Chapter 25
Gage
“This costume sucks, Dad.”
I bit back an exasperated sigh as Lily picked at her Frozen dress with a frown. She adjusted her blonde wig, full of massive amounts of coarse blonde hair intricately braided, with a frown as well. I zipped up the last part of her dress before taking a step back.
“You said the dress from Frozen,” I said. “This is what I picked up at the store.”
“Yeah, but every girl in my class is going to have the same type of dress,” Lily said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. She rolled her eyes at me dramatically. “It’s going to be lame, Dad. I’m going to look the same no matter where I go tonight.”
I did my best to contain my irritation, even though little things like this were starting to wear me down. Marcie had been one of those moms who understood what her daughter needed, or what she desired to do. She would throw Halloween parties in our house for all of Lily’s friends, but that had changed over the years. Our house wasn’t even decorated for Halloween as it once was. Lily never brought the topic up, and I never bothered climbing up into the attic to sort through Marcie’s boxes of decorations.
“You’re beautiful, no matter what,” I said, grabbing my wallet and keys. “Get in the truck if you want to get candy. I get half of your stock because I’m driving you everywhere in Bozeman to get the best candy spots.”
“I don’t think so. You have to get your own candy.”
“We will see about that.”
The entire population of Bozeman was out and about when I managed to find a parking spot in a busy suburb where the middle class lived. It was the same place that I had taken Lily for years because of the impressive turn out. We often walked away with a couple buckets full of candy. I spotted Raychelle waiting for us on the corner as a string of kids darted by her, eagerly dressed up in various costumes.
“Isla from Frozen,” she said, taking in Lily’s costume with a smile. “I’ve seen a couple of those walking by. Come on, now. Let’s get a photo.”
She held up a camera, but Lily shook her head. “No, Aunt Ray. I look the same as everyone else. Mom would’ve made a special costume. Even Amber would’ve done it.”
“Lily,” Raychelle said sharply. “Don’t act ungrateful in front of your father. He has done everything he can to make sure that you are okay.”
Lily looked at me through narrowed eyes, full of tears. I sighed. “Go on, Lily. Find your friends. Please just try to have a good time and not make a scene.”
She didn’t protest. Darting down the sidewalk, Lily headed in the direction of a small group of friends that were waiting for her. The group took off together. Raychelle and I strolled behind them at a slow pace to give them space, but to keep an eye out for them as well.
“I should’ve offered to help with the costume,” Raychelle said guiltily. “I knew that Lily is getting to an age where she wants to be cool and fit in. Wearing the same costume counts as lame to her.”
A headache pounded in my head. To fight of the chill clinging to my fingers, I shoved my hands deep into my coat pockets with a sigh.
“She’s getting to age that I don’t even understand,” I said. “This is where I wish Marcie was the one here to help her go through everything. I don’t have a fucking clue about what I’m doing.”
Raychelle patted me on the shoulder. “You’re doing all that you can do, Gage. It’s not easy being a young girl. It wouldn’t be easy no matter which parent was standing here.”
“It doesn’t feel that way sometimes.”
“And Amber?”
My throat clenched at that. I focused on the various decorative and plastic spiders hiding in the sticky cobweb along the shrubbery of someone’s house as we passed by.
“I thought you had found her,” Raychelle remarked, frowning. “Am I right? I thought that was what you had said a few weeks ago. I never got the chance to ask again.”
“No point in asking,” I replied, bitterness swelling in me again.
My mind flashed to her pregnant and swollen baby with our child growing every single day. I couldn’t get past her keeping that sort of secret from me. It was too much. It hurt too much.
We stopped on the corner of an adjacent street. I watched as Lily walked along with her group of friends, talking with a smile on her lips. All traces of her discontentment were gone now.
“What is going on?” Raychelle asked, frowning. “Don’t bother lying to me about it, either. I’ve read some interesting headlines about the Roselynn family.”
I shrugged my shoulders indifferently. “That’s why Amber claims she went into hiding, to protect her father’s political career. Her ex-husband has been blackmailing her.”
“With what?”
“With our relationship,” I stated coldly. “He has photos, from what Amber told me. He threatened to give them to the press to ruin her father’s career, and to destroy our relationship as well. That is the story that I got when I found her here in Bozeman.”
“And you’re still upset with her?” Raychelle slapped me on the shoulder, hard. She glared at me when I rubbed at my shoulder in surprise. “What is wrong with you, Gage? That poor girl is being blackmailed, and you’re upset with her?”
