Natalie
“Is living next to me going to be a problem for Audrey?” Nate questions as we get in the car.
“I don’t think so. I mean, she will get used to seeing you, in time. She really loved Joe, ya know?” I hope that Nate being around might do Audrey some good. Be the hard dose of reality she needs to snap her back to the land of the living. I’m not saying she needs to start dating or anything. However, getting out of her manic-depressive spiral would be a start.
“Is she paying us rent for her apartment? How does that all work?”
I swallow and think of my next words carefully. Nate, like Ma, doesn’t seem to be an Audrey fan. He doesn’t know her, yet. She’s a wonderful person, she’s just a bit lost right now. Joe JR kept her grounded. He was her world.
“As I’ve told you, Audrey was living with Joe, and well he was planning to propose that night. He had asked Ma for Grandma Mundie’s ring. It was in his pocket when he died…” I have to choke back my tears to continue. If only I was a good sister and had just been happy for him. I shake my head continuing with what I want to say. “Joe, well...you know how practical he was. He had a plan for everything. He knew he wanted to spend his life with Audrey from the start. When Grandfather left us the money, Joe had a Will made up.” I steal a glance at my brother. He’s looking out the window, only when he looks at me and nods for me to finish I see that he is listening. “He left his part of the business and his apartment to Audrey, she’s now our third partner.”
“Huh,” he says with a grunt. “Guess Ma wasn’t happy about that.”
“She hasn’t said much about it surprisingly since the reading. At first she was upset but I talked her down.”
His knee is bouncing, and I wonder if being home is too much for him. What I know that our family doesn’t is that Nate was discharged six months ago. He’s been in a mental health facility, until yesterday. Joe didn’t even know. That’s the real reason he couldn’t attend Joe’s memorial, he didn’t have clearance for his safety and ours. The first few months he was in the hospital he was violent and would have episodes where he thought he was still in combat, and well…it wasn’t pretty.
“Hey, you okay?” I ask as we pull up to our childhood home.
“Just ready to take my bike out. Dad said he had it serviced last week and took it down the block.”
Nate has always had a habit of running away when things get to be too much. I wasn’t shocked when he enlisted in the Army at the rate he was going. Smoking pot and stealing cars. Not exactly something you want to stick around and face punishment for. He’s no longer a troubled youth, beside me now is a hardened man.
The birdhouse mailbox greets us as I park. The boys built it, and I painted it for Mother’s Day, years ago. I can’t believe it’s still standing, we did such a crap job, but Ma loved it. She made dad put it on a post first thing that morning.
My brother stretches his legs and makes to get out. Ma and Dad are already running out the door and down the steps of the white two-story colonial. Ma is crying of course, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing his cheeks.
Even our hard ass father has a few wet streaks on his face as he pats Nate on the back gruffly. “Welcome home, son.” His brown eyes crinkle as he tries to hide his tears.
Only thing missing is Joe JR. It still doesn’t seem real that he’s gone.
I trail behind, following them inside.
Fake flower arrangements from the funeral are still on display, Ma won’t part with them. Cards of condolences also clutter the coffee table in the living room as though Joe just died. Dad sits in his recliner, Nate takes up the loveseat, leaving me to sit on the couch with Ma.
Pictures of our youth paper the walls. I don’t miss being dressed to match my twin. Ma always loved buying us matching Dick and Jane outfits.
“Is your bag in the car?” Ma asks.
“Nah, it’s at the apartment. I just came over to grab some things and pick up my bike. I’m eager to pick up where Joe left off with the business. I’m sure Nattie could use a break. I take it she’s been running things alone since everything.”
“Nonsense, you’re staying here tonight. I’m cooking your favorite. We have people coming.”
“Damn it, Ma!” Nate snaps. “I’m not in the mood for that.”
Her chin trembles with unshed tears. My brother shoves up from his chair, stomping through the house, and going out the back door.
“Let me go,” I tell her, raising from my chair before she can charge after him.
Out back, I find him on his knees at Joe JR’s grave. I hang back a minute giving him this moment to be alone and accept that our brother is truly gone.