Chapter Eleven

Luke

When I walked Ruby to her door, a sudden nervousness fell over me. I wasn’t worried about kissing her goodnight. That was a given. No, it was something else. A deep worry that kept pulling at my gut.

Where was this going?

“Listen, Ruby,” I began as I scrambled to figure out what I was going to say.

She looked back up at me with a soft smile and waited.

“On Monday, I was wondering …”

Her smile dropped as she held out a hand to touch my shoulder. “Don’t worry about it, Luke. I promise, I won’t go around telling everyone that you couldn’t keep your hands off of me.”

I laughed and shook my head. “I don’t worry about that. No, I was wondering if I could give you a ride to school. I know you don’t like being helped. But, it’s not that big a deal.”

She looked at me strangely for a long moment then said, “You mean sort of like a boyfriend or something?”

I shrugged my shoulders as my stomach tumbled over and over.

A sad thought passed behind her eyes. I swallowed hard as I prepared myself to be shafted.

“You know, I don’t really do the whole boyfriend-girlfriend thing,” she said as kindly as possible. “I never have.”

Okay, at least she was trying to be sweet about it. Trying to blame it on herself instead of laying it on me.

“How about as friends with kissing privileges?” I said, determined to make it light and easy. No way was I going to make this worse than it was.

She laughed, obviously relieved that I was able to joke about it. “That isn’t much different than the whole boyfriend-girlfriend thing if you ask me.”

“No, but this way you can maintain the whole Ruby Miller rule about never caring or getting involved. Maintain that famous mystique.”

She smiled, “And what do you get?” she asked.

“You,” I said before I could stop myself.

The smile dropped from her face. “You’re serious,” she said as if she was having a hard time believing me. “You want me to be your girlfriend?”

“Well, yes, I guess I do.”

The thick silence surrounding us threatened to smother me. I hadn’t realized how important this was. But it was something I couldn’t have avoided for anything. I had to know.

“Luke,” she said with a serious frown. “We are from two different worlds. We …”

“Ruby, we go to the same school. We grew up in the same town.”

“That doesn’t matter. We’re still from different worlds. You live in happy town where everything is perfect. I’ve never known anyone I could really trust. Believe me, it is different. You won’t tell your parents you want to be an artist because you won’t hurt them. I can’t even talk to my mother and could care less what happens to her. We are different.”

Her words carved out a piece of my soul. But I couldn’t let it go.

“We’re not that different,” I said.

Ruby snorted and shook her head, “You’re straight ‘A’s, glasses, helping people. It’s doubtful I’ll even graduate, I’m piercings and being tough. Believe me, different worlds.”

I studied her for a long moment until a flash of understanding filled me. Ruby Miller was terrified of being loved.

Suddenly the world made sense, Smiling I pulled her into a deep hug and whispered, “I love you, Ruby, even if you don’t want me to. I’m always going to love you.”

She stiffened in my arms like a young doe ready to bolt. I held her softly, letting her know I was going to be there no matter what.

Ruby held very still for a long moment until she finally relented and melted into me. My heart soared, Yes!!!

She pulled back to look up into my eyes. “You know, things between us aren’t always going to be happy and covered in pixy dust. I just know it. Somewhere along the way. Things will get all prickly between us.”

I scowled down at her as I tried to understand what she was getting at.

So of course, she made me wait as her eyes studied mine.

Finally, after holding my breath for an eternity, she smiled and slowly nodded. “Okay, Luke Sinclair, we’ll try it. After all. A girl should try everything at least once.”

I laughed as I felt my world rush back into reality. Leaning forward, I closed my eyes as I prepared to give her the best kiss of her life, when I felt her hand on my chest holding me back.

“Just remember,” she said with a sad smile. “If I screw it up. It wasn’t personal.”

A quick laugh escaped before I could stop it.

Pulling her in close I wrapped my arms around her and said, “Okay, I won't take it personally.”

She sank into me and we stood there for several minutes, just being together. Just holding onto each other and keeping the world away.

Finally, she leaned back, then kissed me quickly and looked up into my eyes. If I didn’t know better, I would have sworn I could see a glistening tear in the corner of her eye. But that would be impossible. Ruby Miller did not cry.

I knew one thing for sure. I would spend the rest of my life making sure that Ruby Miller never cried again.