Walking from room to room, I double checked everything before I left my condo for the weekend. I wouldn't be gone long—the meet was in Pennsylvania and we'd be back early Sunday afternoon.

I switched the light off and shut the door behind me and locked it. I glanced at my watch as I made my way downstairs to the parking lot. The girls’ team was meeting up at Kova's house, and from there, Katja would drive us to the airport where we'd meet the boys' team before we boarded the flight.

Throwing my carry-on bag into the backseat, I climbed in my truck and started the ignition. Within seconds, I hit the main road.

The closer I got to Kova's house, the more my stomach swirled nervously into tight little knots. Things between us were tense this past week. I tried to show my gratitude often, but Kova was strictly business and told me that if I wanted to show my thanks that I needed to practice like I meant it. I figured he thought I was trying too hard and it was showing. I was, and I wasn't. I just wanted to make sure he knew I was thankful, but instead it made him distant. With the way he'd acted, I had to wonder if Katja, or anyone, ever showed him gratitude. We were good in public, but I also felt like he was going out of his way to ignore me. I stressed over how he'd act the next two days at the meet.

I still didn't know why I was going with the team. It was stupid.

I pulled into the driveway and parked my car near Hayden's. I took a minute to gather my wits and wipe my face clean of any emotion before I got out.

Katja opened the front door seconds later like she was waiting near it. My stomach plummeted. Kova’s guilt was rubbing off on me. I was insanely paranoid just looking at her face.

"Adrianna," she greeted, annoyingly drawing out the N’s in my name. She appeared utterly clueless with her megawatt smile on full blast, and while that was great and all, I couldn't help feeling like a horrible human being.

There was a black throne in hell with my name on it.

"You can put your bag here and go into the kitchen." She pointed to a cluster of bags near the door as I stepped inside. "You remember where it is, yes?"

"Yes."

She shut the door behind me. "Would you like some coffee?"

"I never say no to coffee."

Her face lit up and she clasped her hands in front of her stomach. "I offered the other girls coffee but they do not like it. I did not know what to say to that."

I laughed and the knot in my stomach eased a bit. "My mom got me hooked on it to help curb my appetite. I hated it at first sip, but once I found the right flavor, there was no going back."

Katja’s perfectly tweezed eyebrows angled toward each other. "To help curb your appetite?" Her eyes roamed down my body, then back up to meet mine. "So what Kova tells me is truth?"

Paranoia struck again, but I maintained my composure and kept my face neutral.

"I'm not sure. It depends on what he told you about me. I allowed a hint of uncertainty to layer each word.

"No, he did not tell me about you, but how gymnasts in general must keep an extremely strict diet. I knew some coaches enforced it, but I have always been curious about how the parents handled things behind closed doors, if they are strict or not."

We walked side by side toward the kitchen. "Oh, well, I can't speak for others, but my mom is extreme. She'll test any diet fad out to lose a few pounds. And if it works for her, she assumes it will work for me, and usually has me on it too. The only difference is that I'll eat when she's not looking so she thinks the diet isn't working."

We stepped into the kitchen together. I glanced at the group and said hi. My eyes softened when I spotted Hayden and I smiled at him.

"But why would you ever do that?" Katja continued.

I shrugged as if it was obvious and leaned against the marble countertop. "I wanted her to stop using me as her guinea pig and get off my back."

"Is she really all that bad?"

"Sometimes." I gave her an honest answer.

"Is who that bad?" Kova asked as he strolled into the kitchen. Good God, my blood pressure skyrocketed being this close to him and Katja at the same time. How does he stay cool and collected?

"My lovely mother and her obnoxious diet fads."

"Ahh. Joy. Does she still have those special meals ordered and delivered to you? I remember that being mentioned when you first arrived at World Cup," Kova asked. There was a distinct glimmer in his gaze that gave me such a rush. I tried not to smile like an imbecile, obnoxious teen but failed miserably. I liked that he remembered.

