It’s been a week since that kiss and it’s all I’ve been thinking about. I know I shouldn’t, but a woman can dream, right? That’s the problem though. I shouldn’t be dreaming about him. I know that getting close to him will only cause problems, but what could it hurt? My therapist says that I should try the dating scene again, but the thought of letting someone get that close to me again terrifies me. Plus, how long could I possibly keep someone around before they wanted the inevitable? Letting someone in meant telling them things and I couldn’t reveal anything about my past. Slipping up would be inevitable. Two years of trying to memorize my story is starting to take its toll. The good thing is the people that I’m close to now don’t ask questions anymore. They just go with the flow. The bad thing is, I don’t think Mattie will do that. At times, I think he can see right through me. That could be a problem if he doesn’t take my story at face value. He’ll want to dig deeper because it’s in his blood. He’ll always be a detective and if I did decide to even be friends with him, I’d have to find a way to convince him that there isn’t a reason to look any further. Oh, the dilemma I have on my hands right now. On one hand, I feel the need to protect myself from him because I know that I couldn’t give myself to him fully and that’s not fair to him. On the other hand, he makes me feel safe for some reason and I need to feel that way again. I haven’t felt that in so long and I have no clue why he made me feel protected. I guess it is what it is. One could call it fate if they believe in that sort of thing. I haven’t believed in such a thing in a long time and right now fate seems to want to bring us together when we’re both trying to hide from one another.

Today I’m volunteering at the teen center again. I love it there, but I’m starting to get worried. Mia hasn’t shown up but one day this week and that day she seemed so closed off and scared. I’m not supposed to push them to talk to me, but I’d like to find a way to get her to open up. Something isn’t right there. She used to be so vibrant and carefree. Now she shies away from everyone and barely speaks to people. The crowd she usually hangs out with seems to have given up on her and stopped trying to talk to her; which makes me want to know the answers to my questions even more. If I asked the other kids, they would be suspicious of me and I can’t have that. I also can’t get anyone else involved on the police force because I don’t have any evidence. I guess I’ll just have to keep doing what I’m doing and wish for the best.

I made my rounds and all of the kids seemed to be enjoying themselves enough. Some were playing video games, others were playing cards, while the rest were either playing pool or reading. Mia was actually here today, but something wasn’t right. She was wearing more makeup than usual and she hadn’t taken her coat off. It was comfortable enough in the building, so she couldn’t be cold. It was odd, but I needed to keep reminding myself that I couldn’t do anything until she came to me or I had proof of what was going on with her. I made my way back around to her side of the building, cleaning up along the way. Once I was satisfied that everything was where it needed to be, I walked to her and sat down. I was going to try and see if she wouldn’t at least talk to me more than she had been.

“Hey Mia. How’re you doing today?”

“Fine,” she responded, without even looking up from her book.

“I see you’re still reading “The Great Gatsby.” What do you think so far?”

“It’s ok, I guess,” she whispered, still not looking up.

“Well, I’ll let you continue to read. Do you still have my card?”

“It’s at home, but I’ve still got it.”

“That’s good. You know you can use it anytime day or night, right?”

“Yes ma’am,” she whispered.

“I just wanted to make sure. See you later.”

“Bye, Miss Emily.”

I took a deep breath and walked away from her. I wanted to keep pressing, but with teenagers today you couldn’t or they would clam up and stop talking. I couldn’t risk that. I just hoped she would eventually use my card when she felt like she could open up. I didn’t want to see anything happen to any of these kids, especially her. Before she started to change, she wormed her way into my heart. I couldn’t give up on her. I would just keep reminding her until she realized I meant what I said and felt comfortable enough.

Before I knew it, the time came for me to go home. The hours always flew by when I was here. I felt like I was doing the right thing when I walked through the doors. It made me feel better about the decision I’d made almost three years ago. I needed these things in my life so that I didn’t think about what was left behind. Thinking about the past only led to heartache and more what if questions. They were pointless and only caused me to doubt everything. Doubting my decision would get me nowhere because I didn’t have a choice.

