I struggle not to laugh as I sit on the couch and watch Niko try to teach Corey how to do a one handed press up. Since getting the heads up about the email, we’ve been trying to show Corey how to look after himself, discretely of course. Niko and I also decided that it would be best if Corey didn’t know we were being watched. There’s no point in worrying him when there’s no chance that anyone will get near him. Not with Niko, Clay and me always on alert. Clay stationed himself in a small clearing just North of the cabin, using the small shelter that we made to keep him covered. He hasn’t complained about being there for hours at a time, but you can see the tension start to build in him whenever he comes in to update us. He doesn’t come to the cabin often, but I think sometimes he just needs to decompress with Niko. I have a feeling that if Clay were to find the guy doing this, there would be no remains left to identify.

It’s been a stressful two weeks for everyone. The waiting has been harder than I thought it would be, but thankfully Corey is oblivious and happy. I didn’t want to keep anything from Corey, thinking that he can protect himself better if he knows the danger, but Niko put forward a very in-depth argument. By in-depth I mean that he pinned me to a wall and kissed the fuck out of me until I agreed to his plan. I smile at the memory of that kiss, and every kiss since, and I push down on my cock that’s pushing against the front of my jeans. Shit, just remembering some of the things we’ve done together is enough to make my balls pull up into my body. I was convinced that our one night of passion together would be the only time I got to be with these good-looking men. I couldn’t have been more wrong.

“You’re cheating.”

I turn to see Corey slapping Niko on the stomach. It’s not particularly hard, but with all Niko’s muscles, I can hear the contact clearly. It takes me back to a few nights ago when Niko had decided that Corey had needed to be spanked and that I was the one who should do it. The feel of his skin vibrating under my palm was the best sort of temptation. I didn’t stop until his arse cheeks were red and he was begging for me to take him.

I close my eyes and try to think of anything other than the things that we’ve done, but it’s difficult. The memories are burned deep into my brain, and they won’t leave me anytime soon. We haven’t discussed what this is between us, but I'm willing to smile and go along for the ride. This, whatever it is, has an expiry date that looms closer every day that passes, but I’m willing to endure the pain when it ends to just be with them both now.

I didn’t ever imagine that being with two men would be so easy, so simple, but this feels like the most natural thing in the world. I don’t know what its like to be in a real relationship, especially since being with Ted was nothing like a relationship, but I’ve always imagined it would be hard work. Shouldn’t it feel like constant work to keep other people happy? All I know that being with these guys is fun, and not just in the bedroom. It’s like anything we do whether it’s watching a film or helping Corey bake, it’s just enjoyable. It’s a comfortable companionship that I haven’t felt since my friendship with Drake, only this time there’s the bonus of really fucking hot sex.

“Grant!”

I turn to face Corey, thankful that he pulled me out of the rabbit hole of my brain.

“Tell Niko that he isn’t allowed to tickle me when I'm trying to win.”

I smirk at Corey’s little pout. It really shouldn’t work on a grown man, and it probably shouldn’t make him look sexy, but it does. The way his bottom lip pops out makes me want to take it into my mouth and suck it. “Love and war, baby. Love and war.”

Corey gives me the finger before turning towards a laughing Niko. “Both of you suck.”

Niko grabs Corey by the arm and drags him against his body. I lick my lips because going by the look in Niko’s eyes this is about to get good. I’ve discovered a lot about myself over the last few weeks, but the most surprising thing is I'm a watcher. Seeing Niko and Corey together gives me just as much pleasure as being involved. Niko manoeuvres himself so that Corey’s back is pressed against his chest and Corey is facing me. “Yeah, baby, we both suck. But only if you’re a really good boy.”

I sit forward as Niko starts grinding against Corey’s arse, the invitation obvious. I keep watching Corey as I get to my knees and crawl across the floor towards him. I see his chest rising and falling quickly as I close the distance between us. I flash my eyes over to Niko, and the look in his eyes isn’t the one I expect. There is a little heat, but the most prominent thing is mischief. I try to keep my face neutral, but I'm as confused as hell. When Niko winks at me, the whole thing falls into place. What we are about to do might get us hurt, but it will be completely worth it.

