Jacob meets me at the door when I get home. “I thought we had a pact,” he says the second he swings the door open. He’s been waiting to pounce on me for not checking in.

I hold up my hand. “We did, I mean we do. I’m so sorry, Jacob, I…”

He cuts me off and grabs me by the shoulders. “Olivia, where’s your dress? And why on earth aren’t you wearing shoes? It’s freezing outside, and there’s snow on the ground for Christ’s sake.”

“The dress and the shoes aren’t mine, and I didn’t have any other shoes to wear home.” A shiver runs through me. I didn’t realize how cold I was until I stepped into our warm apartment.

“What did he do to you? I’ll kill him, I swear. I don’t give a fuck how rich and powerful he is. If he put his hands on you, and you didn’t want him to, he’s dead.”

I step forward and allow him to envelop me into his arms. He pushes the door closed and leads me to the couch where I kick off my socks, and we snuggle under a fuzzy blanket until I’m warmer.

“He didn’t do anything I didn’t want to do.”

“Then why are you sneaking out in your socks?”

“It was an amazing night, truly the best date I’ve ever been on.”

“So the party was fun, just not after?”

“There was no party, he wanted to have me over for dinner, and afterward, he had arranged a firework display for me.”

“Wow, fireworks, huh? Kinda flashy. I don’t like it.”

I slap him on the chest playfully. “Stop, that part was sweet, so was dinner. In fact, the entire night, including out-of-this-world sex, was great.”

“Out of this world, huh? I figured he would be great in the sack. You can tell me more about that later. Why the glum face and wet feet then?”

“He’s got some issues I’m not sure I can deal with.”

“Such as?”

“He took me to a small cottage on his property. Oh, he lives in a ten-thousand-square-foot historic mansion. Did I tell you that?”

“No, you didn’t, but wow.”

“Yeah, wow. So, he took me to this cottage saying he had another surprise for me there.”

“Oh my God, Livy, don’t tell me he’s into some Fifty Shades of Grey kinky shit.”

“No, I mean, I don’t think so. That’s not what I’m getting at, though.”

We are laying on the couch my back to his front, and he pulls me closer. “I don’t know if I like that answer but go on.”

“The surprise was a puppy, a Husky from the same breeder he got his dogs from.”

“A dog? That’s presumptuous. Obviously, he doesn’t know you can’t have dogs where you live.”

“No, I’m pretty sure he knew. That’s what has me upset.”

“Okay, you lost me again.”

“He never came out and said it, but I think he got me the puppy and showed me the cottage because he wants me to live there. I told him about the apartment’s rules, and he said when I find a new place, I can take the puppy. I told him I wasn’t planning on moving, and he said I could visit Lady at the cottage anytime I wanted. But, he had to leave this morning, and his cook let it slip that the cottage was a rental property, and I’m pretty sure he was trying to manipulate me into living there.”

“That’s a bold move for a first date, you sure?”

“No, but all signs point that way.”

“Why did he leave this morning?”

“Oh, get this, his ex, the one in the photographs I showed you?”

“Yeah.”

“She’s in the hospital, and they called and asked him to come right away. He told me she has him listed as an emergency contact. He was going to keep me updated via text and come home as soon as he could, but I woke up late, and he still wasn’t there. I showered and had breakfast and text him but still no answer. Then, when the cook told me that shit about the cottage, I took off.”

“Shit. I hope she didn’t die or something.”

“What? Don’t say things like that. I don’t wish harm on the poor girl.”

“No, I mean if he didn’t come home or call, there had to be a good reason for that. Maybe he’s grief-stricken or in shock. Did you try to call him?”

“No, we hardly know each other. I didn’t want to bother him, especially if it’s some traumatic thing. I wouldn’t know the first thing about comforting him.”

“So you ran?”

I cringe at his words. I’m notorious for running from my problems. It’s one of the reasons I opened my shop in Seattle and not somewhere in California where I’m from. I wanted a fresh start away from all the hurt and pain of my past, even if it meant leaving my sick mother alone to be cared for by strangers.

I sigh and close my eyes. “I did, Jacob. I don’t want to be manipulated. He should have asked if I wanted a pet or if I was looking to move into a new place alone. But he didn’t, he took it upon himself to try to make those big, life-changing decisions for me without asking.”