I got into my car and plugged my phone into the radio. Listening to music would help get me out of the funky mood I was in. It would also distract me from where my thoughts had been heading before. Getting back into the right frame of mind was important to me. I needed to get my focus back on the here and now. The past is just that; the past. I wasn’t going to let it rear its ugly head. Especially when things were beginning to look up for me. I had great friends and a great career. Plus, I might have someone new to add to the list of people that are significant in my life. Who knows where that might lead? Making it clear to him that friendship would be the only option was something that I needed to remind myself to do. Putting my heart on the line wasn’t an option. I couldn’t let someone find out who I was. That could be dangerous for everyone involved and I needed to protect myself and those I cared about.

I made my way home and decided that a bubble bath was in order. I retrieved some towels from the linen closet and got some matches to light the candles in the bathroom. Once the water was turned on, I made sure the temperature was perfect and added some of my favorite bubble bath. While waiting for the tub to fill, I lit the candles and adjusted the light to where it was barely on and the room would glow from the candlelight. I stripped from my clothes and turned off the water once the tub was filled. Sinking down in the tub, I hoped that the warm water would relieve the stresses from the day.

* * *

Working night shift really sucks. At least here in Maine, we had the same partner. Meaning that we always had the same schedule. It was just hard to adjust your sleep patterns when they were constantly changing. I was beyond exhausted. Mason and I were both making notes on some case files when a call came in. The call was for an assault on a minor. She was currently being taken to the hospital via ambulance. This was just what I needed to wake up. We grabbed our coats and notepads and headed for the car. While driving to the hospital, I allowed myself a brief moment to think about those beautiful hazel eyes that I was beginning to grow fond of. Even though we had only been around each other a few times, I constantly wanted our time together to be more often. I know that I had vowed that relationships were out of the question, but when I was around her, all my inhibitions went out of the window. I stopped caring that I didn’t need the complications that relationships would bring and started to care about how I wanted to know his magnificent woman even more. Well, that settles it. I’m going to get to know more about her. I just had a feeling she wasn’t going to make it easy.

I pulled into the hospital parking lot and parked the car. We headed into the emergency room and I walked up to the receptionist, showing her my badge.

“Hi. I’m Detective Anderson and this is my partner Detective Cruz. We’re here to interview a minor assault victim with the last name Castle.”

She typed the information into the system to check the room number.

“Yes, Detectives. She’s in ER7. I’ll show you the way.”

She punched the access code into the door and made her way to where Miss Castle was located. I hoped I could handle seeing this poor battered girl. I wished that she would press charges on whoever did this to her. There had been one too many assault victims in Texas that refused to press charges on their attacker for various reasons, only for them to continue needing visits to the emergency room. Letting out a breath, I prepared myself when the nurse stopped in front of the door.

She was standing in front of where Miss Castle was located, when another nurse stepped out.

“Good, you guys are here. We’ve finished up the exam for Miss Castle. I’ll let the doctor know you’re here. I just want you to know that she’s refusing to talk to you guys until you find the person who’s on this card. She handed it to the doctor when she walked in. I haven’t had a chance to contact her yet. I guess I will leave it to you guys to contact her and have her come in now that you’re here. Her mother is in with her now.”

“Thanks, ma’am. We’ll take it from here,” I stated, as I took the card from her hand.

I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and glanced down at the card. Well, I’ll be damned. The card was Emily’s. How did she know the victim and why does she have her card? I guess I was about to find out. Letting out another breath, I dialed her number. Was Fate messing with me right now or is there some other explanation as to why we’re always being thrown together at the most inopportune times? I only wished that this wasn’t going to be awkward for her since we haven’t really talked since the kiss. I just needed to remain professional for the time being. The only good thing that has come out of this is that I now have her number.

