Chapter 8

Tom stopped, his breathing cutting through the silence. “Why not?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” she told him honestly. “There’s nothing wrong with me.”

Tom started to pull out but she wrapped her arms and legs around him. “Please,” she begged. “Finish. This feels so good, to have someone inside me.” He started to thrust again but there was a hesitation in his movements that hadn’t been there before.

“It doesn’t feel right,” he said a minute later as he stopped moving. “I feel like a selfish bastard.” He blew out a frustrated breath.

“You’d be doing it for me,” she argued, stroking his hair back. “Isn’t it about me? What I want? I want to feel you come inside me. I want you to finish. Please. I know you can’t understand, but I need that. I need to feel like a woman.”

He kissed her hard on the mouth. “You are all woman,” he told her firmly. “It’s not that I can’t come. Hell, I’ve been holding back since the minute I slipped into this hot, wet pussy. You have no idea how amazing you feel to me. It’s just that it feels selfish. I want something for you, too.”

“This is all for me,” she said with an incredulous laugh. “Oh my God, you feel amazing, too. Don’t you get it? Coming would be nice, but I needed this, too. Just being with someone.”

He hugged her tight. “Be careful what you ask for,” he warned her. “I’m about to go crazy on you. No lie. Hearing a woman talk about how great you feel when you’re fucking her flips a big, macho switch.” Carmina laughed.

“Go crazy,” she whispered, and then she bit his earlobe. Suddenly everything was easy with him. She felt comfortable, not awkward at all, despite the fact he knew her secret. He hadn’t freaked out or anything. His reaction just proved how generous he was. He was perfect. Perfect for this, for being her first since Afghanistan. If he’d been some pushy guy, or the kind who got freaked out by personal shit, then she’d be a basket case. Instead she was getting fucked. Finally.

Tom looked at her and grinned. Then he pulled almost all the way out and snapped his hips, driving into her firmly. Not rough, not too fast, but hard enough to make her really feel him, pushing her slightly up the mattress. She slid back into place as he pulled out and then he did it again. Her surprise gave way to delight and she grinned at him. He leaned down and kissed her hard, but his lips softened as he thoroughly explored her mouth, his hips driving his cock into her until she was breathless again, wet and trembling in that place she knew so well. But she knew she wouldn’t tumble over tonight. She didn’t focus on that but instead she focused on Tom and the way he smelled, the spicy fragrance of his cologne mixed with the distinctive smell of men’s deodorant. His skin was smooth and hot, with a damp sheen of perspiration that made her palms glide over his muscles. She moaned at how good it all was, her senses overwhelmed by him.

Tom kissed her neck and then he sucked on it, his tongue swiping her sensitive skin, and she shivered. “Keep acting like that and you’re going to make me come,” he whispered, his voice harsh with restrained passion.

“Good,” she said. “I want to make you come.”

“You’re the sweetest woman I ever met,” Tom said fervently. She could tell he was teasing her.

“Please come,” she begged. “I’m dying to feel it, to watch you.” She wrapped her legs higher around his waist and met his thrust. It felt so good she threw her head back into the pillow and bit her lip.

“But you feel so good I don’t want it to end,” he groaned. “You’re so tight and hot. Damn, girl, so good.” He groaned again and she could tell he wasn’t teasing now. He moved within her faster and harder, and she felt the muscles in his shoulders tense up as his breathing quickened.

“Yes, yes,” she encouraged him breathlessly. “Please.”

When he came it was a thing of beauty. He threw his head back and groaned and the tendons in his neck stood out as he gritted his teeth. He stretched up, all his weight on his arms as his hips jerked against her. She felt the heat of his semen as it filled the condom. She wished they didn’t have to use one and she could feel it with no barriers between them, but she wasn’t crazy or stupid. Under her legs, wrapped tight around him, she could feel the tight muscles of his butt as he ground into her. She wanted to remember it all, because chances were this was the only time she was going to get Tom Kelly into her bed.

When he was done, he lowered himself onto on his forearms, breathing heavily. He leaned over and kissed the upper swell of one breast and she realized with some shock that he hadn’t really paid any attention to them. Clearly he was an ass man. She smiled just as he looked up at her.

“I feel like a total shit,” he said, rolling off of her to flop onto his back next to her. “That is the first time I have ever come without my partner coming, too.” He turned to look at her, his eyes troubled. “Are you sure you didn’t mind?” She shook her head.

“It’s all good,” she said. She felt her awkwardness coming back and rolled away from him, planning to get up and put something on.

“Stay right there,” Tom ordered her. He climbed out of bed. “I’ve got to get rid of this. Don’t move. I’ll be right back.”

As soon as he left she scooted off the bed. She picked up her dress and tossed it on a chair and then picked his clothes up off the floor, too. She was standing there indecisively, the clothes clutched to her chest, not sure what to do with them, when he reappeared in the bedroom doorway. “I thought I told you to stay put,” he chastised her. He came over and pried the clothes out of her hands. He dropped everything but his T-shirt. “Arms up,” he said. She was confused until she realized he meant to put his shirt on her. Dumbfounded, she raised her arms and let him. It was huge, covering her almost to her knees. He laughed as he stood back and looked her up and down.

“Why?” she asked. And how, she wondered. How had he known she was embarrassed and wanted to get dressed?

“I wanted to see you in my clothes,” Tom said. “It’s a guy thing.” He shrugged. He leaned over and picked up his boxer briefs and stepped into them. “Let’s get something to drink, and then we’re going to talk.”

The dreaded talk, she thought. She made a face.

“None of that,” Tom told her, taking her hand and pulling her toward the kitchen. Her apartment was laid out in a similar fashion to his, but smaller in scale. Sam helped pay her rent, because she couldn’t afford it on her disability pay. When she’d moved to Birmingham, he’d said he wanted her close, and she’d been so confused she’d let him talk her into it. She’d also gotten the impression he needed her there. He’d still been dealing with some heavy stuff from the attack and his injuries, and she understood it, understood what he was going through better than anyone else.

Tom handed her a glass of water and took a drink of his, watching her over the rim of his glass. She grew uncomfortable and looked away, sipping her own drink. They were standing in the middle of the kitchen and she could see the lights of Birmingham through her living room windows. She’d left the blinds open. She usually did, because she liked how open and big it made the apartment feel.

“Come on,” Tom said, heading out of the kitchen. He didn’t grab her hand this time. “I want to climb back into bed. I’m tired and cold and I like your mattress.” He didn’t look to see if she was following him. She only hesitated a second before hurrying after him. Did this mean he was staying the night? Did he want to have sex again? She could definitely do that.