“She didn’t tell me the truth,” I replied defensively. “I would’ve done everything I could to protect her. She made that decision without me.”
“It’s also your hand in this too, Gage. It takes two consenting adults to get into this sort of thing.” She gave me a hard look then. “What else is there? Something else, I can see. What is it?”
I let out a pent-up breath through my clenched teeth. “There’s a baby, too. My baby according to Amber.”
“A baby?” Raychelle whispered, eyes widening. “Oh, Gage. What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
“I don’t know, Ray. I have no idea what I’m going to do.”
“No, I mean, what are you doing here? You need to make this right if you truly love her. Do you think Marcie would be proud of you for acting like this if she knew about it?”
I grimaced at the thought. “Why did you have to drag Marcie into it?”
“Because you’re a better man than this, Gage. You are a way better than that ex-husband of hers that is trying to destroy her family. Think about it from Amber’s perspective.”
A blonde haired little boy, about the same age as Ethan darted across the street. He was also dressed as Spiderman, with the mask dangling off at his side. My heart ached when I watched the little boy go to his father to grab his hand.
This could be us next year.
I didn’t want to look past Amber hiding her pregnancy from me. No matter what her reasons were, even if they were meant with good intentions, the months of never knowing that she was carrying my child stung. It kept me from enjoying that part of raising a child.
I couldn’t deny it that Amber was the only one that I wanted right now on this chilly Halloween evening, with Ethan and Lily trick-or-treating together.
She was just trying to protect her father, too. I had kept our relationship a secret to protect him. How was what I did, any different from what she did?
The two of us wanted to protect the ones we loved more than anything in the world. At the end of the day, I didn’t care what Scott leaked to the press. Amber belonged with me, not him. Our child would be raised with love, despite what the media and general public opinion said.
“Gage.”
I looked over at Raychelle as she smiled at me knowingly. “Go to Amber. I know that you want to go. I’ll watch after Lily tonight.”
“Thank you. I appreciate it.”
The neighborhood Amber lived in was alive with trick-or-treaters, too. I parked in front of Amber’s house to find a bowl of candy on the front porch step, and all the lights were clicked off. I knocked on the door to double check if Amber was home before starting down the street.
I let out a relieved breath when I found a lone Spiderman in a group of Ninja Turtles walking together from door to door. I recognized the blonde curls of Amber’s hair as she walked along behind them with a group of other parents.
She never looked more beautiful than right there, dressed in a pair charcoal leggings, a black shirt that stretched across her pregnant belly, and the rusty orange cardigan she wore. Her blonde curls bounced as she waddled slightly in a pair of simple boots.
“Amber!” I called out to gain her attention.
Amber stopped at the sound of my voice. She turned to look back at me with wide eyes, visibly shocked to see me standing behind her on the sidewalk a few feet back.
“Gage?” She blinked a few times. “What are you doing here?”
“You know why I’m here,” I said.
She glanced at the group of women surrounding her, but they quickly dispersed in the direction of Ethan and his group of friends further down the street. Amber approached cautiously with her arms crossed over her chest. A puzzled frown tugged at her lips.
“I’m confused,” she said. “I thought you were upset with me. Why are you here?”
I took her cold hands in my own. “I don’t want to go through this life wondering what we could’ve done together. You know what I mean?”
“Of course, I know what you mean. I’ve been thinking the same thing.” Amber glanced over at the SUV’s that were parked alongside the road. “Gage, we can’t do this here on the street. Not yet. I don’t want my father’s security team to put the pieces together before I can say anything.”
“You’re right,” I said, and let go of her hands reluctantly. I gazed at her while desire burned through me all over again. “I love you, Amber. I’m sorry for the way I acted a few weeks ago.”
Amber smiled at me tenderly. “I can’t say that I blame you for being upset. I’m sorry too for everything that has happened. Walk with Ethan and me?”
“What about your father’s security?” I asked as I followed her down the sidewalk, longing to reach for her hand. To feel some sort of connection again.
“I’ll tell them you stopped by to make sure Ethan was having a good Halloween. They won’t bother us unless I give them the signal to come over.”
“Right.”
I spent the rest of the evening following Amber and Ethan around the affluent neighborhood, decorated with expensive decorations. The air smelt of crisp apples and dry leaves. Halfway through the walk home, Ethan placed his little gloved hand in my own hand as we walked back down the street.
