“Knock, knock,” I hear Reanell call as she opens my door.

“What’s up, my love?” I ask, my voice radiating with delight.

“You’re awful perky this morning,” she looks at me skeptically.

I’m starting a new outlook from this day forward. I can continue to be sad and mopey or I can remember Aaron as the man he was. The husband, sailor, and hero, not the martyr I’ve made him. I go back to work in a few weeks, I have a great support system. It’s time to start taking baby steps.

“Well, who wouldn’t smile at your beautiful face?” I ask sweetly.

“Could it be the sex-on-a-stick outside shirtless fixing the shed?” She looks out the window as she moans. “God, men like him aren’t real. They’re sent to toy with us.”

Looking behind her, I suppress a groan. She’ll take that as something it’s not. But seriously, holy shit. His back is taut and the muscles ripple as he lifts the two-by-four and then nails it into place. His arms flex and I gawk. He wipes his brow as the sweat trickles down his face and I fight the urge to keep looking. I turn my head but my eyes stay glued to him.

Reanell clears her throat and stares at me with her brow raised. “Well, well, well. What do we have here?”

“Nothing. What?” I pretend to sound confused at what she saw.

“Right. Nothing at all.”

“Nope. Nothing to see here.”

She looks back out the window. “There’s plenty to see my friend. Plenty indeed.”

I need to flip the attention. “Did anyone ever tell you you’re a horny housewife who needs a job?”

“A few times. Mason appreciates that I can shop without buying.”

I laugh and slap her arm. “Yeah, it’s about the only thing you don’t buy.”

She looks away and snorts. “Accurate. I’m also not buying your diversion. I saw you eating him alive.”

“No, I’m not even ready to go there. Let’s change the subject, okay?”

“No, not until you admit he’s hot.”

“Why does it matter if I think he’s hot?” I scoff.

Rea smiles and puts her hands on her hips. “Admit it.”

“Fine, I won’t deny it. He’s hot.”

“I knew you thought so,” she smirks.

I roll my eyes and smother the desire to choke her.

“Besides, if you did deny it, I would be worried,” she laughs. “How about while Aarabelle’s sleeping, we can do some stuff around here?”

I look at the mantel and my heart falters. I can feel him everywhere and I’m not ready to lose that. Already I’ve lost so much. Just pulling into my drive without his car there will be one more reminder. Loss and anger are at war in me. I’m mad at everyone and everything, but then I have to go on day by day. I don’t get to sulk and be sad because there’s a tiny baby that we made together. I close my eyes and think of him.

“Sure,” the word falls out.

We spend the next few hours cleaning papers and things around the house. I’m sweating and huffing from carrying all the boxes up and down the stairs. It’s been a long day and I look like hell but feel a little lighter. We’ve got things organized, and as much as I want to stop, I also want to keep going. I worry the strength I’ve harnessed will be lost tomorrow.

Before I can tell Rea my plan to keep on, she looks over and frowns. “I need to get home. Mason wants dinner early and I want a new purse.”

She’s a mess. “How do those go hand in hand?”

“He likes to eat. I like Michael Kors. If I don’t get a bag, he can starve,” she winks and grabs her purse.

“Sounds perfectly reasonable,” I reply with a huff. “I’m going to finish up. Thank you for today.”

Reanell kisses my cheek. “I’m proud of you. I know this isn’t easy, but it was time.”

“Thanks, you know that it’s been seven months today?”

“Since he died?”

“Yeah, crazy, right? Aarabelle is so small to me that I forget.”

Reanell sits on the couch with her purse in her arms. “I think we all do. You were pregnant when he died and then Aara kind of shifted time. It’s a good thing though. She’s given you a way to keep moving.”

“Maybe.”

“And Liam being around making you do stuff helps too, no?”

I think about what she says and try to come up with an argument. But it’s true. Liam has forced me to handle everything in the last few weeks. In a short amount of time he’s taken care of months’ worth of things.

“He’s helped a lot.”

“I better bounce, but I’m glad you’re doing well. You look better too.”

