Lucky
Lee left me.
She left me on my fucking own.
Said she had to call the family.
Well, that was two fucking hours ago.
She was a liar.
She led me into the lion's den and then abandoned me.
I was so out of my depth here.
Doctors and nurses were barking orders at Hope and all I wanted to do was pull my fucking gun out and shut those bastards up.
She was doing her goddamn best, dammit.
They didn’t need to be telling her to do any damn thing.
And that middle-aged nurse – the one with the chin hairs?
Yeah, she needed to back the fuck up and stop shouting at me to hold Hope's leg up.
Couldn’t she see I was have a personal fucking breakdown right now?
"Pant," the doctor commanded. "Pant, Hope, don’t push. The baby's head is crowning."
Pant?
I was panting.
Like a fucking dog dying of thirst.
Never in my life had I felt so frightened.
Fear for Hope as she tried to push that baby out of her body.
Fear for my life as I bobbed and weaved every left hook she 'accidentally' swung at me.
"Hold her leg," the nurse demanded. "Hold it up. Higher."
"I'm doing my goddamn best here, Whiskers," I snarled, glaring at the bearded woman. She needed to back up and fast. "Wanna fucking change positions?"
I'd never laid my hands on a woman in my life, but if she didn’t stop shouting at me, that could all change.
"Beautiful job. Baby's head is out," the doctor coaxed, distracting me from my bloodlust. "Just breathe, Hope, and wait for the next contraction."
"Breathe, baby," I added, feeling like I needed to take some of my own advice because I was burning the hell up. "You're doing so damn good, sweetheart."
"You're a bastard," she snarled, shoving me away only to pull me back again. "Oh god!" Knotting her fingers in the collar of my shirt, she dragged my face down to hers. "I'm sorry," she sobbed, pressing her forehead to mine. "I love you. I do. I love you…"
"I know," I choked out, panicking. "It's okay."
"Okay, Hope," the doctor called out from between her legs. "One more big push, and you'll meet your baby."
Rearing back, Hope slammed her body forwards, head-butting me in the process.
"Fuck," I groaned, jerking away from the bed.
"Don’t you dare complain," she snarled with a look of pure evil in her eyes. "Just suck it up and hold my hand!"
I did exactly as I was told, too afraid of this woman to make one wrong move.
Her face turned purple as she pushed with every ounce of strength she had left inside her.
And then I heard it.
The cry that changed my life forever.
"Congratulations," the doctor announced as he held the baby in his hands. "It's a girl."
A girl.
It was a girl.
I had a daughter.
A pair of scissors were thrust into my hands, but I couldn’t concentrate.
My entire focus was on the baby that had been placed on Hope's chest.
Ruined.
I was ruined.
She was so tiny.
So fucking beautiful.
And half me?
It didn’t make sense.
How could something so bad make something so good?
"Go ahead, honey," Whiskers coaxed, nudging my shoulder. "Cut the cord."
Trembling, I reached over and snipped the cord that attached my daughter to her mother.
"I can't believe you did that," I choked out, staring down at Hope with more love and respect than I knew I could hold in my heart. "You did that, HC. You made a human."
"You helped," she whispered, looking up at me with glassy eyes.
"Only with the fun part," I mumbled.
"We made this, Hunter," she whispered, staring down at our daughter with a look of pure adoration. "She's all ours."
"I know, HC." Shaking my head, I released a trembling sigh. "Goddamn, huh? We have a daughter."
"Who'd have thought, huh?" Hope replied softly. "We made a family together."
Family.
I had a family again.
These girls.
They were mine.
Leaning over the bed, I pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I love you so fucking much, Hope Carter," I told her before pressing a kiss to her lips. "I will always be here for you. For both of you." I kissed her again. "I will never leave you alone again."
"I love you too," she whispered, tears falling down her cheeks now. "Happy tears," she assured me with a smile. "Here," she said suddenly, thrusting the tiny bundle of blonde curls into my arms. "Hold your daughter."
"Does my daughter have a name?" I asked, shaking from head to toe with nervousness as Hope placed the tiny bundle into my arms.
"Abigail," Hope whispered. "It means my father's joy. I chose it before you came back to me. Because I wanted our baby to know that she was loved by her father…" Pausing, she bit down on her lip nervously. "It will probably be shortened to Abs or Abi when she's older, but the meaning is important to me. What do you think?"
My heart swelled at her words.
My father's joy…
"Abigail." I chewed the name around for a moment before breaking out in a huge smile. "Goddamn, I have a daughter with a perfect name."
"Abigail Casarazzi," Hope whispered, smiling up at me. "Our blonde haired, blue eyed baby has broken all Carter traditions."
"That's because she's a Casarazzi," I shot back with a wink. "Strong genes, baby."
I turned my gaze back to my daughter and felt a pang of something unfamiliar swell up inside of me to the point I felt I would burst.
"I will never let anyone hurt you," I promised, staring down at the little girl in my arms. Her eyelids flickered open, revealing tiny blue eyes.
"Fuck," I croaked out hoarsely, gazing down in sheer astonishment that this tiny person was my daughter. "You own me," I told her. "Whatever you need…I will make it happen for you."
"Hunter." Hope smiled wearily up at my face. "She's like thirty minutes old. All she wants is my breast."
"Then give it to her," I replied without hesitation. I pressed a kiss to her tiny head before placing her back in her mother's arms. "Hey – what about a middle name? Have you thought of one?"
Hope nodded slowly. "I have."
I arched a brow. "Care to let me in on it?"
I watched Hope as she put the baby to her breast and then sighed softly. "I think her middle name should be Hayley."
My heart.
My fucking heart was exploding inside my body.
"You'd want to do that?" I whispered, shaking my head in confusion. "Why?"
Hope looked up at me with the brightest blue eyes and said, "I owe her everything I have. You? Who you are? How hard you love? The man you are today? It all started with Hayley."
"I love you more," I managed to strangle out. "You know that, right? What I had with Hayley? It was first love stuff. Nothing close to how I feel for you. And if it came down to the wire, it's you, Hope Carter. Every single time."
"I know that," Hope replied, smiling. "I just think she deserves to be remembered."
And there she was; throwing me through another loop, making me feel so fucking unworthy of the amazing person she was.
"Abigail Hayley Casarazzi," I whispered, feeling more love in this moment than I ever thought I could. "Goddamn, Hope Carter, it's you and me, baby. Lifers."
"Ride or die, right?" she shot back, smiling.
"Ride or die, baby," I confirmed with a wink.