* * *

This bath was extremely needed. I was lost in my own thoughts just relishing in the moment, when my phone rang. Whoever this was interrupting my much-needed relaxation had better be calling for a good reason. Drying off my hands, I picked up my phone from the floor. Glancing down, the number wasn’t one I recognized. I almost didn’t want to answer, but the thought came to mind that it could be Mia so I reluctantly answered the call.

“Hello?”

“Miss Jackson, how’re you this evening?”

I knew that voice. Oh God, it was him. The things his voice did to me.

“I’m good, Mattie. How’d you get my number?”

“Do you know Mia Castle?”

“Yes I do. She attends the teen center where I volunteer a few days a week. Is she okay?”

This can’t be good if he’s calling me. Especially if she gave him my card and told him to call. All the worst possible scenarios were running through my head before he started to answer my question.

“Miss Castle was brought into the emergency room via ambulance for an assault. She’s refusing to talk to anyone including her mother until she speaks with you. Is there any way you can come to Augusta General?”

“Sure. I can be there in about thirty minutes, maybe sooner depending on traffic.”

“Thanks.”

“No problem.”

I let out another breath. I released the plug on the tub and got out to dry off. I dried off and quickly dressed in jeans and a tee shirt. I didn’t care how I looked. I needed to find out what happened to Mia. The rest of the questions would have to wait. I put my hair it in a messy ponytail and put on my socks and shoes. I grabbed my purse and headed for the door.

Once I had locked up the house, I ran towards the car. I needed to keep reminding myself that speeding could cause more problems, but I couldn’t help the fear that was starting to eat at me thinking about the state Mia was in. My gut told me something like this would happen. I just wished that Mia would open up to me so that whoever did this to her would be punished.

I arrived at the hospital with ten minutes to spare. Partly because traffic was light and because I was going ten over the speed limit the entire way. I got lucky that there weren’t any cops around because I didn’t need a ticket on top of dealing with helping Mia cope with whatever had happened to her. I parked the car and made my way into the emergency room entrance.

I walked over to the receptionist and told her who I was here to see. I hoped she didn’t give me a hard time because I wasn’t family. Hopefully Mattie clued her in that he was expecting me because I know that hospitals are sticklers about their policies and who they let see patients in the emergency room. She took her sweet time looking up Mia’s name and room number. Being patient wasn’t easy for me.

“May I see your driver’s license, ma’am?” She asked.

I retrieved my license from my wallet and handed it to her.

“Miss Jackson, we’ve been expecting you. Right this way, please.”

My nerves were getting the best of me. I needed to calm down so I could be strong for Mia. Breaking down in front of her wasn’t an option. I also needed to prepare myself for what I was about to see. He didn’t tell me the extent of her injuries and I could only pray that they weren’t as bad as I was making them out to be.

I followed the nurse through the door and down the hall to her room. Mattie and Mason waiting outside of her room. Deep breaths Emily, I kept chanting to myself. I especially needed to keep my emotions in check in front of him. I couldn’t let on that this situation brought back many memories for me or how affected I was because that would lead to questions that I didn’t want to answer.

I made my way to Mattie, hoping that this assault wasn’t that bad. Even though any assault is horrible, I’ve seen cases that are worse than others. I just needed to see for myself how bad it was because my imagination was starting to get the best of me.

I stopped in front of him and waited for him to finish talking with the doctor. Once he was finished speaking with him, I stepped a little closer as he turned towards me.

“Hello, Miss Jackson. I’m hoping that you’re able to get her to open up more than her mother has. She won’t even let us in the room until she’s spoken with you,” he stated.

“I’ve been trying to get her to talk to me for a while now, but she’s been reluctant. I’ve noticed a major change in her over the past few weeks, but was hoping she’d come to me in her own time. That’s why she had my card. I wanted her to know that she could contact me day or night if she ever needed me. If you don’t mind me asking, what are the extent of her injuries? I just want to be prepared when I walk in the room so she doesn’t see how what’s happened to her is affecting me.”