“You don’t know that for sure. He never asked you to move in.”

“He’s a control freak. He had a full closet of clothes for me this morning and toiletries. It’s like he assumed we would fall madly in love on the first date or something. It’s too much, I can’t.”

“Whoa, honey, clothes, toiletries? That is kinda freaky for a first date.”

“And a second and a third and fourth. I don’t think this is a rich-guy thing either. He admitted to me that he is obsessive about being prepared.”

“I’ll say. There could be worse things, though, you know? Do you like him? You said the sex was amazing. Relationships are all about compromise and understanding. Maybe you should just ask him to slow down a little. Tell him he’s freaking you out, and you can’t be with him if he’s going to be so assertive.”

“Yes, I liked him, a lot. It’s crazy, Jacob. It felt like we had known each other all our lives. We have a connection and the sex… whoa. I’ve never been with someone like him. He knows what he’s doing.”

“Hmm, now I’m a little jealous. He’s hot, don’t get me wrong, but I thought he might be a little old-fashioned since he’s older.”

“Old-fashioned Alex Wolfe is not. He knows things about my body I didn’t know.”

“Now you have me curious. What does he know?”

“That I can have more than one orgasm per day for one thing.”

“One a day? Honey, you thought you were a one-and-done girl?”

“No, I was a one-and-done girl my whole life until last night. I can’t even count how many times he made me come.”

“You found a unicorn. Wow, what a lucky girl you are,” he says with awe.

“A unicorn, that’s a good way to describe him. A control-loving, prepared, sex-god unicorn.”

“I think you should give him a chance. Talk about boundaries, of course.”

“I don’t know. This is the kind of thing I try to avoid. He’s great, but I feel like he’s going to monopolize my mind and heart. How will I concentrate on work and success if all I can think about are orgasms and puppies?”

“Oh, honey, that’s love. It’s supposed to do all that and much more. You’ve already got success, now it’s time to focus on other things. You will find time for both, you’re a smart cookie.”

“I am?”

“Definitely, I have complete faith in you.”

“I love you, Jacob, thank you.”

“You’re welcome, and I love you, too.”

“How was your night?” I ask, feeling guilty for only focusing on my issues.

“It was fine, nothing like yours, that’s for sure.”

“Did you get lucky?”

“No, but that’s all right. I like Gabe a lot, and I want to go at his pace. It’ll happen when he’s ready, and after last night, he isn’t going to last much longer.”

“I’m happy, you deserve someone good.”

“I do, don’t I?”

“Yes, you’ve had quite a string of douchebags if you don’t mind me saying so.”

“I don’t mind. It’s true. If you and the Wolfe work things out, we should go on a double date or maybe have dinner here.”

“Don’t get ahead of yourself. I’m still not sure about the Wolfe.”

“Okay, okay, the three of us then, for sure.”

“Are you sure you want a third wheel?”

“Positive, I love a good threesome.” He pushes his hips up, and I scoot forward.

“That would be like having sex with my brother and his boyfriend, gross.”

“You’re right, ew.”

“Okay, what are we doing for the rest of our day off?” I ask.

“Hmm, how about movies, wine, and snuggling on the couch?”

“Oh my God, you read my mind. That sounds like heaven. I’ll get the wine, you pick the movies.”

“Done, bring snacks, too!” he calls after me.

“In a minute, I’m changing out of these clothes first.”

When I’m in a pair of yoga pants and a baggy hot pink sweatshirt, I return to the kitchen to grab every bag of junk food we own. Unfortunately, we eat pretty clean, but we do have the mandatory family-size bag of Cheetos and some popcorn and M&Ms to go with our wine.

“We’re fresh out of Skittles, but I found these,” I say raising the bottle of wine, M&Ms, and Cheetos in the air as I enter the living room with a smile. Jacob doesn’t answer right away, and my smile falters when I see why.

Alex is standing on the threshold of our apartment looking pale and broken holding a baby car seat in one hand and two bags on the opposite shoulder. I’m at a loss for words, but thankfully Jacob isn’t.

“What’s going on Alex?” he asks him as if he’s known him for years.