"Yes, but I do my own food shopping now," I answered. Kova's gaze shifted from me to his girlfriend. Katja handed me a cup of coffee, then leaned her elbows on the counter. We were shoulder to shoulder when a strong fragrance assailed me. I closed my eyes and inhaled, trying to sort out the scents. Jasmine and hydrangeas mixed with vanilla coffee. It was the most intoxicating aroma I'd ever smelled, and it seeped from Katja’s skin.

I frowned and opened my eyes just in time to see Kova step to Katja. He wrapped his arms around her from behind and dropped his chin onto the curve of her shoulder as he gave her the warmest hug. My stomach flipped when he looked at me, a reserved smile tugged at the edges of his mouth. I’d love to know what he was thinking. If he took satisfaction in me and his girlfriend being in the same room together. The urge to turn away was strong, but I knew I had to fight it, otherwise it would look odd.

"I am sure you can afford to eat whatever you want," Katja said, and took a sip of her coffee. "You are young and athletic. You have a great shape to your body."

"Yes, she is in terrific shape," Kova added, too pleased with himself. "Perfect for the sport. She is much better now than when she first came to me."

My cheeks flushed and I gave them a timid smile. "I guess."

"Ah, that is because you have a gifted touch and a sight unparalleled to others when it comes to the gym, statnyy."

Kova chuckled under his breath. I wish I knew what that word meant. "You flatter me." His voice was low and rough, and it tugged at something deep inside me. He kissed the corner of her mouth and she gave him a sultry smile in return.

"Katja, what kind of perfume do you use? I love the smell," I asked to distract my thoughts.

She turned and smiled sweetly. "Oh, I do not use perfume."

Kova snuggled her closer. I didn't understand.

"It is her body wash. I have it shipped in from Russia for her," he offered up.

Ah, okay. "That's cool." I wasn’t sure how else to respond to that.

They probably took a shower together this morning and he washed her body with her special smelly shit. I kept my grimace to myself.

"Why are you wearing that?" Reagan walked over to us with her nose pointed high in the air. I'd never been so relieved to see her until now.

I glanced down at my attire, then at hers. She wore the custom team uniform typical when traveling for gymnastics competitions, where I was in boots with knitted socks, dark jeans, long-sleeved shirt, and a chunky scarf. I didn't like to be cold.

"What's wrong with what I'm wearing?" I asked, confused. "You realize we're going to Pennsylvania in February, right? It's going to be freezing."

"Yeah, but not that cold. We’re supposed to dress up, you should know this." Her voice grated on my nerves, like nails on a chalkboard. "We're not going to Siberia, jeez."

I barked out a laugh. "I would need many more layers than this to go to Russia," I said. Katja chuckled softly next to me. "I'd need an Eskimo suit."

"I said Siberia," Reagan responded in her snobby tone. I covered my mouth and laughed. She looked around in confusion. "What?"

"Siberia is in Russia. I figured you mentioned it because of Kova and Katja. It's supposedly like the coldest town there."

Reagan looked down and fidgeted with her nails. "Oh."

"What do you care what I'm wearing? I'm not competing anyway. And the meet isn't until tomorrow night, no one will see us coming off the plane."

"I don't know… I figured you'd act like you're part of the team."

I saw red. "I am—"

"Ah, Reagan," Kova interrupted. He always said her name a little differently than the rest of us, like when people said tomato two different ways. "I told Adrianna she did not have to dress up." The austerity in his voice caused her to stand taller and close her mouth. He let go of Katja and stepped aside to face all of us.

He never told me that.

I smiled inwardly at his defense.

"All right, ladies," he said, and rubbed his hands together, "we need to leave in three minutes. Katja will be driving us to the airport where Madeline will be meeting us. Once we are there, you will not leave my side or Madeline's unless you ask. You all are old enough to know not to wander off, so this is the only reminder you get. When we arrive in Pennsylvania, we are going straight to the hotel. You are not to leave your room unless you phone me, or I come to you. Do you understand?" Holly, Sarah, Reagan, and I nodded in unison. "Once I get the itinerary from the gym, I will let you know. Since none of your parents will be present until later, Madeline and I will be your chaperones for now."

