"How much you drive me out of my mind."

"Oh my God."

"He might have stupid shit to say if you go backstage."

"A rock star has stupid shit to say to me. This is..." Her eyes go wide. She's back to speechless.

"Awesome?"

"Yeah." Her chest spills over her tank top as she leans in to turn on the radio.

It's playing a particularly obnoxious pop-rock song.

Kaylee sticks her tongue out. "You... um... Sorry, I'm still on this whole, you're talking about me with rock stars thing."

"He's just as guy."

"A famous guy."

"Even so."

"Ugh, you're so cool. It's obnoxious." Her laugh is nervous. Distracted. "You mind if I plug this in?" She pulls her cell from her pocket and shows it off.

"What you're going to play." I pull onto the main drag. This is going to take forever. I need to be there with her now. I need all of her now. She makes me so fucking greedy.

"Hmm." Her voice is almost all the way back to normal. To mine. She taps the screen a few times. "What would you hate the most?"

"Too many options there."

"True." She plugs the aux cable into her cell. "I'll have mercy."

Rihanna spills from the speaks. S&M.

"You call this mercy?" I stop at a red light, turn to Kay, watch her eyes light up as she smiles.

"It's our song now."

"I'll think of Dean sucking on his index finger every time I hear it."

"I won't." Her voice drops. "I'll think about you..." Her cheeks flush. "I can't say it."

"You can."

"I... No..."

"Sucking the taste of you off my fingers?"

She nods. "How do you make it sound so hot?"

"It was hot." I give her a long once-over. "I'm dying to pin you to the bed, spread your legs, and lick you until you're coming on my face."

A groan falls off her lips. "And that. I want to be able to do that."

"Try it."

"No." She shakes her head. "It's too embarrassing."

"What about it is embarrassing?"

"You're much smarter than that question."

"You picked a song about whips and chains."

"Just wait until the next one."

"Yeah?" The light turns green and I hit the gas.

Kaylee laughs. "I haven't worked this hard at cultivating a playlist since high school."

I don't remind her that high school was four months ago. I don't want to think about the practicalities right now.

There are still a million reasons why this can't happen.

But my heart is hearing none of it.

And my cock—

Fuck, I need to make her come again.

"All sexy stuff." She sets her cell in the cup holder. "If I do say so myself."

"Perfect background for this."

She groans. "I don't like the sound of that."

"You managed it before."

"Yeah, I wasn't even blushing the entire time."

Fuck, she was, and it was adorable. "Tell me what you want to do to me."

"Uh..."

"What you want me to do to you."

She taps her thighs with her fingertips. "I want you to... you're driving, right?"

I chuckle. "Right."

"You have to keep your eyes on the road. And not on me."

"True."

"Okay." Her sigh is heavy with relief. "I want you to—"

She's cut off by the song switching. The sultry beat of Let's Get it On.

"Classic," I say.

"Thanks." Nervousness spills into her voice. "Okay. I can do this." She takes a deep breath. Exhales slowly. "I want you to... to fuck me."

It sounds more like a question than a statement. It's certainly not a demand.

Even so, my body threatens to take over.

Pull over. Find an empty spot. Drag her to the backseat.

"Tomorrow," I say.

Her sigh echoes around the car. "Tomorrow?"

"You want to do it here?" I nod to the backseat of the car.

"Isn't that the classic losing your virginity experience?"

I shrug. "I couldn't drive yet."

"Do you remember that?" She presses her lips together. "The details?"

"It was a long time ago."

"Did you care about her?"

I shake my head. "It was a hook up at a party. Didn't mean anything." It was fun. Scary. Exciting. But not particularly meaningful. I can remember her name and the way she looked at me like I was fresh meat, but everything else is a blur.

"How... um... how long did you last."

"Damn, Kay."

"What?" She blushes. "Isn't that the kind of thing people ask?"

"People, yeah? You?"

"Well? How long?"

"Not long."

"And now?"

I chuckle. "High expectations."

"Well, yeah. You're basically a sex god." She turns toward me. "So... how long?"

"Long enough to get you begging me to stop."

That blush spreads to her chest. "Oh."

"I want to fuck you, Kay. It's driving me out of my fucking mind how badly I want to bury myself in you."

"But..."

"I want to make you wait."