“I need help,” he says, and even though I don’t know this man well, I am in tune enough to realize that he rarely asks for help. I set down the snacks and wine and go to him taking the bags from his shoulder.

I guide him inside like he guided me all over his house last night and encourage him to sit on the loveseat which he does like a zombie. He sets the baby carrier down next to his feet and avoids looking into it, but I don’t.

Inside is a beautiful little girl with giant ocean blue eyes and a head full of shocking inky-black hair that matches Alex’s. She’s looking up at me searching for a familiar face, and when she doesn’t find one, her bottom lip quivers.

“Alex, whose baby is this?” I ask unbuckling her quickly to get her out before she starts to cry. He doesn’t answer. He’s staring at his feet.

“Honey, is he okay?” Jacob asks standing next to me taking in the scene.

“I don’t know, but this one is about to cry,” I say lifting her out. She’s dressed in fluffy pink footie pajamas, and her cheeks are turning redder by the second until I cradle her in my arms.

I did a lot of babysitting as a child. My mother didn’t have any money to spare. We lived on her disability, so I did what I could to help make ends meet and care for Shep.

The little girl coos and pulls my hair when she’s safely in my arms, and I sit down on the coffee table in front of Alex. “Hey, are you okay?” I ask again touching his cheek.

As upset as I was with him this afternoon, I can’t bear to be now. He’s clearly suffering, and I want to help. He raises his gaze to mine, his eyes pleading for something—help, forgiveness, sympathy, advice? I can’t tell which, and he isn’t speaking.

I motion toward the kitchen. “Get him a drink, Jacob. Something strong.”

Alex leans forward with his elbows on his knees and drops his head into his hands pushing his fingers through his dark hair. “She’s gone,” he says so low I can hardly hear him.

“Who’s gone?” I ask.

“Lilly,” he says her name with twisted agony.

I bounce the little girl on my lap and support her back with my free hand. “What do you mean gone?” My belly flips when I ask the question. I feel like I already know the answer.

“She’s dead.”

“Oh my God,” I gasp and squeeze the baby harder.

“Here you go,” Jacob says handing Alex a glass of whiskey almost full. Alex takes it and downs it in one drink handing the glass back without a word.

“She died? She looked healthy the other day in the shop. Was she in an accident or something?”

“She had stage four breast cancer. She never told me, but she didn’t die from the cancer. She slit her wrists.”

“Fucking hell,” Jacob murmurs sitting down behind me. I don’t know what to say. I’m still confused about the baby. “She killed herself?” I whisper to no one in particular.

“Yes.” He releases his hair and looks up at me holding the baby. “And that’s my daughter.”

I lurch forward, my mouth falls open, and my eyes pop. “What?” This is too much insanity all at once. I can’t process it all.

I watch Alex swallow hard and choke back emotion before he speaks again. “She uh, I guess she knew she was terminal, so she decided to speed up the process.”

“And the baby?” Jacob asks.

“I never knew she had her. She got pregnant, and I told her to have an abortion. That’s when I knew I couldn’t marry her like she wanted me to. I couldn’t imagine having a family with her. She told me she had gone to Europe to have the abortion and get her life back together, but she must have…”

“She went to have the baby. My God, Alex.” I reach out and take one of his hands, and he holds onto me like a man drowning would a life preserver.

“I didn’t love her, but she didn’t deserve to die like that, alone and desperate. If she had told me, I could have helped. I would have gotten her the best doctors, treatments, medicine. She could have lived.” Tears stream down his face, and my heart cracks in two.

It’s hard watching a strong, powerful man become vulnerable and downtrodden. I want to take him in my arms and tell him everything will be okay, but I know better.

I take a deep breath and try to absorb all that’s happening. Alex has a baby, one he had no idea about, and he’s mourning the loss of an ex-girlfriend he cared about but didn’t love. Not to mention the guilt I’m sure he is feeling for breaking up with her and telling her to have an abortion.

“Alex, this wasn’t your fault. She was an adult, and she made her own decisions. If she didn’t tell you, she had her reasons, wrong as they may have been.” He stares at the baby in my arms, and the tears continue to flow down his face. He can’t hear me, this is too traumatizing.

