Chapter 4
Chase
Mateo ignores my hand and tugs at his robe so it’s covering his junk. “Why do you care?”
“Well, I can’t just watch you give in to the darkness.” I lean against the railing beside Mateo, close enough to grab him if he falls without my presence being overwhelming. “I’ve been where you’re at, and I know it’s hard. But you have to fight it.”
“I appreciate what you’re saying…but there’s no reason to anymore,” he says quietly as a single tear slips down his cheek. “I have no where left to go.”
“I’ve got friends.” I shift my weight so I’m facing Mateo. “I can make arrangements for you to see someone who specializes in depression.”
Mateo laughs without any humor. “I’m not depressed. I’ve finally got my head on straight.”
“And your head is telling you to jump?” Now I’m getting pissed. “You’ve got your whole damn life ahead of you. Just because things aren’t exactly the way you want them right now doesn’t mean they won’t be in a week or a year or ten years.”
He narrows his eyes and looks me up and down. “Like yours? You’ve got a great life, and if I just wait long enough, I’ll have one too?”
I smirk at the irony of my advice when I’m just as fucking lost as this kid is. “No, not like mine. Way the hell better than mine.”
He actually smiles. “Thanks, but I’m fine. You can go back and tell Johnny you gave the ol’ college try and it worked.” He climbs back over the railing and starts walking toward the end of the bridge. “Good talk.”
I roll my eyes and follow him. “Do you think I’m an idiot?”
He glances at me as he picks up his bike. “No, actually, you seem like a pretty smart guy. So I’m telling you right now that you don’t want to waste your time any more than I want you to.”
Fuck. I’m gonna regret this. “Come home with me.”
He belts out a laugh and throws his leg over the seat. “I don’t know what Johnny told you, but I’m not good at that anymore. But I’m sure he’ll be able to find someone to take care of you.”
“No, wait.” I jog after him and reach for his arm. Even with the thin layer of cotton shielding his skin, the shiver that runs through him is obvious. “Just for tonight. You can stay in my guest room.”
“That’s not necessary. You’ve done your duty…”
“Please.” I give his arm a gentle squeeze. “I won’t be able to sleep tonight if I know you’re wandering bridges.” I smile to soften my words. “Please.”
His eyes travel between my hand and my eyes. “Really?”
“Really.”
He swallows hard and looks straight ahead. “Whatever. Can we go now?”
“Mateo...”
“What? I said fine. Let’s just go before I change my mind.”
I smile then look at Mateo in the robe which barely covers his exposed body. “I’ve got some extra gym clothes in my bag. Let me get them for you so you’ll have something to wear.”
“Gross, I don’t want to wear your smelly gym clothes.”
I can’t help but laugh at his indignity at the suggestion. “They’re clean. And you can’t ride around in a robe.”
“Why not?” he asks sarcastically.
“Because, you’ll get pulled over for indecent exposure...”
“So now you’re worried about my rap sheet?”
“Wouldn’t you rather avoid any new drama in your life at this moment?” I raise an eyebrow.
He stares at me for a fifteen seconds, a mixture of anger and relief fighting for dominance in his eyes. Assuming that’s a yes, I unlock the trunk of my car and pull out my gym bag. I always carry workout clothes with me in case I want to go for a run after work. After digging out some clothes and sneakers, I close up my car and walk back to him.
“Here. They probably won’t fit, but at least they’ll keep you covered until we get to my place.”
He takes the clothes from me and grumbles as he gets off the bike. I avert my eyes, even though I’ve already seen him completely naked, while he slips off the robe and puts on my clothes. They’re a bit baggy, but the shoes seem to fit perfectly so at least he won’t be tripping over them.
When I hear him get back on his bike, I turn back around. “Do you want to just follow me?”
“Not really,” he says under his breath before turning back to me. “But, whatever. Lead the way.” Mateo starts the engine while I get in my car. True to his word, he follows me off the bridge and back toward the city. I keep a close eye on my rearview mirror, hoping he doesn’t try to ditch me and head somewhere else. He could do it if he wants to, but he sticks with me. I take that as an encouraging sign. Maybe some of what I said is getting through to him.
My four-bedroom home is on the outskirts of town in a quiet neighborhood. I don’t use most of the house, but I fell in love with the infinity pool and jacuzzi tub in the back yard that overlooks some open space. It’s a great place to entertain, if I ever did any entertaining. But I don’t. In fact, other than the housecleaner, I haven’t had anyone over to visit in years.
I try to stay busy with school and my research to avoid being home too often...alone in this big house. When we pull up to the driveway, Mateo just stares at the exterior of the place.
“You live here?”