“I’m glad you’re here,” he said. “You make Mommy happy.”
Tears filled Amber’s eyes. She looked away hastily to hide them before Ethan could see. I smiled down at Ethan and smoothed a hand down the back of his fair head.
“I’m happy to be back too, buddy. I’m not going anywhere.”
I sat down on the couch in the living room while Amber whisked Ethan off for a warm bath to fight off the chill. There was no doubt in my mind that word would reach Beau that I had spent the night here at Amber’s house. His security knew where I was, but all of those doubts fell away when Amber came back downstairs. She slid onto my lap, straddling my hips before I could get up.
“I’m glad you’re here,” she breathed, pressing a kiss up against my lips that instantly set my blood ablaze. “I love you, Gage. Please don’t leave me ever again?”
“I don’t plan on it,” I replied, reaching between us to rub at her swollen belly tenderly. “Don’t leave me again either, Amber. Everything will work out. I’ll make sure of it. I promise.”
Amber’s arms tightened around my neck as she leaned in to kiss me. I gladly accepted it with a relieved groan and smoothed my hands down her waist. It delighted me to feel the changes in her body. She was softer with pregnancy at certain curves along her hips and thighs. Her belly pushed up against me, something I welcomed happily. She tasted of apple cider and cinnamon from earlier in the evening. Her skin felt soft, softer then I remembered.
I pulled back with one hand buried in her hair. “Where’s your room? Upstairs?”
“Yes,” she said.
“We better move up to the room, then,” I replied, adjusting her weight across my lap. The heat of her pushed down on my already rock-hard erection. “Don’t want anyone taking unflattering photos of me in a weird position.”
She let out a muffled giggle at that before climbing off my lap to take my hand. “Very funny. None of them were unflattering of you.”
“I’ll pretend that I believe you.”
We tiptoed up the front stairs after Amber punched in the security code next to the door. The upstairs was quiet, a positive sign that Ethan had drifted off to sleep without any issues. Amber hooked a finger through mine to pull me into the back bedroom. I didn’t waste any more time. I gathered her into my arms and pressed a heated kiss to her lips.
Chapter 26
Amber
Nothing could prepare me for the moment that Gage had called out my name in the middle of the street. I had mentally prepared myself after our fight to bring this baby into the world alone. That was until Gage came sweeping in to apologize and confess that he still loved me.
My heart never felt fuller than it did right then, with Gage’s tongue sweeping into my mouth for a kiss that overwhelmed every bit of my senses in the best way. Blood thrummed through my body eagerly as his hands did quick work on freeing my upper body of clothes. Violent shivers wracked my body as his roughened hands smoothed up over my back, taking his time while we stumbled in the direction of my bed.
“Beautiful,” Gage breathed against my lips, fingers unclasping my bra with ease. “You do you know how beautiful you are, right?”
“I don’t feel beautiful,” I whispered, resisting the urge to cover up my swollen breasts and stomach. “I feel like a cow, to be honest with you.”
Gage chuckled against my lips as he drew my hands away from my chest. “You’re pregnant, Amber. You look sexy as hell right now.”
Boldened by the compliment, I reached forward to tug Gage’s shirt up over his head as well. Our bare chests touched when I leaned up on my tiptoes to press a kiss above his already racing heart.
“I love you,” I said. “More than anything in the world, Gage. I honestly love you so much.”
“I love you too, baby. More than you could ever imagine. Now.” His hand gently nudged me to sit down on the edge of the bed. “Relax, sweetheart. You deserve this.”
My heart thumped wildly as his fingers hooked on the elastic band of my leggings and underwear to tug both things down my legs. I was relieved inwardly that I had managed to shave my legs this morning. Shaving had become an ordeal over the past few months. I didn’t even want to think of what it looked like between my legs, so when Gage crouched down between my spread legs, a stab of embarrassment went through me.
“Gage,” I warned, running my fingers through his silky hair. “I haven’t been able to get a razor down there for at least two months.”
Gage pressed a hot kiss to the inside of my thigh. He chuckled against the sensitive skin there before looking up at me with a devious smile.
“It looks the same,” he assured. “Lean back and relax.”
“If you’re sure.”
“I’m sure.”
I didn’t get a chance to protest anymore. Gage’s lips were working their magic against the center of me. It never ceased to amaze me how skilled Gage was when it came to this. He knew what I liked and when to increase the sucking and tempo. He knew every bit of my body, and what it needed to go up to that pinnacle of pleasure.