“Jacob, can you take the baby for a minute?” I lift the pretty girl up and pass her off to him. “Alex, come with me,” I say taking his hands to pull him up. He doesn’t resist as I lead him down the hall to my bedroom. “Come, lie down and rest for a bit. You’re exhausted, and you haven’t had any sleep. I’ll keep an eye on… what’s the baby’s name?”

“Faye.”

“That’s a pretty name. I’ll take care of Faye, you sleep, and when you wake up, we will try to figure all of this out, okay?”

He sits on the edge of the bed still in a state of shock while I crouch down in front of him and remove his shoes. I take his coat off and lift his legs onto the bed. He rolls away from me and pulls his knees up. I cover him with a blanket my mother crocheted for me before she lost the ability to move her own hands and kiss the back of his head.

“Will you be okay alone?” I ask, and he nods.

I leave the door open and make my way back into the living room where Jacob is holding Faye away from his body like she’s a giant germ. “Jacob, what are you doing?” Faye is wide-eyed and kicking her tiny feet that are dangling in the air.

“Holding the baby. You told me to hold her.”

“Not like a bag of trash, give her here.” I take her, and she nuzzles against my shoulder. “Her name is Faye, that’s all I got out of him. He’s going to sleep. He couldn’t have had more than two or three hours last night, and this is all so…”

“So fucking insane?”

“Jacob, the baby,” I say raising my eyebrows.

“Oh shit, sorry. I’m not used to being around kids. You’re going to have to cut me some slack on the cursing.”

“You have two sisters and a brother, you’ve been around plenty of babies.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t curse back then. My mom would have smacked me upside the head, you know that. Besides, she’s too little to understand me.”

I look at Faye’s sweet face. “You’re right. I wonder how old she is.”

“She looks like she’s about nine or ten months.”

“I suppose that would make sense, they broke up a year and a half or two years ago. That’s enough time to go to Europe, have a baby, and come home.”

“I wonder how long she knew she had cancer?”

“I don’t know… long enough to plan her suicide, I guess.”

“That’s so sad. Wait, is he sure she’s his?”

I look at Faye and back at Jacob. “Have you looked at her? She looks like his mini-me.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I don’t remember a lot of what Lilly looked like, but that kid has all of the Wolfe genes going on.” He sits on the couch and stretches his arms along the back of it. “So now what?”

“I don’t know. I guess we change her diaper and feed her something while he sleeps.”

“Didn’t Lilly have any family? I mean, how’s he going to take care of a baby?”

“How does anybody take care of a baby? Most parents figure it out as they go along.”

“But to have a kid dropped into your life like that so unexpectedly, I can’t imagine how he’s going to cope.”

“I’ll help him,” I say surprising myself as much as Jacob.

“I thought you were freaked out with his controlling ways and manipulation.”

“I was a little, but it was me he came to when his world got rocked. I can’t turn my back on him.”

“Doesn’t he have any family?”

“He mentioned his mother, but it didn’t sound like they had a very good relationship, and his father died when he was in high school.”

“No siblings?”

“No.” I don’t bother to mention the twin brother that died in utero.

“Well, he has a lot of money. I’m sure he can hire a live-in nanny or something.”

I sit on the couch and prop Faye in my lap facing me. She reaches for my necklace and pulls on the key dangling from my neck. “Oh no, no, don’t pull on that,” I tell her peeling her chubby fingers from the charm. “She needs some toys or something. Can you look in one of those bags?”

Jacob stands and crosses the room to the chair where I left the bags Alex had slung over his shoulder. He rummages around for a bit before pulling out a few plastic rings and three books. “This?” he asks holding them up.

“Yeah, that’s fine, and grab a diaper and some wipes, too, if there are any.”

He sits back down with me handing Faye a red tube that she puts directly into her mouth. “I also found this,” he says passing me a thick notebook.

“What is it?”

“I think it was Lilly’s. Maybe it has information in it about Faye?”

I open it up and find a journal beginning last July. “It’s a journal, should I?” I look to Jacob for advice as I so often do.

“I don’t know, honey. I mean, she’s dead, but maybe you should check with Papa Wolfe first?”