As soon as I’m in front of Corey, I get up on my knees, making sure I move as slowly and seductively as I can.

“Tell him what you want, Core.”

I'm struggling not to laugh at Niko, but shit, the guy is convincing. “I know what he wants, Niko. He doesn’t need to tell me.”

Corey’s nostrils flare as his breathing quickens. Yeah, there’s a good chance he's about to lose his shit. I reach out and run my hands over his waist as Niko lifts his arms and pins them behind him. Corey’s in the perfect position now, entirely at our mercy, just not for what he's expecting. As soon as I get to his side, I dig my fingers into his muscles, tickling him.

He screams as soon as he realises what’s happening and I have to struggle to keep contact with his wriggling body. He might not have the same body mass as Niko or me, but you tickle Corey, and he turns into a crazy guy. Niko’s laughter makes me double my efforts, but I know that I need to run soon. Corey will find a way to escape, so I need to get the fuck out of here before he does. If one thing is a certainty, it’s that when Corey escapes, he will hurt me.

“Fucking stop. Grant, I will kill you. Shit … Niko. I swear I’ll hurt you.” As soon as he stops shouting at me a hand grabs my hair and forces my head back. I'm left looking at a very pissed-off Corey, and as his grip on my hair tightens I know that it’s time to get out of here.

“Sorry, I held him as long as I could.” Niko can’t hide the laughter in his voice as I struggle to get Corey’s hand out of my hair. Niko’s arms are still around Corey’s waist, but that won’t keep him still for long. Shit, I can’t run until he lets go, and his glare is scaring me. I’m in a precarious position on my knees, one that Corey will take full advantage of if he can.

“Just keep holding him.” Yeah, there’s a little panic in my voice, but there’s a good reason. The last time Niko pinned Corey down and tickled him he ended up with a bloody nose. Yeah, our sweet little Corey can make you bleed when he's pushed.

I finally get free of his hands, and I back up, getting to my feet as quickly as possible. I see Corey fighting with Niko to get free, but his eyes are firmly on me. Time to go. I spin and race towards the hall.

“I will get you, fucker. It’s better if you don’t run.”

I'm laughing as I turn the corner towards the front door. The laughter dies on my lips instantly, and I come to a complete stop, my eyes widen as panic immediately spikes. I want to run back to the living room, but the gun pointing at my head has me freezing to the spot. My only thought is making sure that Niko and Corey are safe.

“Hands up.” I do what he says while I finally take my eyes off the gun and look at the person who’s holding it. He has dark hair with eyes to match, and a body that isn’t huge but the power is evident. If you saw this guy on the street, you wouldn’t feel intimidated, but this close you can feel the power oozing from every pore. He’s dangerous and would be even without the gun he's pointing at me.

“Grant?” I put a hand out to try and keep Corey away from this guy, keep him calm, so he doesn’t do anything stupid. What I get is the complete opposite and the next few minutes rush by in a flash as my whole world implodes.

When people talk about knowing the exact moment that everything changed, that pivotal moment in their life, I always thought they were being dramatic. I thought there’s no way that they could pinpoint a moment in time that changed their life. I was wrong. I can see that now. Because no matter what happens in the future I know this is when the world collapsed around me.

“Grant?” A very different voice says my name this time, and even though I should be happy to hear it, I just want him to vanish. The guy in front of me doesn’t move a muscle, but I see a little of his tension seep from his body as a hand lands on his arm. When the owner of the arm appears beside the guy with a confused look on his face, I feel everything click into place.

“Holy shit, Grant?” Drake is looking at me with shock and confusion, and really who could blame him? If it had just been the two of us, I would rush over and hug him, but the only thing I can think is the guy, who I'm now pretty sure is Ryden, still hasn’t lowered his gun and Corey hasn’t said anything.

