I had never felt anything like this before in my life. As I pulled him down on top of me, I felt my heart swell with something—an emotion I couldn’t quite put my finger on, something that seemed to defy explanation or reasoning. I raked my nails down his back, and even through his shirt, I could feel him react; arching up to get closer to me, to feel me near him. This wasn’t like before. The last time, it had all been about fucking and trying each other on for size, but this time around…my brain was aching from the whirl of emotions that were pulsing through me with every heartbeat.
I pulled my hand around and placed it on his chest, feeling around until I could make out the pulse of his heart against my fingertips. He pulled back and looked at me, lifting his hand so he could interlock his fingers with mine; both of us, there, staring at each other as we focused on the sensation of his heart beating against our joined hands. I wasn’t sure how long we stayed like that—could have been a second, could have been an hour—but for that moment, nothing mattered but him and me. Everything else seemed to drop away around us, leaving as bare and raw and alone amongst the mess that had sprung up around us.
He leaned down slowly, and caught my lip between his teeth; he tugged on it gently, sending the blood rushing to the surface of my skin. Every motion seemed to be carefully premediated, as if he’d known exactly what he wanted to do with me from the moment I got out of his bed the first time around. He’d been thinking about it as much as I had, and I had every intention of making the most of whatever time we had together. I wasn’t sure what would happen next—whether we would wake up tomorrow and find another layer added to this strange story of ours, one that would push us apart all over again—and all I wanted was to be able to cling on to this moment while we still had it. It was desperate, yes, but that didn’t mean that it wasn’t real.
He moved down, kissing my chin and my throat and that spot where my neck met my breasts. His mouth was warm despite the cool air in the apartment surrounding us, and as soon as his lips met my skin, I knew I wanted more. There would be no stopping this. Nothing could come between us—not the building collapsing around us where we sat—this needed to happen, had needed to happen since the first time we ended up in his bed. I had never felt for anyone the way I did for Jazz in that moment—a build-up of the care and desire and affection we’d built between us over the last few months released in that moment. I felt tears prick my eyes, my mind confused at trying to make sense of so many emotions at once—but I dismissed them, tilting my head so I could watch him moving down my body. I giggled as I watched him flip up my shirt and plant a kiss against my belly—he looked up at me and smiled.
“You smell so good,” he murmured, lowering his mouth to my skin again and skimming his lips up against me. Then, before I knew it, he was between my legs again, fumbling with the fly on my jeans and slipping my panties over my hips. Just like last time. As though he’d been craving me—wanting me all this time without me knowing about it. I wondered if he’d laid in bed late at night and found his mind drifting to the feel of his mouth on my pussy; I knew I had, no matter how much I’d tried to deny it over the past few weeks.
He paused once my jeans were off, and looked up at me; he was close enough that I could feel his breath on me again, and it was sending waves of tingles down my spine. But he didn’t seem to have any intention of going down on me.
“Touch yourself,” he ordered, his voice gentle but fierce in the same breath. I did as I was told at once, not even thinking twice as I slid my hand between my legs. He parted my thighs so he could watch, even though he seemed more trained in on my face than the movement of my fingers. Blood pulsed around my head and my heart began to crash against my ribs as I slipped my fingers against my slick pussy—the relief was palpable, but the look on his face as he watched me was almost too much to take. I had no idea that someone not touching me could be so erotic. His eyes flicked down to my cunt and back up to me as I pushed a finger inside of myself, squirming against it, putting on a show. I wanted him to know how much he turned me on, to see in no uncertain terms that I desired him in ways I couldn’t even imagine.
I always wondered what it would be like if we hooked up again—if the tantalizing wrongness of the situation would serve as the main drive behind it, making it hot, or whether the lust would have vanished after the first time. I was incorrect on both counts; no, something deeper existed between us now. I couldn’t have put it into words—or maybe I was just too afraid to, yet—but it was intoxicating and sexy and intimate and before I knew it I found myself on the brink of coming.
I let out a sharp gasp as I climaxed, my entire body tensing and relaxing in one wave of motion as it happened. Before I had a chance to even think anything else, Jazz caught my fingers in his mouth, sucking lightly; I closed my eyes and focused on the feeling of his tongue against the pads of my hand, and then realized that he was unbuckling his jeans as well. I propped myself up on my elbows as he hurriedly undressed, then climbed up on top of me to kiss me again.
“Can I—”
“God, yes,” I sighed against his ear, not even needing to hear the rest of what he was saying for me to know that I wanted it, wanted him, without question. He grabbed the base of his cock, lined it up, and thrust into me in one swift motion.
“Ah!” I gasped, trying to keep my voice down. I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face against his shoulder, letting his skin muffle the sound of my cries. He moved slowly at first, taking his time until he was all the way inside of me. I arched my hips up, and hooked my ankles together around his waist to allow him deeper access. I closed my eyes and let him fuck me, all too happy to hand over control of the situation to him. He caught my face in one hand and tilted it towards him, kissing me again—this time gently, chaste despite what was going on below the waist. He opened his eyes and looked at me, taking me in, his gaze searching as he thrust harder than before. I pressed a kiss against his chin, running my finger along the sharp line of his jaw and wondering how the hell I had ended up with a man as spectacular as Jazz.
Jazz began to move faster, his breath coming in ragged pants against my ear. I ground up against him, already on the brink of coming again; the second orgasm felt mellow and soft compared to the first, a release rather than a relief, and I let out a small, satisfied moan against his skin. I’d forgotten how good he smelled, and I tightened my grip on him, inhaling deeply, wondering how we’d ever let this get away, how we’d not been doing this since the moment we met.
A few seconds later, I felt his cock twitch inside of me; his grip on me relaxed for a moment, and I realized he must have come. He thrust into me one last time and held himself there for a second, eyes closed and mouth open—I could have watched him like that all night long, I really could, the sight of him in his orgasmic state. But he slowly pulled himself out of me, planting a kiss on my cheek as he did so, and went to grab for his pants. I pulled my knees up to my chest and hugged them tight, watching him, wondering where we went from here now that the fucking was done with.
“We should get some sleep,” Jazz suggested, nodding to the bedroom opposite Ella’s.
I eyed him carefully. “In the same bed?”
“Obviously,” he grinned, and leaned across to kiss me once more. It was soft and gentle, no intent in it beyond him expressing how he felt—and somehow, it was just as good as the screwing we’d just gotten down to.
Jazz held his hand out to me, and I took it, grabbing my pants and underwear from the couch and allowing him to lead me through to the bedroom. I stripped down, curled up on my side, and as soon as I felt Jazz wrap his arms around me and pull me into his chest, I let myself go, drifting off into unconsciousness in a matter of minutes.