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The Pleasure Series: Complete Box Set by M. S. Parker (106)

Chapter Twenty-Six

I didn't think I had the strength in me, but I somehow managed to find it. I pushed him away. Not that he went far. He merely dropped his hands from my face.

No, there was no merely about it.

His face was blank, guarded.

I had to tell him the truth. “You have to move on.”

“Why?”

The word was clipped, full of something that had never been aimed at me before. Anger.

“You owe me that, Jenna.” He raked his hands through his hair. “You just left. Without a word. Nothing. You didn't talk to me. You just fucked me and then snuck out. Left some vague note. Quit your job. Then you have my friend lie to me and say you two slept together. What the hell is going on?”

He was right. I did owe him.

“You lied to me.” I didn't mean for it to come out as harshly has it had.

His head jerked up, his eyes wide. “What?”

“You told me that it was okay I couldn't have kids,” I whispered. “That it didn't matter. But it does.”

“Jenna–”

“I know, Rylan!” I snapped. I had a choice between anger and anguish. I chose the former. It was easier. “I know that you bought that house for the family you thought you'd have with Lara. You might've changed who you thought you'd marry, but the fact that you've kept that house all these years says that you haven't given up on having a family.” I forced myself to look at him. “You deserve to be with someone who can give you what you want.”

He came back over to the bed, his expression incredulous. “How can you not know?” He reached out and brushed hair away from my face. “You're what I want.”

“A family.” My eyes were burning. “You want a family.”

“Yes, Jenna, I want a family, but family isn't defined by DNA.”

My heart leaped and I tried to quash the hope that flared inside me. I couldn't hope or believe, because when I lost it again...I didn't think I could survive it.

“I don't care about the biology of it. We have options.” He took a slow breath. “And if you don't want children, that's okay too. Because as long as I have you, I have family. You're my family.”

I started to shake my head, then stopped. The medicine had done its job taking away most of the pain, but I was still a bit light-headed. “There are plenty of beautiful women out there who'd love to be your family.” I hadn't thought it was possible to hurt any more than I had before. “Women like Emmaline.”

“Emmaline?”

He sounded so surprised that I risked a glance. “She said you'd been seeing each other. And Suzette told me you'd been out with other women.”

“Friends of Suzette's,” he interrupted. “Women I took out on dates to keep my sister from bugging the hell out of me.”

My fingers twitched.

“And I took Emmaline out on Valentine's Day because I felt bad that she was alone.” He tried to make his tone light. “It wasn't like I had any other plans.”

“It doesn't matter,” I said. “You need to...mmmf.”

Whatever I was going to say was lost as Rylan covered my mouth with his. This was nothing like his previous kiss. This was passion and heat, a desire so fierce that if I'd had any breath left, it would've taken it away. Everything I'd been dealing with, everything I'd been feeling; it was all coming from him. His arms wrapped around me, crushing me to his chest. The scent of him made my chest tighten and I reached up to pull him closer.

I'd forgotten about my hand.

I groaned in pain and he immediately pulled back.

“I'm sorry, love. I didn't mean...”

“It's okay.” I gave him a soft smile despite the sudden flash of heartache. “I'm not holding you to anything.”

“You think I'm apologizing for kissing you?” He stared at me. “Dammit, Jenna, I thought you were smart.”

I blinked in surprise.

“The only time I was ever sorry for kissing you was that first time,” he said firmly. “And only because of how much it scared you.” He gripped my chin between his thumb and fingers. His voice was harsh. “I have never regretted one kiss, one touch, one moment with you. I've been through hell since you left me, but I would go through it all again for one more second.”

“Rylan.” My voice cracked. I tried to look away, but he kept his grip firm.

“Tell me,” he demanded. “Tell me you haven't missed me, that you haven't been miserable virtually every single minute we've been apart. Tell me that your body isn't burning right now, aching for me. Tell me that and I'll walk away. You'll never have to see me again.”