It wasn't uncommon for parents to arrive separately from their children. Gymnasts always traveled together with their coaches. We'd sleep together, eat together, get ready before the competition. We needed our heads in the game and our focus on the sport. No outsiders influencing us negatively, like pushy parents who lived vicariously through their children.

"Yes?" Kova continued, looking at all the girls, except me. My stomach clenched, I felt a little left out. "Sound good? Okay, let us go."

---

It was much colder in Pennsylvania than I expected. I was freezing, and I could tell Reagan was too by how hard her teeth chattered and the way she held herself. Even though we didn't see eye to eye on many things, okay, everything, I felt bad. I reached into my bag and wordlessly handed her an extra scarf I had. She accepted it with a tightlipped smile and wrapped it around her neck. Scarves made all the difference, and I knew she was thankful, even though she didn't say it.

The rest of the day was quiet and simple. After we checked into the hotel, we got settled in our room. Two double beds and one bath to be shared by Holly, Reagan, Sarah, and myself. Unfortunately, I was stuck doubling up with Reagan after Sarah claimed Holly.

We all kept to ourselves and didn't speak much. I knew the girls focused on their routines and replayed them in their heads over and over and over. They set their sights on the meet. The steel determination on their faces said enough. They knew what to expect, and held their composure impeccably, like little toy soldiers. I took satisfaction in seeing this from a different perspective.

Later the girls went over their schedule with Madeline and Kova, followed up by a light dinner, where we ate next to nothing. Typical before a meet. No water weight, no bloating, no carbs, ribs protruding, and airy on your feet.

Once I dozed off to sleep early that night, a nudging startled me.

"Adrianna," someone whispered. I stirred, shifted in the bed, but not fully waking up. "Adrianna." The voice was sharper this time and so was the elbow to my side. I opened my eyes to find Reagan hovering over me. She had a pinched face to begin with, but now it scrunched up as she held a cell phone to my face.

I pulled back. "What the fuck are you doing, Reagan?"

"Your phone won't stop beeping."

"What?" My voice sounded rough from sleep. I felt like I'd just gone to bed. My eyes burned with fatigue.

Reagan held the phone closer to my face. She scowled. "You keep getting text messages and it's keeping me awake," she whispered harshly in my face.

I sat up on my elbow and looked to my right, Sarah and Holly were asleep. I grabbed my phone and read the front of the screen.

My stomach sank. I had four missed messages from Kova. All within a few minutes apart, but luckily the text itself didn't show up on the screen. I had that feature turned off long ago.

"Why is Coach Kova texting you and no one else?"

I glowered. "How the hell should I know?"

We both laid back down and I placed my thumb on the home button to unlock my phone. Reagan’s hot breath hit my neck.

"Back the fuck off, Regina." I cupped the phone to my chest and read the messages. I had a privacy screen on it, so she wouldn't be able to read much, but still.

I smiled to myself. Egotistical dickhead were words I used on him last week. I exited my messages and powered my phone off. Rolling over, I slid it under my pillow and curled up under the covers.

"What did he want?"

"Just to go over tomorrow since I'm not competing." She ate the lie right up.

She paused for a second. "He shouldn't be texting you, you know."

"And you shouldn't be snooping."

"It doesn't look right."

I was quick. "The only reason it doesn't look right is because you're making it not look right. What are you getting at?"

"I want to know what he said."

I sighed in annoyance. "He texted to tell me that my parents still have the hotel room booked, so I can stay in there tomorrow instead of here if I wanted to."

"And that couldn't wait until the morning?" she argued.

"Regina?"

"What?"

"Go the fuck to sleep."