“She had multiple bruises on her upper torso and both arms. There’s also bruising on her face, more so on the right side. Luckily she doesn’t have any broken bones. Her rape kit came back negative. That’s all I’ve been able to gather from the doctor and nurse seeing’s how I haven’t been allowed to question her yet,” he answered.

I took several deep breaths trying to hide my reaction to what he was saying. This is definitely bringing back too many memories. With any luck, he thinks I’m reacting this way because of what I just heard. I opened my eyes and looked back at him. Concern was written all over his face.

“Can you let her know I’m here? I want to try to help her as much as I can. Hopefully, we’ll all have answers soon enough.”

He knocked on the door and her mother answered. He informed her that I’d arrived and motioned for me to come over. I walked over slowly and she greeted me.

“Hello, Miss Jackson. I’m Mrs. Castle, Mia’s mother. Thank you so much for coming down here on such short notice. She’s always coming home from the teen center boasting about how much you help the kids. I just hope you can help her now.”

She looked like she was trying not to break down; which would most likely be any second now if she continued to talk.

“I’m going to try my best.”

“That’s all I can ask of you. She’s insisting on talking to you alone. I’m going to go get a cup of coffee while you two talk.”

She attempted to smile, but it was forced. I could only imagine what was going through her mind seeing her fifteen-year-old baby lying on that bed battered and bruised. I only prayed that I could help and not make things worse. She made her way out of the room and I made my way in. The door shut behind me causing me to jump. I stayed there in front of it for a few seconds to collect my thoughts and then made my way into the room. I walked over beside Mia’s bed and almost didn’t contain my gasp. This poor little girl that I’ve become so fond of looked so broken. Aside from the bruising and scrapes, her eyes showed just how broken she’s become. Did I miss this all along? I hope not because I don’t know how I’d feel if there were something more that I could have been doing to prevent this from happening. I made my way over to the stool and sat down, laying my purse down on the floor beside it. I took her fragile hand into mine, hoping to offer some type of comfort. She looked away from me for a moment and I feared that she’d close up before we even began. She took a couple of breaths and turned her head so that she was facing me again. I noticed that tears were now streaming down her face. I went to remove my hand from hers and she tightened the hold. This was a good sign for me to start talking to her.

“Hey, Mia. I came as soon as they called me. I told you I would be here no matter what and I meant it. I’m not going to pressure you into talking. I’ll wait here until you are ready to talk. However long it takes, just know that I’m here,” I said in a gentle tone.

I had to look up to keep the tears from falling down my face. Keeping my composure was what she needed right now. I could break down later. She didn’t need to see my tears.

She looked away again almost like she was ashamed this had happened to her. I hope she wasn’t blaming herself even though it was the pattern for women to do so.

“Mia, what happened isn’t your fault. You need to know that. We just want you to tell us so that we can stop whoever did this to you from doing it again.”

I didn’t want to be too pushy, but she also had to know that if she didn’t tell us what happened that it would most likely continue until that person was stopped.

She brought her hands up to her face and began to sob harder. I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to comfort her, but I knew that in some situations like this, people didn’t want to be touched. I was at a loss as to what to do, but she leaned into me. Wrapping my arms around her was all I could think to do right now. While I stroked the back of her head, she continued to cry. She needed to get it out before she could tell me her story.

We sat like that for what seemed like forever when she started to calm down. Leaning back from her, I reached over to the side table to grab her some tissues so she could clean herself up. Once she had wiped off her face and blew her nose, she turned to face me again.

“I’m ready to talk now, Miss Emily.”

“That’s good. Can I make a suggestion though?”

“Sure,” she replied hesitantly.

“I know that you’d rather speak to me alone, but I think it would be better for you if the detectives were in the room as well as your mom. I’m only saying this because that means you’ll have to tell your story all over again after you’ve finished telling me and I don’t think you can take doing it more than once.”