I keep staring at the gun and Drake finally registers that it’s still pointing at me. He pushes Ryden’s arm until he lowers it but I notice that he doesn’t put it away. “Ryden, for the love of god put that away.” On his next breath, Drake has his arms around me, hugging me tightly. I take a moment to close my eyes and enjoy the feeling of finally being reunited with my best friend. I haven’t seen him for nearly a year, and even that was a brief moment in the middle of a tactical operation. I wanted to find him, but I think there was always part of me that didn’t believe I actually would.

He pulls back and grips me by the shoulders. “What are you doing here?”

I haven’t managed to get my mouth to work since I ran into the hall and I'm not sure how to speak anymore. How do I explain everything to him when I haven’t told the truth to Corey?

There’s a noise to the side of me, and I see Drakes' eyes widen as when he looks. I turn slowly, not wanting to see what’s happening but knowing I need to. The vision I'm met with mimics what happened a few minutes ago with Ryden. I'm frozen to the spot but not because I'm afraid because this time I'm not scared. No, this time I'm heartbroken even though I know why it’s happening.

Corey stands in front of me, the gun that Ryden had in his hand now in his, now pointing directly at me. His hand is shaking, and he looks a second away from losing control. “Who are you?”

“Grant Morrison.”

He shakes the gun at me, his anger clear on his face. “Stop it! Who are you, and don’t fucking lie to me.”

“My name is Grant Morrison. I swear I'm not lying.” I keep my voice as even and gentle as possible, hoping that he will let me explain.

“How do you know Drake?”

“We used to work together. Before I came here, I worked for the police.”

Corey’s eyes widen. “You're a policeman? Shit, why are you here?”

Niko slowly walks behind Corey, his hand gripping onto his shoulder. “Core, let’s all calm down.”

“No, Niko. I brought him in here, and he's the fucking police. He’s probably after you, and I won’t let him take you.”

Shit. This can’t be happening. “Core, that’s not it. I’m not here because of the police. And it’s my old job. I quit after Drake vanished and they wouldn’t investigate it. I promise you. I’m here because I want to be, nothing more.”

“That’s not what brought you to the door. You must have been watching us. You didn’t just happen upon us. Fuck, did you fake everything?” He sounds more upset than angry now. “Oh god, how could I be so stupid?”

I'm struggling to swallow the lump in my throat at seeing Corey so broken. I need him to understand that he’s important to me, but I just stand and stare at him because I can’t get the words I need. My world is collapsing around me, and I'm standing here like a fucking idiot just watching it happen.

Niko takes the gun from his hand with ease, and that worries me. An angry Corey I could deal with, but one that’s in pain is too much.

“Leave.”

I didn’t realise that one word could cause such an ache like this, but as Corey says it, I feel my heart being ripped out of my chest. I look to Niko but he won’t meet my eyes, and it’s clear he isn’t sure how to proceed with this situation. He must feel torn between my lies and his part in them, and the pain that I'm causing the man he loves.

“Corey, please don’t do this.” The burning of tears starts as I watch hurt passing over Corey’s face. It’s in this moment that I know the full truth is finally hitting him.

“I'm not doing this, Grant. You did this, all of this is you. The first time you lied to Niko and me, that’s when you did this.”

I try to move, to go to Corey and beg him to listen to me, but Niko puts his hand on my chest and holds me against the wall behind me.

“Baby, please.”

I try to go to Corey again, but his glare stops my fight instantly. A sob escapes him, and I feel my heart shatter into tiny little pieces at the sound. “Don’t call me that, you don’t have the right anymore.”

I watch in silent horror as Corey walks away from me. The hall has gone quiet and the only thing keeping me standing is Niko’s hold on my chest. All too soon he leaves me, and I mourn the loss of his touch.

“I’ll talk to him, make him understand.” He turns to look at Ryden and Drake. “I’ll be back soon.” He drops his head and silently heads in the direction of his bedroom. He looks more defeated than I’ve ever seen him and my heart breaks all over again.

