I pressed my hands flat against the table, and tried to keep my cool. But it was hard when you knew that your daughter was the one in danger.
It had been a few days since I’d seen that figure in Paul and Mary’s attic, and since then, I had found myself in a constant state of hyper-awareness. Even hearing Ella’s voice calling my name when I’d been on the brink of finally fucking Mona had been enough to pull me out of how much I wanted her, how long I’d desired this. It turned out to be nothing but a bug on her bedroom window, but it reminded me just how serious things were—and just how on top of shit I was going to have to be over the next few weeks.
Mona had insisted on inviting everyone around so we could put our heads together and figure out what was going on, and, while the support was comforting, it was frustrating that we’d been at this for so long without seeing results.
Amanda, Scott, and Mona sat around the kitchen table, all with notes out in front of them.
“So there wasn’t anything to go on with your sweep of the kitchen?” Amanda leaned over to examine Scott’s notes, and he nodded.
“Nothing,” he agreed. “It’s far too contaminated now. If something like this happens again…” He trailed off, glancing between Mona and I—I guess he must have seen the rage on my face at the very concept, but he didn’t let that stop him. “You need to call me right away. Okay?”
“Okay,” I said through gritted teeth.
“So, Jazz,” Amanda turned to me, ever the professional, “tell me about Ian.”
“The old neighbor?” I was taken aback. I hadn’t thought about him in a long time—not since we managed to get him out of that damn house. “Uh, he was a bit of an asshole.”
“In what way?”
“He was mean to the kids on the block, used to sit out in his garden and call some of them names when they were coming back from school.” I lifted my fingers to begin rhyming off all the shit he’d done over the years to make enemies. “And he would usually have some kind of obsession going on with certain families…”
“Obsessions?” Mona leaned across the table towards me. “Like what?”
“I don’t know.” I shrugged. “I guess he had a bad upbringing or whatever, because he always latched on to these picture-perfect families and ended up overstaying his welcome and getting kicked out.”
“And then?” Amanda cocked her head to the side.
“After it happened a few times, he just stopped leaving the house. Then he put it up for sale, and Mary and Paul moved in, and that was the last any of us in the neighborhood saw of him.”
“So you think he felt alienated by everyone else?” Amanda was pulling her psychologist shit out, and it unsettled me; I didn’t like the thought that we had put him in that position, that we had left him feeling so alone.
“I mean, yeah, probably,” I conceded. “But he was a real creep. He would get attached to little girls—not sexually or anything, just…attached. Overfriendly. That’s how he usually ended up getting cut off from the families he got attached too.”
“Little girls?” Mona raised her eyebrows. “How old?”
“Maybe between, I don’t know, three and six or seven?” I screwed my face up. “I didn’t know the families well enough to guess.”
“So, the age that Ella’s at now?” Mona pointed out gently, and I felt a cold shiver run up and down my back. I glanced up the stairs, in the direction of her bedroom, and tried to push the thought from my head. No. It couldn’t be. He’d been gone for more than two years, and there wasn’t a chance in hell that he was still around. And even if he was—I would kill him with my bare hands before I let him anywhere near my daughter.
“Can we take a smoke break?” Scott yawned. “I need a second to think.”
“Sure, I need to use the bathroom anyway,” Amanda agreed, and before I knew it, the two of them had both vanished, leaving Mona and I alone together.
I’d be lying if I said that I hadn’t thought about that kiss. I mean, the feeling of her lips on mine, of her body against my own, it had haunted my dreams since it happened. I still couldn’t believe I’d let myself do it—as soon as I’d seen her, her hair messy and her skirt ridden up by a few inches, I knew any ounce of self-control I’d been practicing till that moment would no longer suffice. I would have gone all the way with her there, up against the house, if it hadn’t been for Ella.
We glanced at each other, and then glanced away again. Jesus, did I have to act like a complete teenager on top of everything else? I mean, I was attracted to this woman—stupidly so. Why couldn’t I just fucking well do something about it instead of spending half my time around her dancing back and forth between wanting her and trying to stem those feelings?
“Thanks for getting them involved.” I gestured to where Amanda and Scott had been sitting, and she shrugged.
“I want to get this sorted just as much as you do, you know,” she replied, meeting my gaze defiantly. There we were, alone, no one to bother us—with just enough time for me to reach out and touch her, or kiss her, or—
Before I could let that train of thought go any further, Scott re-emerged from outside and took his seat back at the table.
“What were you two talking about?” he asked, looking between us. Maybe he could sense the atmosphere in the room. He would have to be half-blind not to.
“Oh, nothing.” I shrugged. “So, shall we get back to it?”
For the time being, at least, we would have to put the kiss behind us. Because nothing and I mean nothing, was going to get in the way of the investigation into who had hurt my daughter—and whether or not they were planning to do it again.