“You’re right, what was I thinking?” I close it, and a few loose papers slide out. I flip them over and find one of them is a birth certificate. It’s in French, but it’s clear that it belongs to Faye, Faye Alessandra Wolfe, né sur 1er Avril, 2017. I don’t understand French, but it’s easy to see she was born on April Fool’s Day last year making her around, if not exactly, nine months old.

“She’s nine months old, and she was born in France.”

“Ooo, a little Frenchie. Are you a little French princess?” he says tickling Faye’s feet. She squeals with delight and reaches for him.

“She likes you. You know what that means, don’t you?”

“Oh, no, no, I am not changing a diaper. You want to help the sexy beast that’s fine but count me out of diaper duty.”

“He’s a wimp. Don’t worry, I’ve got you.” I scoot back and lay her down between us on the couch much to Jacob’s horror.

“Right here? On the couch?”

“What? You’ve had sex on this couch, and I still sit here. Don’t try to deny it.”

He shrugs and settles back against the cushions to watch me change Faye’s diaper.

“So, I guess watching It is probably out then, huh?”

I glance down at Faye who is kicking her feet and reaching over her head to scratch at Jacob’s jeans. “She won’t understand it. Go ahead and put it in. I’m going to see if she has a bottle or something to eat in her bags. I don’t know what her schedule is. It’s late, so maybe she’ll fall asleep?”

“Maybe. I’ll put the wine away, though.”

“Bring me a Coke, will you? I can’t eat popcorn and Cheetos without a drink.”

“Yep, one Coke coming right up.”

I slide down onto the floor and push the coffee table away from the couch with my feet. With Faye lying on the floor between my legs, I go through her bags and find a notebook with her feeding schedule on it. Lilly was a good mom. She has her schedule written out for Alex to follow like she was dropping Faye off for the weekend not the rest of her life. Without warning, tears fill my eyes for all the sadness this child will know one day when she learns her mother took her own life rather than spend what short amount of time she had left with her.

“Hey, what’s with the tears?” Jacob says setting my can of Coke on the coffee table.

“I don’t get it.”

“Get what, honey?” He settles in on the floor next to Faye and me.

“Why would she kill herself? Wouldn’t you think she would want to spend what precious time she had left with her baby?”

“You never know, she was dealing with a lot these last couple of years. The man she was in love with dumped her and told her to get an abortion. That’s some harsh shit. And then she had to move to another country and hide her child from him. Top it all off with terminal, stage four cancer, and she probably snapped.”

“How could he do that? He was with her for over three years, and all of a sudden he just up and said sorry, nope, not interested, get rid of the kid, I don’t want either of you.”

“I’m glad you said it and not me.”

“So you think he’s a monster?”

“You know me better than that. I have a feeling there is more to the story than that, but if not, then yes, he’s a douche-waffle for sure.”

“I’m afraid to ask him about it when he wakes up.”

“You have to do it. If you don’t, I will. I won’t watch you fall for someone like that and get hurt.”

“Thanks,” I say nudging his shoulder with mine. He leans over my shoulder to look at the feeding schedule notebook.

“What did you find?”

“Her schedule. She’s due for a bottle.”

“Hand it over. I’ll warm it up.”

“The formula is in the bottle, looks like she needs…” I flip the page and find the place that says she drinks eight ounces. “Eight ounces of water. Use bottled water. I don’t think tap water is good for babies.”

“Got it.” I hand him the bottle, and Faye’s eyes follow it and Jacob out of the room. She’s about to cry when I dangle a little pink doll in front of her face to distract her.

An hour later, we are halfway through our movie, and Faye is full and sleeping on the couch between us. “This isn’t that scary,” I say after watching Pennywise, the clown, dance like a psychopath in his floating lair.

“It is if clowns freak you out,” he says pulling his legs up and wrapping his arms around his knees. I’d almost forgotten Jacob had a bad experience with a clown when we were kids.

“Why did you choose this movie? You hate clowns.”

“We’ve seen everything else, and I thought I was over the clown thing. Guess not.”

“Do you want to shut it off?” I ask in my best little kid voice.

“No, I don’t want to shut it off, smarty pants.”

