It’s only temporary

Ash

Stella’s been gone for two hours and miracle of all miracles Cannon is asleep. I straighten my tie and button one button of my suit jacket in front of the mirror. It’s 5:30, Stella will be back in fifteen minutes, and I will be leaving her with my terror of a son.

I would be lying if I said I hadn’t thought twice or even three times about canceling tonight. I haven’t been able to leave Cannon with anyone for years without coming home to one kind of chaos or another.

He’s a good kid deep down inside, but he’s had a rough go of it with no mother, no grandmother, and my jerk of a father as his grandpa. I cut him a lot of slack for that.

Parenting Cannon is a balancing act of discipline and showing him compassion. If I go either way too far, he acts out. When I’m a hard ass he’s wild as hell, when I show him too much grace he takes advantage, and around and around we go. There is no middle ground with him.

That’s why I am so amazed by the way he reacts to Stella. He’s like a different kid, and I don’t know if it’s an act or if she’s a natural source of calm for him. Either way, I’ll be right downstairs if Dr. Jekyll decides to turn into Mr. Hyde.

“Is Tella here?” a sleepy Cannon mumbles from my bed, not even fully awake yet.

“No, she will be in a few minutes, though.”

“Can we get ice cream?”

“I’ll let Stella decide what you two are going to do.” He smiles and hugs the pillow like he knows Stella will let him do whatever he wants.

“I won’t be late. I’m just going to dinner with some work people, and when it’s done, I’ll be back up. Tomorrow you can come with me to the convention and walk around if you behave.”

“Will Tella be there, too?” Wow, he has it bad for her.

“I’m sure she will but, you know how we are here because we own a ranch?”

“Mmhm.”

“Well, Stella is here for the same reason except she’s here because her family owns a ranch. So she might have to go off on her own and do some things separate from us, understand?”

He lowers his eyes and his brows knit together. He doesn’t like that idea. Now, I hold my breath and see how he chooses to react to it.

“Okay. But sometimes she will be with us?” He looks up, his eyes glimmering with hope.

“Yes, I’m sure we can do some things together. I’ve already asked her to meet us at the diner downstairs for breakfast.”

There’s a knock at the door, and he’s off the bed like a shot running to open it without knowing who it is again. “Wait for an adult, Cannon,” I call after him, but it’s too late.

He’s dragging Stella into the living room chatting about the convention tomorrow and breakfast at the diner. She drops her purse onto a chair and perches on the edge of the couch to listen attentively to Cannon talk.

She looked great earlier in jeans and a T-shirt, but she looks amazing freshly showered wearing a black Victoria’s Secret tracksuit. Her long dark hair is still damp making it appear almost black and she’s removed what little makeup she had on earlier revealing a more vulnerable youthful face. Of the three Stella’s I’ve seen so far: ready for the day beautiful, pissed off beautiful, and now everyday comfortable beautiful, the latter is my favorite.

“Hey, you look cute,” I say, nodding at her outfit with the words Victoria’s Secret glimmering in gold down her leg. Usually cute isn’t a word I use when complimenting women, but for Stella, right now it’s fitting.

She looks down at herself. “Yeah, well I’ve never bab… hung out with a friend who’s four and a half years old before so I figured I should be comfortable.” She had caught herself before she uttered the dreaded word babysit in front of Cannon. Good move, she might have lost his trust had she tripped up.

“Good idea. So, you’ve never been friends with a kid?” I’m pretty sure we have established that being friends means babysitting.

“No, I have two younger siblings, though. A brother and a sister.”

I round the couch and stand in front of them slipping my hands into my pockets. “So you’re used to being in charge then.”

Cannon is bringing her his book collection, stacking them on the table in front of her. “I can hold my own, yeah,” she says, looking away from Cannon for the first time. Her lips part and her eyes close and open in a slow blink. “You look fantastic.”

I smile at her reaction. I get this a lot from women, but usually, I don’t give a shit. Women only want two things from a man like me, sex and money, but I don’t feel that way with Stella.

I don’t get a manipulation vibe from her at all. There’s physical attraction, chemistry, maybe even sparks, but I haven’t felt like she had an ulterior motive for being with Cannon or me.

After what was a bit of a forced start, I realize she genuinely seems to enjoy our company and that’s a first for me and I think Cannon, too.

“Thanks. I usually don’t suit up unless I’m going to a club so this feels a little weird.”

“Well, you don’t look weird at all.”

“Daddy’s the sex… sexes… se…” Stella takes pity on him and gives him a hand. “Sexiest man alive?”

“Yeah, dat.”

“Quite a little spokesman you got there.”

I sit across from her and respond, “He’s had good coaching.”

Stella rolls her eyes, “I’ll bet.”

Cannon is watching us carefully. “No, really, daddy coaches peewee.”

“You’re lucky, my daddy sucks at sports and he never coached anything. I like baseball, though. We should toss a ball around tomorrow.”

Cannon pops up off the couch about to explode with excitement but he remembers he said he wouldn’t scare Stella by yelling.

With his palms pressed together in a prayer gesture he leans his head back and closes his eyes, “Pleeease, Daddy, can we play catch with Tella tomorrow?”

My bad ass kid just used the word please and refrained from screaming when he was clearly dying to let it rip. How can I say no to that?

“Sure, if the weather’s nice and we get all of our work done I think we could arrange that.”

“Great, it’s settled then, breakfast,” she says cheerily, “work,” she says lowering her voice and lifting one corner of her lip in a side grin, “and baseball!” she ends on an upswing and a happy clap.

Minus the work part, it sounds like the perfect day.

“You better go or you’ll miss before dinner cocktails.”

I don’t even want to go to dinner now. I’d much rather hang out with these two and read The Very Hungry Caterpillar and eat ice cream. Another first.

“Alright, my phone number is on the table in the dining room if you need me, along with poison control and the local fire department. If I don’t answer and it’s an emergency, call the front desk and have someone come and get me.”

With narrowed eyes, she lowers her head and looks at me like I’ve lost my mind. “Poison control and the fire department? What in the hell do you expect to happen?”

“Believe me, nine out of ten nannies have needed both of those numbers and the tenth just used 911 regularly. Not that you’re a nanny or a babysitter, of course.”

“Nine out of ten? Are you kidding me? For this kid?” she says, hitching her thumb at the angelic dark haired boy on the couch reading a book beside her.

“Yes. For that kid.”

She makes a disgusted pfft sound and waves her hand at the door rolling her eyes. “Go eat dinner, we’ll be fine.”

She has no idea the havoc he can wreak, and I hope to God she doesn’t ever find out.

“Okay, numbers are on the table, Stella. I’ll see you later, buddy, be good.”

Cannon waves and turns the page without looking up. Stella smiles a smug as hell smile that I commit to memory. Her expressions, no matter what they are, draw me in. Anger, smugness, happiness, calm, all of it appeals to me on the same level, the scorching hot I need to have her in my bed so I can taste every inch of her level.

But I won’t, yet. She’s Cannon’s girl for now, and I’m enjoying seeing him well behaved and civilized, even if it only lasts for a few days, which I expect it will.

When she’s good and fed up with him, I’ll step in, and we can take what we want from one another. When it’s over, she will leave, and we’ll never see her again. Just like every woman who has ever touched my life.