“Yeah,” I say, trying to casually brush off his awe. I don’t consider myself to be wealthy or even to have the nicest place around, but looking through Mateo’s eyes, I can see how good I have it compared to some.
He looks around the circular drive for another car. “Is your family away or something?”
“No... No family. It’s just me.”
I walk him through the front door that opens into a large foyer. “You live in this place by yourself?”
I laugh but it’s actually more sad than funny. “Yes. That’s what just me means.”
He shakes his head in disbelief and that annoyed look is back on his beautiful face.
“Come on. I’ll show you where you to the guest room. There’s an attached bathroom, so you can wash up when you want to.”
Mateo follows me to one of the guest rooms. I put him down the hall from me so I can keep an eye on him. I flick on the light switch and swing open the door to usher Mateo inside the large room. A queen bed is on the right side of the room, and against the far wall is a window that overlooks the pool in the back yard. A tall, wingback chair and lamp are in the corner next to the window.
“It’s not fancy.” I glide my hand across the dresser to make sure it’s not dusty. “But the sheets are clean, and you’ll have privacy.”
“It’s fine. Thanks.” He walks to the bed and sits on the edge, giving it a bounce to test the mattress.
“I can order us something to eat. What do you like?”
Mateo just shrugs. “I’m not picky.”
“Do you like Italian? I know this great little restaurant that delivers to the neighborhood. They have the best pasta off the strip.”
“Sure, whatever.” He walks over to the window and his eyes light up. “You have a pool?”
“Yeah.” I walk over to where he’s standing and pull the shade all the way open, so he has a clear view. “You’re welcome to use it if you want.”
He turns back to me. “Really?”
“Absolutely. I’ll find some trunks you can wear.” I head back to the doorway. “Tell you what, I’ll get the food ordered and we can take a quick dip if you want.”
“Yeah, I guess.” He finally seems interested in something other than ending his life, and I’m grateful for that. I feel like we’re making progress by him putting aside his attitude, even for a little while. Obviously, the root of his troubles are still bubbling right under the surface.
But at this point, I’ll consider any progress a success.
While I dig through my dresser for some trunks he can wear, I call the restaurant and order a little bit of everything since I’m not sure what Mateo likes. Once I have the order placed and they give me an estimated hour delivery time, I grab a few shirts and shorts for him. I consider throwing in a pair of boxers but I’m not sure if that’s gross so I leave them out of the pile. If he was willing to ride his bike in a robe, he probably doesn’t mind going commando for a day or two.
I leave the pile of clothing on the guest bed then go in search of Mateo. I find him staring out the back door at the pool.
I stand beside him with my hands in my pockets. “Do you want to check it out?”
“We can wait until the food gets here.”
“They said it will be about an hour.”
He nods then looks down at what he’s wearing. “Do you mind if I take a shower before dinner?”
“Sure, I put some clothes out on your bed. Take your time.”
He’s in the shower for almost a full hour. Just when I’m starting to worry, I hear the water turn off and him moving around the room. Minutes later, the doorbell rings and the delivery woman drops off our food. Since it’s a nice night, I grab a couple bottles of water from the fridge and take the food out to the patio. The warm air is starting to cool down as the sun sets. Just as I’m getting ready to call him, Mateo steps outside and takes a deep breath.
“That smells great.” He hurries over to the table and sits down.
“Dig in.” I have most of the containers open. It’s a lot more than we can eat, but I wanted to have options. Although, half a pan of lasagna, a tray of spaghetti, chicken marsala, and their signature mushroom risotto is somewhat overwhelming.
Mateo fills his plate without hesitation. When he begins to chow down, I realize how hungry he must be and feel guilty for making him wait so long before offering him anything.
As we eat, we settle into a comfortable silence. By the time Mateo finishes his second helping of lasagna, I swear I see a smile on his lips.
“That was really good.”
“Yeah, it’s my favorite place.” I smile and tap the top of a carton, pointing to the label. “Un Piccolo Assaggio d'Italia. Don’t forget it.”
Mateo actually chuckles as he repeats the name. “I’ll try not to.”
“Well, we can sit here for a bit or go for a swim...”
He leans back in the chair and rests his hand over his flat belly. “I think I’ll wait on the swim until my food settles. If that’s okay.”
“Absolutely. Whatever you want.”
He yawns and then stands up. “Actually, I’m a little tired. I think I might just go to bed.”
I study his demeanor to make sure he’s sincerely. He does look tired so I don’t press him on his true intentions. “Okay, but if you need anything, just let me know. I’m the last door on the right.”
“Thanks, Chase.”
Mateo disappears into the house and up the stairs while I stand and watch. I don’t think I’ve made any impact on his life yet, but at least he’s still alive.
And that’s all I can claim at this point.