I couldn't do it. I couldn't lie. Not with him staring at me like that, not when I heard the sincerity in his voice.

“I can't.” I took a shuddering breath. “I can't say it because it isn't true.”

His body sagged in relief and he rested his forehead against mine. “Oh, love. You don't know how scared I was.”

“Scared?” I rested my injured hand on his shoulder and clutched the back of his neck with the other. I didn't understand. Rylan was the strongest man I knew. “What could you possibly be scared of?”

He laughed and there were tears in the sound. “Losing you. You're everything to me, Jenna. I love my family and my friends. I can exist for them, but I can only live for you. I don't want anyone else.”

“I don't either.” As I said the words, it was like I could breathe again. My heart beat in my chest, whole once again.

When the doctor came back in, Rylan and I were sitting next to each other on the bed, his arms around me, my head on his shoulder. I'd finished telling him everything that had happened and I was ready to go, but I didn't know my destination. Rylan's arms were strong and solid around me, his words fresh in my ears, but I still doubted. I'd hurt him. Badly. I didn't know where things stood with him, and I didn't want to risk this, not yet.

“Miss Lang.” Dr. Howard sounded amused.

Rylan sat up, his face flushing. He stood and held out his hand. “Rylan Archer.”

“Mr. Archer.” The doctor shook Rylan's hand, the expression on his face saying he'd recognized Rylan's name. “I'm assuming you're this young lady's ride home?”

I swallowed hard and looked down at my hand. Home. My apartment was safe again now that Christophe was dead.

“I am.” He reached down and took my hand. “Is she okay to leave?”

The doctor started to hand me a small pill bottle, then smiled when he saw that my good hand was otherwise occupied. He handed it to Rylan and then a piece of paper. “Here’s a sample. Those pills should get her through today, but you'll want to get the prescription filled.” Dr. Howard looked down at me. “Keep your hand dry and at least partially elevated. You'll want to make an appointment with your usual doctor and set things up to have those stitches removed in a few weeks.”

“And my fingers?” I asked. I wasn't sure I wanted to hear the answer.

“It depends,” Dr. Howard said. “The X-rays appeared to show clean breaks, but I'm a little concerned about the way they were broken. You said they were...twisted?”

Rylan's hand tightened around mine.

I nodded.

“I'm going to refer you to a specialist,” Dr. Howard said. “I'm almost positive that they'll heal fine, but I'd rather not take any chances.”

“Thank you,” I said. “Is there anything else?”

“Not unless you have questions for me.” He held out his clipboard, then hesitated. “I didn't think to ask if you were left-handed.”

I shook my head as Rylan released my hand. A rush of heat went through me as he rested his hand on my thigh. I didn't ask him to move it though. I quickly signed the papers and handed them back.

It wasn't until the doctor walked out that something hit me. “Shit,” I said. “My clothes...”

“I was in a bit of a rush,” Rylan interrupted. He had the same sheepish look on his face that he'd had when he'd shown me how he'd decorated the house for Christmas. Like he'd done something and wasn't entirely sure how I was going to respond. “But I brought you something.” He picked up a bag that I hadn't seen him bring in.

I smiled when I saw what was inside. A pair of his shorts and a t-shirt. Both way too big for me and exactly what I wanted to wear. Even if I was just going back to my apartment, at least I'd be able to have the scent of him around me when I fell asleep.

I changed quickly and reluctantly accepted the wheelchair. I didn't ask the question until we were in the car and heading away from the hospital.

“Where are you taking me?”

He looked over at me, startled. “Home. Unless...” His expression tightened. “I can take you back to your apartment if that's what you want.”

“I didn't want to assume...” The sentence trailed off.

“Do you love me?”

Now it was my turn to be surprised. “Yes.”

“Are you going to leave me again?”

My heart twisted painfully at the thought. “Not unless you want me to go.”

“Then it's settled,” he said matter-of-factly. “I'm taking you home.”

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