“Thanks, I think.”

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” she winks.

I nod and she leaves. Aarabelle is taking her afternoon nap in her playpen. She ate and played for a little and now I have about an hour before she’ll need to eat again. I decide to hang the curtains in the living room that have been sitting in the closet for months.

Getting all my tools out, I grab the ladder and mark the spots where the new rod will go. I can do this. Take that, Martha Stewart. Once everything is up, I get the screw and it won’t go in. I try again and the screw falls and I fumble with the drill. “Damn it,” I curse as it falls to the floor. Grabbing the drill, I hear a laugh behind me. “Am I amusing you, Dreamboat?” I ask as I try to align the screw. I know using his call sign pisses him off…which is why I said it. Aaron used to lose his shit when I called him Papa Smurf.

“I think you want to wound me.”

“Never. I’m just…” I struggle with the stupid screw that refuses to go in. “Stupid damn drill is broken!”

“You have it set to reverse,” Liam says chuckling and he climbs the ladder behind me.

“Get down!” I yell as his weight makes the ladder tilt a little.

“Push that button there,” he says against my neck. “You’re not going to fall. I’ll be the one who breaks their neck.”

I suppress a shiver as he lifts my hand and pushes the back of the drill. “Fine, maybe I’ll elbow you,” I joke to try to keep my mind off how his body is pressed against mine. The body that I stared and marveled at. He’s only helping, Natalie.

“I’ll take you with me. Now, push hard and screw.”

I lose my grip on the drill. “That sounded so bad!” My head falls forward and we both laugh hysterically. “Oh,” I say as my stomach hurts.

“You made it dirty!”

“You told me to push hard and screw,” and I start laughing again.

Liam rests against me and we both try to control our breathing. “Okay,” he breathes again. “Now, make sure it’s aligned in the hole.”

“Oh, God. Get down. I can’t do this.” I giggle and snort.

“You snorted!” he says as he grips my hips and helps me off the ladder.

“You made me,” I reply incredulously.

“Well, put it in the hole and screw.”

“Stop!” I hold on to the ladder as tears fall from laughing so hard.

Liam keeps going. “If you don’t know how to put it in, I can help.”

We both laugh and I hear Aarabelle cry.

“Now you’ve done it,” my voice is full of humor.

Liam grabs the drill, “You get Aara, I’ll make sure you don’t have to re-plaster the walls.”

I clutch my chest and reply dramatically, “Oh, my hero.”

He gives a mock salute with the drill and I leave him to his power tools. Maybe he really is a miracle worker.

After a little while, Liam has all the curtains hung and a few pictures I found during my cleaning. Aarabelle plays happily in her swing.

“A little to the left,” I instruct Liam as he tries to align the photo.

“Here?”

“Ummm, maybe to the right? But just a smidge.” I laugh to myself as his head drops, clearly frustrated.

“Lee, I’m going to nail this to the ground if you make me move it again,” Liam grumbles as he moves it back to where it was originally.

I take a step back and try to keep from laughing because this is actually fun. “You know,” I muse. “I think maybe I should put it in the hall.” I bite my lip to keep from busting out.

He groans and puts the photo down. I hear him take a few deep breaths. When he turns, I bat my eyes innocently. “I’m going to let this sit here for a minute.”

“Oh, but I want to hang it.” I giggle and Liam bursts out with a loud guffaw.

“You’re a giant pain in the ass.”

“Yeah, but where else would you go for abuse?” I simper and shrug.

“Work.”

“True. I mean, they probably won’t call you fat or old…yeah, right, they totally will,” I tease, reminding him of our previous discussion.

“Take it back.”

I raise my brow. “Never.”

“Do you really want to brawl?”

“You’ll lose. I was trained.”

He breaks out into a run straight for me and I sprint toward the kitchen laughing. He’s going to kill me, but I can’t back down. I lean against the door hoping I can keep him from coming in.

“Why are you running, oh trained one?” he asks from the other side of the kitchen door.

Shit. I’m trapped.