“I’m really scared to tell it in front of everyone.”

“I know sweetie, but do you think you can tell it more than once?”

“I guess you’re right. Promise you won’t leave though?”

“I’ll be here the entire time. I’m going to go get your mom and the detectives, but I’ll be right back okay?”

She nodded her head and I let go of her hand so I could go get everyone. I hoped that I could handle hearing what she had to say for her sake and for mine.

* * *

I was starting to get impatient. Pushing victims to talk only caused more problems, but I wanted to get her statement so I could make my notes and go home. I hated hospitals and cases like these. Too many memories were associated with them. I took a sip of the coffee that Mrs. Castle had brought me when the door to Mia’s room opened. Looking up, I noticed Emily standing in the doorway

“Mia’s ready to talk. I convinced her to tell the story to everyone for her sake so she wouldn’t have to keep repeating it tonight. I hope it’s okay that I told her I’d stay. She just seems more comfortable with me being there and I think the more relaxed she is, the more she’ll be willing to talk.”

Mrs. Castle agreed with her and made her way into the room. Mason and I followed behind her. Emily walked back into the room and sat on a stool beside Mia’s bed. Mrs. Castle sat on the other stool beside her. Mason and I stood in front of the bed and introduced ourselves as the detectives that would be handling the case.

Just looking at this broken teenager in front of me caused me to want to bring harm to the person who would dare hurt such a sweet young lady. I just hoped she would reveal who had hurt her so justice could be served.

“Miss Castle, can you tell us what happened tonight? I need you to be as specific as you can about the time of the assault and the details. This is going to be difficult, but we need all this information so we can build a solid case against the individual that has harmed you. Is it okay if we tape the details so we can get an accurate telling of the events that took place?”

Mia and her mother agreed. It was better this way because we could listen to the details and make notes regarding further questions that needed to be answered and see if there are any holes that need to have the gaps filled in. I took out the recorder from my pocket and pressed record. I made the necessary comments regarding the need for the interview and the names of all parties present so that Mia could begin telling us what had occurred. Once I was finished, I motioned for Mia to begin.

As she started to recall the details of the assault, I glanced over at Emily. I noticed how much she tensed at Mia’s recollection. Especially when she recalled the attacker holding her down and repeatedly punching her in the face and upper portion of her body. I couldn’t help but wonder what had happened to her to cause her to tense at the words that she was speaking. I really hope that she was just tensing because of the severity of the attack and not from personal experience. I couldn’t think about that right now though. I continued to listen to Mia and the one thing I noticed was how she steered clear of mentioning who did this to her. She needed to tell us who her attacker was so that we could arrest him. She was fidgeting with her hands, signaling that she was withholding that piece of information and possibly more, but I was going to let her finish before I started asking questions. Once she was done, I took a couple of deep breaths before I started asking the hard questions I knew that she was hoping to avoid.

“Mia, I noticed how you didn’t mention who your attacker was. Can you tell us who did this to you? If you don’t tell us, we can’t help you.”

She began to tremble and I feared that she would just close up. She looked towards Emily and grabbed her hand with what looked to be like a death grip. She nodded her head motioning that it was okay for her to continue. She closed her eyes for a couple of seconds to regain her composure and then looked back up at me.

“It was my boyfriend, Thomas Baxter,” she whispered.

“Mia, according to the doctor there was bruising that had begun to heal. Has he hit you before? Did he cause the older bruises as well?”

She hesitated before nodding her head.

“I need you to say the answer out loud so it’s recorded.”

“Yes it was him. He hit me for the first time a couple of weeks ago. I don’t understand why. We broke up after that. Today I invited him over because I honestly thought that he was sorry for what he’d done, but apparently he wasn’t.”

“Believe it or not, most women think that it won’t more times than I can count. You’re not alone in this. I think we have enough for now. I’ll go over your statement and see if there’s anything else we need, but for the time being just rest so you can recover from your injuries. We’ll be in touch.”