I slide down the wall until I'm sitting on the ground. I should leave like Corey told me but I just can’t seem to build up the energy to move. Dropping my head to my knees, I tangle my fingers in my hair and try to will away my tears. If I’d just told Corey who I was I know he would have listened, he’d have listened and given me a chance to explain everything. He would have believed me. Now he just sees me as a threat to him and Niko, and I'm the last person he should be worried about.

Someone brushes against my arm, and I look up to find Drake sitting next to me. I look to where Ryden had been, but it’s just me and Drake left in the hallway. “I know it won’t mean much now, but I'm thrilled to see you.”

I let out a humourless laugh and drop my head back against the wall. “You are the reason I'm here, so yeah, I'm glad to see you too.”

“Me?” Drake honestly sounds surprised at my revelation, and it makes me feel like a shitty friend. How could he spend all that time with me and not realise how important he was to me.

“Yeah, you idiot. Did you really think I would just let you vanish without making sure you were safe?”

“Oh.”

We sit in silence for a few minutes, and I know I should say something. I spent all this time looking for him to apologise, so that’s probably a good place to start. “I'm sorry.”

“What? You have nothing -”

I take his hand in mine and interrupt him. “I need you to stop talking and just listen.” I tilt my head towards him, and he nods. “I was a terrible friend. I let you go through so much on your own when I could have been there to back you up and support you. It wasn’t until you were gone that I realised you were my best friend. I said it a lot, but suddenly you were gone, and I felt it.”

He grips my hand tighter but stays quiet like I asked. What I say next could change everything between us.

“I'm gay, Drake.” I wait for a gasp of surprise or shout of frustration, but there’s nothing. “You can say something now.”

“I already know.”

I sit up and stare at him, wondering how the fuck he already knows. “What?”

“Even if I didn’t know before today, I think it’s obvious now. But I think I've always known.”

A tug of pain grips my body because I kept this from him. He was a good enough friend to notice something important without being told, and I couldn’t even be honest to stop him being bullied alone. “How?”

“Gaydar? I don’t know. I just knew.”

“Fuck.” I drop my head back against the wall because looking at him has become difficult. “I made you go through all that shit alone. I could have helped.”

“You did. You coming out wouldn’t have lessened the abuse, but being there for me at night when it all got too much, that’s how you helped. You were the best friend anyone could have asked for.”

Everything he says just makes me feel worse because there is no way he means what he's saying. Even now he is trying to make me feel better when it’s taken me this long to realise how important he is to me. “You’re lying, but today I appreciate it.”

“Does that mean I get to ask a question or two now?”

As much as I just want to sit here and stew in my misery, Drake probably deserves a few answers. “Shoot.”

“How did you get here with Corey and Niko? Do you know who they are?”

“Yeah, I know. I linked Corey with Blue Diamond and came looking for him. It was pure luck that I found him, and I didn’t know who Niko was, still don’t really. All I know is that he was hired muscle for Ryden.” It’s so strange talking about them like this because since being here I’ve all but forgotten who they used to be. Their pasts don’t define them, so I just don’t think about it.

“You know who Corey used to be, what he was?”

My stomach clenches when Drake mentions what Corey used to do and I have a sudden urge to find Ryden so I can beat him into the ground. He's the person who sold Corey for profit, and it’s confusing that Niko and Corey are fine around him. “I know that your boyfriend used to sell him to the highest bidder. Fuck, even thinking about it makes me want to throw up. Did he make you have sex with other men?” The last question comes out quietly, but I can’t seem to voice it louder.

“No, he never sold me. I've been his from the minute I was taken by his men.”

“How can you be with someone who did that to all those others?”

Drake looks down to the ground, his fingers picking at some imaginary speck of dirt on his jeans. “It’s amazing what you can overlook when you fall in love. Their past doesn’t always define who they are.”

I want to be angry with Drake and shout that he’s lost his mind, but I find myself relating to him. I know there must be a lot of blood in Niko’s past that, as a policeman, I shouldn’t be okay with, but I know that no matter what he told me I would forgive him. Just the same as I would never judge Corey for everything he did to survive. So no, I can’t be angry with Drake because I know exactly how he feels.