I laugh, and he throws a handful of popcorn at me. “You’re cleaning up this mess, not me.” I lean over and pick a piece of popcorn off of Faye’s face. It didn’t even faze her.

“What are we gonna do when this clown is done making new nightmares for me tonight? The Wolfe is in your bed, and baby Wolfe here is hogging the couch. You don’t have anywhere to sleep.”

“I don’t know, maybe we can move her into your bed, and we can sleep with you?”

“My mattress isn’t waterproof.”

“She wears diapers. She isn’t going to wet your bed.”

“You sure?”

“Pretty sure, but we can put a couple of towels under her to be safe.”

“Okay, maybe we will luck out, and he will wake up soon, and you three can have your own slumber party.”

“What, you don’t want company in your bed?” I say winking at him.

“Not company that wets the bed, but I’ll do it for you.”

“Thanks.”

“Maybe you should check on him.”

“You think?” I’ve been so focused on the baby, I hadn’t thought that Alex might need looking after, too. Jacob shrugs, and I unfold myself from the couch. “I’ll be right back.”

“Yeah, don’t leave me with the offspring. I don’t know what to do with her if she wakes up.”

I shake my head and chuckle. I have his number. I know he’s much better at taking care of a baby than he’s letting on, but he’s afraid of getting attached. Jacob has a big heart, and it breaks easily.

Tiptoeing down the hall to my bedroom, I hear Alex rustling around in my bed. I stop on the threshold to hear his muffled voice. He’s dreaming, and in the dream, he’s pleading with someone.

I move closer, and what I hear breaks my heart all over again today. He’s begging his mother not to lock a door. It’s a nightmare, not just a dream.

“I’ll be good, I promise. Please don’t lock the door, please, it’s dark.”

What the hell happened to him as a child? Was his mother abusive? Is that why he bristled when I asked about her? I can’t stand to listen to his pleas any longer. “Alex, Alex, wake up,” I say shaking his shoulder gently. He jolts upright in the bed grabbing hold of the sheets and looking around frantically unsure of where he is.

“Alex, it’s me, Olivia. I think you were having a nightmare.”

He focuses on me, and his labored breathing slows. “Was it all a nightmare?”

My expression must answer his question, and I reach out and take his hand. He slumps over and scrubs his face with his free hand. “Oh God, I was hoping today hadn’t been real.”

“I’m sorry. I wouldn’t have bothered you, but you seemed upset.”

He raises his gaze to mine, a stray wave of his hair falling onto his forehead. I reach up and push it aside, and he takes hold of my wrist. “Olivia, I need to tell you something.”

“You need sleep, that’s all you need. Everything else can wait until tomorrow.”

He looks at the bedroom door suddenly. “Is Faye…”

“She’s fine. We fed her and changed her diaper, and she’s sleeping in the living room with Jacob.” Every muscle in his body relaxes, and he drops my wrist.

“What I have to say can’t wait until tomorrow. You must think I’m a monster knowing what you do of this whole situation.”

“I don’t think you’re a monster. Get some sleep, and we can talk in the morning.”

I try to stand, and he grabs my hand holding me in place. “No, I have to tell you now,” he snaps. I look down at his hand squeezing mine so hard it hurts. He relaxes his grip and pulls me toward him until we are both lying on the bed facing one another.

He closes his eyes for a moment as if to gather himself, and when he opens them, he begins to speak carefully.

“I am not a self-made billionaire. I worked hard to become a successful lawyer, but unlike you, I was given my education on a silver platter. When my father died, his will had been changed without my mother’s knowledge. He left me everything in a trust that I was to be given access to when I graduated college. That gave my mother eight years to punish me for something that was out of my control.”

The nightmare was about his mother abusing him. I feel nauseous thinking of him being locked up in the dark as a child. “Alex, I’m so sorry. You don’t have to relive this, it’s okay.”