Mrs. Castle walked Mason and me out of the room insisting that we catch this Baxter kid and press charges against him. I told her we’d do what we could and we would keep her informed as to the progress in the case. Turning back around, I saw Emily giving Mia a hug and promising to contact her the next day. Seeing her with Mia made me fall for her even more. The compassion she held for her and how much she loved helping the kids was admirable. There was also a hint of sadness, but that could have been from the situation. Even still, I needed to know what was in this woman’s background and what was causing her the pain that she tried to hide so well.

Emily came out of the room and looked like she was about to break down. She was barely holding it together. She began making her way out of the emergency room and Mason and I followed behind her. I could tell that she was hurting and there was nothing that I could do about it.

Once outside, I called out to her to get her attention. She slowly turned around and looked up at me.

“Thanks for coming down here on such short notice.”

She nodded her head but didn’t speak. She was about to run away from me again and I needed to stop her.

“Are you by any chance busy this Saturday?”

She hesitated for a moment and shook her head. I want the spunky girl back from the football game, but she seemed to have disappeared.

“Will you go somewhere with me?”

“That depends.”

“On what?” I asked.

“On where we’re going.”

“Would you settle on it being a surprise?”

“I don’t know you well enough for you to surprise me,” she bit back.

“Do you trust me though?”

I knew I had her there. She trusted me enough to stay the night in her house even though she was drunk at the time. Her subconscious trusted me and I was hoping that it would help with this surprise.

“I guess I do, considering what you did for me.”

“Then trust me enough to surprise you. I promise that I’m not going to do anything that you won’t enjoy.”

“Don’t get any freaky ideas. What should I wear?”

“Something comfortable. Jeans, t-shirt, and tennis shoes would be perfect.”

“Sounds like my kind of fun then,” she laughed.

Her laugh was intoxicating and I could see myself becoming addicted.

“I’ll see you on Saturday then.”

“Yeah, I guess you will,” she implied, while turning to walk away.

Turning around, I started walking back towards the cruiser when she called out my name.

“Oh, this is not a date by the way. Strictly friends,” she yelled.

“I can deal with that,” I yelled back. We could start out that way, but I’d eventually convince her to be more.

We continued walking over to the cruiser and I tossed him the keys. He could chauffeur me back to the station while I collected my thoughts. Between this case and Emily, they were all over the place. I wanted justice for this young woman and to know the secrets Emily was keeping. If she only knew that her eyes are what gave her away, then she may have been able to hide it better. The detective part of me wanted to dig up everything I could, but I knew if she ever found out, her trust in me would be demolished. I would have to wait and see what I could get out of her and go from there. My patience level was small and hopefully I could rein in my curiosity to know this woman’s secrets and not go snooping where she probably didn’t want me to.

Glancing at the clock, I noticed there were two hours left in my shift. Hopefully, they would pass quickly because I doubt I was going to be able to focus on much of anything without thinking about this upcoming Saturday. My plans were to take her to this trail that I’d discovered. It was relaxing and peaceful out there. It would be the perfect place to take her to get her to open up more. I just hope I didn’t push my luck before she was ready.

Once back at the station, we filled out our reports, made the necessary notes on questions that still needed answers, and made a plan of action on catching Thomas Baxter. We also ran a background check on any Thomas Baxter’s in the area. We needed to obtain more information on this kid from Mia because he wasn’t in the system. The two hours passed quicker than I thought they would, and before I knew it, we were shutting down our computers for the day. I said my goodbyes to Mason and a few other guys that were coming on duty and made my way home. My bed was calling my name. This day was exhausting to say the least.

I showered after arriving back to my apartment and made sure I locked up before crashing into the bed. The last thoughts I had before I drifted off to sleep were that I was finally going to get this amazing woman all to myself in a few short days. They couldn’t pass fast enough.