Natalie
My brother left me on my own to clean up. Figures. He was never one for cleaning up messes. Everyone has finally cleared out except for Trey. He’s lingering in the living room talking to my dad. I shake my head, continuing with rinsing the plates, and shoving them into the dishwasher. Ma had to use the good china, unlike normal people who use paper or Styrofoam plates when they host a big outdoor party.
I hear my parents laughing, but I can’t hear what they are chatting about with Trey. I don’t know why I care. Trey made my place in his life known loud and clear with his actions, or lack of I should say.
“Thanks for staying and cleaning up, baby.” Ma kisses my temple and squeezes my shoulders.
“Of course,” I say with a yawn, feeling emotionally exhausted. If I don’t do it who will? I know she’s tired too.
“I’m turning in. You and Trey can get the tables and chairs folded. He said he’s glad to help out.”
Oh perfect.
“You staying over or going home after?”
“I’m going home. I open tomorrow,” I lie. I am ready to be away from Trey. He’s in the next room and his presence is smothering me.
Dad and Trey join us as Ma rattles on about leaving the pots for tomorrow.
“Nate and me can do the tables and chairs in the morning, don’t worry about them. You still have a key to Nate’s apartment, don’t you? Trey is going to run some of the boxes from the garage over for us while he’s here with his truck.”
I nod as I put the last plate in. Dad kisses me goodnight, then him and Ma make their way upstairs leaving me on my own with Trey, and those damn grey eyes. He takes a step toward me. “Bunny, I know sorry doesn’t begin to cover my taking off like I did, but...”
“Where were you?” I smack his chest.
“My deployment got moved up and I had to go. I didn’t have a choice, baby.” He steps into me and pulls me close. My eyes bug out as he leans in close to me. What’s he doing? Is he going to kiss me? “Natalie, I love you. I’ve always loved you. But I got scared. I didn’t think it was fair to ask you to wait for me. What if I didn’t come home? In my mind it was the right thing to cut off contact. I couldn’t put you through the worry. I made a lot of mistakes, but my biggest one was running away from my feelings for you. I will never be good enough for you, but I am asking for a chance to try.”
I can’t help it when I look into those eyes that hold my soul, I get angry. He has some damn nerve. I smack him and start to cry. He grips my waist, clinging to my hips. “Please. Bunny, I’m sorry.”
I shake my head. I can’t do this with him right now. He has some damn nerve.
“When did you come home?” I ask wondering if he’s been home longer than he has lead me to believe.
“I was in Germany for a while.” He swallows hard. “But I came home a few months ago after my divorce,” he confesses. He was married? What the serious fuck? No one ever thought to tell me this shit? I can feel angry vibrations starting to rattle through my body. “I took a new job in Monroe at a new mechanic shop. I had to get myself together for my son. He needed a father and I had to do what was needed to be there for him.”
I try to pull away. Not wanting to hear anymore. Trey not only got married to someone they had a child together. I feel sick. Hurt. Betrayed.
“Please, listen to me. I was dumb. I met Yvonne in Germany. She was an American studying abroad. I was lonely over there and there she was at the time. I was caught up in the moment, having fun and made a mistake. She contacted me six months later and told me she was pregnant. I did what I thought was the right thing. I found out the morning after we slept together. I was so confused. I didn’t want to hurt you, but…I did. I was scared. I called Joe JR and he told me to do the right thing. You deserved a good man, not some guy with nothing to offer but a kid on the way. It was Joe JR that made me see sense. He knew how I felt about you and he wouldn’t give me his blessing, until I got my shit straight. He made me promise I wouldn’t contact you until I was ready to give you the world. I fucked up but I’m here to right my wrongs, Nattie.”
“You could have told me about the baby,” I tell him softening a tad. “I would have been there for you.”
“I was scared to hurt you with the truth. I tried so hard to make shit work with Yvonne for our son, but we weren’t compatible. Will you give me a chance, Bunny?”
I suck in a deep breath. Is he really asking me this right now? “Trey, you show up after years of no contact expecting me to just give you everything like you didn’t ghost me? Like you didn’t believe in me. You didn’t even give me a fair chance. You took the choice away from me. What if I’m with someone?” I’m not but he doesn’t know that.
“You’re not,” he says firmly.
“What makes you so sure?”
“Because, you’re mine. You’ve been mine since we were seven years old, and I’m not taking no for an answer.”
He’s looking at me full of assurance.
“Say yes already!” Ma calls from the stairway. Her and dad are watching with tears in their eyes. They knew. I can’t even be upset that they are spying.
“Whatta ya say, Bunny. Are you gonna be my girl?” The way Trey is looking at me with such hope makes it hard to gaze into his eyes and tell him no.
“I don’t know, Trey.” I shake my head. “I want to give you the benefit of the doubt, but how do I know you won’t run on me again?’
“You don’t. All I am asking for is a real shot.”
My head is screaming no, but my heart is yelling yes.
“Okay. I have questions.”
“I’ve got answers.” He grins.
“Trey. I’m not making any promises.”
“I accept that.”
Ma and dad offer congratulations and hug us both before going upstairs for real. I’ll break their hearts later, once Trey tries to break my heart all over again. I don’t have faith in him. Not after the stunt he pulled.
I look down at her entwined fingers knowing he isn’t promising forever. He only wants a chance to see if there is something still between us. I know I should tell him all the reasons we will never work right now, but when he’s looking at me I can scarcely breathe.
“Where do we go from here?” I ask unsure of what the future holds once we step out of my parent’s kitchen.
“To drop those boxes off, then hopefully you’ll let me sleep next you tonight, and hold you in my arms, after I make up for leaving you last time.”
“I can try,” I whisper, hoping like hell I can be strong enough to let him go.
I’m terrified to put myself out on a limb for him. But I am even more scared of the regret I will feel if I don’t see this night through at least.
**
The moment we enter Nate’s apartment Trey drops the boxes and goes straight for the kill.
His mouth is on mine, fiery and all consuming. I have never been able to resist him. Not even when he would piss me off when we were kids. He gave me the nickname Bunny one summer when I gave myself a haircut and my pigtails would stand straight up. He said they looked like rabbit ears and started calling me Bunny. I used to cry at first when he’d call me that but as we grew older it became a term of endearment.
“Trey…” I pull back, but he doesn’t let up. The man is relentless.
“I told you, Nattie. I came back this time for you. I’m not taking no for an answer. I’m not walking away. You can fight me. Fight this pull between us, but I will keep coming back.” He nips at my bottom lip with his teeth and my knees nearly buckle.
His hand slides up the back of my shirt, searing me with his heated touch.
I don’t want to fight this. I want to give in and be with him if only for tonight and come morning I want to do to him what he did to me. I want to vanish. I want to give him a taste of his own medicine. I want him to sit and wonder. I want to punish him. I know it sounds childish, but I feel like it would make me feel a hell of a lot better. What Trey doesn’t know. What no one knows is when we made love that first and only time, I got pregnant too. The pregnancy was a tubal. I lied and told my parents I had the stomach flu and a bad period. They believed my lie. All I wanted was for Trey to be there. For him to hold me and tell me everything was gonna be all right even if it wasn’t. I’ve always wondered what could have been had I been able to carry our child. I never got the chance to tell him and now I doubt I ever will.
“Stop overthinking it. We’ve always been good together.” He comes in for another kiss and I am a goner. I’m consumed and fueled by passion.
As though we haven’t spent years apart.