“No, I do. I need you to understand. I vowed never to have children. I didn’t want a child to suffer the way I had. My mother was a loving, nurturing woman before my father died. He was an alcoholic, and the night he died, he came home drunk as usual. I was working on a school project, and he was supposed to have brought me more hot glue sticks and some foam balls from the craft store, but he forgot. When I asked for the supplies, he went into his study and started looking for a particular bottle of scotch in his bar. When he didn’t find it, he whispered to me that he was going out to buy a new one, and he would get my supplies on the way home. He didn’t mention going to the liquor store to my mother. She would have given him a hard time, so she thought he was only going to the craft store. He never came home. He wrapped his Jaguar around a tree, and she blames me for his death to this day. It was like something inside of her snapped, and all of her love for me died with my father. If that can happen to my mother, it can happen to anyone.”

“Oh, Alex.” I reach out a cup his cheek in my hand. “You’re not your mother. I’m sure you will be a wonderful father.”

“You don’t understand. What if something happens in my life that makes me snap like my mother? I can’t let anything happen to Faye.”

I smile a small oh, don’t you see smile, and he frowns at me. “Why are you smiling?”

“You were a great father before you even knew about Faye. You’ve been protecting your children from harm by not allowing yourself to have them. What happened to your mom isn’t something that can be inherited. She was devastated by your father’s death and dealt with it horribly. You will never do that.”

“You can’t know that.”

“Yes, I can.”

“How?”

“When I look at you, I see a powerful man who wants to make me happy. You’re generous and thoughtful and loving. You would never abuse a child.”

“I told her to have an abortion,” he says with so much pain in his voice I feel it in my chest.

“You were scared of repeating the past.”

“She told me she couldn’t do it. I told her she had to, or we couldn’t be together. I gave her a horrible ultimatum, our child or me. I don’t blame her for leaving me and choosing to have Faye.”

I scoot closer to him and pull his face to my chest stroking his hair. This man has been through so much, and now he has to deal with this on top of everything else. He isn’t a monster for not wanting to have a child and breaking up with Lilly. He was trying to protect an unborn child from a life like his, and he lost someone he cared about in the process.

“Faye is lucky to have you. You’ll see. She will have you wrapped around her little finger before you know it. This is going to be okay. I’m sorry about Lilly, but you couldn’t have known she had cancer. She should have come to you. She could have explained.”

“I think she was going to.”

“What stopped her then?”

He pulls away and looks me in the eyes. “Have you seen the photos of us online?”

“What? What photos?”

“Paparazzi are out in full force on New Year’s Eve. They caught us coming out of your building and getting into the limo. And a few must have been camped out outside my gate because they have a few shots of us pulling into the driveway, and you never left so they know you spent the night. That’s big news for gossip rags.”

“You think she saw those pictures and took her life because of them?”

“I can’t know for sure, but it’s a possibility. She came back here with the baby knowing she was terminally ill. Maybe she wanted to get back together with me for whatever time she had left. Maybe she wanted to give me our baby. I’ll never know now.”

I bite my bottom lip remembering the diary in Faye’s bag. “That might not be true.”

“What do you mean?”

“Lilly left a diary in the baby’s bag. I didn’t read it. I was looking for information about Faye, when she eats, when she needs her diaper changed, things like that. I found one and put the diary back for you.”

“Thank you. I’m sorry for dumping all of this on you. I didn’t know where else to go, and all I could think about was getting back to you. When you weren’t at home, I came here.”

“I waited for a while, but you didn’t answer your phone, so I decided to come home.”

“I was stunned when they told me what had happened, and then they handed me a baby, and I shut down. Lang was worried when I asked him to bring us here, but I couldn’t go home alone with a baby. I don’t know the first thing about them.”

“It’s okay, I’m glad you came to me.”

I hear Faye squawk from the living room. I turn and kiss Alex gently on the lips and roll away from him. “Duty calls, go back to sleep. I’ve got her for tonight.”

He follows me out of bed. “She’s my responsibility, you don’t have to do that.”

I turn suddenly, and he lurches to a stop. I place my hands on his chest. “How about we do this together then. We can bring her to bed with us, and all three of us can get some sleep.”

He looks unsure, so I continue. “You’re a lawyer, if you’re going to argue your case, now’s the time.”

“No, you’re right, I don’t know what I’m doing. I need you.”

Those three words are for me as meaningful as I love you are for other people. I thrive off being needed. It’s in my DNA to support and care for those I love, and crazy as it seems, I think I’m falling in love with this man.