Rivers

Cutting through the crowd, I see her get in line up ahead, but by the time I make my way over, she slips inside the bathroom.

Side-eyed by the other girls waiting in line, one snaps her fingers and points at me. “Hey, you’re Rivers Crow.”

The small hall is full of chatter until that moment. Another girl gasps and her eyes go wide. “Oh. My. God.”

Phones are pulled from purses, and I’m touched on my arm, my ass, my back, everywhere all at once. Shit. This is a really bad idea. The bathroom door swings open and my star, my beauty, grabs my wrist. “Hands off, ladies.” Then I’m pulled toward her, loving every second of her touching me again. “Come on, Riv.”

One long stride and I’m in the women’s restroom. Alone with her. A smirk pops out without my permission. The door is closed and locked to the sounds of squeals and my name on the other side. “What are you doing?”

“Saving your ass.” The right side of her delectable mouth rides up. “Thanks would be nice.”

“Thanks, but quick question. Now that you have me in here, what do you plan to do with me?”

Her body is relaxed, her shoulders not stiff and at her ears like they were earlier. She taps her fingers on her hip that’s kicked out and accentuates the curve of her waist. I receive an epic eye-roll before she turns and says, “Window.”

Looking over her, because I can, I see the window cracked open above the sink. “You want me to climb out?”

Jiggling the doorknob, she shrugs. “I can feed you to the groupies out there instead if you prefer.”

And right there, right now, I see the girl I used to love so much when I was younger. She was lighthearted and quick-witted, and this girl in front of me is my Stella. I can’t ignore the light in her eyes, the sense of adventure she sees this situation to be. She’s laughing at me, and I fucking love it.

Right now, though, I need out of here. Even though I know what I should do, I drag it out as if I’m actually debating. I like sharing this private space with her . . . even if it is a bathroom.

Someone banging on the other side of the door startles her, and the magic is lost. “You should go.” Moving around me, she cranks the old window open all the way.

“Only if you’re coming with me.”

“And leave Meadow?”

“Text her when we’re outside. I’ll text Ridge.”

“Who’s Ridge? A long-lost Crow brother?” She snorts with laughter, covering her nose with her hand. “Ridge. Rivers. Jet. Tulsa. Get it?”

“I get it.” I just don’t laugh at the joke, but she still has me grinning. Looking at her more closely, I ask, “Are you drunk?”

“Nope,” she replies, emphasizing the p and shaking her head. She runs her hand over my chest and up. “I might be tipsy, though.”

If memory serves me, and it does on a regular basis when I’m in the shower thinking about her, she gets so turned on when she’s been drinking. I take hold of her hand because her touch feels so good. The knocking gets more insistent, and the sound of my name being called from the hall seems to bring her back to the sadder version of our reality, the reality where she’s not mine. She backs away, so I ask, “Are you coming, or are we staying?”

Stella Lilith used to have an adventurous side, but I think it’s been a while since she broke a few rules. “Will you climb out first?”

There’s my girl. “Yep.” I press down on the sink, hoping it doesn’t fall off the wall. It looks old, so I’m not sure it can hold my weight. But it’s getting louder in the hall, so I climb up, grabbing an exposed pipe above the window, and maneuver my legs through the opening. Good thing we’re on the ground level. Pushing off, I land on my feet in the alley and turn around. “Stella?”

She peeks out and by the way her lips are twisted and her eyes are looking at the cement, she’s nervous. “I don’t want to fall.”

“I’d never let you. Not to the ground anyhow.”

For a second, she looks confused, but her brow relaxes and a small smile appears. “You’ll catch me?”

“Every time.”

She disappears, and I can hear her climbing onto the sink. Her legs slide out the window until her ass rests on the metal sill. “Ready for me, Rivers?”

“All my life.”

“For real,” she says, her nerves causing a slight shake to her tone. “You’re going to catch me, right?”

“Always.” I take her by the ass, and say, “Put your legs over my shoulders.”

“What? No.”

“Yes. I’ve got you. Then all I have to do is back up as you slip out.”

“I’m not as light as I used to be. Are you sure you can handle me?”

I work my way under her so her legs are over my shoulders. “Don’t worry about me, baby. I can handle you all right.”

Her thighs squeeze my neck. I like to think it was the name I slipped in there, but it’s probably because she’s anxious to do this. She slips out a little more, and our eyes meet. “You’re sure you’re ready?”

“All you have to do is let go. I have you.”

Releasing the pipe, she ducks her head to the side while I support her back with my hands, holding her until she clears the glass. Helping her upright, my face is against the jeans that cover her vagina and she’s squeezing my head with her legs so tight I don’t know if I’m going to live. What a sweet fucking way to die.

I back away from the window, and her legs loosen just enough from me to get a breath. I ask, “You okay up there?”

She’s holding my head. “Don’t drop me.”

“Never.” I start laughing, but she wobbles and leans forward. “I can’t see. Loosen your grip. I’ve got you.”

“Put me down.”

“What’s the magic word?”

“Now!”

“Tell me you’re more fun than this these days.”

“I’m not. I lead an incredibly boring life. That should send you running.”

I lean back and am met with those green eyes I’ve dreamed about for years. “Nothing could send me running anymore.”

Her hands rest on my shoulders, and she cocks an eyebrow. The smile on her face reaches her eyes where I see a flicker of the stars I adore inside. “Are you going to put me down?”

“Do I have a choice?”

That elicits the sweetest of laughs. “You’re ridiculous.”

“Am I?” I lift her so she can move her legs beneath her. She holds me as she begins to slide down the front of my body, but as soon as she’s eye level, I tighten my arms around her again. “How taken are you?”

The light reflecting in her eyes dims, and she presses her palms against me. I set her down on her feet and start a silent prayer that she won’t walk away.

Stumbling, she looks up when I catch hold of her waist, and says, “I can’t forget what happened. I’ve tried, and I couldn’t then and that wasn’t even with you standing in front of me.”

“I get it. But, Stella, it wasn’t what you thought it was.”

“How do I know what anything was?” She looks at me with narrowed eyes. “I wasn’t even worth telling.”

“That’s not true.”

“No, that is true.” She gulps in a breath. “You put another woman before me—

“I gave her my word.”

“You gave me a lot more than your word, and you chose her over me. I’ll let you decide how bad that might hurt. Spoiler alert,” she says abruptly. “It didn’t just break my heart. It crushed my soul.”

Crushed. Broken. I did this by not fighting through my own hurt feelings. “I’m sorry. I know it doesn’t matter that I say it, and it fixes nothing, but I am sorry.”

“You’re right. It fixes nothing.” She looks down at her shoes and sighs in disappointment. “I’ve spent years trying to figure out why I wasn’t enough for you to choose me that night.”

“It wasn’t like that.” Christ, I feel like we’re talking in riddles. But outside a bar isn’t the place to talk. Not now. I need time with her. I need to go back to that night and explain it from the top. Not just a quick-fix apology that says little.

“Then what was it like? Or can you not tell me that either?” She laughs humorlessly. She starts to walk away.

“Stella, I didn’t cheat on you, but I understand why you think I did. We need to be somewhere quiet—”

She stops as if I have the answers to the universe. “A part of me thinks it’s dumb I still care about that night, but you broke more than my heart. You broke us.” Dropping my chin, I dare to look up at her just as she huffs. “But to answer your question as to us—I’m taken, Rivers. Very taken.”