We had been apart for so long. Things moved quickly, and my release came barreling down hard. I tasted blood distantly when I bit down on the inside of my cheek to keep myself quiet with Ethan right down the hall. My body spasmed pleasantly in the aftermath. I gazed up at Gage while he undid his pants with a smug smile.
“I’m glad you haven’t lost your touch,” I said breathlessly.
I scooted back to the center of the bed to give us plenty of room to stretch out. A wave of dizziness crashed over me suddenly. I sat up to drop my head between my knees with a gasp.
“Amber? You okay?”
I felt the bed dip down as Gage crawled across to my side. He rubbed my shoulders soothingly until the feeling passed. I looked up at Gage to find him frowning down at me in concern.
“Just lightheaded, is all,” I said. “The rush of blood. I can’t lay on my back for very long, either.”
“Do you want to keep going?” Gage asked. “We can stop if this is too much for you. I should’ve known—”
I pressed a finger to his lips before leaning in to kiss him. The saltiness of me still lingered on the tip of Gage’s tongue. I kissed him for a long moment before pulling back with a smile.
“There are positions to prevent me from getting lightheaded,” I said and tugged him down to the bed behind me. The feeling of Gage’s muscular body pressing up against the backside of me was exquisite as his strong arms wrapped around me protectively. I reached behind to coax him between my legs, and the sensation of him filling me to the hilt brought tears to my eyes.
Our hips rocked together in a gentle rhythm as we went higher and higher together to that teetering edge of release. Gage let out a throaty groan as he buried his face into the crook of my neck. His fingers reached around my hip to cup me while he increased the depth and pace of his thrusts in approach of his own orgasm.
My eyes slipped closed when wave after wave of bliss crashed over my quivering body. I distantly heard Gage cry out with his own release before stilling against my body. Our connected flesh throbbed deliciously in the aftermath of our release. I snuggled up against Gage as close as I could get, to feel how hard his heart pounded against my back. I felt him press a kiss against the back of my sweaty neck.
“I meant for it to last longer,” he said, gasping. “I really didn’t mean for this to go too fast tonight.”
I squeezed his hand that rested on my belly with a smile. “Don’t worry about that. We will have much more time.”
“I didn’t hurt you, right? Or the baby?” His fingers flexed protectively against the curve of my stomach.
“No,” I said, rolling out from beneath his arm to sit up. “Plenty of cushion down there. I was cleared for sex a long time ago.”
“Thank goodness for that,” he murmured, nuzzling his cheek against my back. “I’d be going crazy right now if you told me we couldn’t have sex.”
“There’s other ways to relieve the tension.”
He chuckled at that. “Good point, I suppose.”
We fell into comfortable silence as I floated in and out of consciousness under Gage’s fingers, tracing errant patterns on my back.
“Amber?”
I blinked back awake at the sound of his rumbling voice. “Hmm?”
“It’s getting late,” Gage said. “I don’t want to stay here all night because the security team will say something to your father. Unless you want me to stay.”
“Right,” I said, disappointment swelling in me. “It would probably be a good idea for you to go until we figure out what we want to do.”
“What is there to figure out?”
Gage sat up alongside me on the bed. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders, pulling me close to him. I let my head rest on his bare shoulder while gazing through the darkness of my room.
“Where do we go from here?” I asked. “That’s a good question to answer for starters.”
“It is,” he agreed, stroking my arm. “Well, I’m not planning to leave you. I hope you aren’t planning to leave me again.”
“I’m not. I can promise you that.”
“Then, you come back to my cabin with me. I’ll tell your father that after doing some talking, you feel comfortable coming back with me. Does that sound feasible?”
“It could work,” I said slowly. “He’d probably like the idea better because he wants to know who the father is.”
My stomach twisted guiltily for lying. Again. It was hard sometimes to pick apart the sincerity and genuine moments with Gage when everything else outside of our relationship felt like a double life. I knew that my father was going to be beyond angry. Devastated. Disappointed. The scandal of it was going to be huge.
And yet, I didn’t want to live alone with this secret. At least I could share it with Gage along the way.
“How about it, then?” Gage asked. “That way we can deal with this together. I’ll be able to keep an eye out on you, too.”
“Scott has been trying to find me,” I pointed out, a shiver going up my spine. “If he sees me with you—”
“Let’s just deal with it if that day does come,” Gage interrupted. “For now, come back with me to the cabin. Lily misses you and Ethan both. We can tell the both of them we are going to have a baby together.”
I looked at Gage with arched eyebrows. “You told Lily about us?”
“Not really,” he said, grimacing. “She’s smarter than I gave her credit for. She figured out that something happened between us a long time ago. So, she knows that I am moving on with my life.”
“And she’s okay with that?” I asked cautiously. The last thing I wanted to do was intrude on Lily’s memories of her mother. I knew the two of them were close to one another.
Gage gave me a long and intense look. “She misses you, period. Does that help make you feel a bit better?”
“A little,” I said. “Ethan misses you, too. Our baby deserves to have two parents together.”
“Very much agreed, darling. It’s a deal then?”
“Yes. I want to come back to the cabin with you.”
Thanksgiving arrived with a snowstorm a few weeks later. After spending the past few days preparing for dinner, I was more than ready to stuff myself with turkey and mashed potatoes. The sound of Lily and Ethan playing happily upstairs, along with Gage’s voice, brought a smile to my face as I checked the turkey’s temperature again.
The smell of turkey and stuffing filled the entire house. I peeled the last of the potatoes while listening to three of them upstairs set up the nursey for Mollie’s arrival in a month. Gage had insisted on getting the room ready the second that Ethan and I had officially unpacked our things. So, we spent the previous week shopping in Bozeman after attending my ultrasound appointment.
My heart wanted to burst from joy and happiness. Our tiny little family was perfect, and about to expand. I didn’t want to come out of it. I just wanted to stay in the kitchen, cooking a Thanksgiving dinner for my family to enjoy in a few hours.
The phone rang right as I set the pot of chopped potatoes and water onto the stove. I quickly turned the burner on and grabbed the landline before it went to the answering machine.
“Hello?”
“Ah, I’m glad you answered, sweetheart. I didn’t know if I would be able to get ahold of you both with this storm coming in.”
I smiled at the sound of my father’s cheerful voice on the other end of the phone. I could hear the familiar sound of voices in the background as well. He had remained in D.C. for Thanksgiving because of a major snowstorm lingering over Colorado and Montana. My mother was set to fly into D.C. later tonight, from what I remembered about her email to me.
“How is the weather in D.C.?” I asked, wiping my hands dry on a towel. “No snow for you there?”
“No snow here, but I don’t mind a break from it. I just wanted to remind you that I’m hosting a joint Christmas party this year with Montana’s congressmen.”
I tensed at that. The last thing I wanted to do was to go to a Christmas party to overhear a million questions. My father had dropped the topic for now, but I knew the party would be an invitation for him to ask questions.
“I don’t know if that would be a good idea, Dad, for me to go,” I said. “That’s close to my due date. What if Scott arrives there, too?”
“He isn’t invited to the party, Amber. I’m not taking no for answer. You can’t hide in the shadows forever.”
“I can certainly try.”
He sighed into the phone. “Just please do me a favor and show up. That’s all I’m asking you to do. I won’t press you for information, if that’s what you’re worried about. Even if it would be nice to know who the father of my grandchild is.”
“I told you that I’m not going to talk to you about that right now,” I said, irritation sweeping through me. “I’ll go if you promise not to pester me about it. Nobody else can pester me, either.”
“That’s fine. Scout’s honor, dear. I’ll see you in a few weeks, then.”
“See you in a few weeks. Happy Thanksgiving, Dad.”
“Make a nice big turkey for Gage. This is his favorite holiday because it gives him an excuse to get fat.”
He hung up before I could reply to that. I set the phone back down in the cradle with a sense of dread growing inside of me. A pair of strong arms encircled my waist, resting on top of my baby belly. I leaned back against Gage’s strong chest without hesitation.
“Who was that?” he asked.
“My father,” I said. “He wanted to remind me that he is having a Christmas party here in Bozeman. He wants me to go.”
“Might be something fun to go to before Mollie arrives,” Gage said. “Why are you hesitating?”
“I just have a bad feeling about it, is all. I can’t explain it.”
Gage’s arms loosened from around me. He pressed a kiss to the side of my head with a smile.
“Try not to worry so much,” he said. “Nothing bad is going to happen. We will figure everything out like we have been. Okay?”
I forced a smile on my face, despite a little voice inside my head saying that shit was about to hit the fan. I could feel it. Something was bound to happen at the Christmas Party.